Title: Until Proven Guilty (sequel to "Ignorance and Bliss")
Author: Cosmorific
Fandom: Demon Diary
Pairing: Eclipse x Raenef
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Borderline shota. Grown man. 15-year-old boy. Inappropriate touching. Don't say I didn't warn you.
Until Proven Guilty
He came to me last night in my dreams. I try not to remember, but the harder I try, the stronger it all comes back to me. It scares me. It excites me. It makes me feel... I don't know how it makes me feel.
He was standing there at the foot of my bed. There were candles lit all around it, and the sheets were black. I didn't remember changing them or lighting any candles, but I supposed he had done it for me. Eclipse is such a good teacher, always thinking of stuff like that.
"You called for me, my master?" he asked. His voice sounded... different. Lower. Kind of raspy, like he had a frog in his throat. He had this look in his eyes like he was hungry for something. I didn't know what.
I didn't think I'd called for him at all, but I didn't want to make him mad. I didn't know what to say. I felt my lips move, felt my voice say, "Come here." I felt like someone was tickling my stomach from the inside, but on the outside I smiled when I spoke to him, and held out my hand. Like I was inviting him.
Inviting him to do what?
He came over to the bed and sat down on it, facing me. I had thought he was wearing his usual robes, but he was only wearing his nightshirt and a hair tie. He reached up under the bottom of the hem and moved something. I thought he had an itch on his stomach or something.
I wanted to ask him why he had come. I knew I hadn't commanded him to. But somehow I knew I couldn't ask him that. Not because it would make him mad, but because somehow, even though I was having this dream, it wasn't mine.
Instead I said, "Do you know why you are here?"
"To fulfill your every desire, my master," he said. It sounded different from the way he usually said it. I think. Maybe I just never noticed before. Then he leaned in and whispered to me, "What is your desire tonight, master?"
"To submit to your will," I said.
WHAT? Who said that? I didn't say that. Why did I say that? Wasn't he trying to teach me to make it be the other way around? Was this a test? What was going on here?
"Now," he said, "Undress me."
My hands were shaking. There was only the one tie in the front, to keep the neck closed, but I was so nervous he finally had to help me untie it. Then he pulled the nightgown out from under his legs and raised his arms, and I pulled it up and off him. I folded it and put it on the floor then. I don't know how I knew to do that.
"The hair tie," he said. "Take that off too."
I did. That part wasn't too hard. I put it down on the floor with the nightshirt. Then Eclipse's hair was falling down all around his face and his chest and shoulders and covering all of him.
Well, not all of him.
What's wrong? I wanted to ask. Why is it sticking out like that? Did you sprain it or something? I don't know why, but somehow I knew not to ask that. I knew he didn't want me to talk just yet, and that he'd make me talk when he wanted me to. It was kind of a relief not to have to worry about what to say, but it was scary too, not knowing what I was going to say next.
"Touch me," he said. His voice sounded even raspier than before. For a minute I thought he might be sick, and wanted me to heal him with magic or something. I wanted to tell him to go see Chris so he could do some cleric stuff to make it better, but it was like the words stuck in my throat and wouldn't come out.
Touch you where? I thought. I didn't say it. I knew where. I didn't want to know, but I did. I didn't want to touch, not really, but part of me wanted to know what it felt like. I'd only touched mine before, and seen some of the other guys's when I was in with the thieves, and we'd all go take a pee or something. I wondered if his felt different than mine. I wondered if mine would be as big as his when I was his age. I wanted to ask him that. Instead, I said:
"But... but... I don't know-"
"I'll show you how," he snapped at me. At first I was scared and thought he was really mad, but then I saw he just looked impatient, like he had something to tell me that couldn't wait. His face was kind of red, and he was breathing heavy, like he'd just run down the hall to get here. I think he knew he had sounded mad, though, because when he spoke to me again, he sounded softer and a little more patient.
"Give me your hand, master."
I reached out my hand to him again and he grabbed me by the wrist. Not hard enough to hurt me, but firm enough that I knew not to try and break away. He pulled me close enough towards him that I wouldn't have to reach too far, and then he guided my hand down where he wanted it to be and showed me how he wanted me to touch him.
It felt - weird. Different. Kind of sweaty, but not like after you've been running. It was solid, like marble, but it felt all hot and alive and moveable, like you put marble in a hot oven and melted it enough that you could shift it around, until it was the shape that you wanted. I wondered what shape he wanted it to be.
It was wetter at the tip. Something was kind of oozing out of it, thicker than the sweat but still clear. He took my other hand and put my finger in the clear stuff, and then put my finger in my mouth so I could taste it. It was salty and kind of bitter, but I guess I didn't make a face or anything, because he smiled at me then.
"What a beautiful creature you are," he said. He reached out his hand to me and stroked my face, like he was petting a cat. I didn't even think to lean into his touch, but there I was doing just that. Just like my servant wanted me to. "I could throw you down on the floor and take you right here and now."
