Still feels like our first night together,
Feels like the first kiss,
We've spent so many nights together over the years and it always feels like the first one. As she presses against me, I feel that same combination of emotions - guilt, fear, excitement and contentment. I never know what to expect from her, but at the same time we can accurately predict each others next move. All I know is that every time we're together like this, I just feel.. complete.
It's gettin' better. baby, no one can better this.
Still holdin' on, you're still the one.
I wouldn't have thought it possible, but it gets better every time we're together. The guilt hasn't faded as she predicted - it's getting worse. I still feel like I'm betraying him, even though she left time over a year ago. I hold onto the knowledge that what they had is nothing compared to what I can give her. Not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually. It amazes me that the woman I need the most is the woman I should stay furthest away from.
First time our eyes met,
Same feelin' I get,
I remember that the first time I saw her, the first time we made eye contact, I felt like I'd been hit by a bolt of lightning. I glanced away, then back at her and she seemed similarly affected. I don't think she even noticed him. Normally, I instantly react on what my instincts are telling, but for some reason I hesitated... and publicly she became his.
Only feels much stronger,
Wanna love you longer.
You still turn the fire on.
Now, years down the track, I still lose my breath just by looking at her. It's not the same as it was before, it's stronger. For several years, in the every ones eyes they were the perfect couple. Then for whatever idiot reasons, he let her go and as usual, when he wasn't paying attention, she came to me. Unlike him, I don't want her at my side to show her off while it's convenient. I want her at my side forever.
CHORUS:
So if you're feelin' lonely, don't,
You're the only one I ever want.
I only wanna make it good,
Just because we can't be together, doesn't mean that she's alone. She doesn't have to worry about any others, because they all pale in comparison to her. He's a fool, to think that he can replace her with that string puppet. There's not a woman alive who could ever compare to her. She's ruined me for other women now - I couldn't settle for anyone that isn't her.
So if I love you a little more than I should
Please forgive me, I know not what I do,
Please forgive me, I can't stop lovin' you.
Maybe I shouldn't love her as much as I do. Just after she first got together with him, I said I didn't love her and that it was over. I lied, to her and myself because I could never stop loving her no matter what happened. I'm sorry for any trouble I've caused in her life, when it comes to her, I just can't keep from getting involved.
Don't deny me, this pain I'm goin' through,
Please forgive me if I need you like I do.
Please believe me every word I say is true,
Please forgive me, I can't stop lovin' you.
It still hurts, to see old clips of the two of them. It hurts to see old clips of her with any of those other three. I hope she's not feeling guilty, because we both know this can never go public. I'm sorry if I can sometimes be clingy, but I sometimes I just can't believe that she choose to be with me.
Still feels like our best times are together,
Feels like the first touch,
I've always enjoyed myself more when he's around, even before our affair began. Even if we were in a large group and didn't interact directly, I had more fun just knowing he was there. So much has happened since then and I still feel the same way. If he's at the arena, my night instantly becomes just that much better, even if I don't see him. When we finally get to be alone again and he reaches out for me, it's almost like the first time all over again.
Still gettin' closer, baby, can't get close enough,
Still holdin' on, still number one.
Everytime he pulls me into his arms, I have a sense of coming home. He knows me intimately, in every sense of the word, I'm closer to him than I have been to anyone else in my life and am likely to every be again. Including him. And every day and night we spend together, we learn something new about each other. I can't believe I've managed to hold into him for so long, that he's waited for me all this time.
I remember the smell of your skin,
I remember everything,
Together again and alone at last. He smiles at me and I can read the slight uncertainty in his eyes. It's been so long and god knows I've never given him any reason to hang around. Except for moments like this. Curled up against him while we watch TV, it's exactly the way I remember it. It might sound monotonous to some, but I wouldn't want it any other way.
I remember all your moves,
I remember you.
I remember the nights, ya know I still do
I beg him to tell me stories about 'the old days' when it was just us and him. He laughs and reminds me that I already know them, I was there. Of course I remember it all, how could I forget? It's imprinted on my brain, all the crazy stunts that the fans loved and the bosses hated. More importantly, I remember how much he loved playing to the crowd. Over this short space of time, my memories of the gang have already begun to fade.. but he stands out, loud and clear.
If the days were insane, then the nights were intense. Waiting for a moment to sneak away and be with him. It was hard back then, but got easier with time. At first I used to worry about being seen going into his room, but then realised that we were teammates and that nobody cared if I went and visited him alone. God, those first nights together...
CHORUS
So if you're feelin' lonely, don't,
You're the only one I ever want.
I only wanna make it good
I used to feel guilty about being on the road without him. It just wasn't the same. It wasn't that things were boring.. they just weren't as fun. At night, I'd think of him alone at home and just feel sick. I never realised how much I didn't want him until there was no other options. Sometimes, I'd talk to him on the phone and hear how down he was feeling... and all I wanted to do was go to him.
So if I love you a little more than I should
Please forgive me, I know not what I do,
Please forgive me, I can't stop lovin' you.
Don't deny me, this pain I'm goin' through,
Please forgive me if I need you like I do.
Please believe me every word I say is true,
Please forgive me, I can't stop lovin' you.
I guess we were doing the wrong thing by Hunter. His best friend and his woman, carrying on a long term affair behind his back. I loved Hunter, I really did, but I loved - love Shawn more. I know now that it must have been hell for him. Seeing me on the show with Hunter, knowing what he knew and wondering if the distance had gotten too much for me. I'm so sorry for hurting him the way I must have. When I left Hunter, I went straight to Shawn. We've still been sneaking around, I know that telling Hunter will kill him, depsite his marriage. I don't want to hurt him like that, which of course upsets Shawn. What he doesn't understand is Hunter's savage temper, and I'm only doing it because I love him so much.