April 29, 2002 - I want to learn Japanese. I also want to learn Portugese. I still need to improve my Spanish fluency. Sometimes I think that I don't even speak English all that well. I feel like these may be worthy desires, rather than wanting new furniture, a new video game, or new clothes (all of which we probably need, actually). These desires for more knowledge are very time-consuming, though. If I get a new pair of jeans or maybe some new chanclas (which I need also), I can be in a short-lived state of bliss until they get worn or until I see some new stuff that I start to want. If, on the other hand, I turn my desires to knowledge, I will surely get pleasure from the quest, but it will span my lifetime becuase I can never know anything fully. This would eliminate the instant-gratification factor completely. I guess anything wirth doing will take time, though, huh?

Then, once I've learned antoher language, what would I use it for. It would take an entirely new process of goals and accomplishments to even get to go Brazil or Japan in order to immersse myself in the language (I can immerse myself in Eglish and Spanish here in Texas with no difficulty).

So the question I end up asking myself is, 'would it be better to go for long-term fulfillment, or short term satisfaction? I know the answer; balance between extremes is always best, but constantly second guess myself. Especially when it's something so trivial as this. Usually, when it's very important, I'm a little more decisive. At least, I'd like to think so.

April 25, 2002 - We went to the Par Ecxellence graduation thing on tuesday. It was pretty good, but I think Sarah's trainee graduation was better. I kinda like going to those things 'cause I get to eat the falmbé that the trainees make! We had to pay for the ticket to go, but it all works out.

I was at HITS yesterday helping them with their sets. I love doing it, too. I got sawdust in my eye, though. I also busted my knee on one of the boerds while I was trying to drill something. I didn't actualy brake it - just a little bruise. It was cool, though cause it made me feel like I was working! I got to see Marci and Julie there and catch up with them(since they were the ones who're working on the sets). Sounds like everyone's doing pretty well. I'm probably gonna be called on again in the next few days to help with more stuff, so I better brace myself for it :).

April 22, 2002 - Man, it was HOT yesterday! Maybe having my AC broken made it just a little hotter. I hate sweating when I'm not doing anything. It's one thing to sweat while you're active, but I feel uncomfortable when I'm sitting on the couch and thin, sticky film of sweat begins to form on my face and around my shirt collar. Gross, huh? yeah, well, that's what summer's like so I guess I better suck it up and get ready for it.

Sara (no "h")'s birthday was this weekend, so Mikey invited us over. It was cool. I haven't hung out with both of my brothers in a long time (Mark was there, too).

Got to hang out with Lordy this weekend, too. Haven't seen him in a while either. He's always fun to hang out with. We got to eat sushi. Cafe Japon. I shoulda took pictures. It was goood. I never got the japon roll before. I liked it. I been going to this sushi buffet over there out fm1960. It's no comparission. I agree with Lordy when he says, "The words 'sushi' and 'buffet' should never be used in the same sentence." Then later, me and Sarah took him to Papadeux's to get crawfish. As you can tell, this wasn't a frugal weekend; but it sho was fun. I don't regret it. Then again, I guess I shoulda washed dishes sometime. oh well, just more to do tonight.

April 15, 2002 - This weekend was really nice and relaxing for me, but I feel guilty cuase Sarah had to work really hard.

See, we had cleaned our house on Friday so that we could have people over. It was still pretty clean, so I didn't do much housework. Instead I had realxing coffee in the morning while watching some cooking shows, ran a few errands, washed my car a little, bought some gesso; all kinds of relaxing/fun stuff. I even got to have Lunch with Mikey and Sara (no H, different person). Then we did his taxes. It was his first time and he did pretty well.

Meanwhile, Sarah's at work all weekend and we only get to see each other for a little while. she's all tired at the end of the weekend. At least she got to go out with the girls Saturday. It sounds like she had fun. Still tired, though. I Wish she wouldn't so that to herself, but she's so determined to get though school. You gotta admire that.

April 11, 2002 - Computer still out of comission, but it looks hopeful. Tonight's the show at the Miller Outdoor Theatre, so we're gonna go check it out. It sounds like it'll be fun. Simon woke me up by licking my head this morning. He does that to Sarah all the time, except sometimes he bites her hair and pulls it! I think he didn't do that to me cause my hair's too short ;). Julius likes to get on the window above our bed and when he jumps off he jumps onto our bed; sometimes landing on us. It really hurts when he lands on your belly. He's getting big. Those crazy cats!

April 8, 2002 - My computer went crazy on Saturday. It sucks. Luckily, I have a friend whose helping me out with trying to bring it back to life. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

April 5, 2002 - The weeks go by so fast nowadays. Maybe it means I'm getting older, or maybe it means I have a good job. Or maybe it means I'm not doing everything I want to do in a day. I dunno. Maybe it doesn't mean anything. Maybe I've just become acustomed to my life as it is right now and things are actually kind of good. Then, that would mean that the better things get, the more I measure my life by my misery and pain. That sucks. That means all I do is complain. I don't want to do that. I WON'T do that! But is that in my nature? Why do I have to consciuosly remember not to complain about things? Things really aren't bad at all, yet I immediately want to complain about any aspects of them. But I don't vocalize it because I try to hold myself back. It's because I hate it when other people complain about stupid shit, so I don't want other people to hate ME for doing the same thing. But that's not how I am all the time, either. I think I only want to complain about stuff that I do or don't do; not stuff that other people do. Does that make me selfish? Does that make me too critical of myself?

April 2, 2002 - Easter's one crazy day. At least it's April now, so Episode two is comming out next month. Oh man...!!!!