| WHY NOW Why now does it come to this? I have given you well over a year or my life and I have little or nothing to show for it You have subverted my heart a thousands times and made me cry a thousands times more To what purpose do I still feel this way for you ? You say things to me that are utterly unjust I feel as if you declare thing only to bruise my heart I believed you and I were ment to endure somethings And somehow in the end we would be together For some motive I thought we would love again I theorized and ploted and strateged I always felt like i was your second valued girl It was as if you could not find someone more useful at that time And I would be worthy only for the time being And at one point, not long prior to this I was gladdened with atleast being that secondary But then I realized maybe just maybe I was better That I was worth more than you fashioned me to think When I realized that, I realized I may be able to leave And it was then you notified me that you still loved me You said you were sorry for what you had done You wanted and need me It was then that you wanted to make me smile It was then you wanted to hold me in your arms It was then that you never wanted me to leave and I thought "then" was to late I was so far set on moving on I did not realize I still might love Still I wanted to leave And not be tied down by my hopes My hopes that you might love me again But I do still care for you I care for you more than anyone else And in time that my change In time you may become my secondary But I was too dependent of you I longed to me near you so much Yet when with you You wonded me more than you aided me You made me feel like dirt, "guess who likes me now" Well I'm sorry but it's you turn to feel like that filth Or atleast thats what I want you to think Then again maybe not. |