futility

in my head a thousand voices
in my heart a thousand heads
in my ears a thousand beats
to the beats
to the beats
to the beats
to the beats we march ahead.

through the tunnels in the darkness
shadowed by regret and hatred
we travel foot by step by crawl
crawling through the tiny spaces
allowing in no light at all

lumbering our way through nook and cranny
through the thimbles, thorns and catches
we never look back behind us
back to where the devils chase us
back to where trepidation looms
looming after and before

up ahead we see a crack
a splinter, a sharp, a rough of light
beaming at us up to meet us
on we plunge, dark becoming lightness
after us the trep cowers, growing weaker and still weak
as we ourselves become stronger and still strong

a few more feet. now just inches, only a few steps more
until the light our face embraces
until our hearts the light devours, bringing to us
but desolate traces of the former hidden dark
our breath quickens, our beats race, race to the sun before us now
hurry hurry salvation awaits us, hurry hurry
before it gets swallowed into this dark
like us and many travelers before

reaching with child-like hands,
with eager, needing, pleading hands,
just to cup a bit of warmth into our cold
and hardened palms, rough and callused palms

reach for the light, quick and grab it, let it go
and forever be encased in Hell, don't let go, keep it tight
but the strain upon our fingers
muscle hanging on in vain, don't let go, no not again,
free the soul, but keep the light, don't let go,
enprison the light to free yourself, isn't that the way it goes?

prying finger off by finger, keep the strength, don't let go
holding on by only four now, slowly, slowly,
agonizingly slow, and yet so quick we can't respond
the fourth is separated no don't let go.

three are left now, not too long now
not too strong now, you've just about let go
down the spiral staircase made of granite
tumbling into Satan's crevice, to burn

only two left, we've already given up.
one to go now; what's done is done now
the future is past now, no going back
the apocalypse is upon us now.

how's it feel to be once again lost in an eternity of dark,
knowing that sliver of light, hope, and heaven were once your's
grasped between you sweaty fingers, but once again
nevermore.
Hell

Red as the river of life that makes its way
out and through your body;
That encomposes the spinning earth
as it swallows the sun;
That mingles with autumn's yellows and oranges,
holding cocktails at a pristine party.

Dark as the air around a wintry tree
that scratched upon your window as a boy;
As the shadow of a shadow that prances
beneathe your feet at noon as it laughs;
As an abandoned attic, strewn with webs
of a spider's fantasy covering the milky floor.

Cries of pain and misery, woe and agony
whispering, screaming from all corners;
Cries of anguished and tormented souls
that attempt to reach you through crevices;
Cries, empty voids containing lack of hope,
embrace your heart, summon humanity.

Red as the glint of success in an assassin's eye;
Dark as the abyss of a room left untouched for centuries;
Cries that demand pity, grief, and sorrow which dwell in this place -
This place called Hell.
whyhasallthesnowmelted

The clock on the wall
(why'stheclockonthewall)
Doesn't seem to speak anymore
(whydon'tyouevercall?)
It's always silent anymore
(stopthesounds!please)

Screaming in my head
(whydon'tyougoforawalk)
I can't seem to stop the screaming
(apieceoflettucehasescapedfromthecountyjail)
Why have my ears gone deaf?

The clock doesn't talk
(tictoctictoc...tic...toc...)
The birds have ceased to sing
(shutUPthoselousyringamadingsoutsidemywindowjustmakethem
STOP)
My mind has gone fuzzy
(crunchysourbittersaltysmoothcoldcriminalinjustice)
Sweet.
Sweet sounds of the morning sparrows
(outsidemywindowtheywon'tshutUPmakethemmakethemtellthemto
STOP)
My heart beats stutter and stop,
My breathing becomes erratic,
My mind begins to slow
(whyhasallthesnowmeltedwhathappenedtotimwherehavemyfriendsgone
STOP)
And then speed, design, smoothness returns
(whatamidoinghere?iwantmymommy)

I love my crazy friends.
(weloveyoutoo)
A Tree-Hugger's Epitome

She walks like you; she talks like us; she works like them; she is only she.
He pretends to be one of a kind but we all know the truth; he is no different.
Some are; some aren't: there's really no way to tell.
Unless you take the time to find out.

Its very unlikely for one of our kind to exit the circle and then re-enter.
We are demanding; we demand too much, but isn't that our way of life?

