| hours spent in a blur under the showerhead, curled up and broken. breaking fists against sterile tile that could do nothing but resist blankly. closed eyes, clenched jaw, not wanting to waste more on you. light smeared into patterns for days without sleep, the red thread weaving in and out a shirt i had not worn in years. fine-point sharpie, midnight vision, a seamless merging of shapes and shadows (i ended up drawing your face). music sinking into the skin like aloe with minutes melting under lyrical sedatives. the car rides never seemed long enough. the moments never felt real enough. your name etched into my skull a million fucking ways and i kept my mind alive to erase you for a million fucking hours. vomited your smiles and glass-blown words every second. took it all back in with a single tear. destroyed, disillusional, neurotic, manic. wanting to pull the walls apart and bring them crashing in to kill me (and the you that lives inside of me). this is what i call a broken heart. i wish it were your broken face. -mimi- |
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