Exterminate

 

Disclaimer: Legacy of Kain belongs to Edios and Crystal Dynamics not me. I am making £0.00 out of this fic, it is written purely because I have a burning need to create.  

 

I do however own Light. I am sorry . . .so very, very sorry.

 

Rating: PG-13

 

Part: One of One

 

Set: . . . um . . . yesterday ^_^

 

Authoress note:  I watch far too much television.

 

Dedicated: Banik and Thetman as they are quiet possibly the only people who will understand this monstrosity of a fic.  I’m sorry guys. Really I am.

 

Italics = flashbacks

 

* \/ * /\ * \/ * /\ *

{Sanctuary of the clans}

 

The sanctuary is quiet.

 

Vorador has returned to his mansion having had enough of the total chaos usually present at the Sanctuary, Janos has retreated to his Aerie for much the same reason as his childe. Raziel has launched a huge project of trying in vain to repair his clan territory, despite the lack of clan. Light has *apparently* wandered off somewhere into the mountains, looking for a new take out that delivers.

 

The main chamber of the sanctuary is almost empty, the sole occupant lies curled on the throne. Kain has his back to the entrance, lying on his side on the throne. His legs over an arm-rest, his head cushioned on his arms on the other arm rest.

 

“EXTERMINATE!!!!” a voice suddenly screams, Kain as expected jerks upright in alarm and fall off the throne. Light has fits of giggles on the floor beside him.

 

“I hate you” Kain breaths. That was the third time today. Stupid feline had been stalking around Nosgoth yelling ‘Exterminate’ in a stupid voice pretending to be a darlec all damn day.

 

“Oh come on” Light wipes a tear from her eye “admit it you freaked out, you’re scared of darlecs!”

 

“That stupid machine on that show?” Kain asked and raised an eyebrow “I think not”

 

“Moebius will be” Light grinned Kain frowned “he’s by the abyss now” she paused for dramatic effect “I have a cunning plan”

 

“Alright Baldric” Kain smirked, anything was worth putting up with if Moebius suffered

 

 

* * *

 

{Dark Eden half an hour later}

 

“You do not look well” Azimuth looked up at Moebius as he entered the chamber; cursing as she pricked her finger with the large needle she is currently using to repair her cloak. Damn vampires always breaking things. She half believed the only reason she was allowed to exist in this time was for Kain’s amusement, briefly she wondered if that was why Moebius was here also.

 

“I am . . . less than pleased” Moebius mumbles looking over the dimension guardian’s shoulder. Azimuth put her cloak down and looked to Moebius; he had been sweating and looked as if he’d just gotten the fright of his life, she sighed sympathetically.

 

“What did they do this time?” she asked “would you like some tea?” at Moebius’ nod she stood and moved away into the makeshift kitchen, Moebius sat down and quietly grumbled to himself.

 

“Bloody Time Lord” he grumbled as Azimuth gave him his tea “I’ll give her Time Lord, frigging worlds already got a streamer why go looking for more”

 

“What are you babbling about?” Azimuth asked blinking

 

“What kind of name is ‘Who’ anyway?” Moebius snapped Azimuth suddenly realized what he was talking about and gently nudged her own Doctor Who DVD under her desk.

 

“There, there” she cooed gently, this was not the first time she’d had to sooth Moebius’ bruised ego due to Doctor Who. “Just tell me what they did” they being Light and Kain of course. Light seemed near obsessed with the damn ‘Doctor’ and Kain just liked winding Moebius up, together it made a lethal combination to the Timestreamer’s ego.

 

Moebius slowly explained about the situation, strategically leaving out the part where he’d tripped and fallen into the sunken abbey in his haste to escape the ‘creature’ yelling at him and also where he’d gotten electrocuted by Kain.

 

“Oh” Azimuth said once he’d finished, she’d noticed the wet and slightly singed robe and had figured out the missing bits for herself. “Well” she slowly smiled “we can give them something to . . . ‘exterminate’ if you want”

 

 

* * *

 

{Sunken abbey}

 

“That was fun” Light purred “I’m hungry”

 

“What this time” Kain sighed “pizza?”

 

“I was thinking . . . . Um . . .”

 

The amazingly intellectual conversation continued all the way back to the sanctuary. Raziel joined in half way there but his only input was souls and maybe cheese.

 

 

* * *

 

{Dark Eden}

 

“Now what” Moebius asked blinking through the smoke trying to see the fruits of their combined labor, time and dimension magic, a lethal combination, lethal to cats and vampires both, or so Moebius hoped.

 

“What do you mean now what?” Azimuth’s voice was confused in the haze

 

“How do we control it” Moebius yelled over the growing rumble as the creature came to life, he grinned a perfect daemon, a daemon from the forgotten dimensions of time long passed, lets see them ‘exterminate’ that.

 

“Control?” Azimuth sounded worried now “what do you mean con . . .” she stopped as the smoke slowly cleared “Moebius?”

