Chapter 156: Jonathan XIII—Lip Gloss

 

            “Well behave then! Both of YOU!” Jonathan snapped and he crossed his arms over his chest and sulked. This was terrible! Not only had Danny, Nick, and Scott got themselves invited to Elena’s sister’s birthday party, but now Mom had decided that there was no reason why Jana and Frederick couldn’t go as well. Before Jonathan could put up much of a fuss, she had promptly got on the phone with Elena’s mom, OK’d it and taken the three of them to the mall to get some presents.

            Jana and Freddy were both giggling in the backseat and being noisy and just plain annoying! Jonathan told them to behave but like that would work. They were just dying to embarrass him in front of Elena he knew it.

            Elena’s sister was turning nine so it hadn’t been that hard to just pick out the prettiest Barbie stuff on the shelf, have it wrapped at the counter and then dash to the car. Mom had gotten the directions to Elena’s house, but she wasn’t accustomed to the area so there was still a chance she could get lost. It seemed like it took forever as Mom drove out of the city and into the wide-open scenery of the plains. The ground was flat and covered in snow, the foothills, scarred with new communities of houses rolled in the background and the horizon loomed with the huge snow covered mountains.

            Elena had talked a little about her home at school. Her family lived on a ranch property near Lookout Mountain.

            “Oooo Mommy!” Jana breathed, “My ears are popping!”

            “It’s the altitude,” Mom said as she drove off the highway onto the sideroad, peering at the numbers on mailboxes that sat on long, thin roads leading to farms and ranches.

            “The attitude?” Jana asked. “Does the mountain have a bad attitude to make my ears pop?”

            “Altitude!” Jonathan snapped. “Not attitude!”

            “Jonathan,” Mom said. “Be nice.”

            “Look, Mom!” Freddy exclaimed. “3987, isn’t that it?”

            Jonathan saw the mailbox and Mom said something as she turned the car down the road. Within the minute they saw the large, house, the cars parked all over the front, the balloons tied on the porch and large banner over the front of it that read, “Happy Birthday Callista!”

            “Donkeys!” Jana squealed. “They have tiny donkeys! Eeeeeeeee!”

            Jonathan peered to the side of the house and he could see a few miniature donkeys with brightly colored blankets tied over their backs lounging at the side of the house, mouthfuls of hay in their mouth.

            “Ooo how sweet!” Mom said. “How nice for you!”

            As they were crawling out of the car Jonathan heard her voice. “Jonathan! Hi!”

            Jonathan saw Elena jogging out of the house, a smile on her face. “Hey, Elena!” he called back. At that point he hardly cared whether Jana and Frederick were coming with him or not.

            When they went into the house, they were greeted by the sight of Elena’s brothers and sisters, all eight of them, at least twenty other guests and adults. There seemed to be a Twister game in progress and about five small dogs came running up to them, yipping and wagging their tails.

            “Hello, Mrs. Roy!” Elena’s mother, Malena Ruiz said as she came out of the kitchen, her amber eyes were sparkling and friendly. “Glad you can make it!”

            “Oooh but I have to be going,” Mom said. “I will pick up the children later, but what a charming house you have, and donkeys? Are those babies?”

            Mrs. Ruiz nodded. “Yeah we have some mini-donkeys that’s as big as they get. We also have some tiny ponies and goats. What a shame you can’t stay!”

            Mom shook her head. “I would love to but is impossible. I have to be back in the city, the men are having a “picture” session, and us ladies, well we must oversee it. In the name of charity!”

            With final kisses and hugs to everyone, Mom left.

            Jonathan grinned at Elena and she smiled back. “So where’s the birthday girl?” he asked. She was wearing a sparkly lip-gloss today that looked so edible! He bet that is was something fruity flavored....

            “In the bathroom,” Elena replied and then she looked down at Jana who was tugging at her arm. “Hi there.”

            “Can I see your donkeys?” Jana asked in an awed voice.

            “Mmm-hmm,” Elena said. “Let me get my jacket.”

                There were three stalls on the property and Jonathan was just as tickled as Jana was about the animals. The miniature ponies, goats and donkeys were too funny to watch and they also had a herd of llamas and horses. Elena promised Jana that when the weather got warmer that she would let her ride whatever she wanted.

            “Do you ever have baby donkeys?” Jana asked as they were walking back to the house. Jonathan looked around at the pine trees all over the property. It was a forest all around and he could hear the snow falling from trees and clumping onto the ground. It would be kind of creepy to live here....

