| I'll give you a REAL ass kicking!-Friday, December 26th, 2003 TV sucks. I hate TV. I just fucking hate it. ESPECIALLY 'Reality TV.' How the fuck did this get named, anyway? This is not what happens in real life! How often do people go on islands and vote each other off? Never! That is not real! That is a shit-fucked lie! I was inspired to write this by a good reality show. I was watching it and started thinking, 'why can't ALL reality shows be like this? This is entertaining, unlike that other so called real shit!' Let's take a look at some of the worst reality TV shows. I mean they're all bad. I'm talking about the worst ones. Survivor-The one that started it all. This is a huge load of shit. I tried to watch it when it was popular, but it was just too fucking stupid. American Idol-This one is dumb. If these people actually had talent, they wouldn't need to go on a damned game show! First that lesbian wins, then that fat guy. I heard there wasn't going to be another, which brought me temporary relief. I thought it was over. Until I went to walmart and saw the biggest crock of shit ever. The American Idol video game! Now, you and up to three friends can compete to see who is the biggest asshole! The most intelligent guy on that show is the asshole judge everyone hates. The Average Joe/For Love or Money/All those other ones that have people competing for love-Shit. Shit shit shit. It's all shit. None of these relationships and stuff are going to last. If you were actually capable of having love, you wouldn't need to go on a damn show and win it! The Real World/Road Rules/Rich Girls/Anything else shown on Moron Television-The Real World. Wow. What an accurate title. According to the census, college kids that hate each other are the most common household types in the country. Next to careless parenst with asshole prep kids that watch these shows, at least. Anything not listed above or below-It's all shit. There is too much shit to be listed. Reality tv is the world's septic tank. It's all fucking stupid. If you watch any reality tv shows, I think you need to go meet with the ancestor of one of the guys in the shows listed below. Here are the only good reality tv shows. Monster Garage-THIS is good. Jesse James is the great great great grandson (or something like that) of the notorious evil cowboy guy with the same name. And he's just as badass. He takes no shit at all. Anyone who watches reality tv should meet this tough bastard. I hope he does to you what he did to the Grimm Ripper. American Choppers-And all those spinoffs. Mike is cool. Paul Jr. is awesome. Paul Sr. is fucking hillarious. I think the AC Four (Mike, Paul, Paul, and Vinnie) should team up with Jesse James and build a fleet of tank motorcycles, then sell them to all the intelligent people in the world and send them after the reality tv fans. Fear Factor-They risk their lives for the chance of getting money. How much more fun can you get? Cheating death on national television! You don't even need the cash! Hell, you even get to meet the host of the Man Show! I have the reality tv part finished. I'll finish the tv rant later. If you enjoy any shitty reality tv, then you should get on a motorcycle of which Jesse James has taken out the breaks and then go on Fear Factor and drive it off a cliff with no safety harness. Except Jess, because she's great and I don't want her to die. Note: Everything expressed here is my opinion only. It should NOT be taken seriously. Reproduction and/or distribution of this, as well as everything else on this site, without permission from me makes you an asshole. |