* She is not a BLEACHED BLONDE - She is PEROXIDE DEPENDENT.
* She is not a BAD COOK - She is MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE.
* She is not HALF NAKED
- She is WARDROBE IMPAIRED.
* She is not a SCREAMER
or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.
* She is not EASY -
She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
* She does not TEASE
or FLIRT - She engages in ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION.
* She is not DUMB -
She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
* She does not HAVE
A MOUSTACHE - She is IN TOUCH WITH HER MASCULINE SIDE.
* She does not WEAR
TOO MUCH PERFUME - She commits FRAGRANCE ABUSE.
* She does not GET
YOU EXCITED - She causes TEMPORARY BLOOD DISPLACEMENT.
* She is not KINKY
- She is a NON-INHIBITED SEXUAL COMPANIION.
* She is not an AIR
HEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.
* She does not get
DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
* She is not COLD or
FRIGID - She is THERMALLY INACCESSIBLE.
* She is not HORNY
- She is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.