Unbelievable
You burden me with your questions
You'd have me tell no lies
The questions never stop. He wants my opinion on everything - his matches, about his opponents. And he want the truth, no matter how painful is to him. But whenever I tell him something painful or that he doesn't want to hear, he retreats into one of that black moods I hate so much. Especially when the answer he doesn't want to hear involves her.
You're always asking what it's all about
But don't listen to my replies
When it comes to her, that bright, perky blonde, that I find so irritating he wants every last detail. The expressions on her face, did she said anything to me, if so what did she say and how did she say it? If I didn't know better, I'd think he has a crush. Hell, I do know better and I still think he has a crush on her. I answer as best I can, but once again, if he doesn't want to hear it, he won't listen.
You say to me I don't talk enough
But when I do I'm a fool
Despite his rough appearence and demeanor, he's a very intelligent and deeply philisophical man. Sometimes it makes me feel extremely inferior, especially when I don't know what to say in response or don't understand what he's talking about. I must frustrate him, because I can't give him the kind of conversation he craves or be there for him the way I know she would be. It drives me crazy, because on the few occasions I speak my mind, he shoots me down in flames.
These times I've spent, I've realized
I'm going to shoot through
And leave you
I've thought about it long and hard and I've finally decided it's just not worth it. I'm not her and I can't pretend to be, not matter how much he means to me. I've got more self respect than this. Besides, I have a gut feeling that she's a lot more interested that she pretends to be. I'll just step aside and let her take my place, maybe she'll be able to deal with him better than I can.
The things, you say
Your heart to hearts just gives you away
The things, you say
You're unbelievable
You burden me with your problems
By telling me more about mine
He never tells me when something is wrong, he just tells me what's wrong with me. It's his way of dealing with his own insecurities, by focusing on those in others. I know him so well that I know he's not picking on me as such, the faults he finds with me are the exact same things he's insecure about. For the most part anyways.
I'm always so concerned
With the way you say
You've always got to stop
Thinking of us being one
Sometimes I think he's far too dependant on me. It's always good to feel needed, but this is just too much. I know he needs someone by his side and I'm glad that it's me. I doubt that anyone could put up with what I do or understands him as well as I do. We've got a connection that's for sure, but despite that we're two different people. I think he forgets that sometimes and I wonder if he means it or if it's justanother line to keep me at his side.
It's more than I'll ever know
But this time, I realize
I'm going to shoot through
And leave you
I can either go slightly nuts and keep my ego inflated or keep my sanity and hurt him deeply. It's a tough decision, but I have to what's best for me for once. He needs to learn how to look after himself and that won't happen as long as I'm around. Besides, there's someone else who cares about me. I know that to leave Raven for Spike might not be the best decision as far as my heart goes, but it's the choice that will be the best for my psyche in the long run. An equal relationship, with him looking after me as much as I look after him, no needing a Ph D in psychology to understand his basic personality traits. I don't know how Tori put up with it for so long - It's unbelievable what a short time with Raven can do to you.