Mackenzie wakes up in Stefan�s arms and starts laughing under her breath.
Stefan: (his eyes still closed) �What�s so funny?�
Mackenzie: �Did it ever occur to you that there are places in this city where you can rent a butler and French maid�s uniform?�
Stefan: (half asleep) �This is what you�re thinking about at seven am? You need a hobby, my darling Mackenzie.�
Mackenzie: �Stefan, THINK ABOUT IT. Very carefully.�
Stefan: (thinking about it and then starting to laugh) �You are so bad! They�re never going to forgive us for this!�
Mackenzie: �EXACTLY!� she starts laughing again. �And I had better buy film today. This needs to be captured on film for eternity.�
Just then, Christabel comes running into the room, dragging Adrienne and a blanket.
Christabel: (yelling) �DADDY! MOMMY! Nikolas isn�t here!�
Stefan: �Good morning to you too, Christabel. What do you mean Nikolas isn�t here?�
Christabel: (getting onto the bed and jumping on it) �He�s not in his room.�
Mackenzie: (raising her eyebrows) �I think he�s okay, you guys. Don�t worry about it.�
Christabel: (throwing herself on top of Stefan) �Daddy, I want to do something.�
Stefan: �I know something you can do. Go get dressed for school.�
Christabel: (seriously) �Daddy! I�m FIVE now! That�s a WHOLE hand! I want to do something fun like Avery and Brooke.� Stefan opens his mouth to object but she goes on. �I want to be in ballet too, with Avery and Serena! May I?�
Mackenzie: �That sounds like fun, Sweetie. Daddy and I will have to talk about it.�
Christabel: �Okay. I�ll go get dressed now.� She runs out of the room.
Mackenzie: (as Stefan turns to glare at her) �At least think about it, Sweetie.�
Stefan: (stubbornly) �I don�t want to think about it. I don�t want our daughter parading around in a tutu.�
Mackenzie: �Stefan! I swear, we go through this every time Christabel wants to do something new! You thought that preschool would warp her, but she�s fine! Ballet two days a week won�t kill her!� she smiles imploringly. �Stefan, just think about it! Please?�
Stefan: (smiling dispite himself) �Oh, you know that I can�t say no to you. I�ll think about it, but that�s all I am going to promise you.�
Mackenzie: (smiling victoriously) �Thank you, Stefan.� She kisses him quickly and then hops out of bed.
Stefan: �Hey! Where are you going?�
Mackenzie: �I�m going to take a shower.� She smiles. �I have a lot of things to take care of, such as costume rentals.� She starts laughing and heads into the bathroom.
Later that morning. The ACBA offices.
Scott: �This meeting is now called to order.� He grins. �I love saying that.�
Gregory: �Hey, if it floats your boat, Scott, than have fun.� He grins.
Kimberly: �I�m going to be starting Claire�s custody case next week and I�m going to need some help with the research on her ex-husband to prove that he�s an incompetent father. Lex?�
Alexis: �Sorry, I can�t. I�m going to be really busy in the next week.�
Kimberly: �Mackenzie?�
Mackenzie: �Sorry. I�m going to be in court next week.�
Gregory: �Kim, why don�t you have Jillian help you?�
Kimberly looks over at Jillian, who is staring at her nails. She smiles weakly.
