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There were these 3 fwends, one was from Texas, one was from Virginia, and one was from California.� Well, 3 of them found a lamp and thought it was magical, so they rubbed it.�� When they rubbed it a gennie popped out. She said, "i'll gib each of you one wish, so becareful of what you want."� She waited for a while and asked the fuy from Virginia what he wanted. He said, "Well, when I was small I lived in a farm and raised animals, so I want a farm with animals."� The genie worked her magic and poof there was a farm with animals like he wanted.� Then the genie asked the guy from Texas what he wanted for his wish.� He answered, "I love everyone and everything in Texas, so I want you to make a border around Texas so that no one can get in and no one can get out."� The genie was like, "Are you sure?"� He said, "yeah".�� So there was a border around Texas so that no one can get in and no one can get out.� The genie asked the guy from California what he wanted.� The guy from California said, " Hmmm.... no one can get in and no one can get out, huh?� Well, I want you to flood Texas."

There's this guy, he was walking down the street and tripped over a lamp.� He picked it up and rubbed it.� Out came a genie.� She told him, "you have 3 wishes, but whatever you wish for yer mother-in-law will get twice as much."� The guy thought about what he wanted.� Then he snapped his finger and said, "I want a million dollars."� The gennie was surprised and asked, "Are you sure, because yer mother-in-law will get twice as much."� He answered, "Yah, I'm sure".� So poof, he had his one million dollars and his mother-in-law had 2.� "For my second wish I want the biggest mansion in the world."� The gennie asked, "Are you sure, because yer mother-in-law will get twice as much." He answered, "Yep"� So he got his mansion.� "You have one wish left so becareful about what you wish for."� He thought for a while and said, "I want you to beat me half to death."

This guy walks into a bar and two steps in , he realizes it's a gay bar. "But what the heck" he says, "I really want a drink."� The gay waiter apporaches, he says to the customer, "What's the name of yer penis?"� The customer says, "Look, I'm not into any of that.� All I want is a drink." The gay waiher says "I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell me the name of yer penis. Mine , for instance is called Nike, for the slogan "Just Do It"� That guy down at the end of the bar calls his Snickers, because "It really Satisfies."� The customer looks dumbfounded so the bartender tells him he will give him a second to think it over.� So the customer asks the man sitting to his left, who is sipping on a beer, "Hey bud, What's the name of yer penis?" The man looks back and says with a smile, "TIMEX"� The thirsty customer asks, "Why Timex?"� The fella prouldy replies, "Cause it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin!"� A little shaken, the customer turns to the fella on his right, who is sipping a fruity Margarita and says, "So , what do you call yer penis?"� The man turns to him and proundly exclaims "FORD, because Quality is Job 1." Then he adds, "Have you driven a Ford, lately?"� Even more shaken, the customer has to think for a moment before he comes up with a name for his penis.� Finally, he turns to the bartender and exclaims, "The name of my penis is Secret.� Now give me my beer."� The bartender begins to pour the customer a beer, but with a puzzled look he asks, "Why secret?"� The customer says, "Because it's STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!"

Jack is one horny guy and is not sure what to do about it.� He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a five dollar bill. Jack walks down the street to the local brothel and knocks on the door.� The� madam opens the door an asks Jack what she can do for him.� "I'm realy horny but I only have $5.� What can you do for me?"�� Jack asks the madam.� She looks over this fellow and tells Jack, "Don't worry we can take care of you. No problem."� She leads Jack into a room where in the opposite corner is a chicken.� Jack thinks about his a second and figures it can't be that bad.� He gives the madam the $5 and closes the door behind her.� With the eagerness of a young teenager he quickly undresses.� Once naked, Jack wastes no time and starts to fuck the chicken.� As soon as Jack develops a rhythm he starts to enjoy himself a great deal.� He and the chicken really go at it for a while until all that built up frustration is finally released.� Jack can't remember when he has had such a pleasureable experience.� One week later, and horny again, Jack saves up $10.� Being a satisfied customer he goes back to the same madam and asks what she can do for him for $10.� "Well for $10 we have a special show",� the madam replies.� She leads him into a different room where there are several other people sitting on benches. "Sit back and enjoy the show, Jack", the madam tells Jack.� Jack gives the money to the madam and takes the seat on one of the benches.� Soon after, the lights dim and blinds open revealing another room on the other side of a two way mirror where two women begin to undress each other.� Jack is very impressed.�� Clearly these women are unaware anyone is watching as they begin to make love to each other passionately.� Aparently there is nothing they won't do to each other. Jack once again feels like he is getting his money's worth.� He turns to the person beside him and says, "This is a pretty good show for ten bucks eh?!!"� The guy turns to Jack and says, "That's nothing..... last week we saw a guy fuck a chicken."

A Horny GuY

In a Gay Bar

3 Wishes

Twice As Much

Jokes

Main

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