| Glass Carosel |
| Black is black and white is... not... I must have danced half the night, and into the morning with that blonde god. I thought he was exactly what I'd needed to rid myself of the obsession I'd immersed myself into over a man I didn't even know. By the time I'd broken a sweat, I was feeling foolish for crushing so hard so fast. By the time I felt like ripping off my clothes and having sex on the nearest table with the hottie, I'd completely forgotten about the reason why I was there in the first place. Isaac? Isaac who? I have to admit, I'm not angelic, but neither am I a slut. No, I am no longer a virgin. Yes, each time I've been intimate, it's been with someone I've cared deeply for. But this... this was different. This was lust. Pure and simple. I was feeling reckless. I was doing things with abandon. Not always a good combination. I can tell you one thing though, he wanted it just as much as I did. Then again, when do men not? That's beside the point... I knew he wanted more then just a dance when he asked if I'd come to the club alone. I think it was very fortunate for me that I hadn't, for if I had, I might have done something I would have regretted later. I mean... I didn't even know the guys name! It was about that time that I'd started to drink. I was going to party hard. And I did. I might have been feeling good, but I wasn't drunk, not by a long shot. Well... at least not at first. I had had only one drink, and was half way through my second when I dragged the beefcake back to my table to find one of the girls. Kelly was the only one there, taking a breather it seemed. I told her I wasn't going to be in any shape to drive home. I held up my glass and shook it at her to let her know in case she didn't hear me. She nodded and I pointed to my purse to indicate she should get the keys now. She did so and I yelled across the way for one of them to come and find me when it was time to go. I don't know if she heard me or not. I really didn't care at the moment for it was then that my dance partner wrapped his arm around my middle and pulled me back up against him, his lips brushing over the nape of my neck. Right about then, the world could have been invaded by little green men from mars and I wouldn't have cared. It was like some sort of fantasy from then on. He pulled me back into the fray, his firm body pressed against my back. My heart was pumping with the beat of the music, driving hard and fast. He spun me around and grabbed me up once more, pulling me back in. He had such a look of hunger in his eyes. They were mesmerizing really. They pulled me in, and I couldn't escape. Not that I really wanted to. He moved like an exotic animal, fluid and fast, melding our bodies together. All time was lost to me as he transported me to a different time and place. He kissed me. It wasn't just a simple brush of lips. It was no press of flesh on flesh. It was a phenomenom within itself. Deliciously indescribable. Forever imprinting that moment upon my memories. Every kiss before and there after, would have to mesure up to it. I had to make a concious effort to pull away from him and fill my body with air once more. In that kiss, I would have almost gladly given my last breath to have it go on forever. My head was literally spinning when I looked up to him. His eyes, smokey and heavy lidded, they slid into my very being. I watched in a trance as his wet pink tongue slid over his luciously full lip, tasteing of me. I don't know when we had stopped dancing, but it was then that I became aware of it as someone bumped into me from behind. Like a flash flood, my surroundings suddently rushed in upon me. Suddenly, I didn't want to be there anymore. I'd rather be almost anywhere... just as long as he was there too. He must have been thinking the same thing I was right then, for he grabbed my hand and wordlessly led me away from the noise and chaos. I didn't know where he was takeing me, and I didn't much care either. It seemed like no time at all before I found myself entering a darkened corner where the main room met a hallway at an odd angle. If there were any lights in the hall, none were lit at that time, the only illumination comming from the flashes that swept over the dance floor like a strobe with a heart murmer. He didn't let go my hand as he turned to me, pulling me further into the dark and pressing me against the wall. My hands needed no instruction as they got familiar with each and every inch of his bare skin to be found, and pioneering their way to a few new territories as well. A barrage of divinity rained down upon me in the form of perfect kisses. Slow and steady, each one a sin in satisfaction. I kissed him back with ferver, loosing myself to him. I felt his rough fingers skim over the small of my back and I shivered with how delicious it was. He pressed himself to me, his urgency making itself known as he ground his hips into me. I was nearly ready to faint save for the fact that I would have missed a moment of his pressence. I wrapped my leg around him, pressing to him tightly and I could feel the rumble of pleasure in his chest. He broke away from me, chest heaving as he gulped in air. I too was laboring to breathe, and it felt so good. His head dipped to my shoulder as I gyrated against him, the ache so like fire within me I was surprized when it was his moan I heard instead of my own. Gently he bit upon my shoulder, making me nearly come unglued as he nibbled his way up my neck, a final tug on my earlobe before I heard his gravely voice float into my thoughts. Be careful what you wish for... "I want you so bad baby.. so bad I can't stand it!" Then he looked at me, eyes dark and pleading. "I..." I was at a loss for words. I wanted him too of course, after all, sex with a stranger is just about everyone's secret fantasy right? But I didn't even know the man! And in this day in age, with all that can happen. That was just a bit more dangerous then I liked to live. I was so far in trouble, I didn't see but only one way out of it. I pushed him away, the look of confusion upon his face quickly replacing his sexy haze. He reached for me, grabbing at my wrist. I pulled away from him fast as lightning and shook my head, trying to appologize with my eyes as I fled backwards. Turning around, I burst back out onto the dancefloor, pushing my way through the throng. I could feel him chasing after me, but I just couldn't face him. Or rather face myself and how far I'd let myself get carried away. After several twists and turns, I found Willow. Just the look on my face was enough to tell her that it was time to go. She put her arm around my shoulder and led me away quickly. We looped through the fracas and found the table we girls were sharing. Cindy was sitting there and looked startled when she saw how upset I was. She jumped up and hurried over to me. I reassured her with a look that I was ok, and only wanted to go home. Now. With a nod towards the door and a stern look, she told Willow to take me to the car and she would round up the other girls. Frazzled, I followed Willow to my car and was ever so grateful to climb in and wrap up in my duster. I just wanted to go home and take a long hot bath. I felt so ashamed of myself. I vowed I'd become a nun... and I'm not even catholic! Within minutes, all of the girls piled in and we were off. It was a quiet ride back, the girls knew I didn't feel like talking about it just yet. I climbed over to the drivers side at Cindy's house. Though I was sober, I was shaken. I had to assure Cindy I was capable of the few miles between her house and mine's short drive. She relented and I sulked the rest of the way home. |
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