Other Jokes
This is a page of humor compiled from various locations on the web. Some of the jokes have been slightly altered for better enjoyment. They are catergorized by instrument below:
Clarinet Q: How do you get a clarinet out
of a tree?
A: Cut the noose.
Q:What's the definition of a nerd?
A: Someone who owns his own alto clarinet.
Q: How many clarinetists does it
take to change a lightbulb?
A: Only one, but he'll go through a whole box of bulbs before finding the right
one.
Q: What do a clarinet and a lawsuit
have in common?
A: Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.
Q: Is there any difference between
the sound of a clarinet and that of a cat in heat?
A: Of course there is, but only if the cat's in good health.
Q: What is the best use for duct
tape?
A: Taping a clarinetist's mouth closed.
Q: What's the definition of a minor second?
A: Two flutists playing in unison.
Q: What key is the alto flute pitched
in?
A: G-- I really don't care, either!!
Q: What's the difference between
a flutist and a seamstress?
A: A seamstress tucks the frills.
Q: How do concert band flute players
does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: They ask their boyfriend to do it for them.
Q: How do you make a trombone sound like a French horn?
A: Put your hand in the bell and miss a lot of notes.
Q: What do you get when you cross
a French horn player with a goal post?
A: A goal post that can't march.
Q: Why is the French horn a divine
instrument?
A: Because a man blows in it, but only God knows what comes out of it.
Q: What is the difference between
a french horn section and a '57 Chevy?
A: You can tune a '57 Chevy.
Q: How many French horn players
does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Just one, but he'll spend two hours checking the bulb for alignment and leaks.
Q: What's the difference between
an oboe and an onion?
A: Nobody cries when you chop up an oboe.
Q: What's the definition of a "half
step?"
A: Two oboes playing in unison.
Q: How do you get an oboist to
play A flat?
A: Take the batteries out of his electric tuner.