Riverdale High School's choir Solo Concert was in full attendance. There was barely any room for the choir to sit in, so they had to wait in the choir room for their turn.
Rachel couldn't, though. She was performing before Treble Choir came on, so she told Charlotte, Alyssa and Jeni to come and watch her, just so that she'd have some kind of moral support. As she waited in the wings, she hoped to God that Ethan was there. Her song was not only a solo; it was a message to him. Lately, he had been breaking a lot of their dates. And even though he did remember their one month anniversary (he gave her a gold bracelet with her name inscribed on it), it didn't seem whole-heartedly. Rachel cleared her head as Mr. Kerner introduced her.
"And now, ladies and gentlemen, we have an incredible young woman performing. Rachel has decided to drop choir classes in order for her to pursue her education, but has been so dedicated that she has come in at least once a day to learn little parts of her music. If you're wondering what choir she belongs to, she is in Treble Choir, which you will see later. But now, here is Rachel, singing Mandy Moore's 'Quit Breaking My Heart.'"
The intro for the song started and Rachel shakily stepped out, looking for Ethan. When she saw that he wasn't there, her emotions put more feeling into the song.
You were my first slow dance,
thought that we had a chance
but together was too hard for you
Hanging out with your friends,
and I accept these things
All I need is for you to be true
I know you care, but it's just not fair
When you're not around, I want you there
And you need me to stop breaking my heart
Quit breaking my heart
It's tearing apart
All I need is for you to be true
Quit breaking my heart
It's tearing us apart
Baby, (oh yeah)
quit breaking my heart
~*~
Jacob's breath caught as he watched Rachel perform. The dress� it reminded him so much of that night, by the fountain� she looked as beautiful as ever. But he saw the sadness in her eyes. He knew this song was really coming from her heart, and it made him sad. He wished that he could be there to comfort her, because that stupid jerk Ethan certainly didn't deserve her. Jacob looked to the stage again to watch Rachel.
Baby, I don't feel this way 'bout everyone
Something about you, boy,
nothing seems to be quite like this
Holding your hand, touching my face,
standing here, waiting for our first kiss
I know you care, but it's just not fair
When you're not around, I want you there
And you need me to stop breaking my heart
Quit breaking my heart
It's tearing apart
All I need is for you to be true
Quit breaking my heart (quit breaking my heart)
It's tearing us apart (tearing us apart)
Baby, (oh yeah)
quit breaking my heart
As Rachel did her ad-libs, she couldn't help but wonder where Ethan was. He said he'd be here� where is he?
Quit breaking my heart, heart, heart
I know you care, but it's just not fair
When you're not around, I want you there
You need to stop, you need to stop, (oh) breaking my heart
Baby, oh yeah, quit breaking my heart
Quit breaking my heart
It's tearing apart
All I need is for you to be true
Quit breaking my heart
It's tearing apart
All I need is for you to be true�
quit breaking my heart
~*~
By the time she had gotten off-stage, changed into her choir dress, and made her way back down to the audience, Rachel was in tears. He promised he'd be here� he promised! That was the only thought going through her head right now. Blindly, she made her way up the aisle, and ran smack into Jacob.
"Rachel, hey, hey, look at me." He saw the pain in her eyes and her tear-streaked face (no mascara running though!) and instinctively gave her a hug. "It's okay. I know you wanted Ethan to be here."
Jacob could feel her shoulders heaving as she sobbed against him. "Jake� why�" was all she could sputter, she was sobbing so hard.
"Why what, Rachel?" Jacob asked, stroking her long, curled, dark hair.
"Why does� why does Ethan� why does he do this to me? What� what have I done to him?"
"I don't know, Rach, I don't know. But everything will work out. I promise."
Rachel pulled away and said, "Jacob, I just noticed how thin you're getting. It's scaring me. I don't want to lose you too."
"You're not going to lose me, Rachel. I'll always be here for you."
This caused Rachel to smile slightly. "Thank you. Sometimes I wonder� sometimes I wonder if I should have chosen you instead," she murmured.
