Elder god: ha ha your gonna get squished *raises a tentacle to squish Kain*

Kain: ZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz *wakes up* huh oh . . . great *runs*

Elder god: I hate you Kain *tries to hit Kain and the group with his tentacles of doom*

The group take the hint and after some death and gravity defying dodges they find themselves in the hall o warp gates (like hall of mirrors only warp gates)

Otaku: T_man we can't let him smash the park!

T_Man: *sarcasm* it would be a loss to humanity *sighs* fine then *his stomach makes a horrible sound* I'm gonna up chuck.

Both Otaku and T_Man rush out to save their park from the now rampaging giant squid.

Kain: well that went well *notices how quiet it is* where are they

Janos: Who?

Kain: *panicking* WHO DO YOU THINK!! MY KIDS!! *Runs off into hall o warp gates top find them*

Jedi: he's really bad at pretending he doesn't care

Janos: yeah we all know he cares just don't tell him that

Jedi: Why

Janos: you would most likely get screamed at then decapitated

Jedi: O_O ok not something to do then
* * Meanwhile * *

Kain: Where the hell can you go? This place isn't that big! When I find them I'm going to kill them! Little sods . . . what if I don't find them! *Freezes* oh god what if I NEVER find them!!

Suddenly Kain is kicked from behind

???: YOUR IT

Kain: I'm gonna KILL you

Little Raziel: RUN! *All the kiddies run off in different directions and into different warp gates*

For the next half an hour Kain chased the kiddies all over the warp gates going into a warp gate after one kiddie and repapering in the other end of the hall o warp gates. The kiddies found this hysterical and continued running into different places. But Kain is not as stupid as we would like to think, sneaking out into the park where the Elder god and Sin had both now gone on a rampage, Kain got candy floss, then side stepping the rampaging Sin who was battling with the elder god he made his way back into the hall of mirrors.

Kain: *shouting* OH LOOK WHAT I HAVE A HUGE CANDY . . . FLOSS . . . THING ALL TO MYSELF *is dog piled by sugar starved kiddies* HA! *Throws the kiddies into a room with a sign that reads do not enter unless you want to die*

Kiddies: LOOKIE!

A big shinny warp gate sits in the middle of the room and yes you guessed it they all run into it dragging a very P!$$ed Kain with them.
* * In this alternate universe * *

Sephiroth: how in hells name did I get here? Stupid life stream! This place sucks!! *Looks around*

There is nothing for miles except red desert a lone tower can be seen in the distance. Sephiroth decides the tower would be his best bet, when suddenly

Sephiroth: *dog piled by falling kiddies and a Kain* ouch

Kain: well at least we landed on something soft *pokes Sephiroth*

Sephiroth: GET OFF! *Is crushed yet more so as Janos falls on him to*

Kain: hi Janos . . . can you get off . . . you weigh a ton!

Janos: *hurt* hey! *Clambers off* and for your information I followed you here!

Kain: well that makes you heavy and stupid

Janos: *pouts*

Sephiroth: *standing and brushing himself down*

Kiddies: Cool . . . thingy

Turel: *steals Masamune*

Sephiroth: this is just weird . . . first I fall into the life stream, then I find myself here, then it rains vampires then one of the kids steals my sword *sits down to pout*

Turel: WWWEEEEEEE *tries to kill the other kiddies with Masamune only problem he can hardly hold the huge sword up*

Raziel: I'll help you! *Helps Turel try to decapitate the others*

Rahab: *ducks the huge sword* that's not funny I'M TELLING DADDY!!!!

Kain: what the hell *notices what his kiddies are doing*

Melchiah: *knocked over by Dumah as Dumah dodges the Masamune*

Kain: I'll take that *takes the Masamune*

Melchiah: I'M GONNA KILL YOU!! *Jumps on Dumah*

Dumah: FIGHT *all the kiddies dog pile each other and fight, while the adults place bets on who will win*

Kain: Janos where's that other guy

Janos: Jedi . . . last time I saw him he was fighting sin and the elder god he goes really nuts with that sword . . . HA IDEA!! *Wanders off with Kain's phone he can be heard muttering to some one*

Sephiroth: bet he doesn't have people falling on him! *Suddenly Sephiroth is crushed . . . again as Seymour (FFX) falls on him* I'm going to cry really I am

Seymour: I'M GOING TO KILL EVERYONE!!

Kain: bad day?

