~*~ Chapter 17 ~*~
REDDING, CA - The Addams' House
Kirstin rubbed her face with both her hands. She couldn't believe she had called out Ashley's name right after having sex with Tom.
"Stupid, stupid, stupid!" she was hitting her own forehead. But did that mean something? Did she call Ashley's name out because she wanted him to be there? "No! Of course not! I shouldn't even think that! I love Tom, we're getting married, he loves me too and… Well, I'm not so sure about that anymore…" she started to cry again. She couldn't lose Tom. Tom was really important to her. She loved him too much. He was her shoulder to cry on, he understood her, he knew how to fix her problems, he never treated her bad, he'd always be there whenever she needed him around, he was her harbor… She couldn't picture herself without him anymore.
She looked at the clock. 40 minutes had gone by since Tom had entered the bathroom. She looked at the door for a while, expecting him to be out soon. Nothing. She couldn't hear a thing too. She suddenly pressed her belly. She felt sick. Her stomach ached. She just couldn't be at that room anymore. She took Tom's shirt off and put her panties and nightgown on. She headed to the bathroom at the end of the hall. She walked slowly, so she wouldn't wake anyone up. She then locked the bathroom door and in a matter of seconds, she was vomiting. She didn't vomit too much, but she was not feeling good at all. She washed her mouth and decided to go downstairs for a while.
She entered the kitchen and poured herself some water.
"Still up?"
"God, Kelly! Are you trying to kill me?"
"To try is not a crime." she smiled at her sister, but she noticed something was wrong "What is it? What's wrong?"
"My stomach aches."
"But haven't you treated that already?"
"Yeah. But the doctor said that it's never gonna be one hundred percent."
Kirstin had a stomach problem. Whenever she didn't get enough sleep or when she had lots of stress going on in her life, she would feel strong stomach aches.
"Have you taken your drug?"
"I didn't bring it. I thought it would be a peaceful Christmas party. Could I be more wrong?" she just shook her head and smiled a bit.
"I think mom might have some on her medicine box. Let me go check that on the bathroom."
Her sister left the kitchen and Kirstin decided to sit on a bench in her backyard. After a while, her sister came back with a pill on her hand.
"Here. Mom has a whole box of it here." she gave the pill to her sister and sat beside her.
"That's mam. Always prepared." she said and then took the medicine and a sip from the glass of water she brought along with her.
"And always thinking you'll move back here again."
"Well, that won't happen like… ever!"
"I hear you. Same with me. I hate this place."
"Why do you think that is?" Kirstin wondered.
"What is?"
"Why do you think you and I hate this place so much?"
"I don't know. I just do." Kelly didn't really know why she didn't like Redding "But you, at least, have reasons. And a lot of them."
"Yeah." Kirstin looked down.
"I saw Jess the other day."
"Really? When? Here in Redding? Tell me where and I'll never go to that place."
"Chill. It was in L.A. At this frat party. I thought it was weird because I know for a fact he doesn't go to UCLA."
"That's for sure. He could never get in and he was never that good playing ball." they giggled.
"So, I don't know what he was doing there."
"Maybe some jock from his former team goes there."
"Yeah, maybe."
"But you didn't talk to him, did you?"
"God, no! And I don't even think he even knows who I am anymore."
"Good. If you ever see him again, just stay away from him, alright?"
"Of course. Don't even have to ask."
"Good."
The sisters just stayed quiet for a bit, until Kelly broke the silence.
"Why are you here and not in bed with Tom?" Kelly asked her sister.
"He hates me."
"What? Don't be absurd."
"It's true."
"What did you do this time?"
"Why do you always assume I'm the one who's done something?"
"Well, weren't you?"
"Yeah…"
"See? I'm always right. So what did you do?"
"We had sex and…"
"Ew. Don't wanna know the details."
"Don't worry. I don't intend on telling them."
"Good. So… what happened for him to hate your guts?"
"After we were done, I called him Ash."
"No!" Kelly raised her voice.
"Sh! Don't be so loud!"
"No! You didn't!" Kelly lowered her voice a bit.
"I did." Kirstin bit her bottom lip.
"My God! No wonder he hates you! You called him Ash. Exactly the guy he hates and just punched tonight."
"I know. I'm always messing things up with Tom. I don't even know why we're still together. I don't know how he can deal with all this Ashley crap. If I were him, and he was friends with a female version of Ashley, I would have dumped him ages ago."
"Me too!"
"Then why is he still with me?"
"Kirstin, he loves you to death! Don't you see it? When you love someone that much, you don't let things like that get in the way."
"But I called him Ashley!"
"Oh, for that, he won't forgive you."