            “Yes,” Elena said. “We had two at first and then they’ve had a few babies over the years. We also breed rabbits, we have them in the barn, do you want to see those?”

            “What kind?” Jana asked.

            “Lop ear, fluffy white ones, they’re pretty cute,” Elena answered.

            “Do they have pink eyes?” Jana asked and Jonathan felt a little squeamish.

            “Yup,” Elena said. “Most of them.”

            “Noooo!” Jana snapped. “Those scare me.”

            “OK,” Elena said. There was an incredulity in her voice.

            “We’re all kinda scared of those kind of rabbits,” Freddy said.

            “Really?” Elena said and she looked at Jonathan, “Why?”

            Jonathan shook his head, not knowing exactly what to tell her until his sister interrupted him.

            “Deer!” Jana squealed.

            Jonathan saw them too. Long graceful lines, slim and fast, the herd bounded away into the trees at the sound of his sister’s squeal. Their hooves made deep, plopping sounds in the snow, crunching as they disappeared.

            “We get them around the house,” Elena said. “Come on let’s get back before they forget about us.”

            Elena’s mother was a Greek woman; her father Phil was Mexican. As a result, both sides of the family were reflected in the food that was sprawled on the dinner table none of it was the least bit familiar to Jonathan or to his siblings. He almost felt a sense of panic not knowing if he would even like any of the food, which he could tell Mrs. Ruiz, had spent a long time making. He knew that he could fake liking it and swallow it down and Freddy ate anything offered to him without question... it was Jana he was worried about. She would make no bones about insulting the chef if she so deemed it necessary.

            “Hungry?” Elena asked.

            “Sure,” Jonathan said as brightly as he could, staring at a pot of soup that had a smell similar to burning rubber wafting from it. He could feel his cheeks beginning to flush.

            A grin slowly spread over Elena’s face. “Want some soup,” she said. “It’s reeeally good.”

            “Ewwwwwwwwww!” Jana squealed and Jonathan’s pulse began to race. “What’s that? YUCKY!”

            “Jana!” he exclaimed, “Don’t be mean!”

            Mrs. Ruiz walked into the kitchen, her plump hands over her wide hips. She didn’t look angry though, just amused. “What are you yucking at?” she asked.

            Jana pointed at a plate that had a pile of what looked like slimy, green, pods on it. Her nose was wrinkled as a girl that looked a little younger than her came running into the kitchen and slid one onto her plate. She looked at Jana with bright, amber eyes glowing on a dark brown face. “Hi!” she said. “I’m Callista, this is MY party! Wanna play?”

            Jana smiled. “HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I’m Jana and I’m hungry! But those things look GROSS!”

            “Then don’t eat ‘em,” Callista said.

            “But I don’t wanna die of not eating!” Jana exclaimed a quiver to her lip.

            Jonathan heard Elena giggle.

            “Eat the sopapillas,” Callista replied. “And the Baklava.”

            The girls seemed to be automatic friends at that point and were chattering and giggling as they began to pile more food onto plates. Jonathan noted with some worry that Jana seemed to be selecting only sticky, sugary foods for her plate.

            “Well I want to try the green things,” Freddy declared, stabbing one with his fork and plopping it onto the plate. He had a game face as he picked it up and took a bite and he hadn’t even finished biting when the utter horror of what he had in his mouth hit him.

            “Grape leaves,” Mrs. Ruiz said with a laugh. “You don’t have to finish it, they’re a little strong for people not raised on them.”

            “Blah!” Freddy gasped as he spat it back on the plate with a blue tint to his face. “Sorry!”

            Jonathan cringed. Now they were looking like real Neanderthals to them he supposed. Just great!

            “Here,” Mrs. Ruiz said sliding some gooey cheese enchiladas onto a plate and handing them to Freddy. “Kids always love these.”

            Freddy grinned. “These look great!” He leaned back against the wall stabbing into the enchiladas and forking a huge, bite, dripping with cheese into his mouth. The delight in his eyes was immediate. “Good!” he exclaimed with his mouth full.

            Jonathan’s stomach roared. He wanted some of those! He made a move to the platter on the table and Elena stopped him. “Hey, wait a minute!”

            Jonathan looked at her and saw to his complete horror that she was holding out to him a bowl of that rubbery smelling soup, complete with spoon.

            “It’s Menudo,” she said. “Dad makes it, and it’s really good. Trust me, you’ll love it.”

            Well, it didn’t look like the expression on her face was evil or trying to deceive him in any way. Still... the soup did smell like rubber!

