"Marron."
"Shhh," he stepped forward, slipping his arms around the taller man's waist, once again marveling at the comfort that came from such a simple gesture. If he could have this he wouldn't need anything else ever again.
Gateau inhaled the scent of Marron's hair, previously identified as fresh lilacs in the spring, only nicer. Unable to resist, he caught those thin lips in a passionate kiss. Pressing a hand to Marron's back brought them even closer, deepening the kiss and gaining a small moan from the boy, undoing the last string of Gateau's unraveling control.
Never breaking contact, he situated Marron so that he was standing backwards against the bed. Marron collasped his knees, falling to the mattress and taking Gateau with him. As the need for oxygen forced them apart Gateau ran a hand down his love's ivory face, slightly flushed with what had occured and ideas of what was to be.
"Beautiful," he whispered and was rewarded with a smile.
"You always say that."
"And its always true," he went through the routine, mind concentrating on unfastening the complicated claspss of the ornate collar blocking his progress. Exsposing a satisfactory amount of skin, he consented to taste it. Marron threw back his head, enjoying the ministrations with no thought of the mark they might leave as evidence.
"Plea--," Marron's words were cut off as the door slammed open to admit an irate Carrot. Gateau quickly scrambled to his feet, noticing the evil gleam in the eyes of the intruder. The jig was up. Marron lay stunned as Carrot approached him, pulling him forcibly to his feet and pushing him against the wall hard enough to knock the wind from his lungs.
"How could you Marron?!" he yelled. Gateau stepped forward ready to protect. "Don't move." His grip on his little brother tightened. He threw the mage away from the wall, causing him to land on the floor in a heap. Carrot advanced and he tried to pull away, for the first time in his life he was afraid of his sibling.
"Ni--Niisan."
Carrot stood breathing heavily, far from calm. Gateau knelt to embrace Marron's shoulders from behind.
"Get away from him! How dare you pervert my brother." This was no game, no idle threats.
Marron pushed back his dissheveled hair trying to gain perspective on the situation. The two things he treasured most, he would lose one if not both. He had to try.
"Niisan, I love him."
"Love?" Carrot sneered, "no, he's manipulated you and you let him. What would mother say? Marron, are you my brother or...or that bastard's screw toy?"
"But--"
"That's not--"
Perfectly solemn, he cut them off. "Get away from him right now. come with me and we'll forget this whole thing."
Forget? Dismiss the last few weeks as if nothing happened? Abandon the man who had taken his virginity and shown him love like no one else? No.
"I won't."
"Fine. If you stay with him then you're no brother of mine."
"Niisan."
Carrot didn't look back as he walked away.
"NIISAN!" Marron called so piteously it nearly brok Gateau's heart, but deep inside he was proud to love this man. Standing, Marron looked at him. He was on the verge of crying.
"Gateau, I love you and now that I have decided, I will be here for you. But I need a little time to," a involuntary sob, "to pull myslef together." With that lie told, for the truth would not be wise at present, he fled the room.
~*~
Tears blurred his vision as he locked the door. Trapped. He was caught in hell. Pulling off his robes, Marron knelt beside the bed. Reaching between the mattress and the frame, a place of hiding known to anyone who has kept a diary, he pulled out not a book but a small jeweled dagger. His own secret.
Naked, feeling vulnerable, he knelt on the hard floor. Taking the dagger, he ran its blade across his right thigh and again across his left arm. The wounds wouls heal, they always did in time, suicide was not the goal. Two more slashes on his legs, deeper this time, but only as small gasp escaped him. He had done this too many times to mess up. He knew exactly what to do, and the realization scared him. One final cut, diagonal on his chest. As he watched the blood run down his pale skin he savored the physical pain, a momentary distraction from the pain in his heart.
~tbc~
