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| Captain Curry |
| Little Beard |
| Mac MacGrog |
| Biggen a.k.a Sebastian Guyman |
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| Morgan the Gray |
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| The ScallyWags semi retired players |
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| The Crew |
| Our fearless yet not so feared Captain Curry. Rumor has it that the actor Tim Curry was named after our Captain do to an uncanny resemblance and their mutual fetish for wearing fishnet stockings. . |
| The Captains first mate Little Beard, he swears that the Captain mated before thou. We made him grow the beard becuase every one kept mistaking him for a strung out Gwenith Paltrow. . |
| Cookie - if you've met him we need not say more. WARNING! in compliance with state law this person may be a sexual offender, or is that offensive sexually. I don't know, all the female plantiffs always end up missing or (as Cookie says) "satisfied". |
| Pat McCrotch, or some times known as Mac MacGrog at kids shows, is the ships resident Scottsman. He was voted class clown three years straight yet never attended a day of school in his life, go figure. |
| Sebastian Guyman, the ships pilot,is affectionatly called Big 'N'. No one knows what the "N" stands for but we think he may be spelling it IN. Don't get too attached to him though, he still has to answer as to why the ship ended up in Kansas. |
| Morgan the Gray (he had to earn that 'R' in his last name). Do you know how every ship has that one guy on it that just creeps everyone out...Ya well he creeps Morgan out too. Yes we like to call him big "M" little organ (get it? I crack me up). All kidding aside Morgans a great guy who's always looking for a friend.....who has a friend if you know what I mean. |
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| Rusty Weapons...no thats not just what the ladys call him in bed, he earned the name as the ships weapons officer. Once known as "Rusty the Corrupted" later known as "Rusted the Corruptor" and now known as inmate 11572, Rusty has proven he is a valuable tool for getting the ladys to the show ... or was it he has a valuable tool to show the ladys? |
| Rusty Weapons |
| Ash the Good/ and Bad |
| Good , Bad...he's the guy with the gun. Rumor has it he is good at going to bad places...I think he meens that sexually. Ash is the ships "Rationalisation Officer" , he has to rationalize why we do what we do...including letting himhave that particular job. |
| Peg Leg O'Brien |
| Peg Leg O'Brien of the infamus O'Brien brothers that perform in "Heavy Metal Combat". Peg Leg pulls so many dutys he dosn't have time to pull on that peg leg of his...so he hangs with us so we will do it for him. Peg lost his leg in an horiffic acident in which his father was run over by an albitros and died before he ever met Pegs mother...ya we thought it was fishy too but we arn't going to question it until we find out what he's useing in place of that lost leg. |
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| Robbin Banks |
| This hairy pirate is like a trained ape...with out the training. Only a man with little morals and no taste would be caught hangin' with Robbin, luckily we all are morally tasteless. |
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| Torianna was the original reason to watch the show back when it was "The ScallyWags & the Pirate Wench". We thought she had left becuase she developed taste and morals but then she married Little beard so that can't be right. |
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| Torianna |
| Sting Ray is the ships Entertainment director suppling us with aged booze and tastless women....or is it the other way around. The beauty about a man this size being the entertainment director is ...your having fun weather you like it or not. |
| Sting Ray Stoney |
| Back up Players |
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