Colour Portrait World
Pregnant. She�s pregnant.
Steph and I are having a baby!
Oh, wow. Steph and I are having a baby�
It�s the most unbelievable feeling in the world. We have been trying for so long, and finally, when all hope seems lost for our marriage � salvation. Our baby. The most amazing, most beautiful, most awe inspiring thing in this world, and Steph and I are going to have one.
Suddenly, everything that�s been happening between us doesn�t matter. All the fighting and arguing and hostility, they all faded into the background because all that mattered was our dream came true. Ironically enough, the one thing that started all our problems is the one thing that is going to save our marriage.
With my eight months out of the ring and nothing to think about but my future, my thoughts turned to family and to fatherhood. And how desperately I wanted it.
But Stephanie had been reluctant. She was too busy with purchasing WCW, with the damned Alliance, with defeating WWF to have time for motherhood. She was too young. She wasn�t ready. It�s a huge step. It�s not the right time.
Simply put � I wanted a baby and she didn�t.
�I don�t want a baby, Hunter! Can�t you understand that?�
Ten little words that ripped apart my world, and my heart. After that �conversation�, I couldn�t stand to look at her anymore, to touch her. I found myself questioning my motives for having stayed married so long with her.
I love her.
Yes, initially, it was only supposed to be a business partnership. But it was almost impossible to spend every day and every night with her for two years and not fall in love with her. Just like any other person, Stephanie has her flaws. Boy, does she ever!
But I still love her.
I hated the fact that despite being the angriest with her that I�ve ever been, I couldn�t hate her. I disliked what she had said to me, but I couldn�t dislike her. I sometimes wonder if it�s healthy to love someone so much.
And her �little� announcement on RAW� She wanted to renew our wedding vows? Did she really think that that would be enough to save our marriage? To soothe me? A bandaid solution if ever I�ve heard of one. Regardless of what she said on TV, I know that she truly doesn�t care what the fans think of her. She wanted to find out how I felt about her.
Maybe she doesn�t know me as well as she thinks she does. I didn�t say no because I didn�t love her. I said no because�because�because I felt guilty. I felt guilty for the way we had gotten married the first time, guilty that I hadn�t given her the proper wedding she deserves. And I was too embarrassed to admit it, so I said no.
But god�the bombshell. She was pregnant. Is pregnant.
�I don�t want a baby, Hunter! Can�t you understand that?�
Those words kept repeating in my head after the show, and so the next day I insisted that we confirm her pregnancy. Stephanie readily agreed, much to my surprise.
I should never have doubted her.