Chapter 219: Jo VII—The Tiger
Josefina was not that much of a vivid dreamer; she always forgot her dreams just as she was waking, not caring too much about what they were about. This one was different. She felt the warmth almost as if she were truly there. Jo was confused at first. She was standing in a blank room, bright light everywhere and she frowned. This had to be a dream.
She heard the roar and she startled but didn’t wake. She pressed her hand over her breast, realizing she was naked and felt embarrassed. She looked at the tiger that had suddenly appeared in the room, huge, orange, vivid black stripes.
Jo gasped but couldn’t find the strength to scream. Instead she stared at the beast, knowing that it could tear her naked flesh to shreds and she crouched on the white floor. It approached her.
You’re dreaming!
It roared again.
It can’t hurt you, not in your dreams.
It lowered its head and stared at her with large blue eyes.
Don’t let it scare you, not in your own brain.
Josefina ran her tongue across her lips, stared at her long, thin brown arm as she reached for the Tiger, felt the heat of its breath on her fingers and she felt a twinge of fear knowing that it could snap off her entire hand. It growled, and it pressed the side of its huge head against her fingers. Josefina laughed at the soft fur, the heavy bones of its jaw and how it was acting just like an affectionate housecat.
Nice kitty! She whispered. Nice!
Jo opened her eyes. It was dark in the bedroom; she could feel the heat from Peter as he slept heavily under the covers next to her. She smiled and she reached over on the bed, ran a finger through his thick hair. He groaned in a voice like a growl and he turned over, muttered something in Swedish, and began to breathe heavily.
What do you want with him? Josefina thought as she sat on the couch, her mail on her lap. Her father had been forwarding it to Peter’s address and Peter didn’t seem to mind. He had agreed readily when she had asked him if it could be sent here and expressed his surprise that she hadn’t done it sooner. What a sweetheart he was.
She sighed as she looked at the fat envelopes and slim ones, all of them unopened. What do you want with him? You haven’t let him touch you since it happened, you sleep with him, you cry in his arms, you laugh with him, you eat with him, you watch his games, but you won’t make love to him. What do you want? What are you afraid of? Why can’t you open up for him again?
“Anything good?” Peter asked as he boiled some oatmeal in the kitchen.
“Bills,” Jo said. “Bills, bills and more bills… credit card…” She sighed. “I shouldn’t have let Anthony take over that job, I could use the money now.”
“Can you get it back?” Peter asked, there was a tone of concern in his voice.
“Nah,” Jo said. “The group likes working with a man over a woman so now it’s going real well. I don’t want to mess it up… omigod…” Jo stared at the address on the slim envelope. That’s the point, it was a slim envelope, not a fat one, her heart stopped.
“What’s wrong?” Peter asked and he appeared from the kitchen.
Jo gnawed on her bottom lip and ripped open the envelope, slid out the sheet of paper.
…..although we cannot use your submission at this time we are interested in your resume and your style of writing. We would love to see more samples of your work as we are considering a new column for our magazine….
Josefina smiled. “Peter!” She exclaimed. “They want to see more of my writing!”
Peter raised his eyebrows. “That’s great, erm… who does?”
Jo laughed. “The Tiger, it’s the most competitive literary market magazine out there. I sent them an article months ago on race relations within women’s oh nevermind it would just bore you and apparently it bored them, but, they want to see more of my stuff for an essay column they’re beginning… Oh is this boring?”
Peter smiled, gleaming white teeth, melting her heart. “No I’m happy for you,” he said as he came to her, leaned over the coach and kissed the top of her head. “I didn’t know you were that serious about writing though. Would this magazine pay a lot?”
“Hoo yea!” Jo exclaimed, reaching up and patting Peter’s furred cheek, feeling his heavy jaw bone. “They pay a ton.. and yes I love my writing, but it doesn’t pay well as you know, and I have to do work for my dad to make ends meet… this could be HUGE!”
“MMM..” Peter said in a growling voice as he hugged her tightly, kissing the side of her neck, “They better hold onto you, or else they’re stupid.”
