Chapter 217: Tangers XX

A/N: All thanks to Jad and ESPN the Magazine! And the Peron plant does not exist and it does not grow exclusively in Argentina.

 

Chapter 217: Tangers XX—Fast and Loose

 

 

            I woke up and I was unusually warm, and my head was clanging, my mouth was dry and just the thin cut of light slipping in through my curtains was killing me. I swallowed, and cringed and then I heard the snores. I closed my eyes. I had to be imagining things. Someone was snoring in the bed with me….. and someone else was breathing rhythmically in sleep, there were two people in the bed with me? I scrunched my face up and tried not to think about it… until I recognized a third set of snores… they were deep, and undeniably male.

            What the…?

            I whimpered and opened my eyes and saw the mop of blond hair on the pillow next to me, the rest was covered with my blanket and I saw a thin set of fingers peeking up from underneath it. I whimpered again and I looked to my other side and I saw a butter blond bob, her naked… OH MY GOD NAKED back facing me, and I could see each of her vertebrae and the little moles dotting her skin. I squeaked and sat up and saw a man lying across the foot of my bed, his arm tossed across his face and my hand flew to my mouth. Just then I heard the toilet in my bathroom flush and that of course made me realize that someone was….

            I sat there, staring at the bathroom door until it opened and out walked a plump, brunette a pretty smile and she was dressed in MY t-shirt. I squeaked again.

            “Good morning!” she said with a grin. “Up so early, Tiger?”

            “Eeeeps!” I replied.

            She laughed, “Oh gawd, you still have that look on your face!”

            “Look?” I asked.

            She nodded. “Like you just walked in on your sister’s shower, that kind of look.”

            I frowned and couldn’t recall a thing about yesterday. I shook my head. “Who are you?” I asked.

            The brunette rolled her eyes and half grinned at me, she crossed her soft, tanned, plump arms over her breast. “Well at least you’re honest about not remembering, I know you’re not full of it then.”

            I shrugged.

            “I’m Linda,” she said, “The girl that could use a good conditioner on your left is Candy, and the doll on your right is Clarissa. Ring a bell?”

            I frowned and pulled up the blanket covering Candy’s face and she had make up smeared all over and she looked kinda blotchy… and she did look kinda familiar. I then leaned over and peered at Clarissa’s face, she also looked kinda familiar. I nodded, “I think I recognize them,” and I peered at Linda, “and you look familiar too.”

            She shook her head. “If it weren’t for that cute accent of yours I’d classify you with all the other man-pigs, you know that?”

            I shrugged again, feeling really embarrassed. I mean I couldn’t even remember what had happened! I looked at my palms and noticed some pink smudging on my wrists, lipstick? I wrinkled my nose and peered at it and then I felt my cheeks redden, how embarrassing! It was lipstick smeared on my body!

            “The other guy,” Linda continued and she pointed at the snoring man on my bed. “I don’t know who he is, I assume he’s your friend?”

            I shrugged and leaned over to the man, grateful when I realized that I was still in my boxers. I pressed my hand into his naked shoulder and rolled him towards me. When I saw his face and smelt his alcohol rank breath I cringed and sat back.

            “Oh yeah!” I said, “now I remember.”

            “Well that’s always good,” Linda replied.

 

 

            Life was pretty much ordinary for me when I started off yesterday. I had my breakfast, I did my crossword puzzle and I watched some television. It was a day off from practice and I had decided to spend it quietly indoors. I was pleasantly surprised to read in Penny Parker’s column that Noter had proposed to Cecile. It’s always great to hear things like that and maybe that was just the thing to get Noter’s mind of the Roy family. So I called Danny.

            “Heya,” Danny said as he answered the phone.

            “Hi Danny,” I said, “I read it in the paper today, congratulations!”

            “Huh?” Danny asked and I could tell he was really sleepy.

            “You know,” I said, “The engagement.”

            “WHAT!” Danny exclaimed. “How did you find out? Did Cecile tell you?”

            I smiled. “No,” I said. “But one of Penny Parker’s spies saw ya propose and it’s in the newspaper.”

            “Woah,” Danny said. “Hey that’s kinda cool.”

            I laughed. “So have you set the date?”

            There was a long pause and then I remembered that most guys don’t like to talk about “the date”. Somehow I didn’t think that Danny of all people would mind that so much. He didn’t seem like the extra macho afraid of commitment type I mean geez he was staying steady and faithful and abstinent with Cecile.

            “Yeah,” he said in a slow, suddenly somber voice, “I’d love to but Cecile wants to tell her mother first.”

            I frowned and remembered something about the “forbidden affair” he was having with her. I couldn’t see why Cecile’s mother wouldn’t like Danny. I mean he sometimes annoyed me but really he was a decent fellow. I bet if I brought Danny home to my dear mother, she’d die of happiness to meet him and call him “son” until she remembered that I was her son too.

            “Is she going to?” I asked.

