Drafted

Ben

Okay...heres an idea for all...

Wed Oct 3 06:02:16 2001

I don't know if it has been done before on the board, but who is up for a make it up as you go along TS fan fic?

Reply to this post with what you think will come next, only typeing one paragraph and letting someone else take it on from there and see where we get up to?

Good idea? Bad idea?

Anyway, here is the starting bit..."which I have just made up and have not thought about in any great detail"

Baloo paced back and forth across the office, waiting for the post to arrive. Kit, Molly and Miz Cunningham were sitting on the stairs watching him, their heads following him like spectators at a tennis match.

"Calm down Papa bear, it will get here soon" Kit tried to be reasuring.

"Calm down...calm down?" Baloo nearly yelled at him, then jumped as a letter was pushed through the letter box.

Running over to it, Baloo realised it was the one he had been expecting. He turned to the others.

"You know this is probably the most important letter I have ever opened?"

As he opened it and started to read the others tried to read his reaction...

fredb

Or....

Thu Oct 4 10:42:47 2001

Baloo read the letter, wanting the words to form in some other way:

To:Baloo Bear aka:Baloo Von Bruenwald

C/o Higher for Hire

Cape Suzette

Order to report for Armed Forces Physical Examination

You are hereby directed to present yourself for Armed Forces Physical Examination to the local Draft board at the location listed on this form, at..7:58am.,on the..15th., of..October,..1937.

It was signed by a name, that Baloo wasn't able to make out, and gave an address close by.

Kit asked, "What's the letter about?"

Baloo answered, "I think I been Drafted!"

Rage

Drafted?!

Thu Oct 4 14:18:47 2001

"Let me see that!" Rebecca rips the letter away from Baloo and reads it. Stunned, she drops the letter, "Let's look at it this way, you are now worth more than the Sea Duck."

"Is that suppost to make me feel better?" Baloo groaned.

Lizzy

reactions to being drafted

Thu Oct 4 19:05:13 2001

Baloo slowly slumped his way over to the his favorite chair, and sat down and leaned back with a tired sigh. He just sat there, breathing quietly, and looking vacantly at the floor. Several thoughts were running through his head, not the least of which was 'what if something happens to me? What if I get injured, or, *gulp*, worse? What would happen to Becky and Molly, and Kit. Poor Little Britches. What if I don't come back, I'm the only family that kid's really got. What am I going to do?'

Molly did not understanding what was going on, but she fully comprehended that something terrible had just occured.

Uncharacteristically, she didn't whine or begin to ask questions, she simply walked over to Baloo, climbed into his lap, laid her head on his chest, and began to sob quietly into the fabric of his old yellow flight shirt.

Gidget

Continuing the Baloo Gets Drafted story

Thu Oct 4 19:18:43 2001

New:

Rebecca heard her sniffling and quickly pulled her out of Baloo's lap, but she was too late to control the damage. A stringy clothesline of yellow snot hung wetly from Molly's nostril to the big pilot's shirt. Baloo was too distraught to notice.

Rebecca said, "It'll be all right, pumpkin. Let's get you, um...cleaned up."

In a moment, the golden mucus evaporated and dried into almost the same shade as Baloo's shirt.

Rebecca thought, oh, this is awful. That stain will never come out!

Bearcat

Continue to (ahem) draft Baloo...

Thu Oct 4 23:15:07 2001

Rebecca said, "It'll be all right, pumpkin. Let's get you, um...cleaned up."

In a moment, the golden mucus evaporated and dried into almost the same shade as Baloo's shirt.

Rebecca thought, oh, this is awful. That stain will never come out!

Baloo looked on as Molly was led to the bathroom upstairs. "Ah...Nuts! I hate to see her cry." Baloo looked back at the draft notice. "Report? Physical?"

He got up from his chair and started to pace. He didn't know what to think. "I can't believe it. Me, of all people," he said to out loud. "Me with my size fourteen feet."

"Any your size sixty waist line," Rebecca added. She was on the upstairs landing.

"I've put Molly down for a while," Rebecca said as she started back down the stairs. "Oh Baloo how in the world did they pick you. I thought the age limit for draftee's was thirty seven? I mean, you're not a day over..."