Jillian: (politely) �Sure, Kimberly. I�ll help you if you�d like.�
Kimberly: (raising her eyebrows slightly) �Sure, Jillian. That would be great.�
Justin: (staring at Jillian) �Kim, do you need any more help?�
Kimberly: (obviously amused) �No, not right now, Justin, but thanks for asking.�
Scott: �There�s something else I wanted to add. I was wondering about the concept of one more lawyer added to the firm.�
Jillian: (tossing her hair) �Who is it?�
Scott: �Thirty one years old. Yale graduate. Very good. Her name is Sierra Hudson.�
Jillian: (shocked) �Hey! I know her! She was at Yale the same time as me.� she thinks. �She was in one of my pre-law classes.�
Alexis: �So, do you know anything about her legal skills? Is she good?�
Jillian: �All I remember is a mock trial we were in together. She is one hell of a speaker. So, Scott, why does she want to work for us? I mean, is she law firm shopping?�
Scott: �Actually, she called me and then we met for drinks when I was in the city last week. She is very interested in working for us.�
Gregory: �Shall we put it to a vote?� everyone nods. �All in favor of asking Sierra Hudson to join ACBA?�
Everyone: �Aye.�
Gregory: �Than it�s decided. Scott, would you like to call her later today?�
Scott: �I�d love to.� He smiles. �You guys, our law firm is really starting to kick butt!�
Jillian: �Why wouldn�t it be?� she smiles sincerely for once. �We�re great lawyers.�
Alexis and Mackenzie exchange a surprised look. Justin gazes at Jillian. Kimberly and Gregory look at each other and roll their eyes.
After the meeting.
Alexis, Mackenzie, Gregory, Kimberly and Scott have left the boardroom. Jillian and Justin lurk behind.
Justin: (picking up his notepad) �So, Jillian, how are you enjoying working here so far?�
Jillian: �It�s pretty good. You all are pretty nice.� She smirks. �So far. You?�
Justin: �I really like it. Everyone is so nice.� He looks down at the table for a moment. �So, uh, Jillian, I was wondering... would you uh... like to have dinner sometime? Alexis told me about this great French place down on the marina...�
Jillian: �Sorry, you�re not my type.�
Justin: (hurt, but trying to cover it up) �I just meant as friends.�
Jillian: �Sorry. I�m not interested.� She shrugs and heads out of the room.
Justin watches her go, his mouth hanging open slightly in surprise.
Late that afternoon. The Ashtons� house.
Alexis and Ned stand in front of their bed staring at each other. There are two garment bags sitting on the bed and Alexis� makeup case.
Ned: (looking into Alexis� eyes) �I just want you to know that I love the fact that you�re going along with this, Lex.�
Alexis: �What choice do I have?� she smiles. �It�s either this or the world knowing about you and your tattooed wife on Edward�s desk.�
Ned: (softly, his arms around her waist) �I love you, Alexis.�
Alexis: (as he nestles his face in her hair) �I love you too, Ned.�
Ned: �And how would you like it if I... uh... professed my love to you right now?�
Alexis: (looking at her watch) �We DO have twenty whole minutes before we have to leave for Stefan and Mackenzie�s.�
They smile at each other for a moment and then without another word, Ned throws Alexis back onto the bed and they make love on top of the garment bags.
Eighteen minutes later.
Alexis: (breathing heavily, her head on Ned�s chest) �That was wonderful.�
Ned: (kissing her gently, stroking her hair) �You�re a goddess.�
Alexis: �I love it when we�re spontaneous, even when we�re laying on top of a garment bag where shoes are poking me in the back.�
Ned: (holding her against him) �Sorry about that. You should have something. I would have been on the bottom.�
Alexis: (kissing his neck) �It�s okay, Baby. I�ll survive.� They wrap their arms around each other and begin kissing passionately.
Just then, there is a knock at the door.
Avery: (yelling) �Mommy! Daddy! We have to go! We�re gonna be late!�
Ned: (mumbling) �God, I wish we hadn�t taught her how to tell time.�
Alexis: (laughing) �Avery, we�ll be ready in just a minute! Can you and Brooke wait downstairs in the living room?�
Avery: �Okay, Mommy!� her footsteps can be heard running towards the stairs.
Ned: (kissing Alexis again) �Can�t we just pretend we didn�t hear her?�
Alexis: (laughing as she kisses him again and then sits up) �Sorry, Sweetie.�
Ned: (as Alexis picks her clothes up and starts putting them on) �You are a HORRIBLE wife, Alexis!� he starts laughing as she glares at him.
Alexis: (leaning over and kissing him) �You know that you come first with me, Ned. But now, we must be SLAVES, so let it be.� She smiles. �It�s going to be a blast.�
Fifteen minutes later. Wyndemere.