What, after all, would you expect, from humans?
What, after all, is there to want from a heartless, spineless, cruel breed of mammal?

They rule the trees, using them as transportation.
We use the earth's natural sources until they are unusable.

They run the sea, as well as the air.
They live, breathe in both mediums.
We, on the other hand, pollute both.

Are we suicidal? Is that our big design?
Are we commiting a mass murder?
Is that our place in the scheme of things?
To end this world so a new one could be put in its place??
If so, I'll end it the fast and easy way.
The End.
The Sun Does Shine

As sun light begins to fade
As the stars begin to shine
As soon as I find you
You will, you will, be mine

As the sky becomes a hole
A hole filled with tears
The tears become you
They fit so well, indeed, my dear

But in the night, as darkness looms
The crescent of the harvest moon
Smiles in a subtle way
But smiles, smiles not in day

The creatures of the night awake
Crawl from under dirt that caked
They venture to the Unknown
They venture where the wind has blown
But the dirt the farmers had sown
Wakes unto a new day

After the stars do fade
And when the sun does shine
Quiet Contemplations

Quiet contemplations down by the old oak trees
Thoughts of Halloween, bobbing for apples,
As the auburn leaves ride the slight breeze
And acorns are buried deep within the depths of the earth,
Storage for the winter to come.

Thoughts of the dying August, sleeping in its lair,
Waiting for the next eleven to pass, for it to arise again,
So it may again bring forth the colored trees,
And the colored leaves, only to die again.

Thoughts of the ruffling winds, stirring the leaves
Hanging from limp branches, falling from dying trees
Blowing the soft and fine hairs of the almost-grown,
Just-facing-the-world offspring, going off to start families of their own.

Thoughts of Christmas, soon to come,
Raising the hearts and souls of the mournful, the jaded
Holding sweet promises of toys and candies, and love
Overflowing stockings and tumbling onto hard-wood floors.

Quiet contemplations down by the old oak trees,
Thoughts of what has passed, from birth to life,
First entering the world anew, then leaving it, old and ready for decay.
Passing through the stages gradually, first to second to third,
Then finally to the last, where they breed their own, to start the cycle again.
Poetries
Blind Spot

sorry about that
didn�t mean to rub
on you the wrong way
all i wanted was to have a good
time, but that�s all i was to you
more time you had to spend
doing something you�d rather not
with someone you�d rather not
be with, but i insisted, blind-sighted
as i am, i didn�t see it
didn�t see that you hated me
didn�t see that you couldn�t take
my nagging and lame jokes and
all around personality
didn�t see any of this coming.
i apologize
for all those times i called you
friend, for all those times i depended
on you, and asked you for advice.
and i hope you�ll forgive
me for leaning on you shoulder to
cry � didn�t know it bothered you that much
didn�t know you couldn�t stand to hear my voice;
see my face; touch my skin.
didn�t know any of this was coming.
funny how you can go through life and
not see all the people that hate you
and loathe you
and laugh behind your back
but you helped me overcome that
and thanks to you,
ill see all of this coming next time.
Inside

inside, as though of night,
is black and hollow and decay
death departs, but once,
and then to return without delay

corrupt and putrid in its innocense
its wonder never ceases,
and yet, to see such convelescence
is a miracle beyond sad thesis.

a wandering eye may come upon
a horrid thing as this
and with a viewing so fetid,
to oblivion with but a kiss.

but wrapped in a warmly coat
kept from thus seeing eyes
none such shall look upon
in order for goodbyes.

so one sees no precaution
nor pays this any heed
but in the darkness of the night
the blackness shall leap.


The wonderous world of everything green
yellow orange and red
sees naught but positive and golden
feelings of the haunted dead.

but haunted they are, though seemly light
cheery and gay
but in their minds, there dwells what man
could dare not say.

but to The wonderous world of everything
green and bright and lovely
nothing is rotten nor decayed; none things exist �
as such death and poverty.


lurking above the surface ground,
wishing to be beneath
the rotten and decaying lives
are sadly, badly unsheathed.

they cry for �SOLITUDE!�, for �REST!�
for things to them not given
for anything, to be alone, hell
they�d take heaven.

but living among the living
is not how they exalt
to be alone, to be alone
is not their only fault.
To Be Alone
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