"Thirty five." Baloo tossed the letter down on Rebecca's desk. "I'm thirty five Becky. Now if I was two years older..."

"Or maybe two hundred pounds heavier," she interjected.

"Hey, I'm in my prime. I don't weigh more than...than.... Hey, I wonder how much I do weigh?," he asked looking down at his gut.

"Well, on the last cargo run the port authority of Spango Pango said the Sea Duck was over weight by twelve hundred pounds... Until you got out of the cockpit."

"Very funny. But this ain't a laugh'n matter Becky. I'm be'n drafted. I could get... I mean, I could...". His voice trailed off as the true meaning of the letter began to sink deeper into his mind.

"Oh Baloo," Rebecca said as she started to place a comforting arm around his broad shoulders, "maybe your foot size will make you 4-F."

Ben

Yes he has been drafted into

Fri Oct 5 09:26:51 2001

the revolutionary army of Usland communists.

He is to fight along side other revolutionary comrades in the armed struggle for the people's dictotship of the poloratiate.

Pandora

Continuing

Fri Oct 5 11:52:04 2001

..."Geez! I didn't even know there was a war going on! How can this be? There must be some way to get out of it..." Baloo paused to wipe the cold sweat from his furrowed brow. "Wait! I have to report in 2 weeks right?"

"What are you gettin at Baloo..." Rebecca asked as she closed the door so no one could hear what they were about to say. You never know what hair brained scheme he might come up with and she didn't want anyone to witness the planning of an act that might be illegal...

"If I gain enough weight, they can't take me!" He exclaimed feverishly.

"You know...that might actually be crazy enough to work..." Rebecca said only half believing that she had just agreed that Baloo might have a good idea for once. "So how are you going to gain that much weight in 2 weeks?"

Rage

Weighing the problem

Fri Oct 5 14:32:15 2001

***

"A hundred pounds should be enough," Baloo chuckled.

Rebecca tried to picture Baloo a hundred pounds heavier and began laughing uncontrollably. "We are gonna have to consider getting a bigger weardrobe. The tailors will have to create a new size just for you."

Baloo took the keys to the Sea Duck from his pocket and headed for the door, "I'm going to Louie's!"

Pandora

And then...

Sat Oct 6 13:54:35 2001

Later, at Louie's...

"Man, I can't believe you downed 12 krakatoa specials! Where do you put it?" Louie inquired as he spit in a glass to clean it.

Baloo looked down and patted his stomach. "I just hope that's where it stays. Hey Louie, make me another one will ya?"

Louie just shook his head in disbelief as he went off to make another. Kit was sitting quietly beside Baloo wondering what had gotten into his ol' papa bear. Baloo still hadn't informed him of the news. But just as Kit was about to ask Baloo what the deal was, he heard a familiar voice begin to croon in the background. Both he and Baloo turned their heads in unison. Karnage?

"All by myself...i am not wanting to be...being all by myself...for another period of time, yes-no?" Karnage was singing Celine Dion's "All By Myself" whole-heartedly.

Kit raised an eyebrow as he glaced over at Baloo. Baloo was wearing an equally puzzled expression but soon lost interest in the spectacle once his next meal was brought to him. Peculiar!

"Hey Karnie!" called Kit. "That song won't be written until the mid 1980's. This is 1937!" And then the occupants of Louie's got to witness something no one in Cape Suzette history had ever witnessed; Karnage blushed! He had not know that Kit and Baloo were here and he would rather have died then have them discover his hobby: Karaoke! How was he suppose to be feared and respected while singing love songs?!

"Ermm...I wrote that song myself! But I will be continuing with another song if you don't mind!" Karnage spat as he tried to maintain his last strand of dignity. He proceeded to sing My Darling Clementine. By this point in time Kit was rolling on the ground in hysterics as Karnage pretended not to notice. Happening to look up for an instant, Kit caught a look at Baloo who only seemed to take notice of the plate that was before him. What could be eating him? Kit wondered...

Rage

Doubled over in hysterics

Sun Oct 7 12:19:31 2001

***

"Kit, don't be so hard on him." Baloo mumbled, digging into krakatoa special number fourteen. "Besides if he wants to sing songs that don't exist yet, let him."

