wow. i didn't even realize that it's been a year since i began my humble existence on the www. well. a lot has changed during the past year. mmm. not really. no, well yes they have. but it may not *seem* so obvious from the outside. believe you me, inside i'm all a-changed. but certain things still remain the same. i like conan o'brian a lot.
so last night i went over to jen's for a bit. she was a tad tipsy. we lounged in lawn chairs in her moth infested backyard with large glasses of wine, and yammered on and on about the upcoming "second annual oslislo bbq". it was great fun last summer- not that i would know because i dared to drink three beers and passed out before most of the guests arrived. we decided that *not* drinking *before* the guests arrive is critical in hosting a successful party. and lately i've been watching a lot of martha stewart's in martha's kitchen so have learned *all* about hosting the perfect party and making the most delectable meal for different occasions.
hmm. last night jen said that she wanted to be a baboon. we were watching the discovery channel. then all of a sudden, with a voice straight from the bottom of her poeksy heart she whined, "oooooh, i wanna be a babooon..."
07.09.02
v.v.v.v.v. bad day. only had 2 hours of sleep last night. a whopping 6 hours of sleep in the past two days made me look like a million bucks this morning. made note to self that i must must must on my next day off, buy a bottle of brandy and have it handy for those sleepless nights.
went to work. work was long. work was boring. i was having hateful feelings toward work and co-workers. went to lunch and found that my mother had packed a tupperware with rice, side dishes, and a COCKTAIL FORK. the kind you use for fruit when you have guests. the kind that you might be able to use to attach screws to the hinges of your eyeglasses. managed to eat half of lunch and eventually bought a muffin.
when i was walking to my car after work, i noticed that it was starting to rain. but i was so excited that work was finally over, that i looked up at the ominous sky and (don�t laugh), smiled. and if my life were a musical, i�d put my hands out and shrug my shoulders, then break out in a song and dance. but my life is not a musical, and if it could be a musical, then i would want it to be like the sound of music and not about an asian girl who works her entire life at the mall and eats her korean lunches with a cocktail fork.
two minutes after i left the parking lot, the rain turned into a typhoon. cars pulled over to the side to wait it out but my camry and me, we jes kept goin. then at this one area right near the exit to rt.24e, i drove over a puddle and my car stalled. after making several attempts to turn the engine back on, i noticed someone�s car had stopped behind mine. a burly guy got out and walked over to me, �hey, your car not starting?� (you know in case i was just parked between a major freeway exit and a busy street during rush hour for personal reasons). �i work for the aaa. let me give it a try.� i got out of the car and stood in the rain as he tried to start the car, and thought what good luck that he works for aaa (not to be confused with aa- alcoholics anonymous). after a whlie he turned to me and told me to get into the back seat and i felt a twinge of fear and confusion because maybe he was trying to pretend to help me but actually planned to kidnap me and sell me into prostitution. �don�t you want to get out of the rain?�
�na, it�s okay.�
the engine made some funny noises then started smelling like burnt engine so the guy stopped and told me to call a tow truck. and then you know what happened? i�ll tell you. as soon as he said �tow truck�, i saw one pull up behind the aaa guy�s car. a young guy in flannel got out of the truck and walked over to us. aaa and tow truck happened to know each other. in no time at all, the camry was secured to the tow truck. the aaa guy left and i was now in the hands of the tow truck guy. i got into the passenger seat of the truck, which is kind of like trying to climb onto the second tier of a bunk bed using one leg, pulling up with one arm, and attempting to make it all as graceful and balanced as possible so as to avoid flopping the upper body onto the seat first, then wiggling the rest of the way up. we set out onto rt.24 east, which was pretty much bumper to bumper. the tow truck guy told me that he just came out to see if there were any accidents in the bad weather and happened to see my car first. how lucky i am, i thought. but then he began talking to his walkie talkie, �where is it? i don�t see it. oh wait, okay i�ll go over there and see if they need help.� then he turned to me and asked, �do you mind if we stop by over there? they look like they might need help.�
�oh, ah, yes. sure.�
with my dead car in tow, he made his way to the left lane of 24e and just made a u-turn onto 24w. a lexus was sitting on the side of a small hill and a mitsubishi sportscar was damaged on the side. the two people involved, a middle aged indian man and a young white girl, were standing outside, huddled together. tow truck guy pulled up behind them and put on a light reflector vest, commonly seen on crossing guards and night joggers. he went up to them, probably offered his body shop�s services, lit one of those bright, smoky light things, and chatted with them for a while. in the mean time, i sat in the tow truck wondering how many more stops we were going to make before he dropped me off. i called jen and she found all this amusing of course. she said it would be so funny if we kept collecting people on the way and we�d all have to sit together in the front, on the look out for others in need. what the heck. that would really suck.
