TV, Movie, and Song Lines

Mulder: One more anal-probing gyro-pyro levitating ectoplasm alien anti-matter story and I'm going to take out my gun and shoot somebody.

Mulder: Hey Scully, do you believe in the afterlife?
Scully: I'd settle for a life in this one.

Scully: Oh my God, Mulder... It smells like... I think its bile.
Mulder: Is there any way I can quickly get it off my finger without betraying my cool exterior?

Leo: A man's walking down the street. There's a hole, and he falls in. It has steep sides, and he can't get out. A doctor walks by. The man says, "Hey, doctor, can you help me out?" The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down, and walks on. A priest walks by. The man calls, "Father, I'm in this hole, can you help me?" The priest writes a prayer, throws it down, and moves on. Then his friend walks by. The man calls, "Hey, Joe, it's me, can you help me?" His friend jumps down in the hole with him. The man says, "What're you, stupid? Now we're both down here!" His friend says, "Yeah, but I've been here before, and I know the way out."

Leo: Act as if ye have faith and faith shall be given to you. Put it another way, fake it till you make it.

Sam: For we came out of the cave, and we looked over the hill, and we saw fire. And we crossed the ocean, and we pioneered the West, and we took to the sky. The history of man is hung on the timeline of exploration, and this is what's next.

 Josh: I want to be a comfort to my friends in tragedy and I want to laugh with them in triumph, and in between, I just want to be able to look them in the eye.

 Bartlet: A long flight across the night. You know why late flights are good? Because we cease to be earth bound and burdened with practicality. Ask the impertinent question, talk about the ideas that nobody has thought about yet. Put it another way.
Sam: Be poets.

Josh: All I'm saying is, if you were in an accident, I wouldn't stop to get a beer.
Donna: If you were in an accident, I wouldn't stop for red lights.

Josh: I’ve been subpoenaed.
Mrs. Landingham: I’m sorry, dear. Would you like a cookie?

Leo: True or false, if I were to stand on high ground in Key West with a good pair of binoculars I'd be as informed as I am right now.
Josh: That's true.
Leo: The intelligence budget's money's well spent, isn't it?

Sam: It's my day of jubilee.
Mallory: I despise you and everything you stand for.
Sam: All right, my day was a little bit better a few seconds ago but that's all right.

Leo: All right, shut the hell up, everybody. I've fired more people than you before breakfast.

Josh: I'm on hold. I'm on hold. I'm in some hellish hold world of holding.

Leo: He rode his bicycle into a tree, CJ, what do you want me to say- ‘The President, while riding a bicycle on his vacation in Jackson Hole, came to a sudden arboreal stop’?

Leo: Andrew Jackson had a two-ton block of cheese...
Josh: And a Wheat Thin the size of Lake Tahoe.

Margaret:  What does the foam do, exactly?
Leo:  On the runway?
Margaret:  Yeah.
Leo:  It's flame retardant.  They're worried about fire.
Margaret:  But it's not impact retardant though, is it?  I mean, the plane would still -- coming out of the sky at some velocity -- have to land on concrete.

Will:  Well, if you have the rear wheels you can try a hard landing where you come down hard on the back wheels in an effort to whack the front into place.
CJ:  To whack it into place?
Will:  Yeah.
CJ:  I'm so happy I didn't have that information.
Will:  If you hit it wrong, the plane breaks in half.

Dr. Dalton Millgate (Hector Elizondo):  Great achievement has no road map. The X-Ray is pretty good. So, is penicillin, and neither were discovered with a practical objective in mind. When the electron was discovered in 1897, it was useless. Now, we have an entire world run by electronics. Beethoven and Mozart never studied the classics; they invented them.

The Little Rascals-

Alfalfa: Then the clouds opened up and God said, "I hate you, Alfalfa!"

The American President-

Lewis: Who're we calling, sir?
President Andrew Shepherd: I'm calling the organization of the United Brotherhood of It's None of Your Damn Business, Lewis. I'll be with you in a second.