Mackenzie: (answering the door) �You�re late.�
Ned: �We are not. We had something to take care of.�
Mackenzie: �Whatever.� She opens the door wider and hugs her nieces as they come in. �Brooke and Avery, Christabel is waiting for you in her playroom.�
Brooke: �Yay!� she and Avery run off as Mackenzie takes Hannah.
Mackenzie: (bouncing Hannah) �Are you ready to see your mommy and daddy looking like complete morons?� she sets her down and the baby runs off.
Alexis: (barely breathing) �What do you mean?�
Mackenzie: (opening a closet and pulling out a French maid�s uniform and a butler�s uniform with a flourish) �Ta da!�
Alexis: �No. Absolutely not. Are you INSANE?�
Ned: (at the same time) �There is NO way in HELL that we�re wearing those!�
Mackenzie: (calling) �Mrs. Lansbury, can you look up Edward Quartermaine�s phone number for me, please?� she grins at Ned and Alexis. �As soon as possible?�
Ned: (growling) �All right. You win.�
A half hour later.
Ned and Alexis come downstairs holding hands. Ned is wearing the black and white butler�s uniform. Alexis is dressed in a French maid�s uniform that ends several inches above her knees, complete with hat and feather duster. Her hair is in a French braid. Both of them look completely ballistic.
Mackenzie: (seeing them coming) �Aw, you two look so sweet!� without warning, she pulls out a camera and starts taking pictures.
Alexis: (lunging at her) �Mackenzie, STOP IT!�
Mackenzie: �Nope. I do recall Ned saying that the winners could make the losers do ANYTHING they wanted.� She smiles. �Now smile pretty for the camera.�
Alexis and Ned exchange a look and then smile at Mackenzie, their teeth gritted.
Just then, Stefan walks in. He takes one look at them and starts laughing.
Ned: �Stefan, I don�t want to hear it.�
Stefan: �I was just about to comment on how wonderful you two look. Alexis, you look pretty good in that dress. I bet that Ned agrees.�
Alexis looks at Ned, who smiles at her. He winks when Stefan and Mackenzie look away.
Dinnertime. The dining room.
Mackenzie: (annoyed) �We�re waiting, you two!�
Alexis: (from the kitchen) �Just a second, sister dearest.�
Ned: (under his breath) �You are so bad!�
Alexis just smiles at him and picking up a tray with soup bowls on it, heads out of the kitchen and into the dining room.
Mackenzie: �Took you long enough.�
Alexis: (defensively) �Mrs. Lansbury wasn�t quite done cooking.�
Stefan: (as Alexis places a bowl in front of him) �Ah, watercress soup. My favorite.�
Mackenzie: �Mine too.� She raises her spoon to her lips and then pauses. �Wait a minute. What did you do to this, Alexis?�
Alexis: (solemnly) �Nothing.� She looks at her daughters and niece. �Girls, taste your soup and tell them if it tastes okay.�
Avery: (eating a little) �It tastes fine.�
Christabel: (thinking about it after eating some) �Daddy, Mommy, it�s good! It tastes just like it usually does!�
Stefan: (dipping his spoon in Christabel�s soup and tasting it) �You�re right. Mackenzie, you�re just being paranoid.�
Ned: (coming in with the salads) �How�s the soup?�
Mackenzie: (glaring at Alexis) �Just fine, according to Stefan.� She smiles a little and then lifts her spoon to her mouth. She takes some soup into her mouth and immediately spits it out. �GROSS! YUCK!�
Stefan: (spitting his out at the same time) �Yuck! What�s wrong with it?�
Alexis and Ned both shrug. Mackenzie and Stefan glare at them.
Alexis: �Shall we tell Mrs. Lansbury to go easy on the salt next time?�
Mackenzie: �You are dead meat, Alexis!�
Christabel: �Mommy, you can share mine.�
Brooke: �Uncle Stefan, you can share mine.�
Ned: �That�s awfully nice, girls. It�s good too since you have such LARGE bowls.�
He distributes the salads and then disappears back into the kitchen with Alexis.