            “Cool,” Jonathan said with a squeak in his voice and he took the warm bowl from her hands. “Smells great...” He dipped the spoon into the soup and stirred it. It looked like corn floating and swirling in the dark, brown broth, and globs of something else, something almost spongy looking.

            “Go on, take a bite!” Elena said.

            Summoning up all the bravery he could, Jonathan took a deep breath and getting a hearty spoonful he shoveled it into his mouth. The broth was the first thing he tasted and it was delicious! It was nothing at all like the smell. It was rich and savory and it was slightly spicy but not too much. He began chewing at the solid pieces and the corn easily fell apart in his teeth but the spongy pieces, those wouldn’t. They were squishy and rubbery and he was wondering if they hadn’t been cooked all the way through. Maybe it was like sushi and you just had to swallow the icky raw parts. So he swallowed. Everything went down easily and all in all Jonathan had to admit that it wasn’t bad at all. He could do without the squishy pieces but shit, it didn’t even smell that bad anymore.

            “Wow!” he exclaimed. “This is pretty good! What are the squishy parts though?”

            He took another mouthful, not chewing as much, just gulping it down, his stomach impatient for more.

            “Oh that’s cow tripe,” Elena said. “You know, cow stomach.”

            He was in the midst of swallowing a mouthful when Elena’s comment registered with him. His stomach gurgled and he squinted with tear filled eyes. “What?” he gasped.

            Frederick he could hear laughing.

            “Cow tripe,” Elena repeated. “It’s the stomach all chopped up.” And now her smile was wicked. “Good huh?”

            Jonathan’s mouth went tight and then he realized how pleasant his tongue was feeling, craving that spicy broth. She had been trying to shock him, to see what he would do. He promptly dug in again and swallowed another delicious bite of soup. “Mmmm!” he said. “Really good!”

            Elena was still smiling and she dipped the huge soup ladle into the pot. “Didja see the pigs feet?”

            Freddy’s laughter got louder. “PIGS FEET!” he choked. “Jonathan ate PIGS FEET!”

            Jonathan felt the panicked queasiness in his gut again and he was praying that Elena had only been kidding when he leaned over the pot and peeked. Sure enough, he could see the blackened hooves of pig feet bobbing and sinking into the soup. But now his lips were coated with that delicious spicy taste, and it hardly mattered. “Tastiest trotters there ever was!” Jonathan declared taking another bite. “Freddy you really gotta try some!”

            “No way!” Freddy said. “I got what I want right here!”

            Jonathan looked at Elena and he couldn’t help but laugh.

            “I’m sorry!” Elena giggled. “You don’t have to keep eating it I just love seeing people freak out when they find out what it is."

            Jonathan shook his head. “This is good! Really I love it.”

            From the soup to the enchiladas to the Gyros to the Baklava, Jonathan began to make his presence known at the birthday buffet table. Elena didn’t nearly as much as he did, Jonathan noticed. She just seemed to nibble and peck at everything.

            “Come on!” Jonathan exclaimed. “Get a plate and EAT!”

            “Oh no,” Elena said rubbing her hand over her narrow tummy, “I have ballet tomorrow, it would TOTALLY show.”

            “Your loss,” Jonathan said as he injected his sopapilla with honey.

            They could hear all the singing and squeals in the other room, it seemed to be getting rowdier by the second. “I wonder what they’re doing now?” Jonathan said.

            “ONE!” Everyone yelled.

            There was a round of laughter and Jonathan could easily pick out the sound of his sister’s shrill laugh.

            “The pinata!” Elena said. “I LOVE when we put the Mexican themes to birthdays!”

            They went into the next room and sure enough, little Callista had a blindfold on and she was swinging breathing heavily, holding a small baseball bat in her hand. The fluorescent pink pinata shaped like a donkey was swinging with only a small hole in it.

            “You only get three swings before it’s someone else’s turn,” Elena said to him.

            Callista swung again and missed completely almost spinning in a full circle.

            “TWO!” Everyone yelled and there was more giggling.

            “COME ON!” Jana squealed. “HIT HER HARD!”
            Callista swung again making a brush against the pinata and gouging another hole into it spraying a few pieces of candy onto the floor.

            “Come on!” Phil Ruiz barked with a smile on his face, “Hit it baby, if no one can break it then no candy for anyone!”

            There was a scared gasp from the crowd of children.

            “He’s not kidding,” Elena whispered into Jonathan’s ear. “Last time none of us could

Links to other sites on the Web