Karnage, tired of singing, sat down next to Baloo and ordered a krakatoa special. To everyone surprise, except Louie, he managed to eat it faster than Baloo. "Looks like someone else got drafted." Karnage muttered before digging into his second krakatoa.

Spitting out a mouthfull of ice cream, "YOU got drafted, too!!"

Pandora

A hefty situation...

Mon Oct 8 19:21:46 2001

"I don't know how they even found me...I live in a plane for God's sake!" Karnage elevated before beginning to choke on a spoonfull of his ice cream. Baloo gave him a hearty whack on the back to make the food go down. "I see that you have the same idea, yes-no?" Karnage stated nodding at Baloo's krakatoa special.

"Heh-heh, yeah" Baloo agreed as he nervously rubbed the back of his neck. "Umm, say Karnie? You wouldn't want to, umm, join forces or something would you?" Baloo mumbled. Karnage raised an eyebrow and cocked his head slightly. "It would only be a one time thing, you understand! Neither of us would have to go to war and we could go our seperate ways, you know," Baloo stammered. He gripped his pilots cap firmly in both hands in tense anticipation of a response from his nemesis.

Karanage wore an expression of intense interest and intrigue. "My bulbous bear, you have a deal. One time only!"

"One time only!" Baloo agreed and they toasted. "Louie! Bring us your finest tub of lard!" Louie winced and reluctantly brought them the bucket. What does one charge for a bucket of lard, he wondered. "You first" Baloo said with a wave of his hand.

"Oh no, I simply could not...you." Karnage said.

"Together" Baloo compromised. They closed their eyes and took huge spoonfuls. No sooner had the lard hit their pallettes than their tongues retreated. "Blech!" they choked in unison. They looked at each other briefly before shrugging their shoulders and resuming their gluttony.

Kit, who had watched this whole scene in disgust, had to leave the room to take in all that had happened and escape the whole lard scene.

He stepped outside of Louie's and sat down against the building. Drafted? Teaming up with Karnage? Karnage doing Karaoke *shudders a la Sideshow Bob from the Simpsons*? Had the world gone mad? Somewhere between the time he had woken up and now, his world as he knew it had ceased to be. I was as if someone had shaken everything up like a snowglobe. What if Baloo had to go to war? What if he could't gain the weight in time? He peeked around the corner inside the restaurant again and sighed before sitting against the wall again. Just then a shadow fell over his crumpled figure. He waited but the shadow did not retreat. "What do you want" Kit asked in an obviously agitated tone. He looked up and his eyes widened. "Its...its...you!"

Rage

Ending the insanity

Thu Oct 11 11:02:48 2001

***

"Of course it's me. Who did you think I was - Louise Lamour?"

Kit stepped back, but bumped into a second shodowy figure. He looked around and spotted a total of eight figures dressed in black robes with hoods. Each one removed their hood, revealing their identity. Ben, fredb, Rage, Lizzy, Gidget, Bearcat, Pandora, and Joseph. Kit shook his head in disbelief, "Why would you do this?"

"What can we say, we were bored." Ben laughed

"How did you manage to give Karnage a draft notice?"

"Kit, even you know where Pirate Island was. The trick was to look like a postal worker." Rage pointed out.

"So when are you gonna break the news that this was a prank?"

Pandora peeked around the corner, "Now would be a good time."

"Yes, but who will tell them?" Rage questioned.

Pandora

Means to an end...

Thu Oct 11 11:20:13 2001

Pandora yells "CUT! That's a rap folks. Same time, same place, next episode."

"Woo!" sighs Kit as he takes off his costume to reveal a short, old bald man. "That suit was getting pretty hot." He lit a cigar and walked out with the Kit head under one arm.

Baloo took off his suit to revael that...well that he looked exactly the same as his costume. "Why do they even make me wear this things?" Baloo asked himself as he walked off the stage.

Some zookeepers showed up. "Okay you two, back to the zoo with both of youse!" He used a cattle prod to zap Karnage and Louie on their backs as he slipped a leash over Louie's head and shoved Karnage into his cage.

The lights on the set were extinguished and everyone left the lot.

The End

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