January 16, 2004

In 1992 I had an accident that resulted in a fractured pelvis.

Around 1996 or 1997 I began showing minor walking difficulties. I had minor problems walking on the train. It got even worse several years later. At the time I was working for an internet provider and my walking got worse and I appeared to others as I was drunk although I did not drink. When I was working for an internet provider and completing an installation at a motel I fell several times.

Several close family members had major investments in the ISP that I was working for. It was just the beginning of the internet investment insanity. Many people were drawn to the get-rich-quick schemes and memories of missed investment opportunities when television was young. There were many lies and pitfalls for the average investor that was not well informed about computer networking. Quite a few people with evil intentions relied on that fact to mislead investors with technical double-talk. As a skilled network engineer I could see through the lies and half-truths. My objective was to protect my family, especially my step-father and mother.

At the time I didn’t know exactly what was wrong, but somehow I knew it was either Multiple Sclerosis or some other form of neurological condition. I knew that regardless of what exactly it was it was surely neurological and that there are no cures or treatments for them. I had an objective to accomplish before I became too disabled to work. My walking difficulties became obvious to others so I conveniently blamed them on my pelvis accident. What was a problem was that my drunken appearance was not as easily explained.

Also I have always been strong and I never wanted to be labeled as a hypochondriac or a complainer that complains about every little problem and many things seemed just like small problems and would make me appears as a complainer.

I must admit that misleading people about my medical condition was wrong and I am paying for that now. I have a credibility problem now. Nobody believes me now, but actually that really is not too much of a problem because nobody really believed in me before anyway. Also my efforts were in vain, but I don’t regret my decision because my intention was pure and that did not depend on the outcome.

Now my main concern is identifying this and to know whether this is genetic. I want to know if I unknowingly passed this onto my son. Unfortunately when my symptoms started I was the only one affected, but now it appears that my brother is also affected. Like me he refuses to see a doctor to be evaluated.

I sincerely hope that this is not genetic, but if it is I hope that I can help anyone else affected by sharing my experiences and providing some warning. Warning that I did not have.