 

“Yes?” he muttered, hating the woman for her lack of foresight, he managed to forget that he had not thought about a means of control either

 

“You were thinking about the darlecs weren’t you” Azimuth asked

 

“How can you tell?” he asked looking down at the ground, his shoe lace had come untied, he leaned down to fix it.

 

“EXTERMINATE!!”

 

“Shit” Moebius whispered jerking back upright

 

* * *

 

{Sunken Abbey}

 

“EXTERMINATE!!” a strange voice shouted, Rahab paused, that had sounded strange . . . not alive.

 

He briefly remembered a similar sound from two different occasions, the first when Light had taken the entire sunken abbey with her through time into Meridian’s industrial age, Rahab shivered, he was glad his father had torn that place apart. The second time he’d heard a voice like that was a few months ago when Light had returned from a holiday, she’d built something . . . an orbital frame she had called it. She had spoken from within the giant creature her voice had sounded similar to the one he’d just heard.

 

Robotic, that was the word Light had used to describe it.

 

“EXTERMINATE!!!” the voice demanded again, Rahab sighed and turned around.

 

* * *

 

{Wastelands}

 

“I can’t believe you!” Azimuth shouted at the timestreamer as they ran through Nosgoth “we have a chance to summon up the most powerful and LOYAL daemon in the entire universe and you call forth a bloody killer salt shaker”

 

“It was not my fault” Moebius mumbled but it went unheard as Azimuth continued to rant

 

“It wasn’t even as if you had to do a lot just focus on demonic thoughts not bloody robotic!!!”

 

“Well I” Moebius was silenced as he was suddenly ran into by a flustered looking Rahab

 

“Darlec?” Azimuth asked Rahab frowned and did not get off the flattened timestreamer “a giant salt shaker screaming ‘Exterminate’

 

“Sounds about right” Rahab nodded, Azimuth sighed

 

“Alright where is it?”

 

* * *

 

 

{Sanctuary}

 

Kain and Raziel were lounging about the sanctuary. Kain was half asleep on the throne and Raziel was trying to read, he’d found one of Lights books from college and sat with it open in his lap

 

“You know you and this Hitler guy might have really got along” Raziel muttered at the half asleep vampire dictator “he was lazy to”

 

“I am not lazy” Kain opened his eyes “I’m un-vigorous”

 

“EXTERMINATE” a voice suddenly shouted, Kain rolled his eyes as Raziel squeaked in alarm

 

“Don’t worry” he sighed as Raziel jumped to his feet dropping the thick book “she’s been doing that all day” he grinned “made Moebius move pretty damn fast though”

 

“Kain” Raziel said slowly, that thing didn’t smell like Light “what has Light been doing?”

 

“Saying ‘EXTERMINATE’ in that stupid voice all day” Kain yawned and shuffled about on the throne getting more comfortable “two word vocabulary that girl, ‘Exterminate’ and ‘food’

 

“Has she been doing it while dressed like . . . a pepper shaker with a nozzle on the top” Raziel was edging backwards now

 

“A what?” Kain finally opened his eyes and glared at Raziel who was pointing behind the vampire he sighed loudly refusing to look “its just Light pissing about”

 

“AAAAHHHHHhhhhhh” the cry lasted about three seconds as the authoress bolted past the two muses

 

“See there she is” Kain shrugged and settled back down

 

“EXTERMINATE!!!”

 

Two seconds later both vampire and wraith were seen bolting from the sanctuary following their authoress.

 

* * *

 

{Wastelands}

 

“We are never going to find this thing” Moebius was getting fed up chasing the darlec across Nosgoth “Kain’s probably found it and . . .”

 

“And?” Azimuth demanded “if magic doesn’t stop it then I doubt the reaver will”

 

“He’ll have shouted at it” Moebius shrugged, he giggled suddenly –which was just wrong- “no doubt it will have gotten sick of his ability not to understand anything even ‘Exterminate’ and gone home, stupid vampire”

 

“That stupid vampire has more brains than you think, more brains than us anyway” Azimuth said suddenly, she stopped running.

 

“Why do you say that” Moebius asked

 

“Well” she sighed “we are running towards the darlec and he’s running away from it” she stepped to the side as vampire, wraith and feline all bolted past at a scarily high speed. Moebius was not so lucky and was flattened once again.