President Andrew Shepherd: Lewis, however much coffee you drink in the morning, I want you to reduce it by half.
Lewis Rothschild: I don't drink coffee, sir.
President Andrew Shepherd: Then hit yourself over the head with a baseball bat, would you please?

Lewis: Mood swings? Nineteen post-graduate degrees in mathematics, and your best explanation for going from a 63 to a 46 percent approval rating in five weeks is mood swings?
Leon: Well, I could explain it better, but I'd need charts, and graphs, and an easel.

Lucy (the First Daughter) : If you were a dork you should say you're sorry. Girls like that.

Lucy Shepherd: Do you see it as part of your job to torture me?
President Andrew Shepherd: No, just one of the perks.

Robin: I think the important thing is not to make it look like we're panicking.
President Andrew Shepherd: See, and I think the important thing is actually not to BE panicking.

Robin McCall: It's Christmas.
Lewis Rothschild: It's Christmas?
Leon Kodak: Yeah. You didn't get the memo?

President Andrew Shepherd: She didn't say anything about me?
A.J.: No, but I could always pass her a note before study hall.

[Playing pool]
A.J.: Nice shot, Mr. President.
President Andrew Shepherd: Nice shot, Mr. President? You won't even call me by my name when we're playing pool?
A.J.: I will not do it playing pool, I will not do it in a school. I do not like green eggs and ham, I do not like them, Sam I Am.

President Andrew Shepherd: Let me see if I got this. The third story on the news tonight was that someone I didn't know thirteen years ago when I wasn't president participated in a demonstration where no laws were being broken in protest of something that so many people were against, it doesn't exist anymore. Just out of curiosity, what was the fourth story?

David: We should do some prep work. You wanna order in?
Sydney Ellen Wade: Uh, I can't. I'm having dinner at the White House. So let's start early tomorrow morning, say 7:30?
David: Okay. I'm having lunch at the Kremlin, so we'll have to, you know, start even earlier than that.
Sydney Ellen Wade: Good night, David.
David: In order for me to catch the morning plane to Moscow.
Sydney Ellen Wade: Good night, David!

[Watching Bob Rumson on television]
Bob Rumson: Last night, the cost of those liberal programs was raised to include the blood of 22 American soldiers. Now, Mr. Shepherd's read a lot of books, but it doesn't take a Harvard degree to see this one coming a mile down the road.
President Andrew Shepherd: I went to Stanford, you blowhole!

[President Shepherd watches his opponent's campaign ad.]
President Andrew Shepherd: Wait, wait, here comes my favorite part.
Bob Rumson: My name is Bob Rumson, and I'm running for President!
President Andrew Shepherd: Sure glad he cleared that up, 'cause those people were about to buy some Amway products!

President Andrew Shepherd: My name is Andrew Shepherd and I AM the President.

The Rugrats-

Angelica: "I got sponserbilities now."
Phil: "Sponserbileries?"
Angelica: "That means I am not allowed to have fun anymore for the rest of my life."

Evolution-

Ira Kane: Ira Kane, head of the science department, Glen Canyon Community College.
Harry Block: Harry Block, geology professor, Glen Canyon Community College.
Wayne Grey: Wayne Grey. I took some chemistry in high school.

[Harry has just had an alien removed rectally]
Dr. Allison Reed: Can we get you anything?
Harry Block: Ice cream...I want some ice cream.
Dr. Allison Reed: Ice cream, ok, what flavor do you want?
Harry Block: It doesn't matter. It's for my ass.

[They see a dying monster coughing something up.]
Wayne Grey: Whoa! It's like a big lugie!
[The 'egg' breaks, and another monster comes out.]
Harry Block: Mozaltah! It's a boy!

Top Gun-

Maverick: I feel the need...
Maverick, Goose: ...the need for speed!

Maverick: She's lost that loving feeling.
Goose: No, no she hasn't.
Maverick: Oh, yes she has.  Goose, she's lost it.
Goose: I hate it when she does that.

Goose: No. No, Mav, this is not a good idea.
Maverick: Sorry Goose, but it's time to buzz a tower.

