Entry 60
Dear
Journal,
Today I went to church as usual, Dan wasn’t there and for
the first time ever; I didn’t care! I used to like so I always usually am
disappointed that he doesn’t come to church, but today I was actually happy
that he didn’t come to church. To me it’s kind of unbelievable; almost like I
actually miss liking him ya know? I remember
developing a crush on him the first day I met him. It was a Saturday; while my
Mom was cleaning up I was in my room listening to my CD player when the
doorbell rang. My Mom answered it of course, I went to see who it was and there
was a boy standing there on the front porch. He was there asking my Mom if she
wanted to purchase some Sally Foster Gift Wrap. My Mom declined and he rode off
on his bike. I later met him in church and discovered he was in fact Dan.
Entry
61
Dear
Journal,
Today I was so happy because I got to see Jim. I love
school days so much now because I get to see Jim. I really do like him so much
more than I ever did Dan. Jim is really the only guy I do like now anyways I
stopped liking all those other guys except for maybe J.T.T. Here is something I
don’t understand about my feelings for Dan, is that if he were to ask me out I
would still say yes, but I don’t like him anymore. I am starting to realize it
is a lost cause to like someone famous like J.T.T. I like Jim more than I used
to like Dan and J.T.T. combined now.
Entry 62
Dear Journal,
Today was the sixth grade honor’s day. I got one reward,
which was this thing in reading. Jim got a good citizen award. We (the band)
got to play while the sixth grade was entering the gym. Later in band we had to
sit on the floor because the chairs were in the gym for the seventh grade band
to use. Jim was sitting behind me and we started to have this huge paper war.
We kept throwing paper back and forth at each other. Then he started to do
which is too disgusting to even mention. While Mr. McArthur all these
perverted things, was playing some tape Jim got up and started to dance like a
little kid, making a complete fool of himself.
Entry 63
Dear
Journal,
Today was our last day of school. The whole day I was
thinking, “This may be the last time I see some of these people,”. I could not help being on the verge of crying. If only I
didn’t have to go to Callaway next year! The only way I might see Jim again is
on Sundays if I go to church with Amy since they go to the same church. I wish
I was going to the Magnet school where Jim was going so at least I could see
him I wrote him a note telling him I like him and that I really do want to stay
friends with him! I asked Mary to give it to him because she rides the bus as
he does. So I can only hope for the best!
Entry 64
Dear Journal,
It’s so hard to believe I will ever see half the people I
left yesterday again. I keep thinking I will be going to school on Monday, when
I really know it is not so. Yeh, I do have the whole
summer to look forward to, but it is not the same! It is really difficult for
me to endure this situation. I feel like crying and I almost want to, but I
still hold back for some reason. I am mostly just depressed over this whole
issue, the fact that I have to go to Callaway and all my other friends are
going to go to Gardner Newman is not at all pleasing for me.
Entry
65
Dear
Journal,
Today I went to church, and I was the only one in my
Sunday School Class there. It is also my month to read a verse from the bible, which
has to do with the sermon, and I have to read it in front of the whole
segregation. So when it was time to get up there I got real nervous, but
succeeded at my task. When I got home I called Christy and asked why they
didn’t come to church she told me they didn’t have a ride. Then I asked her if
she could come over, but her Mom said no. Then later on today she called me
back and asked if her and Dan could come over and I
said sure. All we did was play on the computer, played sega,
and watched a movie. As a final result I believe I still have interest in Dan.
Entry 66
Dear Journal,
Today I went to school with my Mom. I had fun, I guess one
reason may be because I got to see Mr. Arnold he is like 20 something, I sort of have a very very secret
crush on him. I only like him a little and definitely not as much as I like
Jim. I do realize I never stand a chance because he is married, and the age
difference. I feel somewhat strange liking someone that much older than me, but
at least at realistically.
Entry
67
Dear
Journal,
Today I had an awesome time! I got to go over to Sandy’s,
a lady at church, and go swimming. It was so much fun because I have been dying
to go swimming and I finally got a chance too! I kept hoping that Dan and
Christy would come so I would get to see Dan, since I am back to liking him
again. Yet my feelings for Dan fluctuate just as they do for Mr. Arnold.
Entry
68
Dear
Journal,
Tonight I got to spend the night with my Mom’s friend
that works with her, Mrs. Thompson. She lets me call her Mrs. Renae though, which is nice. I spent the night at her house
and stayed up until about
Entry
69
Dear
Journal,
On the way home from Mom’s work I asked Mom if it was
okay if I asked someone if I could go over to their house and go swimming and
she approved. So when we got home I asked for suggestions on who
to call and she asked if I could wait until another day. That made me so angry
because I didn’t understand if she said yes in the first place if she was only
going to disappoint me like that. Then I went in my room and saw my Mom had
come in there and moved everything in there, which didn’t help my emotions
become any more positive. I almost wanted to scream at her, so I went in her
room and asked her why she moved everything around. Then she said, “Shoot I
forgot to fix it.” As she was walking in my room to put everything back in its
place, I decided to go and play the organ to attempt to blow off some steam,
but before I know it I hear her telling me to change. I couldn’t change because
she was in my room where all my clothes were, so I sat and waited for her to
get out of my room first. Then when she was walking out of my room she said, “I
said go change.” “I was waiting for you to get out of my room first,” I replied
back to her, “Oh, and for the millionth time please stay out of my room,” I
added. The next thing I know she is screaming in my face and I’m as mad as can
be and I walk in my room and become even more upset when I see she really
didn’t even put anything in its proper place.
