| Women's English: |
| "Yes" = No "No" = Yes "Maybe" = No "It's your decision" = The correct decision should be obvious by now. "Do what you want" = You'll pay for this later. "We need to talk" = I need to vent. "Sure...Go ahead" = I don't wnat you to. "I'm not upset" = Of course I'm upset, you moron! "How much do you love me?" = I did something you're not going to like. "Am I fat?" = Tell me I'm beautiful. "You have to learn to communicate" = Just agree with me. "Are you listening to me?" = [Too late, you're dead.] |
| Men's English: |
| "I'm hungry" = I'm hungry "I'm sleepy" = I'm sleepy "Do you want to go to a movie?" = I'd eventually like to sleep with you. "Can I take you out to dinner?" = I'd eventually like to sleep with you. "Can I call you sometime?" = I'd eventually like to sleep with you. "May I have this dance?" = I'd eventually like to sleep with you. "Nice dress!" = Nice chest! "What's wrong?" = What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma are you going through now? "I'm bored" = Do you want to sleep together? "I love you" = Let's sleep together now! "I love you, too" = Okay, I said it...we better sleep together now! "Let's talk" = I am trying to impress you by showing you that I am a deep person and then maybe you'll like to sleep with me. "Will you marry me?" = I want to make it illegal for you to sleep with other guys. |