Jacob was quiet.
"I'm sorry, Jake, I didn't mean to bring it up."
"That's okay. All that matters to me is that you're happy, okay? Cheer up, Rach. You still have to go onstage with Treble Choir."
"Oh, that's right. Well, then, I better get going. I'll see you later, okay?"
"Okay, Rachel." Jacob smiled at her, and Rachel noticed something disturbing. Sure, his smile was still electrifying (his best feature, Rachel thought), and it still brought her joy, but his teeth� it looked like they were wearing down. It wasn't anything too noticeable, but knowing Jacob's smile the way she did, it troubled her.
"Good luck!" Rachel called over her shoulder, as she couldn't see the Mane Attraction perform.
Little did she know that Ethan was there, and he had seen it all.
~*~
Rachel punched out Ethan's number once again, as she had been doing regularly these days� he never called her anymore. When he picked up, there was a certain echo to his call. "Hey, Ethan."
"Hey. Sorry, I just got home, no one's here. Anyway, what's up? Are you okay?"
"Um� yeah. I was just calling to say hi and to see how you're doing."
"You're okay, right?"
"Yes� I already told you that."
"Yeah. Look, I just got home, so yeah."
"I know. You told me that too." Rachel sighed. "Ethan, what's up? Why aren't you saying my name, and why are you repeating everything?"
(Say my name, say my name
If no one is around you say, "Baby, I love you,"
if you ain't running games
Say my name, say my name
You acting kinda shady, ain't calling me baby,
why the sudden change?
I know you say you never assume a thing
Something's going down, that's the way it seems
Shouldn't be the reason why you're acting strange
if nobody's holding you back from me
'Cause I know how you usually do,
but you're saying everything to me times two
Why can't you just tell the truth?
If somebody's there, then tell me who
"What? Oh. I didn't repeat anything, did I? Are you okay?"
Rachel rolled her eyes. "You just did."
"Whatever. Listen, sorry, but I have to go. I'll call you back, okay?"
"Sure." Before he hung up, she was positive she heard another voice in the house. But Ethan said he was home alone� She shook her head.
What is up with this?
Tell the truth, who you with?
How would you like it if I came over with my clique?
Don't try to change it now and say you gotta bounce
when two seconds ago, said you just got in the house
It's hard to believe that you are at home by yourself,
when I just heard the voice, heard the voice of someone else
Just this question: why do you feel you gotta lie?
You're caught up in your game when you cannot say my name)
~*~
"Hello?" Rachel asked into the phone.
"Hey, what's up, baby? I'm sorry� Listen, I'm going to be late tonight, so don't stay up and wait for me, okay?" Ethan informed her.
"Where are you?" she asked.
"Wait, say that again?" Ethan's voice was getting more and more distant.
"Hello?" she asked, again, as she was losing him.
"You're really dropping out. I think my battery must be low. Listen, if you can hear me, we're going to a place nearby, all right? Gotta go." The phone went dead, with Rachel staring at her phone. Somehow, it sounded eerily familiar, and she had a feeling that this call would mean something very bad.
~*~
"What the HELL do you think you're doing?" Serena lashed out. "How could you do this to Rachel?"
Ethan looked sheepishly at Serena as Laurel broke away. "Ethan� who's Rachel?"
"My girlfriend."
"You never told me you had a girlfriend," she replied.
"Obviously," Serena interjected. "God, Ethan, I thought you had changed. But now�" she looked at Laurel, with her rumpled clothes, her tousled hair� "I can see I was damn wrong."
"Serena, look, please don't tell Rachel."
She scoffed, "Not tell Rachel? Please. As if you could get any lower. The truth is, Ethan, that I'm going to tell her everything."
"No, don't do that. Let me be the one who does it."
"At least you have some shred of decency left in you. Fine. But I want to know exactly how long this has been going on, how this s*** happened, everything." Serena was so angry, she started cussing Ethan out.
"You want to know? Fine. I'll tell you." And Ethan told Serena the story of the call�
Let me tell you about the call that changed my destiny
Me and my boys went out, just to end up in misery
Was about to go home when there she was, standing in front of me
She said, "Hi� I got a little place nearby� Wanna go?"