Seymour: There I am just wondering around with my pet sin I even found this old guy Moebius to bet up then the scabby sod opens a portal and look where I am in the middle of nowhere with no sin.

Janos: everyone's having a bad day today

Sephiroth: it rains people here watch your head

Janos: look we need to think here . . . where are we

Sephiroth: Hell

Kain: over dramatic a bit

Sephiroth: >:P try being me

Janos: *Flies up to get a look around but all he can see is red desert and a lone tower* my guess is the tower

Everyone agrees to this and takes a few steps forward but suddenly a huge and by huge I mean HUGE daemon pops up, seriously this thing makes Godzilla look small.

Daemon: *growl*

Kiddies: *huddle around behind Kain trying to hide*

Kain: this is not funny *casts a repel shield around him and the kiddies*

Seymour: I wish I had my Sin *casts Thunderaga*

Sephiroth: *still pouting* stupid daemon . . . well it didn't fall on me so that has to be a good thing

Suddenly (I say suddenly way to much don't I) a huge shadow appeared over the daemon. The daemon looked up only to be crushed by a huge ship with Executioner painted along the side.

Janos: just on time

Kain who the $%^$

Janos: well Fallen and Orpheum Zero were busy, I think there bashing Moebius at the park with the others so I phoned my other little friend.

Kain: how many little friends do you have!

A ramp opens on the ship and out walks a tall guy about 6' 7", wearing shiny sith armour. The kiddies seem amazed by this stranger and bolt over half way up the ramp before jumping on the poor guy.

???: *Stands slowly before walking over to Kain* these yours

Kain: yup

???: *Puts kiddies down and steps back*

Janos: Guys this is Sabretache

Sabretache: Lord Sabretache *shakes hands with everyone*

Sephiroth: Thank you for not falling on me

Sabretache: um . . . alright . . . not a problem

Kain: *whispering to Janos* Fallen had a weapon . . . several weapons . . .. Orpheum had weapons . . . this guy has nothing

Sabretache: *glares at Kain* if you don't mind * unclips and ignites two Sabres one green one purple*

Kain: *sarcasm* Wow you fight with flash lights . . . scary

Sabretache: *yet another glare before force choke comes into play*

Zephon: excuse me Sabrac . . . Sabch . . . .

Sabretache: *smiles* its Sabretache kid

Zephon: can you not hurt my daddy . . . please

Sabretache: *releases Kain* only cause you're a kid

Kain: *rubs his throat* that was a unique experience . . . and you're a soft

Sabretache: *trying to ignore Kain* shall we go

Janos: yup lets go

Kiddies: ride!! *Clamber all over the adults*

So basically the group is moving on wards, Kain is carrying Raziel, Janos fly's with Turel, Seymour carries Dumah who keeps pulling the guado's blue hair, Sabretache carries Melchiah while Zephon attached himself to Sabretache's leg and Sephiroth has Rahab swinging from his hair. The tower doesn't seem to be getting any closer.

Zephon: Are we there yet

Sabretache: No

Melchiah: Are we there yet

Sabretache: No

Zephon: Are we there yet

Sabretache: No

Melchiah: Are we there yet

Sabretache: *infinite patience . . . when kiddies are concerned anyway* No *ducks instants before Janos swoops down*

Turel: WWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Again Unky Janos again!

Janos: *pounds his wings to gain height before dropping like a stone to the ground again*

Turel: WWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEEE this is better than that roller coaster thing

Sephiroth: OW hey kid do you mind *pulls Rahab off his hair and carries him under his arm*

Rahab: but your hair was fun Seph

Sephiroth: its Sephiroth kid

Rahab: Seph *giggles*

Sephiroth: Sephiroth

Rahab: Seph *giggles more so*

Sephiroth: this is why I will never have children

Dumah: why is your hair blue

Seymour: because it is

Dumah: Why

Seymour: genetics

Dumah: why

Seymour: cause I'm a guado

Dumah: what's a guado

Seymour: me

Dumah: What's . . .