"Really? You really think so?"
"For the love of God, would you forgive him for calling you by someone else's name? After having sex?" Kirstin just looked down "Exactly what I thought." Kelly continued.
"But I didn't mean to."
"It doesn't matter if you meant it or not. You said it. It's done."
"It can't be over, Kel. I love him so much. I don't know what I would do without him."
"Then go tell him that."
"He won't let me. He's been locked up in the bathroom for more than an hour now and won't come out."
"Just go there. Make him come out. If you really love him, you won't let him go that way."
"You're right. I love him and I won't let him go that easy."
"That's the spirit! Now go!"
"You don't have to." both girls turned over and saw Tom standing there, just some feet behind them. Kelly turned to her sister, smiled at her, got up and left.
Tom sat beside Kirstin and she just faced him. He was looking to the horizon. They stayed like that for a while. Kirstin was dying to talk, but she didn't know how to start. When she was about to open her mouth to say something, Tom started.
"Was all that true?"
"What?" Kirstin frowned.
"That talk you were having with you sister."
"How much did you hear of it?"
"Does it matter?"
"It was all true." Kirstin looked down.
"Even the part where you said you don't know what you'd do without me?" Tom and Kirstin made eye contact.
"Especially that part."
"Kirstin, I don't know if I can forgive you for that."
"But, Tom, I swear I wasn't thinking of Ashley and…"
"That's a lie."
"That's not a lie, I swear."
"You'd never call someone's name unless that person is on your mind."
"Maybe he was on my mind, because I was sad about everything that happened over dinner and all, but I was not picturing him while having sex with you. That's insane."
"Can you promise me that, Kirstin? Because I really wanna believe that. I don't know if I can live being afraid that every time we're having sex, you're thinking of him."
"Tom, I swear. I promise. I was not thinking of him while we were having sex. I called out his name because… because I'm messed up, I'm clueless. I'm still confused with everything that happened tonight, but that doesn't mean I pictured him while I was with you."
"Why are you thinking of him anyway?"
"Because, Tom. Because we talked and we said everything would be the same as before now, but then he left and we didn't talk enough. I don't know where we stand, I don't know anything. I'm lost. And I don't like this feeling."
"Kirstin, I spent probably an hour in that bathroom, thinking. I tried to picture myself leaving you, just giving up on us, because this situation is really difficult for me. It's like you're hung up on this guy and you'll never let go and…"
"That's not true, Tom, I…"
"Please, let me finish." Kirstin looked at the horizon "So, it's like you're hung up on him and you can never let him go. Maybe you don't love him. Maybe you're telling me the truth."
"I am."
"Maybe he is just this guy that, for some reason that I will never understand, is really important to you and you don't wanna let him go. Maybe he's just that friend you always talk about and you clearly miss. And I was thinking about all that in the bathroom. And I came up with two decisions. Either I just give up on you and let you go do whatever you wanna do with your life without me on it because it's really hard to face the fact you need Ashley around or I just have to accept Ashley. Accept that, in order for me to have you in my life, Ashley has to come with the package. For our love to work, for our engagement, and soon, wedding to work, I'm gonna have to live with that." Kirstin looked at him expecting an answer soon "And what I choose is to…" Kirstin was dying of anticipation. She needed to know his answer. It was her life Tom was deciding right there "I… as hard as it is… I'm… I'm accepting the whole package. You plus Ashley. I love you and I can't just let you go because of that pretty boy."
"Oh, my God! Are you serious? Are you forgiving me?" tears started to fall from Kirstin's eyes.
"Yes. I have to. I love you too much to live without you."
They got up and hugged each other. Then Kirstin pressured her lips on Tom's and gave him a passionate kiss. When they pulled back, Tom spoke.
"But I don't wanna hear his name in our bed again, ok?"
"Promise! Cross my heart." Kirstin made a 'x' over the left side of her chest.
"Good. And you said you were confusing about this whole situation of today, right?"
"Yes. But, well…"
"Then tomorrow you're going to the pretty boy's house and you go talk to him. Make things right again. I don't want to see you sad about that again, all right? Just fix that soon, because we leave in three days."
"Really? I'll go to his house and you won't be all mad and jealous?"
"Not this time. This time you can go. I'm letting you go."
"But you're not the boss of me." she smirked, joking with him.
"That's right. You are the boss of me. We're just switching parts for the day."
"Hm, I like that." they laughed.
"Come on. Let's go to bed."
* Thanx Taryn and Stacie for reviewing and correcting the grammar errors *
~*~ Chapter 16 ~*~
~*~ Chapter 18 ~*~
Feedback: [email protected]