Ned: (putting his arms around Alexis) �You�re too funny, Lex. Just how much salt did you put into their soup?�
Alexis: �I evenly distributed a cup of salt.� She grins. �It must have been pretty bad.�
Ned: (kissing her neck) �You look pretty good in this outfit.�
Alexis: (placing her hands on his backside) �Thanks. You�re pretty sexy too.� She smiles.
Ned: (letting his hands roam down to her breasts) �And you feel so good.�
Alexis: (in a sexy whisper) �Do I make you feel good?� she rubs against him, making him aroused. �Do you want me, Ned?�
Ned: (sliding his hand up her dress) �Very much so.� He gently strokes her through her satin panties. �I want you so bad.�
Alexis: (hesitantly) �What if Mrs. Lansbury comes in?�
Ned: (stroking her as he sucks on her earlobes) �She�s gone. Stefan dismissed her for the rest of the evening.�
Alexis: (kissing him gently) �You know that I go crazy when you do that.�
Ned: (whispering) �When I do what?� he smiles teasingly.
Alexis: (whispering back) �Just the touch of your fingers makes me tremble.�
Ned: (smiling) �What are you going to do about it?�
Alexis: (whispering) �Make love to me.�
Without another word, Ned pushes Alexis back onto the table. He pushes up her dress and slides off her panties.
Alexis moans slightly as he strokes her gently. She sits up to undo his pants.
Ned: (moaning as she strokes him) �You are so sexy, Alexis and...�
Alexis cuts him off by kissing him passionately, sliding her tongue into his mouth. She shudders as he enters her.
Ned: (moaning) �God, Alexis, they should have named you Grace.�
Alexis: (kissing his collarbone) �Why?�
Ned: (breathing heavily) �Because then I could call you Amazing Grace.�
Alexis: (pressing against him) �It�s a good thing that we�re married because if you ever used that to hit on me, I�d think you were insane.�
They both start laughing as they continue to make love on the table.
Just then, they hear the service bell ringing in the dining room.
Ned: (whispering) �Ignore it. It�s probably one of the kids playing with it.�
Mackenzie: (in the dining room) �Hey! Where�s our food?�
Alexis: (calling) �It�s coming.�
Ned: (moaning) �It�s not the only thing that is.�
Alexis starts laughing as her lips come down on Ned�s in a searing kiss.
At the exact same moment, they reach the edge, and scream into their kiss, hoping that Stefan and Mackenzie can�t hear them.
Stefan: (calling from the dining room) �What on earth is taking so long?�
Alexis: (trying to control her breathing) �Just a second, you guys!�
Ned: (pouting) �All I get is a SECOND more?�
Alexis: (laughing) �Consider it an opening act for later tonight.�
Ned: (considering it) �Okay, I can live with that.�
Alexis: (laughing as the service bell is rung again) �Good, because that�s all you�re going to get as long as they want their dinner.�
They both start laughing as their lips come together for one last kiss.
Five minutes later, they come into the dining room with the duck and rice on plates. They quickly serve the others and then sit down.
Mackenzie: (huffily) �Took you long enough!�
Ned: (smiling at Alexis) �Sorry about that.�
Stefan: �Next time, be a little quicker.�
Ned: (in Alexis� ear) �I don�t know if I can do that.�
Alexis: (in his ear) �I think he meant with the food.�
With that, they look at each other and start laughing.
Later that evening. The living room.
Mackenzie is on the phone with Julia.