Jo giggled and closed her eyes, inhaling the smell of him, feeling his massive body pressing into her. For a moment she was frightened… what was she scared of? Something about him, inside him, was scaring her. “Peter!” she exclaimed. “How weird!”
“What is?” Peter asked and he let go of her and sat down on the arm of the couch.
“Last night I had this weird dream, and I never dream,” she said, “About this tiger and I was scared of it and then I got the courage to pet it…”
Peter nodded. “Cool, it was prophetic.”
“I guess,” Jo said looking at the paper. “How weird. I gotta call my dad!”
Jo was in a
rather somber mood as she sat in her luxury seat at the
Jo had never really liked children before, but she pressed her hand against her empty tummy, her empty womb and she held her breath, blew it out. I don’t have that anymore, and it’s probably best. She wrinkled her nose when she caught a glimpse of the nanny’s face.
Peter had told her earlier in the day that Danny Hinote had proposed to the girl. The girl was obviously glowing with the happiness. Jo had never been proposed to before. She had always scoffed at the idea of marriage and when a relationship she was in seemed to be going towards “that question” she usually ended it. Now, for some reason, she felt hurt to the core when Peter told her the news, and it hurt to congratulate the girl, smile at her, and squeeze her hand.
What do I want? Jo thought, what am I sulking for?
She didn’t want to spend the entire evening thinking about it and was relieved to hear that lovely, purring voice.
“Hello everyone!”
“Meeeee-Meee!” Mitchell Sakic giggled and he ran to Michele Roy, hugging her around the legs before the little boy let go of her and hugged the little blond Jana.
Oh Christ! Josefina thought when she saw Michele dressed in a chic black, skin tight, long sleeved shirt and slim fitting, jeans. There was something about this French Bird and Jo had to look away to compose herself for a minute. I am self destructive!
` “We just came up for a visit,” Michele said cheerily to Debbie and the women hugged. “Jana wanted to play with Mitchell, is that fine if I leave her up here for a little bit?”
“Of course it is,” Debbie said. “Mitchell would love a playmate!”
Jo looked at the ice, at the players who were spilling out onto it for the preskate. She saw immediately Peter’s auburn hair as they skated a lap around their end of the ice and she sighed. What will I do with him? What do I want from him?
Jo startled when she felt Michele’s arms slide around her from behind, her lips on her cheek. “Bon Jour,” she whispered into her ear. “How are you doing today Miss Exquisite?”
Jo felt her cheeks burn and she wriggled out of Michele’s grasp, looked into her smiling face, “Just fine,” she said, her heart pulsing out of control. “And you?”
“Never as good as you my love,” Michele said with a laugh, “Not with that man of yours.”
Jo rolled her eyes. “What?”
“OOO!” Michele cooed, “Look at him right now, on that ice!”
Jo frowned and looked at the ice. She took the slim binoculars Michele had handed to her and peered at Peter. He was stretching on the ice, looking as if he were straddling a…. well the way he was moving was so forceful and the thrusts were… “Oh Lord!” Jo exclaimed and she laughed as she looked at Michele. “He can’t be serious.”
Michele winked and giggled. She spoke in a low voice, “What a man he is, if you do not mind me saying Josefina, he’s so big and red like…. Like like a Tiger! I can just imagine him growl. Ooo how scary!”
“A tiger?” Jo exclaimed feeling surprised and irritated. “Tiger? Peter?”
“Mmhmm,” Michele replied with a smile.
Jo rolled her eyes. “Not Peter! He’s so whiny, and self doubting and insecure and you should see him when he gets tears in his eyes. Ha!”
Michele giggled. “For certain?”
“Yah!” Jo said crossing her arms. “He’s not a tiger he’s more like…. Like a big baby.” Michele laughed again and just the sound of it tickled Jo’s heart. God I’m a slut! Jo thought.
“Well,” Michele said. “I’ll be going to my seat before Patrick thinks I’ve abandoned him and I’ll see you around yes?”
“Sure,” Jo said and she watched the Frenchwoman hug her daughter and leave the luxury box. She then looked again at the ice, at Peter. Tiger? How silly! More like a big teddy bear.
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