Cortney2123: hey, whats ur info bout, your not trying to do anything stupid are you?
CHELS dog6301989: it's about cutting.
Cortney2123: cutting what?
CHELS dog6301989: my wrist.
Cortney2123: for what?
CHELS dog6301989: no reason. just am. i think i have pain, but i don't. i just want pain in my life. i don't cut though. i might soon.
CHELS dog6301989: in wilson's room yesterday i had a pencil in my hand and i was pushing it into my skin. nothing like a cut. just leaving behind a mark. i did it in math too.
Cortney2123: are u stupid, seriously, why would someone want pain in there life? then u will die ya know and we dont want that!!
CHELS dog6301989: yeah well maybe i want to die. i don't feel like i have a purpose in life. even though i do have one, i don't see it. i hate myself greatly.
Cortney2123: you can die when your 99 but not now there is still ur life ahead of you
CHELS dog6301989: ha. i suppose.
CHELS dog6301989: hang on i have to scan something i wrote today (about cutting)
Cortney2123: ok
Cortney2123: what are u doing, now>
Auto response from CHELS dog6301989: i'll brb. stay on if i was talking to you.
Cortney2123: ?
CHELS dog6301989: nothing. i'm not cutting.
Cortney2123: ok
CHELS dog6301989: if that's what your thinking
CHELS dog6301989: i haven't 'truly' cut myself.
Cortney2123: yea
Cortney2123: good then dont
CHELS dog6301989: i might sometime though. i know i shouldn't, but i want too.
Cortney2123: why do u want to
Cortney2123: why dont u go see a counsler or something, does ur mom know that u want to do this?
CHELS dog6301989: because 'they' all do it. ..stupid reason i know.. i just want to try it. so i can say 'i've cut myself before'
Cortney2123: yeah, well who is they?
CHELS dog6301989: hell no i won't go and see a counselor. my mom? never. she knows my friends cut themselves, but not me. i don't cut though.
CHELS dog6301989: don't tell anyone. ok?
Cortney2123: ok i wont
Cortney2123: well its just in ur info
CHELS dog6301989: no don't tell anyone who these people are. the ones that cut
Cortney2123: o ok i wont
Cortney2123: let me guess,
Cortney2123: first
CHELS dog6301989: ok
Cortney2123: natalie
CHELS dog6301989: conlon?
CHELS dog6301989: nah.
Cortney2123: o um. do they go to boone
CHELS dog6301989: yeah
Cortney2123: mary foster?
CHELS dog6301989: well 3 do. 1 of them doesn't cut as much
CHELS dog6301989: yeah.
Cortney2123: andrew cobb
CHELS dog6301989: and her cousin em. em cuts a lot. like all the time. she has like 150 cuts or something. she sees a counselor
CHELS dog6301989: yeah.
Cortney2123: mary does?
CHELS dog6301989: yeah.
CHELS dog6301989: jason mick used to. i don't know if he does anymore.
Cortney2123: o yeah, i knew about that 1
CHELS dog6301989: everyone does.
CHELS dog6301989: how'd you guess mary and andrew?
Cortney2123: i dont know really, just naming ppl that u hang with
CHELS dog6301989: oh yeah. quite obvious
Cortney2123: yeah
Cortney2123: well dont be a poser about it, if they do that then let them dont be a follower!!
CHELS dog6301989: i'm already obsessed with 'cutting' even though i've never done it.
CHELS dog6301989: ha. yeah.
Cortney2123: dont do that, thats really dumb seriously
CHELS dog6301989: well i must be dumb for doing it.
Cortney2123: well u wont be if u dont do it
CHELS dog6301989: mary said it is addictive and she's right. i pushed the pencil against my skin yesterday and today making a red mark and for some reason i need to keep doing it. not
constently, but like quite a few tiems a day.
Cortney2123: well dont do it no more just put the weapons down! haha i felt like a cop!
Cortney2123: haha
CHELS dog6301989: haha
CHELS dog6301989: yeah i was like "JASON TAKE THE PENCIL AWAY FROM ME!"
Cortney2123: ha
CHELS dog6301989: wait, why are you so concerned? we're not the greatest of friends so i don't see why you would care.
Cortney2123: becuz its just stupid that u would do something like that, but i dont want no one dying becuz its just not right and i know were are
not the "greatest" friends but even ppl u dont hang with are still concered
CHELS dog6301989: i'm not going to die. i'm not going to committ suicide. i'll admit that yes, i have wanted to kill myself. but i'm not strong enough to do it. i don't really want to leave this
world. i like it here. i plan on staying here until i do pass away.
Cortney2123: ok then but u could get poisened
CHELS dog6301989: poison myself?
Cortney2123: with the led or ink
CHELS dog6301989: oh no. you can't.
Cortney2123: yeah, u can if it gets in ur blood stream
CHELS dog6301989: it's not true 'led'. it won't give me led poisoning. it's grafite
Cortney2123: how do u know
CHELS dog6301989: my parents. it used to be real led, but not it's not
Cortney2123: so the led that we use to write isnt really "led"
CHELS dog6301989: i haevn't seen any blood on my wrist yet so i don't have anything to worry about. if i do get ink poisoning its from me drawing bracelets on my wrist 24/7
CHELS dog6301989: nah.
Cortney2123: why do u decerate ur sell, how bout u just go get a tattoo!
CHELS dog6301989: i just asked my mom. she said that they haven't put real led in pencils for years.
CHELS dog6301989: I WISH!
CHELS dog6301989: that would kick so much ass
Cortney2123: then go do it!
Cortney2123: with ur friends
CHELS dog6301989: haha yeah right. i don't want a permanent tattoo. then i couldn't change the designs.
Cortney2123: yeah, just go there ova and ova again then u could!
Cortney2123: ha
CHELS dog6301989: EW!
Cortney2123: ha
CHELS dog6301989: that would be so disgusting. not really, but still.
Cortney2123: just make a new one with "PAINT" (haha) on ur other had!
Cortney2123: hand*
CHELS dog6301989: finger PAINT! woohoo
Cortney2123: well its better than pen
CHELS dog6301989: yeah well finger paint will get on my FINGERS!
CHELS dog6301989: :-)
Cortney2123: yeah, then u can make more designs on ur fingers :-D
CHELS dog6301989: true.
Cortney2123: ha
CHELS dog6301989: that would be quite insane.
Cortney2123: y
CHELS dog6301989: uh because the chelsdog said it was. der.
Cortney2123: yeah, well the "chelsdog" doesnt no what she talking about!