I should have said, "No, someone's waiting for me"
But I called my girl up and said�
"Listen, baby, I'm sorry
Just wanna tell you, don't worry
I will be late, don't stay up and wait for me"
I said, "Again, you're dropping out, my battery is low
Just so you know,
we're going to a place nearby, gotta go"
"So this Laurel girl asks if you want to go back to her place right as you guys leave?"
"Yes! And I know I should have told her about Rachel, but I called Rachel instead and told her that I'd be late. See, we talk online all the time at this time."
Serena nodded. "Okay, go on."
The deed's been done, nothing's been won
I can't take it back, what's done is done
One of her friends found out that she wasn't my only one
And it eats me from inside that she's not by my side
just because I made that call that night:
"Listen, baby, I'm sorry
Just wanna tell you, don't worry
I will be late, don't stay up and wait for me"
I said, "Again, you're dropping out, my battery is low
Just so you know,
we're going to a place nearby, gotta go"
Listen, baby, I'm sorry� ("Hello?")
�gotta go
Let me tell you about the call that changed my destiny
Me and my boys went out, just to end up in misery
Was about to go home when there she was, standing in front of me
She said, "Hi� I got a little place nearby"
Gotta go�
"Listen, baby, I'm sorry
Just wanna tell you, don't worry
I will be late, don't stay up and wait for me"
I said, "Again, you're dropping out, my battery is low
Just so you know,
we're going to a place nearby,
we're going to a place nearby, gotta go"
*click*
Serena shook her head disapprovingly. "I can't believe you."
"I know, I know, it was stupid, especially with my ex�"
"That's the part that kills me! It's your ex! You guys went out in sixth grade!" Serena exclaimed. "You promised Rachel that you'd never do this to her. God, I don't want to be there when you tell her. It was hard enough for her to give up Jacob."
"Hold on right there. She hasn't given Jacob up. Not completely, anyway," Ethan argued.
"What the hell do you mean by that?"
"Well, I saw her at her choir concert, and I saw her perform, but I think she didn't see me, because she was crying when she came offstage, and then she ran into Jacob and he gave her a hug."
"So? You used to give her hugs all the time when you guys were still friends, remember?" Serena pointed out. That was one thing she could never forget: Rachel expecting a hug from Ethan.
"That's true, but they were nothing like the hug Jacob gave Rachel."
"She was crying, for God's sake! Crying because she thought you weren't there." Serena paused and then said, "Does she know that you were there?"
"I don't think so," Ethan said, slowly.
Serena threw her hands up. "Forget this. You don't love her, Ethan. You may say you do, but you don't. You didn't tell her after the concert that you were there?"
"I didn't want to interrupt her 'moment' with Jacob," he replied, sarcastically.
"You could have at least told her."
"I was going to-"
"That's enough! Enough excuses. Now you tell her, or else I will."
"Okay, okay! God! Don't you think that I feel bad enough already, Serena?"
"I don't know, Ethan. I honestly don't know."
~*~
The AV/Business Academy was holding its sophomore meeting, discussing their next big project: the Lip Sync. Kyle suggested that maybe they could invite one sophomore not in the academy to perform solo, with whatever act he or she wanted to do. Ethan agreed to this almost immediately, because he had an idea of who to choose.
"We could nominate people and then have the whole sophomore part of the Academy vote," Karen suggested.
"Yeah, that's a good idea. Okay, any nominations?" Mrs. Ferdinand asked.
"Rachel," Ethan said.
"Okay, who else?"
"Morgan."
"Skylar."
"Freddy."
"Anyone else?" Marina asked, as she wrote the suggestions down.
"No, I think that's it," Kyle declared. "That's a good number of people to vote for."
~*~
After Ethan had left her there, Rachel stood in front of her sixth period, waiting for him to come back. She needed to get home soon�
"Rachel Rachel Rachel!!!!"