Entry
70
Dear
Journal,
Today I stayed home and didn’t go to school with my Mom
because I was too tired. Anyway I was pretty much bored the whole time I mean I
had nothing to do except talk on the phone. I was trying to call Mary to make
sure she gave Jim that note on the bus, but she’s not going to be home for the
next couple of weeks because she is visiting with her Dad so I will have to
wait until she gets back and hopefully by then she won’t have forgotten. I am
afraid he didn’t get the note because I think he may have checked out early
because I saw him walking down the hall with his bookbag
and his teacher told him to give her a call next year and tell her how he is
doing. I know he wasn’t a car rider because he would have been going in the
opposite direction, so who knows.
Entry
71
Dear
Journal,
Today I went to spend the night with Kim for her birthday
party. I met her friend Tiffany, and I ended up inviting them both to
Entry
72
Dear
Journal,
Kim opened all her presents today,
we had cake and ice cream too. I bought her a card and gave her $10. Her
friends Stacy, Chan, Travis, and Bridgette came over. I think that Travis was
sort of cute. Chan looked like a girl. I went home eventually and celebrated
Father’s Day. I bought my Dad a calendar, which he likes. On the way home we
stopped by the mall, and I bought the Alanis Morrisette CD, which I was pretty satisfied with.
Entry
73
Dear
Journal,
I went to
Entry 74
Dear
Journal,
I woke up this morning and my face was burning up. My
eyes were almost swollen shut and my head is still blistering. I am hurting so
bad on my face that I can barely smile; much less raise my eyebrows. I also got
sunburned on my back, but it is not half as bad as my face. I kept a washcloth
wrapped around ice on my face almost the entire day, to help cool it off a bit.
I just hope I don’t end up getting this burnt while in
Entry
75
Dear
Journal,
Amy is in Disney World right now with her Mom and Dad she
left on Tuesday and they are supposed to come back on Monday. I have also
decided to write some notes to some of my good friends that went to Gardner
Newnan with me. It is going to be like a goodbye note since I might never see any
of them again. I have only written one today and it is ready to mail it is for
Entry
76
Dear
Journal,
My sister Kathy is coming to visit us for the weekend, and
she is supposed to come today; I can’t wait! We rarely fight, and when we do it
turns into a screaming and cussing match. My dog, Tizzy ran off today and we
searched for her forever (actually only about 2 hours). Then my Dad found her
and I was so mad at her, but happy that we found her and she didn’t disappear
on us, because I love that dog to death.
Entry 77
Dear
Journal,
My sister finally got here and she brought her wedding dress
for her to show my Dad what it looks like. She got here at like
Entry
78
Dear
Journal,
My Mom, sister, and I had to get up early today because
we had to go register at the Hillstreet House which
is a place where you pick out what you want for your wedding shower. Then after
we got done registering we decided to go to Knickers to eat lunch where I got
the fried shrimp dinner with fries, a salad, and a sprite to drink. Then when
we left there we went across the street to the mall and went to Belk and Kathy
got some makeup for her birthday, which was last weekend. My Mom also got me a
watch which has everything except a calculator, and a necklace with a cross on
it.
Entry
79
Dear
Journal,
We went to church today and it was my turn to read the
verse out of the bible with Dewayne during the sermon. This time it was not so bad as the last time, as in I wasn’t that nervous. I did
start to get butterflies in my stomach when Dewayne said my name,
my voice did also seem a little shaky. I always get nervous when I am in front
of a big group though, it is good to know I am not the
only person that gets like that though. It is just one of the many aspects of
my personality.
Entry 80
Dear
Journal,
Kathy went home today, but she is coming back in just a few
days because this weekend we are leaving for
Entry
81
Dear
Journal,
Amy and her friend Jennifer came along with me to V.B.S
today. Dan is out of town and I am waiting for him to get back so I can see him
and decide if I really like him or not. I finally talked to Mary about the note
I wrote Jim and she said she wasn’t riding the bus that day so she gave it to
Kathy and he ended up not even being on the bus so she tore it up and threw it
away. In a way I am kind of disappointed, but kind of relieved that he didn’t
get it because at least this way if I ever end up going to church with Amy
again I won’t get all nervous about seeing him.
Entry 82
Dear
Journal,
My Mom and I had to take Charlie to the vet today because of
his skin problem, so the doctor gave him a shot. Then afterwards we stopped by Hardee’s to get me something to eat and went home. Amy and
Jennifer came with me again to V.B.S.. Dan was there,
and that was the first time Amy has ever seen him. After seeing Dan some of my
feelings did come back for him, and I realize that I now only like him about
half as much as I used too. We played volleyball at V.B.S. and my team lost,
and Dan was on the opposite team. After the game I walked by him and he called
me a “Loser” so I turned around chased after him; pushed on the ground; got on
top of him, and started hitting him. The whole time he was laughing at me even
though it only lasted a couple of minutes.
Entry
83
Dear
Journal,
I had to babysit today and I
got $11 for it. No one came with me to V.B.S. today. Amy is supposed to come
with me tomorrow. We are leaving for
Entry 84
Dear
Journal,
We took Rascal to the kennel today to stay at while we are
in
Entry 85
Dear
Journal,
It took forever to get to
Entry
86
Dear
Journal,
We spent half of the day in the ocean with Aunt Kathy
today. We spent the rest of the day in the pool. After we rested for a little
while, I started to cough and had a headache along with stomach aches and every
time I started to take a deep breath my throat hurt. I don’t know where any of
this is coming from, but I do know that I really don’t feel good at all.