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Heavenly Mirage Edits
So there he was, standing before my eyes, but seeming to be so far away from me.
His brown eyes bore a hole into my heart. They were seeking for some sign of forgiveness. A spark lit on his face, seeming to find what he was searching for.
I recognized his eyes that once gave me a sense of comfort and made me feel loved. I�m not sure that they still did anymore.
He reached for me, and I yearned to take his hand and forgive him. I shrugged his touch away, remembering the unforgivable things he had done to me.
He could sense that I was unsure. My crystal blue eyes were replaced with insecure and cloudy gray ones. My heart was beating faster than before and I as barely aware I was still breathing.
His hand reached forward once more with the confidence he�s always possessed. It was that same confidence that drove me crazy. It was also the same confidence that made me feel loved.
I pushed his strong grasp away with more force now. It hurt me, but everything seemed to be more painful lately. You could say that I was getting use to it more everyday.
�You�re nothing without me, Jessica. You�re nothing at all.� His tone was now harsher than ever. I struggled to find the words to answer. He was right, my heart belonged to him.
He dug his face into his hands. �I�m nothing without you.�
I looked up, clearly seeing the defeat in his eyes. Defeat made me stronger, but inside made me cry. He was defeated, but it looked as if our relationship was yet to lose.
�Say something, Jess,� He commanded with authority. I didn�t speak a word. Authority didn�t mean that he owned me because he even knew he didn�t.
For a nano-second, I thought it would work or some crazy and hopeful thought like that. I could remember how it felt to be wrapped in his warm, comforting arms. I ached for the security he once provided me.
I could taste the resentful tears falling down my cheeks. I cried because all that was now left was bittersweet memories.
�I�m sorry, Jessica. What can I do to make it up to you? Can I do anything to prove I�m sorry?� Chris looked pleadingly in my eyes. He was searching for an answer I wasn�t able to give.
I glanced down to the floor, unhappily. He already knew my answer. Sometimes you just can�t forgive a guy who can�t make you happy enough. Eye contact was the one thing I couldn�t make.
�Jessica,� he somewhat whined.
�Chris,� I mimicked. The first word I actually spoke in a long time, and it was his name. �Don�t do this, Chris. You know it won�t work out.� I stared up at the ceiling, pulling my hand to my forehead.
Now he looked more crushed than before. He threw his hands down, simply. �Okay then. I guess I�ll be seeing you around.� His voice trembled with every word spoken.
I didn�t move. I wanted to so badly. I couldn�t move because I was numb. I somehow heard the loud creaking of my wooden floors as he made his way out. I wanted to follow him, and forgive and forget all the wrong he had done.
You just can�t forget when people hurt you that way. He told me that he loved me or that he would never hurt me. I guess that people make mistakes, or that hurt was only little damage in this unkind world. I can�t forgive someone who�s hurt me, no matter how much I tried.
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