Julia: �So how are you treating your slaves, sis?�
Mackenzie: �They�re pretty pissed off at us.� She laughs. �We accumulated quite a few dishes for them to wash.�
Julia: �Mackenzie! How would you like it if you and Stefan were in their situation?�
Mackenzie: �Seeing as that Alexis poured about a gallon of salt into our soup...�
Julia: (stifling a laugh) �Knowing you, you two deserved it.�
Jax: (in the background) �Hey, Gorgeous, who are you talking to?�
Julia: (to Jax) �Mackenzie. Get on the extension.� She smiles at him and turns back to the phone. �Mackenzie, get Stefan on the extension.�
Mackenzie: (yelling) �Stefan, Jax and Julia are on the phone! Pick up the extension!�
Stefan: (a second later, on the phone) �Hey you guys. How are you?�
Julia: �Your wife was just telling us about torturing Ned and Alexis.�
Stefan: (laughing) �We�re not torturing them. We�re having fun and they are too.�
Jax: �Why do I doubt that for some reason?� he grins at Julia. �I can�t wait for the dinner party tomorrow night. Who all is coming?�
Mackenzie: �You two, us, Claire, Gregory, Monica, Nikolas, Emily, Justin, Kimberly, Scott and of course the two slaves.� She laughs.
Julia: �Mackenzie! That�s twelve people and six kids! They�re going to die!�
Stefan: �It�s just a LITTLE party. They won�t mind.�
Jax: (snorting) �We�ll see about that tomorrow night.� He laughs. �Where are they anyway? I don�t hear anyone screaming at you.�
Mackenzie: (looking at Stefan) �Where are they?�
Upstairs. Alexis� old bedroom.
Ned and Alexis are both laying on the bed on their backs, staring up at the ceiling.
Ned is wearing navy silk pajama pants and no shirt. Alexis is wearing a pair of light blue drawstring pajama pants with white clouds on them and a light blue tank-top.
Ned: (in a low voice) �I hate my sister.�
Alexis: (mumbling) �I hate my brother.�
Ned: (sighing) �I never want to see another dish as long as I live.�
Alexis: (snuggling close to him) �But wasn�t it fun in the kitchen?�
Ned: (kissing her forehead) �Oh, definitely.� He smiles. �It was amazing, Sexy Lexi.�
Alexis: (laughing) �You�re pathetic.� She sighs. �I wonder how many people we�ll be serving dinner to tomorrow night.�
Ned: �I think it�s somewhere in the neighborhood of twelve, counting them.�
Alexis: (looking at him) �You�re kidding, right?�
Ned: �Not exactly.� He smiles. �We can handle it.�
Alexis: �Ooh, do we get to be bitchy again?�
Ned: (pulling her closer) �Actually, just the opposite.�
Alexis: �Ned, what�s the matter with you? You WANT to be NICE to them? They�re
going to put us through hell tomorrow night.
Ned: �No, no, Sweetie. You�re missing the point. We�ll be as sweet as sugar, we�ll just be how should I put this, ditzy blonde servants?�
Alexis: (laughing) �Exactly what do you mean by �ditzy blonde servants?��
Ned: �If Jax asks for a vodka, we should by all means give it to Greg. And if Mackenzie ends up with Claire�s wine, than how is it our fault? Ditto with dinner.�
Alexis: (laughing harder) �Ooh, I like it. And I bet that it will make them mad!�
Ned: �That�s the idea. They can�t complain that we�re being rude though.�
Just then, there is a knock at the door.
Ned: �Unless you�re Stefan and Mackenzie, you can come in!�
Brooke: (outside) �It�s me. Brooke. I�m not them. May I come in?�
Alexis: (laughing) �Sure. Come on in, Sweetie.�
Brooke gently comes into the room and goes over to stand by Alexis� side of the bed.
Ned: �What�s up, soccer star?�
Brooke: (blushing a little) �Daddy, I need to talk to Mommy. Alone.� She gives Alexis a look that signals that she really needs to talk to her. �Please.�
Alexis: (raising her eyebrows) �Ned, you heard her. Get out.�
Ned: (laughing) �Fine. I know when I�m not wanted.�
Brooke: �I still love you, Daddy. I NEED to talk to Mommy though.�
Ned: (kissing the top of her head) �It�s fine.� he smiles. �I�m going to go check on Hannah and Avery.�
As Ned leaves the room, Brooke climbs onto the bed next to Alexis.
