Sound bites from Entertainment Weekly

"I was stunned--I thought I was the only one who went to bed wearing NIkes and
a purple shroud."  David Letterman, about the Heaven's Gate suicide.

"When pressed to reveal the real reason for his Asian visit, Gore blurted out,
'Because I can't ask them for any more money over the phone!'"  Craig Kilborn
on the Daily Show.

"Perfect. An article on aging next to an ad for vodka. Problem. Solution."
Nina (Wendie Malick), discussing a magazine layout, on Just Shoot me.

"Joanie gave Chachi a hickey.  That's as hot as it got."  Garry Marshall,
comparing Happy Days with today's sexy sitcom, on The Late Late Show with Tom
Synder.

"Martin Lawrence (is) not going to do his show anymore...He wants to spend
more time freaking out in the street."  Bill Maher on Politically Incorrect.

"Jews don't drink too much--it interferes with our suffering."  Milton Berle
on the Daily Show.

"A TV station in Alabama is refusing to air the coming out episode of Ellen.
A spokesman said, 'Homosexuality is not a topic that two cousins should watch
with their children.'"  Conan O' Brien on Late Night.