Seymour: you never stop asking questions do you *flicks his bang out of his face only to have it fall back into place*

Dumah: no ^_^

Raziel: ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz *drools on Kain's shoulder*

Kain: yuck . . . why did any of this happen . . . stupid Ariel 'adopt kids Kain I need them . . . don't see her looking after them, stupid woman, stupid Moebius, Stupid, stupid, stupid

Sabretache: *now extremely p!$$ed at Kain* you never stop moaning do you

Kain: . . . . . . . I hate you

Sabretache: I hate you to

The tower seems to be getting closer now thankfully Sabretache didn't think he could stand Kain for much longer, everyone had sore muscles and the kiddies were starting to moan about being hungry.
* * * *

Light: will the endless walk end? Will the kiddies get fed? Will Sabretache and Kain kill each other? Will Kain ever get some sleep? Is Hash'ak'gik still in the kiddie's bed all these questions will be answered in the next Kain's Kiddies coming soon to a fanfiction.net near you

Kain: That was over done

Sabretache: for once I agree

Sephiroth: you forgot about people falling on me

Light: will people ever stop falling on my Sephy Sama?

Sephiroth: that's not what I had in mind

Light: tune in soon and REVIEW I have . . .

Turel: Please review . . . *looks at the readers watching him and like Mel before he becomes very shy and hides behind Kain*

Kain: oh go on *pushes Turel out front*

Turel: *hides behind Sabretache*

Sabretache: Go on then *also pushes Turel out front*

Turel: okay . . . please review *shuffles around for a moment* cause Light *goes all shy*

Light: *holds tiny Turel's hand* better

Turel: *nods* okay Light promises each reviewer an hour with the kiddies *looks at Light expectantly*

Light: *gives Turel candy*

Also the reasons for this being so late, I've spent a lot of time changing my website please check it out plllleeeeeeeaaaaaaasssssseeeeeeee I have changed it completely its so different *begs quietly* anyway College is being mean again but I have turned out another chapter mw ha ha I'm unstoppable . . . I think

On with the show

\\//\\//\\ At the Park \\//\\//\\//

OrpheumZero, Fallen and Jedi are battling Sin and Elder god, who for some reason haven't killed each other; many people have placed bets, most vote for sin. A few random people are holding sighs reading 'GO SIN' and 'ELDERS OUR MAN' a few sensible people have ran away.

Orpheum: *leaping at the Elder god* BURSTING SLASH! *Energy wave hits elder god making a BIG HOLE*

Elder God: Owies! *Turns from sin for a moment and is hit HARD* OW! STOP HITTING MEEEEE

SIN: *deep chuckle*

Jedi: Bad SIN! Down boy!

SIN: nope :P

Fallen: Let's Fry 'em' up! *Flamethrower makes friends with SIN (burns the living %^$ out of him)*

Orpheum: Nice going, let's finish this!

\\//\\//\\// Wastelands \\//\\//\\//

The guys are still walking towards the tower, the kiddies fell asleep and are now cutely drooling all over the adults who are carrying them.

Kain:*carrying the sleeping Raziel under his arm like the kids a shopping bag* the towers getting farther away isn't it

Seymour: *whipping drool from his cool blue hair* I think your right eewww kiddie drool . . . kinda sweet though *smiles before lifting Dumah down from his back and carrying him in his arms* I think I'll keep this one

Kain: don't think so mate THERE MINE!!!

Sabretache: could you not shout . . . if they wake up we'll have annoying questions again

Sephiroth: *yawns* or ask your name fifty times

Janos: I'm gonna fly on ahead, I can move faster than you lot *whizzes off*

Kiddie Raziel: *wakes up and yawns* daddy I'm hungry

Kain: problem kid there's nothing here . . . you could eat Sabretache

Sabretache: your this close mate really this close!!

Kiddie Raziel: *snivels* but I'm really hungry *starts to cry*

Sephiroth: oh great crying children just what we need

\\//\/\\//\ Park \//\\//\\//\\//

Moebius: *crawling away using a popcorn box to hide behind* hee hee I'm so clever, no one will see me behind this, I'll escape and exact my revenge from a safe distance, hee hee so clever HAHAHHAHAHA-

Orphuem: YOU!!

Moebius: O.o Oh sh*t.

Orpheum: Fallen, Jedi!

Jedi: Yo!?

Moebius: Double sh*t.

Fallen: What's up?

Orpheum: Look over there.

Moebius: Triple Sh*t.

Orphuem: Let's get him. *Orphuem opens a small box and a tiny creature crawls out, this small creature happens to be Orphums mini SIN (about the size of a small cat)* hello Chronos

Mini SIN called Cronos: RRRAAAARRRGGGGG *tackles Moebius*

Moebius: ow my toshiee

\\//\\//\\// Janos \\//\\//\\//

Flying way past the natural speed limit, the tower still stays the same distance away. Janos lands.