Alexis: �Is something wrong, Brooke?�
Brooke: (her cheeks pink) �No. Nothing is wrong at all!� she grins a megawatt grin. �Guess what happened in school today. It�s a secret so you can�t tell Daddy.�
Alexis: (smiling) �Uh, David asked you to marry him.�
Brooke: (blushing harder) �No, but you�re close.�
Alexis: �I give up.�
Brooke: (grinning from ear to ear) �He kissed me!�
Alexis: (shocked) �He kissed you? When? Where? Why?�
Brooke: (happily) �We were playing soccer at recess and then he said he wanted to talk to me and we walked to the woods and he said that I�m a good soccer player and not just for a girl and then he kissed me.�
Alexis: (smiling at her daughter) �And then what happened?�
Brooke: (shrugging) �Rick called him to come back to the game so he ran off and I went to play on the swings with Samantha.�
Alexis: �Brooke, did you want him to kiss you?�
Brooke: �Yeah.� She smiles a little. �Is that wrong though?�
Alexis: (hugging her) �No, not at all.�
Brooke: �He�s so cute!�
Alexis: �Well, if this young man kissed my daughter, I think that I need to see just how cute he is!�
Brooke: (worried) �You won�t say anything to him, will you?�
Alexis: �Of course not.� She smiles. �So when can I meet him?�
Brooke: �Actually, I wanted to ask you something. How do you like camping?�
Alexis: �I�ve never been camping. Why?�
Brooke: �There is going to be a third and fourth grade camp out at the park near here in a few weeks. They need parents to chaperone. It�s for two nights.�
Alexis: �Is Serena going?�
Brooke: �Yeah, and so is Samantha. And David and Rick.� She smiles. �Do you want to go with me?�
Alexis: (trying to come up with a good excuse to say no) �Uh... well...� Brooke looks at her hopefully. �Sure I will, Sweetie.�
Brooke: (hugging her hard) �Thank you so much, Mommy! I have the COOLEST mom!�
Alexis: �Thanks.� She smiles. �You�re a pretty cool daughter.� She looks at her watch. �And you have to get in bed soon, so go get your pajamas on, okay?�
Brooke: �Okay.� She gets up and runs out of the room. She runs into Ned.
Ned: �Are you done talking to Mommy, squirt?� he picks her up and gives her a hug.
Brooke: �Yep. She�s going camping with my class!�
Ned: (setting her down) �Camping? Your mom? Alexis? She doesn�t go camping!�
Brooke: �Well, she told me that she would go so I guess that she does. It�s only for two days.�
Ned: (laughing) �Your mommy won�t last ONE HOUR sleeping on the ground.�
Brooke: �Go talk to her.� She grins. �She just said yes.� She runs off.
Ned: (going into their bedroom) �Alexis?�
Alexis: �She was too cute to say no to.�
Ned: �You�re going camping? This I HAVE to see.�
Alexis: �It�s only for two nights. Besides, she asked me. That genetic Ashton grin is too hard to say no to.�
Ned: (throwing back his head and laughing) �Oh brother! This is going to be good!�
Alexis: (as he throws himself down on the bed) �What�s so funny?�
Ned: �Do you want me to come along to protect you from bears and rabid snakes?�
Alexis: (rolling her eyes) �This is a residential park, Ned, not the Appalachians.�
Ned: �Well, just to be sure, what if I teach you a few survival techniques?�
Alexis: (in a low voice) �And what would those be?�
Ned: �How about I just show you?�
Alexis: �The girls... we have to put them to bed...�
Ned: (whispering) �The nanny is going to. Mackenzie decided to let us off for the rest of the night.� He rolls his eyes. �Such benevolence.�
Without another word, he peels away her clothing and begins making love to her.
Alexis: (hissing) �Ned, how is this going to keep me safe in the great outdoors?�
Ned: (laughing) �Oh, it won�t.� he smiles. �But it will give me something to think about for the two nights that you�re gone.�
Alexis: (laughing) �Ned Ashton, you�re terrible!�
Ned: �I know.� He grins. �And that�s why you love me.�
He rolls her over and they continue to make love until camping and anything else of any importance is just a distant thought.