Serena, Stacey, Megan, Rachelle, Jade, McKayla, Malia, Marissa and Ethan, in one huge group, headed toward where Rachel was standing. Ethan approached her first and gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek. She smiled. "What was that for?"
"Congratulations," was all he said.
Puzzledly, Rachel looked to her friends. They all looked at Serena, who looked like she was going to burst from excitement. She told Rachel, "You won!"
"Won what?" Then she remembered. They had all told her that Ethan had nominated her for the non-Academy sophomore solo spot in the Lip-Sync. "Oh, my gosh! Really? You guys! You rock!" She hugged them all. "Thank you! You have no idea how much fun I'm planning to have with that." She winked. "When is it?"
"You have a week, give or take a few days, to practice. But I'm sure you'll be able to have it down pat by then," McKayla told her.
"You know she will," Malia added.
Rachel smiled. "Thanks, guys. It really means a lot for me to be able to perform. You know how much I love it."
"Yeah, we do," Stacey reiterated. "What are you going to sing?"
"I'm not sure, something by Britney Spears, maybe."
Ethan perked up at this. "Britney? Really?"
"Yes, really," Rachel replied. She smiled. "I know how much you love Brit. And believe me, this performance will be one you'll be sure to remember."
"I'll hold you to that," Ethan replied, taking her hand. "Listen, guys, thanks for coming with me to tell Rachel."
"No problem," Jade said.
"Hey, guys, I better get going," Rachel said, breaking the silence that followed. "It's getting late."
"Okay, Rach," Rachelle said. "We'll see you later, okay?"
"Cool."
"Hey, Rachel, I'll walk you home," Ethan offered.
"Okay." As everyone walked in their separate ways, Ethan and Rachel walked toward the direction of home. "Listen, Rachel, I have something to tell you."
"Really? What is it?"
"I can't tell you yet, not now, okay?" He seemed in a hurry to get home, and as soon as they had crossed the street safely, and as soon as they were away from everyone, Ethan started to break the news to her. "Look, Rachel, I haven't been totally honest with you."
She cocked her head. "Really. And why is that?"
"Because I knew that when you found out why, you'd be hurt, and angry, and I wouldn't blame you for it."
Rachel narrowed her eyes. "Ethan, tell me what it is. Don't try to stall."
"Okay." He exhaled and said, "It goes something like this. It's� it's someone else."
"Another girl?" Rachel asked, in a high, shrill voice. "You're cheating on me?"
"Well�"
"You are, aren't you?"
"Rachel, I'm sorry. Really."
"Yeah, like hell you are." She started to storm off, but Ethan caught her arm. "Look at me, Rachel."
Reluctantly, she looked into his deep blue eyes, which right now were full of regret. "I really am sorry. I hope you believe me."
She didn't say anything.
"Rachel?"
"How long has this been going on?" she asked, quietly.
"About a week."
She only nodded. "And who is it? It better not be anyone I know."
"I don't think you know her. Do you, by any chance, know someone named Laurel?"
Rachel shook her head. "No, thank goodness. At least you weren't low enough to cheat on me with someone I knew." She stopped about three-quarters of the way to the corner and then said, in nearly a whisper, "You promised me, Ethan. You promised me that you would never do this to me."
For the first time, Ethan remembered the night of Mid-Winter. "I did, didn't I?"
"Yes. And you broke your promise." Rachel shook her head. "God, I believed you. I bet you said the exact same thing to that Laurel chick that you did to me."
"Look, it wasn't her fault."
"Oh, I know. I know it wasn't her fault that you are such a flirt and that you can't stick to one girl at a time. I'm not that mad at her. I'm more upset at you. Look, before you try anything, let me just say that I don't want to talk to you right now. We're not broken up-yet, anyway-until I talk to you again, okay? As soon as I walk across the street, don't talk to me until I talk to you one last time. Got it?"
Ethan only nodded. "Rachel, I really am sorry about all of this."
"Save it, Ethan." With that, she crossed the street hastily, not wanting Ethan to see the tears of pain in her eyes. Her perfect world had come crashing down.
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