NEW YORK CITY, NY – KIRSTIN’S LOFT – FEB. 14TH, 2002 – Tuesday

     “Ok. I gotta talk.” Ashley said and entered the loft, before Kirstin could even say a word. But even if she had to say a word, she didn’t know if she would be able to. She didn’t expect to see Ashley so soon “Listen. Ever since I left this loft this morning, I have done nothing but to think about this situation.” Ashley still couldn’t look Kirstin in the eyes. He was pacing around the couch “I couldn’t sleep tonight. And I guess we’re gonna have to talk about sooner or later, so…” Kirstin stared at him, without saying a word “Say something!” Ashley exclaimed.

     “I… I don’t know what to say. I didn’t expect to see you anytime soon. In fact, I…” Kirstin looked down and trailed to the couch “I didn’t expect to see you anymore.” she played with her fingers. Ashley looked at her. She seemed so tired. And you could tell by her eyes that she had been crying all day long.

     “Kirstin...” Ashley tried to start and took a deep breath to collect all his courage “Kirstin.” he still didn’t know how to start “Kirstin. Here’s the thing.” but he still didn’t know how to tell Kirstin what he had decided. Kirstin was dying in anxiety, but didn’t wanna show it, so she had her back to Ashley “As I already told you, I spent the whole day thinking. It wasn’t easy.” Ashley let out an ironic chuckle.

     “I know… I’ve been through that the whole day as well.” Kirstin informed Ashley.

     “So… I don’t know how to start this… This is so difficult!” Ashley hit the couch. Kirstin let a tear fall. His actions weren’t helping Kirstin calm down. He was tense, she was tense and the situation was tense.

     “Just… say it, Ash. Ok? Just… spill it out. I can handle anything right now.” she tried to hide from him that she wiped a tear away.

     “Ok. Kirstin, I have to confess that I’ve thought about marrying you and starting my family with you. Actually, you’re the only girl that I’ve ever thought about doing all that with. You’ve been the most important person in my life ever since I first saw you. You’ve been a constant in my mind since that day as well. And all this time after prom that I spent trying to find you, it was like I was trying to find a part of me. And it hurt. Too much, actually. Because I wasn’t complete. And then we finally get together and then we break up. Then we get together again and this comes between us now.” Ashley stopped pacing around the room and sat on a chair in front of the couch Kirstin was sitting on “When I was looking for you after prom, my life was difficult, but I kept going on because I knew sooner or later I was gonna find you and life would be great. And that’s what happened when we first got together. I was the happiest man alive. And then, when you broke up with me, I was devastated. I tried to imagine my life without you from that day on and it sucked. It had no meaning, because the meaning of it was to find you and to be with you, but you didn’t want me. What would I do next? Then I decide to go on with my life, despite the pain of not having you with me. When I saw you with Tom, I couldn’t believe it. It was like I had lost you for the worst person alive. I knew he wasn’t good for you. Something told me he wasn’t good for you. I wanted to do something to warn you about that guy, but I thought it was just jealousy. So I let that go. And then I finally have the chance to have you back. I couldn’t believe I had been given a second chance to make my life right this time. And then you tell me you’re expecting his baby.” Ashley took a deep breath “I saw all my dreams once again flushed down the toilet. And somehow it hurt more this second time then the first one. Because now there was this baby’s life involved. I wouldn’t just hurt you, this baby would suffer too without a father. But then I kept thinking it was Tom’s baby and because of that, it deserved it. Pure pride. I know. But how am I suppose to react?” Ashley looked at Kirstin, who was looking down ever since he started talking. He could see the tears fall from her eyes “So, I started to imagine my life without you and all the dreams I had with you in my life disappearing. And then I imagined my life with you and the baby, but I’ll always think of Tom whenever I look at this child.” Ashley played with his fingers and Kirstin saw that. She started to cry more “And I realized something after all this thoughts.” Kirstin look up abruptly, but hopeless “I can’t not have you in my life anymore. I’ve already been through that, I know it’ll be too painful for me to go through that again. And if this baby is coming along, I’ll accept it. I’ll accept everything that comes along with you. Every responsibility. As long as you’re with me. Because I know that our love for each other is too strong and it makes us too strong, so we are able to overcome every situation that is presented to us. I don’t care what it is, I just know that I wanna be with you. For always.” Ashley finished talking and looked at Kirstin. She had her glare on Ashley, but didn’t say anything. It was like she hadn’t understood what Ashley had just said, because she wasn’t making any movements. Ashley kept staring at her too, to see if she’d snap out of it.

     “Ashley…” it took a while for Kirstin to start talking “I… I don’t know if that’s what I want.”