            “Yeah,” Danny said brightly, “I think she’s finally gonna do it and it will be a HUGE weight off her shoulders once she sees that there was never anything to worry about. Her momma’s gonna love me so much she won’t know what hit her and then I can finally introduce her to my mom so she can stop worrying about me not having had a date in the last four years. I’m really excited Tang. But..”

            “But?” I prompted him.

            “But I don’t… I mean what if she backs out again, and doesn’t want to tell her mother about me what does that mean?” he asked.

            I simply said the truth as I saw it. “That can’t be a good sign,” I said, “But if she really loves you I’m sure she’ll tell her mother, it’ll be fine.”

            “Yeah,” Danny said, “It will be. Hey I’m so thankful for her you know? I mean when I think about it… I could have played my life all fast and loose these past years, gotten mixed up with girls and hard liquor and all that shit, and you know if it weren’t for her. I mean I could have lost my focus years ago and not even made the team or anything.”

            After we hung up, I sat back on my couch flipping through channels. Well it was only a little after eleven. What now? To tell you the truth I was pretty bored at that point. Too bad it wasn’t a weekend because at least then I could go over to the Roy’s house and play with the kids.

            I was just at the point of pondering my boredom when there was a knock on my door and I yawned as I answered it.

            “Rick!” I exclaimed.

            “Hey Tangs!” Rick Berry said, “Can I come in?”

            “Sure,” I said.

            Our next game at home was to be against the Washington Capitals the next night and Berry was on that team. He was a rookie here a year ago and he was a really fun, party hard sorta guy and I was really sad to see him traded when he had been. I can’t say that I could actually keep up with Berry, however, because Rick was just so hyper he made me sleepy. In fact, have you ever heard of that dog where the Russian scientist trained it to drool when a bell rang? Well, with Berry he had me conditioned to get incredibly sleepy at just the sight of him.
            “So what’s up?” I asked through a yawn.

            Berry laughed, “Why the hell are you always sleepy whenever we talk? It’s hilarious!”

            I shrugged, “Wanna beer?” I asked through another yawn.

            Berry laughed. “Nah I got my own drink. Hey Tangs, I was gonna go hop around town, maybe hit a few of those jazz clubs before they get too crowded at night, but you know how I hate to do it alone. So you with me?”

            Jazz clubs?? When Rick was with us it was always those swing clubs he was into, now it was jazz! I yawned again, “I don’t know,” I said, “I mean I’m kinda sleepy and I would probably be a drag and…”

            “Not a problem my friend!” Berry exclaimed and he pressed a tall, thin can of something into my hand. I frowned and lifted it to my face, peered at the dark red label. It screamed BRAWN in big yellow letters.

            “What is this?” I asked. “Like vodka or something?” I wasn’t in the mood to be drinking.

            “Nah it’s like for energy,” Berry said. “It PUMPS you up.”

            I sniffed it. A vaguely herby, citusy smell to it. “So it has a lot of caffeine?” I asked. “Is it coffee?”

            “Not caffeine from coffee,” Berry said in a proud voice. “It comes from the leaves of the Peron plant. It grows exclusively in Argentina, it’s sweet stuff, a lot of caffeine and some other stuff in it too.”

            I frowned. “Other stuff? Rick I don’t know about this.”

            Berry shrugged. “Just try it, if you don’t like it then don’t finish it. I can guarantee you’ll like it.”

            “Oookay,” I said and I took a long sip of it. At first I wanted to gag on it but it shot so quickly down my throat and I felt like I was in one of those cartoons where they drink the coffee and one eye just POPS open and they don’t stop drinking.

            “Yeah,” Berry grinned. “The stronger version of it is pretty cool too, Juno-14 have you tried that?”

            Juno-14? That sounded familiar and it occurred to me that it was something that had caused trouble for someone I knew… but none of that mattered as I felt my blood dancing in my veins and a weird fizzy feeling in my mouth.

            “Still wanna hit those clubs?” Berry asked.

            I crushed the can in my hand and grabbed Berry’s arm, dragging him after me as I grabbed my shoes and jacket. “We’rewastingtimewegottagoit’sfunwegottarunm,” I babbled and I think I remembered Berry laughing, “thiswillbesocoolicantwait!”

            “Slow down Tangs!” Berry chided me and I looked at him, aware that I was probably twitching a bit like Patty on a bad day.

            I could tell my tongue was dangling fast and loose from the top of my mouth but at that point I didn’t care.

            “Slowdownwhatthehellforthere’sawholeworldoutthereletseat!”

 

            “It’s all coming back to you?” Linda asked.

            I shrugged. “A little bit,” I said. “I just remember leaving the house with Rick. But… I only kinda recognize you girls.”

            Linda grinned. “It’s okay kid, we left you a memento.” She leaned over and kissed me on the top of my head. At first I was confused about what she had just said and then I looked up from the bed and saw the tripod, and the camera.

            “Um.,” I squeaked. “Was that thing running all night?”
            “As long as the batteries lasted,” Linda whispered.

            “Eeeps!” I squeaked.

            Linda rolled her eyes again. “There you go again, with that LOOK!”