Why Bicycles are Better

1.      Bicycles don't get pregnant
2.      You can ride bicycles any time of the month
3.      Bicycles don't have parents
4.      Bicycles don't whine unless something is really wrong
5.      You can share bicycles with friends
6.      Bicycles don't care how many other bicycles you have ridden
7.      When riding, you and your bicycle arrive at the same time
8.      Bicycles don't mind how many other bicycles you have
9.      Bicycles don't care if you look at other bicycles
10.     Bicycles don't care if you buy bicycle magazines
11.     If your bicycle goes flat you can fix it
12.     If your bicycle is too loose you can tighten it
13.     If your bicycle is misaligned you don't have to discuss politics
        with it
14.     You can have a black bicycle and bring it home to your parents
15.     You can ride other friends bicycles and remain friends
16.     If you say bad things to your bicycle you don't have to apoligise
        to it before you ride it again
17.     You can ride your bicycle for as long as you want and it won't
        get sore
18.     You can stop riding your bicycle as soon as you want and it
        won't get frustrated
19.     Your mother won't stay in touch with your bicycle after you dump it
20.     Bicycles don't get headaches
21.     Bicycles don't insult you if you are a bad rider
22.     Your bicycle never wants a night out with other bicycles
23.     Bicycles don't care if you are late
24.     You don't have to take a shower before you ride a bicycle
25.     You can ride a bicycle the first time you meet it without having
        to take it out to dinner, see amovie or meet its parents.
26.     When in mixed company you can talk about the great rides that
        you've had