Janos: stupid crap tower

Kiddie Turel: crap

Janos: not again, look kid don't repeat curses

Kiddie Turel: crap

Janos: there will be candy if you stop

Kiddie Turel: why aren't you teleporting to the tower Unky Janos?

Janos: *smacks his head* great outsmarted by a five year old . . . typical *teleports to Kain and the group*

Everyone but Janos: AAAAHHHHHHH

Kain: DON'T DO THAT!!

Sephiroth: I think my hearts stopped

Kiddies: (who are now awake) did you bring food Unky Janos

Janos: no sorry

Kiddies: *wailing* HUNGRY!!

Seymour: I don't think I want one any more

Kain: forget it you said you wanted them you can have them

Sabretache: will you two stop!!

Kiddies: HUNGRYHUNGRYHUNGRYHUNGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!

\\//\\//\\// Park \\//\\//\\//\

Orpheum: NOVA BLAST!!

Mini Sin called Chronos: *runs away VERY FAST*

Moebius: O.O Mommie.

BOOM!

Jedi, Orpheum and Fallen: *sniggering* well . . . *notice the elder god running (can he run!! SINCE WHEN?)*
\\//\\//\\/ Other side of the park \\//\\//\\//\

T-Man: stupid sin spawn . . . oh god I think I'm gonna upchuck . . . uuuuuuurrrrrr ate to much

Otaku: don't you dare I don't want to have to clean it up

T- Man: I can't help it!!

Suddenly (there I go again with the suddenly I really need a new word but anyway) Suddenly a HUGE sandworm appears

Otaku: oh god!

Sandworm: *growl*

T-Man: oh . . . *@#?%&

Without warning (see I didn't say suddenly ^_^) the elder god's tentacle whips the sand worm outta the park.

Elder God: Maw ha ha ha OW!! *Another person has joined the group fighting for the park*

Concept: *sniggering*

Elder God: WILL EVERYONE STOP PICKING ON ME!!! *Cries*

Concept: go back to your job then

Elder god:* wanders back to his place tentacles between his legs (that made no sense did it)*

Otaku: well that seemed easy . . . you need a job kiddo

Concept: *looking intrigued*

T-Man: wanna work on the roller coaster

Concept: yes . . . yes I do. *Wanders off to rides the insanely fast elder god roller coaster*

\\//\\//\\// Waste lands \//\\//\\//\\/

Janos: teleport ya? * The group teleport to the tower*

Janos: its empty . . . oh well teleport home now ^_^

Sabretache: screw that I'm not coming with you if you paid me a bazillion pounds!!! HE'S DRIVING ME NUTS!! *Points to Kain*

Sephiroth: My moneys on the dude with the glowing sword

Seymour: I don't know the Kain guy rules a world you must be pretty tough to rule a world

Sephiroth: I put 300 Gil on the dude with the glowy swords

Seymour: I'll take you and raise you to 400 Gil

Janos: screw this *teleports the group to the park*

Sabretache: MONEY NOW!! *Is paid* I'm off screw it if I'm listening to you %^£@ anymore *wanders off to find his ship*

\\//\\//\\//\\// Meanwhile (see I didn't say suddenly again ^_^) \\//\\//\\//\\//

T-Man: *holding his stomach in a lot of pain* AAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGG I CAN'T TAKE IT ANY MORE!!! *Collapses*

Otaku: bugger *notices Kain, Kiddies, Seymour, Janos and Sephiroth* hey guys wanna help me out

Kiddies: *acting like rabid dogs* FOOD!! FEED US NOW!!

Otaku: *points* hotdogs *kiddies run off to hot dog cart* now help me

Seymour: *looking around* is that . . . no it can't be . . . YUNA *waves madly*

Yuna: EEPPP!!! *Hides behind Jedi_and*

Sephiroth: she doesn't look too happy to see you

Seymour: oh well . . . I've got a plan maw ha ha ha ha ha . . . . don't she look fatter to you

Sephiroth: I've never seen her before

Seymour: she is she's put on weight

Yuna: *listening to them* um . . . its ICE CREAM I CAN'T FIGHT IT!!!

Seymour: um yes *sniggers* Seph help me laugh and point

Sephiroth: *laughing and pointing* isn't this cruel

Seymour: says he who tried to destroy the planet.