Goose: The defense department regrets to inform you that your sons are dead because they were stupid.

Merlin: What are you doing? You're slowing down, you're slowing down!
Maverick: I'm bringing him in closer, Merlin.
Merlin: You're gonna do WHAT?!

Ferris Bueller's Day Off-

Ferris:  Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.

A League of Their Own-

Dottie Hinson: It just got too hard.
Jimmy Dugan: It's supposed to be hard! If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard... is what makes it great!

Jimmy Dugan: Evelyn, could you come here for a second? Which team do you play for?
Evelyn Gardner: Well, I'm a Peach.
Jimmy Dugan: Well I was just wonderin' why you would throw home when we got a two-run lead! You let the tying run get on second base and we lost the lead because of you! Start using your head. That's the lump that's three feet above your ass!
[Evelyn starts to cry.]
Jimmy Dugan: Are you crying? Are you crying? ARE YOU CRYING? There's no crying, there's no crying in baseball! Rogers Hornsby was my manager, and he called me a talking pile of pigshit! And that was when my parents drove all the way down from Michigan to see me play the game! And did I cry? NO! NO! And do you know why?
Evelyn Gardner: No, no, no.
Jimmy Dugan: Because there's no crying in baseball!

Field of Dreams

Shoeless Joe Jackson: Is this heaven?
Ray Kinsella: No, it's Iowa.

Ray Kinsella: Where'd they come from?
Shoeless Joe Jackson: Where did WE come from? You wouldn't believe how many guys wanted to play here! We had to beat 'em off with a stick!
Archie Graham: Hey, that's Smokey Joe Wood! And Mel Ott! And Gil Hodges!
Shoeless Joe Jackson: Ty Cobb wanted to play. None of could stand the son-of-a-bitch when we were alive, so we told him to stick it!

Shoeless Joe Jackson: The first two were high and tight, so where do you think the next one's gonna be?
Archie Graham: Well, either low and away, or in my ear.
Shoeless Joe Jackson: He's not gonna wanna load the bases, so look low and away.
Archie Graham: Right.
Shoeless Joe Jackson: But watch out for in your ear.
 

John Kinsella: Is this heaven?
Ray Kinsella: It's Iowa.
John Kinsella: Iowa? I could have sworn this was heaven.
[John starts to walk away]
Ray Kinsella: Is there a heaven?
John Kinsella: Oh yeah. It's the place where dreams come true.
[Ray looks around, seeing his wife playing with their daughter on the porch.]
Ray Kinsella: Maybe this is heaven.

The Sandlot

"The Babe": Heroes get remembered, but legends never die. Follow your heart, kid, and you'll never go wrong.

"The Babe": Everybody gets one chance to do something great. Most people never take the chance, either because they're too scared, or they don't recognize it when it spits on their shoes.

Benny: Man, this is baseball. You gotta stop thinking. Just have fun.

Fried Green Tomatoes

Ninny Threadgoode: You reminded me about what the most important thing in life is. You know what I think it is?... Friends. Best friends.

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

Mr. Turkentine: I've just decided to switch our Friday schedule to Monday, which means that the test we take each Friday on what we learned during the week will now take place on Monday before we've learned it. But since today is Tuesday, it doesn't matter in the slightest.

Willy Wonka: Invention, my dear friends, is 93% perspiration, 6% electricity, 4% evaporation, and 2% butterscotch ripple.
Mrs. Teevee: That's 105 percent!

Willy Wonka: A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.

Willy Wonka: So much time and so little to do. Wait a minute. Strike that. Reverse it.

Willy Wonka: And Charlie: don't forget what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he'd ever wished for.
Charlie Bucket: What happened?
Willy Wonka: He lived happily ever after.

The Dance by Garth Brooks-

Our lives are better left to chance
I could've missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance

I'm a Survivor by Reba McEntire-

My roots are planted in the past
And though my life is changin' fast
Who I am is who I want to be
[......]
With gentle hands and the heart of a fighter
I'm a survivor