 

“We should run to” Moebius groaned, getting to his feet watching as the darlec came slowly towards them

 

“We shall” Azimuth agreed following the three ahead of them

 

* * *

 

{Frozen wastelands}

 

“What the hell are you doing here” Raziel demanded as Moebius and Azimuth caught up with them

 

“Running” Azimuth explained “running away from the thing”

 

“Darlec” Moebius wheezed, everyone was rather impressed as he managed to keep up

 

“Wait a minuet” Kain stopped running and everyone barreled into him, he remained standing everyone else wasn’t so lucky. “You know about this . . . creature”

 

“Um . . . no” Moebius had realized his mistake

 

“You! You brought this thing here!” Kain yelled

 

“YOU owe me an apology” Light booted her vampire in the back of his knee “all the way here I’ve been listening to ‘Light how stupid can you get’ and ‘who summons darlecs when there’s no way to stop them’ and ‘brain the size of a backed bean’

 

“Light can this wait” Raziel poked her shoulder and ducked as a laser shot over his head

 

“Blames me for everything” Light muttered as the group resumed its running

 

Janos’ Aerie loomed in the distance and everyone sighed in relief. That place was full of stairs and stupidly high balconies there was now way that the darlec could get them in there

 

“ELEVATE!!!!” The darlec rose upwards, ignoring the stairs

 

“Shit” everyone breathed

 

* * *

 

“What the . . .?” Vorador snapped as everyone bolted inside and started lifting Janos’ furniture against the door. He was unsure what bothered him more, that his quiet time with his maker had been interrupted or that Moebius, Raziel and Kain were in the same room and not trying to kill each other. Janos just watched silently.

 

“EXTERMINATE!!!” the door and furniture exploded inwards

 

“Oh now that’s no way to behave!!” Janos suddenly rose from behind his desk as the darlec entered the room, everyone else drove behind it. Kain dragged a confused and pissed off Vorador behind the wood as well.

 

“EXTERMINATE!!!!”  The darlec aimed its lazar at the ancient and fired, missing by a hairs breath as Janos leaned to the side

 

“That is unacceptable behavior” Janos said soft but firm “I’ll put you in the naughty zone!”

 

“The naughty zone?” Light raised an eyebrow at Vorador who blushed

 

“He keeps watching super nanny it’s not my fault” Vorador snapped as Janos started trying to push the darlec towards a corner

 

“That’s a really bad idea” Light muttered

 

“EXTERMINATE!!!! EXTERMINATE!!!!” the darlec screamed as it was forced into a corner,

 

“Now you’ve been put here because you were bad you do NOT try and exterminate people” Janos scolded, the darlec just looked at him confused “now say sorry”

 

“EXTERMINATE!!!!” 

 

“You can stay here for five minuets if you don’t say sorry!” Janos warned, the darlec shockingly just turned around and faced the wall.

 

“It’s sulking?” Raziel breathed. By turning the darlec had shown the ancient vampire its back and a small red button which was very dense really. Janos had never heard of curiosity killing the cat, but then Light was the only cat around so he didn’t really have to worry.

 

“What does this button do?” Janos asked the very confused and currently sulking machine, the ancient didn’t wait for a reply, he pushed the button

 

“EXTERMINATE!!! EXTERMINATE!!! . . . .CHARACTER MODIFICATION . . .  PEACE AND LOVE!!! PEACE AND LOVE!!!! PEACE AND LOVE!!!!”

 

“The darlec has lost it” Azimuth breathed from behind Janos’ desk

 

“NOT DARLEC, MOONSHINE, PEACE AND LOVE, PEACE AND LOVE!!!!!” 

 

* * *

 

 

{Three days later at Janos’ Aerie}

 

“Why can’t I get this right?” Light snapped throwing her pen at her history book “I officially have a whole new reason to hate the third Reich”

 

“You hated Tuna before” Kain muttered “but once you got passed the smell and tried it you liked it”

 

“You’re comparing Hitler to Tuna?” Light raised an eyebrow, which you really couldn’t see as the cat-girl was hidden underneath three blankets and sat on a giant hot water bottle.

 

“Well why not?” Janos asked “tuna and Hitler . . . . There are similarities”

 

“Yeah they both smell” Light snapped huddling into her bundle.

 

“SWEET TEA!!!!”  A cup was pushed at the feline, “HAVE A NICE . . . DAY!!!!”

 

“Thank you” Light sipped the warm drink given to her by the darlec which was now demanding to be called moonshine and was wearing an apron covered in kittens that Janos had bought for Light but she’d refused to wear.

 

“YOU ARE MOST WELCOME!!!” the darlec almost skidded on the ice as it returned to the ‘kitchen’

 

“I still can’t believe you kept it” Kain muttered looking at the tea cup he’d been given, “theirs oil in this!!” he fished about for a moment and pulled a bolt out of his cup and threw it at Janos

 

“It’s learning Kain” Janos glared at the other vampire while Raziel watched his cup dissolve, the tea inside being highly acidic.

 

“The tea’s not as bad as when it used its lazar to clean the cobwebs” Light muttered now chewing her pencil and glaring at her history book “or when it tried to give you a bath” Janos shuddered

 

“DID ALL FINISH HOT SWEET TEA!!!” The darlec poked out of the kitchen, it had now managed to put a flowery hat on.

 

“Oh yes” “yes it was wonderful” “yum” was the chorus of cries that met the question 

 

“GOOD!!!! I MAKE APPLE PIE NOW!!!!”

 

The End

 

Authoress note: I went a little wired today.

 

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