Sephiroth: hhhhuuuummmmmm . . . . *Notices T_Man who is now glowing strangely* what the hell

T_Man: *Glowing faintly red, opens Bright Red eyes and grins baring fangs*

Otaku: hey I didn't know you could do that . . . TELL ME HOW!!

T_Man: *who is some how possessed* I am chaos! I will DISTROY!!

Kain: hey we should trade phone numbers

Janos: this is just wonderful well if you'll excuse me *fly's away seriously fast considering how old he is*

T_Man/chaos: I have come for the six weapons of destruction *sees kiddies* there they be!

Kiddies: *eating hot dogs* huh?

T_Man/chaos: come with me to another world where we'll unleash ourselves maw ha ha ha

Kain: what's wrong with this world?

T_Man/Chaos: well actually your doing a pretty good job of screwing this world up so I'm just gonna let you work fellow artist

Kain: *beaming proudly* why thank you

T_Man/chaos: Now come small weapons *opens a hole in time and space and drags the kiddies through*

Kiddies: DDDDDAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Kain: hey! My kids!!! . . . .Bugger!

Otaku: god dam it T_Man Alright . . . well Kain we gonna save your kiddies or what *sighs boardly*

Kain: Damn right we are

Seymour: cool we'll wait here

Sephiroth: yup here

Kain: oh no you are coming with us!! *Pushes Seymour and Sephiroth through the hole in space before following*

Otaku: Concept, Jedi can you guys watch the park for me

Concept: *on the roller coaster* surrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Jedi: Yuna what do you mean you saw Seymour . . . huh Otaku what . . . Sure no problem . . . . Now Yuna Seymour's dead, he did not just come here with the kiddies and jump into thin air

Yuna: no he was pushed

Otaku: why me what did I do? *Jumps through the hole as it closes*

\\//\\//\\//\\ T_Man/ chaos \\//\\//\\//\

T_Man/ chaos: mmmmmm England, land of my birth and land of true beauty (yeah right whatever)

Melchiah: T where are we

T_Man/ chaos: England land of my . . .

Dumah: why

T_Man/Chaos: to destroy things . . . now come we will call forth my minions

Rahab: will there be candy

T_Man/ Chaos: um . . . sure

\\//\\//\\//\\// Kain and Otaku \\//\\//\\//\\//

Kain: where are we

Otaku: bloody T_Man!!! *Jumps up and down a few times* alright I'm fine now . . . . Oh god we're here . . . well look on the bright side we can get more help here *starts walking down a street*

Kain: WHERE!!

Otaku: follow me

Seymour: this place feels strange

Sephiroth: There's something here . . . something wrong . . . something that shouldn't exist

Otaku: of course Light lives here *a loud explosion is heard* oh god what now *runs down the street with the three guys in tow*

Otaku drags the guys up to a smallish house a lot of smoke and cursing is pouring from the basement Otaku knocks on the basement window

???: %)$$%£( . . . . . . Who is it?

Otaku: Otaku

???: Hey girl!! I'll be right up *after a lot of banging a small girl with dark hair who is covered in a lot of soot, opens the front door* HEY!

Otaku: YAY! *Hugs the girl*

The guys: ???

Otaku: hey Light . . . . You smell like a chimney . . . we got a problem

Light: *shakes her head, a cloud if dust and gun power fall from her* yeah so what's new, I was experimenting again . . . come in and we'll see what we can do about this problem shall we . . . *notices Kain, Seymour and Sephiroth* oh . . . you can come in to

Kain: *looks to the other two and shrugs* come on then

Seymour: is it just me or did that light girl have a tail

Otaku: shut it . . . she's . . . . Different

Light: I'm a cat daemon *grins bearing tiny cat fangs* now are we going to just stand on my doorstep or are we coming in *wanders inside swishing her tail*

\\//\\//\\//\\// T_Man /chaos \\//\\//\\//\\//

T_Man/ chaos: *reading a dusty old book* blah, blah, blah Author eats digi destined . . . becomes possessed . . . England . . . . Undead king, dead guado lord, one winged angel, sister of the possessed, cat . . . . Six weapons of mass destruction . . . blood. . . . Death . . . .candy . . . . Massacre . . . vacuum cleaner . . . . Yes it's all here

Kiddies: CANDY

T_Man/ Chaos: yes you will have candy . . . now we summon my army Maw ha ha ha ha

\\//\\//\\//\\// To be continued \\//\\//\\//\\