Take me where? I wanted to say. I knew he would roll his eyes at me and look disgusted, and I didn't want that. I wanted to keep feeling his sweaty skin rolling back and forth in my hand, wanted to feel my other hand where he put it now, cupping the crinkly skin underneath and working those the way he wanted me to. I wanted to know what he would make me do next. What would happen if I kept doing what he wanted. What he would do to me. Would he do anything to me? What kind of things?
"No, we won't do that yet," he said. He was kind of talking to me and kind of to himself, and he had this weird little smile on his face. "For now, you just keep touching me with those pretty hands, my lovely little Demon Lord."
He put his hand on mine again and made me grip harder, move faster. My wrist was starting to cramp up, but I knew he wanted me to keep going. I guess he noticed, because then he was standing up on his knees, so that he was pointing straight at my face, but I had to reach up instead of down now. It was more comfortable for my hands, but I didn't know what he wanted. I guess he must have taken my hair down the way I did his, because I could feel it loose around me too while I worked him hard, up and down, back and forth.
Eclipse started to move his hips back and forth and move harder into my hands. He was panting and making little grunting noises, and his face and neck were a darker shade of red now. He put his hands on my shoulders to steady himself and made a louder grunt, then a long groan. His hips made two big snapping motions then, and then this hot white sticky stuff came out and splashed onto my face, and just kept coming out until he pushed my hands away, still panting like a dog, and sat back down again, facing me.
The white stuff was dripping in my eyes and nose and into my mouth, and I couldn't help tasting some. It was salty, like chicken broth, but also kind of bitter, and it stung my eyes when it dripped into them. At first I was worried he'd make me eat it all myself, but then he took my face in his hands and licked it all off for me, the way a puppy's mom cleans its face. And then he put his lips on mine and kissed me so softly I wasn't sure he'd done it at first.
"You've made me feel so good, beautiful boy," he said to me. I couldn't say anything. I lowered my eyes, bowed my head, tried to thank him for his kind words without any of my own. "I think that deserves something in return, don't you? Would you like me to make you feel good, too, my sweet little Raenef?"
No. Yes. I don't know. "Yes, Eclipse."
"Good, good. Now, lie down on your back, my darling."
"On my...?"
"On. Your. Back," he barked at me. His face softened a bit and he added, "Please. Please, Master Raenef. I need this. I need you. Let me make you feel good. Will you let me do that? Will you permit me?"
"I permit you." I did? Why did this dream make me say that?
I laid back down on the pillow, my knees drawn up and feet flat on the bed. He took my knees and moved them apart until it almost started to hurt me, then took my feet and put them up over his shoulders. He took his hand then and put it between my legs, and started to touch me the same way I had just been touching him.
No! Wait! What? Eclipse, what are you doing?
I watched myself stand up and out, more to one side than straight out like him, and change to a darker color. I could feel the bottom of my stomach getting hot, like something was slowly coming to a boil in there. He rubbed his thumb over the tip and I gasped, made a noise like a puppy when you step on its tail, and tried to wriggle away from him.
No... no... too much... it's too much... I'm scared... Eclipse, Eclipse, it feels so - good...?
I squinched my eyes shut and hoped that would make this all go away. But then he took his hands off me and put them on my hips, holding me down, and I felt something hot and wet where his hands had been before, and then I couldn't hold it in anymore and screamed out loud.
"AAH! Eclipse, what are you - ANNH! AHH! It's not- I don't- I- AINNNH!!!"
Then the wet and warm left and I felt wet and cold, and I started to cry from the way it felt. I wanted more. I didn't want more. I wanted... I wanted...
"What do you want, my young master?" Eclipse said to me then, his voice deep and husky from the taste of me. "Tell me what you want me to do?"
What do I want? Oh God, I don't know! I don't want - I want you to - I -
"Don't... stop..." I could barely breathe. "Please don't stop..."
And then his mouth was on me again, hot and wet and sucking so hard I could feel the insides of his mouth on me, making the veins pop out, and I was seeing spots in front of my eyes and felt so dizzy I thought I was going to pass out, and then the warm feeling was getting lower and lower and concentrating more and more in one spot, and my body was moving without me even wanting it to, and then I felt this glorious little ripple and then a SPIKE and then I could feel something breaking apart in me and I let out a SCREAM, and then something even warmer was being sucked out into my servant's waiting mouth, again and again like it would never stop -
And then I was awake, and drenched in sweat, and my throat felt dry and hot and my nightshirt was cold and sticky. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, to feel virtuous or guilty. I didn't know whether what I had done was good or bad, whether he'd tell me not to worry about it or say I ought to be ashamed.
I felt dirty. I needed to take a bath. I took off my nightshirt, threw it in the hamper, washed myself off with water from the basin and put on a fresh one. But it didn't feel the same. Something had changed in me, and I didn't know what. And whether it was good or bad, I had crossed a point from which I could never turn back, and I would be forever changed.
I got back into bed and curled up in a ball, hoping for dreamless sleep.
END