Tom wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his
eyes and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirin next to a glass
of water on the side table. And next to them, a single red rose!

Tom gets up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.
He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly
clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he
sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror, and
notices a note on the table: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left
early to go shopping--Love you!"

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast and the
morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Tom asks, "Son ...
what happened last night?"

"Well, you came home at 3 A.M., drunk out of your mind and woke us all up.
You fell and broke some furniture, puked twice in the hallway, and cracked
your face on the sink when you were diving for the toilet"

"If that is all true, then why do I have a rose, and breakfast is on the
table waiting for me? Wasn't your mother furious?"

His son replies, "Well dad, Mom dragged you to the bedroom and when she tried
to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone lady, I'm married!"