Oh, it sounds like such a great deal in economics class when the teacher is all "If you invest 10,000 dollars over a span of 10 years from the age 16 to 26, you can have over 1 million dollars 50 years later!"
Wow! 1 million dollars from 10,000?! What a fucking deal! Just one problem: I'm going to be SIXTY-FUCKING-FIVE! WHAT DO I NEED ONE MILLION DOLLARS FOR WHEN I CAN BARELY EVEN STAND UP!!? Actually, some sixty-five-year-olds are in decent physical condition, but it's definately borering on old fart, and my personal current physical status is that of about 50, I'd say. I'll be dead by the age of 35, so why should I piss all my money into some savings bond that's not going to benefit me until 30 years after I'm dead?
As I stated: Even if I do live to be 65 and recieve my 1 million dollars, what am I going to spend it on? Decks of cards and flowers for the funerals of all my dying friends? It wouldn't be cool to be a millionaire as an old person because then you'd probably leave it to someone in your will and then that person would kill you because, after all, you're just an old person. They want that fucking money!
I guess that, when you're old, the only way you can get head anymore is with money. Unless, of course, you're me; girls always have, always do, and always will want me.
But that's about the only thing. And that won't hold out for too long after then, anyway. Pretty soon, your dick will be eternally limp and your entire groin region will most likely be at a constant level of relative paralysis.
So you see all kinds of old people driving around in convertibles and whatever other expensive cars are currently in circulation, right? Well THERE'S something you could put your money into, except old people can't drive worth Jack Shit in a shopping cart going over niagra falls. Why should they be able to buy these cars if all they're going to do with them is kill innocent little babies? Well... Nevermind...
Speaking of old people having money... What's up with senior citizen discount? Is it some sort of reward for being able to torture yourself and others constantly with your existance for long enough? Look, old people have millions of dollars from retirement funds. Why aren't I the one getting discounts over here? I'm the poor one who's just starting out, and 1000 of my monthly dollars are going into my stupid retirement savings funds anyway.
Well not for me, America.
Now, you may be thinking, "Leus! Old people have lots of medical problems, so if I'm rich when I'm old, then I can pay off all my medical bills!"
Well that's all fine and dandy, except for one thing: Why would you want to continue to live as an old person with health problems if you couldn't live previously because you were too busy saving up to be able to live as an old person with health problems? Yeah, that's right. Eat my shit. You might as well spend your money like fuck and then blow your brains out when you dig yourself too deep into debt. That's the way to do things 'round here.
~C is for cookie. That's good enough for me.~
Back to further enlightenment.