he dropped me and the car off at home within the hour, but i had to fork over $114 in cash for the towing and ride. ugh. got home to a v. unhelpful dad who thought i should have waited there until the wires dried or for someone to come pick me up. this really irritated me. first of all, a stalling car is v.unnerving. and in the middle of a busy road, by the freeway, is life threatening. i apologized for not being able to push the car to the curb in a thunderstorm, past the oncoming traffic. how silly of me. next time i�ll channel my panic into manpower and save a hundred bucks.
got home and passed out. v.v.tired. jen and hen called to ask if i wanted to watch a movie but i said no. and now i feel bad. have not properly spent time with henrietta since she got here. it�s work i tell you. try standing for eight hours straight, day after day. the only thing that sounds really appealing is laying down. so friends, let us hang out somewhere where we can lay down. and maybe sleep for a couple of hours.
this week is pretty tight and sat. is my only day off but am really torn as to what i ought to do because a)should do something with hen and jen b)should visit sarah and jane�s new place if can�t even help with the moving in c)should see cindy who will be in jersey. also need to do something about this sleeping issue. and the indigestion issue b/c i don�t want to take any more of that ground up charcoal stuff that my mother keeps feeding me. mabies i�ll just get that bottle of sleep and take it from there.
07.12.02
so i've been looking for a job. yesterday and today i looked, i did. just thought you ought to know.
i'm watching a tv advert for that musical urinEtown and the whole commercial is just shots of one old person after another, bundled up in scarves and overcoats, saying, "urinetown". then there's this one old man who says, "the first time my wife told me the name of it, i wasn't so sure. but geraldine saw it and she said it was very goood." (repeat "urinetown" by myriad of senior citizens).
07.28.02
it's 3:30am and i would like to sleep. last night i had the same problem. jennis, are you up right now as well?
today i finally told jen's dad that he sounded like john malkovich. *just* like john malkovich. if my dad sounded like john malkovich, i would perfect my malkovich impersonation. and when we go to a bar downtown, and gross guys hit on us, instead of telling them that i'm british, i'd just say that i'm john malkovich.
07.29.02
why is it that when i check my email, i see adverts that say, "see your baby at six months!" above a painted picture of a pink fetus at, what i assume to be six months, with a long, coiled, umbilical cord attatched to it?
the swede is back in sweden. the time just goes. we were all waiting for her to come here, and now it's all over. it's like when i order chinese food and i'm really hungry while waiting for it. and then i always think, "in about an hour's time, i will have eaten the food and be really full." and then after the actual hour and consumption of food, i'd think, "and here i am. all done with the food." it wierds me out. because then i think to me little old self, "in six years i'll be thirty and filthy rich." then when i turn thirty and i'm not wealthy and cosmopolitan, but married to a portly man with four kids, i'll be confused. "where is my lower east side classic-six? am i living in... westfield? are my children... empirically ugly?" and maybe that's when i slide into a midlife crisis.
is there a sign on my head that reads, "PLEASE STALK ME"?
