MANLAW
173) Drink one girly drink in public and you will forever be known as the guy who drinks girly drinks. 174) After your sixth drink, do not look at yourself in the mirror. It will shake your confidence. 175) It is only permissible to shout 'woo-hoo!' if you are doing a shot with four or more people. 176) If there is a d.j., you can request a song only once per night. If he doesn't play it within half an hour, do not approach him again. If he does play it, do not approach him again. 177) Learn how to make a rose out of a bar napkin. You'll be surprised how well it works. 178) If you can't afford to tip, you can't afford to drink in a bar. Go to the liquor store. 179) If you owe someone twenty dollars or less, you may pay them back in beer. 180) If you have been roommates with someone more than six months, you may drink all their beer, even if it's hidden, as long as you leave them one. You can have a shot of their hard liquor only if the cap has been cracked and the bottle goes for less than $25. 181) The only thing that tastes better than free liquor is stolen liquor. 182) If you bring shitty beer to a party, you must drink at least two cans before you start drinking anything better. 183) Learn to appreciate hangovers. If it was all good times every jackass would be doing it. 184) Try one new brand of beer or mixed drink each week. 185) If you are the bar's sole customer, you are obliged to make small talk with the bartender until he stops acknowledging you. Then you're off the hook. The same goes for him. 186) Never tip with coins that have touched you. If your change is $1.50, you can tell the barmaid to keep the change, but once she has handed it to you, you cannot give it back. To a bartender or cocktail waitress, small change has no value. 187) You can tell how hard a drinker someone is by how close they keep their drink to their mouth. 188) Being drunk is feeling sophisticated without being able to say it. 189) It's okay to drink alone. 190) Men don't drink from straws. 191) If you do a shot, finish it. If you don't plan to finish it, don't accept it. 192) Never play more than three songs by the same artist in a row. 193) If you think you might be slurring a little, then you are slurring a lot. If you think you are slurring a lot, then you are not speaking English. 194) For every drink, there is a five percent better chance you will get in a fight. There is also a three percent better chance you will lose the fight. 195) Fighting an extremely drunk person when you are sober is hilarious. 196) If you are broke and a friend is buying your drinks, you must laugh at all his jokes and play wingman when he makes his move. 197) If you are trading rounds with a friend and he asks if you're ready for another, always say yes. Once you fall out of sync you will end up buying more drinks than him. 198) If you're going to hit on a member of the bar staff, make sure you tip well before and after, regardless of her response. 199) Asking a bartender what beers are on tap when the handles are right in front of you is the equivalent of saying, �I'm an idiot.� 200) If there is ever any confusion, the fuller beer is yours. 201) The patrons at your local bar are your extended family, your fathers and mothers, your brothers and sisters. Except you get to sleep with these sisters. And if you're really drunk, the mothers. 202) It's acceptable, traditional in fact, to disappear during a night of hard drinking. You will appear mysterious and your friends will understand. If they even notice.
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