It's Brenda!!!!!!!

Brenda's (fake) Live
Journal Thingy

Since everybody seems to have one of those silly online journal thingys and i cant seem to get my hand on a password/invite for one, i just figured i'd do what i did a long time ago and just make my own site. only that its even better cuz i can put whatever the hell i want on here!!!!!!

Saturday, August 31st, 5:46pm- I LOVE BOSTON!!!!
today is my 6th day in boston, and i have to say, its the best. My roomate still isnt here yet, she gets here tomorow, so ive had the room to myself for the week. Im all settled in, except that i have to decorate my walls a bit more.
i went shopping with the girls today.....with kristen, doah, nicole, suzan, and laura. we had lotsa fun and time flew, we went to H&M, which is the best store ever. i bought a pair of gray cords, a tan cord skirt, an off white peasant top, a belt, and OF COURSE! some underwear. we ate lunch at quincy market, and on top of being such a great time, it got us out of warren when the ruch for move in was going on. Thank god i did fysop.
last night i went out and had some pizza with this guy jason and a bunch of girls who he knew. it was nice because one of the girls was puerto rican, so she was actually the first other puerto rican girl ive met here. anyway, im not feeling all that inspired to go on and on right now.....so maybe leater, at like 3am when im bored or something. hasta.

Monday, August 19th, 10:59pm- Well, its been quite a while since i last wrote, huh? i suppose i should say that ive been soooo busy or so much has happened since then, but, honestly, i havent. i guess ive just been being very lazy and not in the mood for writing or serious contemplation of the fact that im really leaving. the only really big thing thats happened since is that i finally got my tattoo. i love it i think that the guy did a really awesome job and i am so glad that i got it. it hurt like hell though, especially the parts where the rays are straight up and down my back, on my spine. on wednesday night i went out to dinner at chilis with everyone from school. i guess it was nice to see everyone, but kinda disaappointed that some people didnt really seem to want to come. i just dont get why i had to call some people more than 5 times just to invite them to join me and our friends for a final dinner, and why when we got there they dont say a single word to me. guess it takes two to tango though. so other than that it was a nice night. i missed seeing trina and doug, but everyone else showed. on another completly different note, i have been trying to figure out who knows my BU email address because ive gotten some of those "someone has a crush on you" emails at that one, and i didnt really think that anyone knew it. oh and my big clue as to who it is was that they are between the ages of 16-20. that leaves pretty much everyone i ever knew lol. oh well. not like it matters anyhow.
i got my hair trimmed today. i was reminded again of how much i love my curly hair.....my stylist loved it! and to think, someone once said curly hair is immature.
life with a credit card is turning out to be too much for me to handle, lol. im not allowed to spend any more money! at least i know i have everything i really need for school. speaking od, i finally got my room assignment and i spoke to my roomate. her name is tina, shes from virginia, and she seems really nice and into alot of the same things i am. hopefully ill be able to get the hang of this whole sharing a tiny room with another girl.
so oficially, im leaving in a week. this coming monday, i am so outta here. i cant wait to get to boston....even though no one is really nearby, i am really really excited. i get to do this whole community service thing the week before classes start, im gonna be helping out at the ymca, some boston area elementary schools. they have this whole big deal about how we cant wear 2 peice bathing suits. so i have my one piece, but i think im just gonna throw some board shorts over my bikini and call it a day, itll be way more comfy that way anyhow. lol isnt it funnyh ow i say im way more comfy in a little bikini?
SIGH......i have to start packing. i really dont wanna, and im avioding it like the plague, but i can tell, its coming. its funny though, theres really only a couple of things that i really care about bringing, and those are my cool morroco blanket, and my purple stuffed frog, it was a gift. yeah, im really a big baby at heart and i want those things with me for comfort.
so anyway, i was thinking, if we have christmas at my house again this year, will anyone come? i mean sure, there are a few who its just a given that they will be there, but some who i dont know if they ever care about speaking to me again. whatever, i will invite the people i wanna see there and if they dont come, they dont come.
after talking to tina today, i realized soemthing pretty funny: that at BU, ill be the underprivelidged one. all the other kids im going to be there with have taken AP classes, have parents who not only graduated high school but college, and have gone to school where having a 3.9 gpa means something. but, i know that if i actually try, i can do really well, and i know i am so lucky to have the opportunity to even be at BU. i guess overall im just kinda worried about being able to get the grades to keep my scholarships, cuz, well, if i dont, i will litterally have no chance of continuing in school.
too much for my *pretty little head* to worry about tonight.
sweet dreams everyone.

Friday, August 2nd, 1:54pm- Guess what? i can buy lotto tix now. lol. so my 18th birthday was fun. i definitly enjoyed myself. so we all went up to Mohegan park, and i didnt even get lost, thanks to my team of kids in the backseat giving me very mixed up directions. of course ramel tried to drown me, being such a wonderful friend and all. or you know, maybe it was cuz i repeatedly told him that he was to STAY under the water. anyway, he wouldnt have drowned, the fish would have saved him. melissa, jon, and ramel all got me really cool things for my dorm room....its gonna rock....not to mention im gonna have the greatest, comfiest bed ever, lol, and red lighting! well, i forgot to bring plates or napkins for the cake, so, we ate it with our hands, and i cut it using the knife i bgought for the watermelon. im sure i must have looked SOOOOO attractive with frosting all over my face thanks to jon and ryan, sitting there eating cake with my hands, oh and not to mention licking all the frosting off....my fingers! ;o)
when i got home, i got to have that whole, family time thing, so i had cake with angie and my mom and dad and my guela. my mom made me the greatest cake this year, it was an ice cream cake, and she put a sun wth the symbol for leo in it...my tattoo!!! well, it will be my tattoo when i go to get it. you know, the funniest thing is, when i go to get my tattoo, my mommys coming with me, and shes getting one too!
Its funny, ive started to realize that hey!, in three weeks im leaving. its kind of an odd realization to come to. i guess i really better start packing and finish up my shopping. and, hey speaking of.....i hafta call BU and ask about my housing, i still havent gotten my room assignment, and its close enough to moving time for me to start worrying, i guess......
anyway, im sure youve all got better things to do than to listen to my pointless prattle, so im off......
ITS THE WEEKEND!!!!

Wednesday, July 31st, 9:27pm- I went to the beach today! with angie and ivy, it was great. actually it was just like we were five years old. (fucking five years old?--michelle knows what im talking about). we got to the beach, got hot, decided to take a walk down to the end where the rocks are, walked on the rocks for a couple minutes, climbed down, then walked around that whole creekish part, and tried to teach ourselves to skip rocks (it didnt work). then we decided to be adventurous, and walk through it to get to the waterford beach side. however our adventurous streaks came to a halt as soon as we stepped foot in the partof the water where the sand was all squishy and just kinda absorbed your feet, in fact, we all grabbed onto each other hands and started screaming, it must have been hilarious to see. so then we got out the water, and stood at the edge, and found a few hermit crabs. (did i ever tell you guys, a couple years ago i brought a pet hermit crab back from VA beach, his name was floyd, he had a blue shell, he only had one eye, and i loved him very much until one day his legs started falling off and he evenually died :o(, i was very sad) then headed back to our blanket, and ate our lunch.
we figured out how it so much coller if you sit right by the water and let the waves crash on your legs and feet. we tried to make sandcastles, settled on snadsculptures. angie made a turtle, ivy made a fish, and i tried to make a mermaid, but it wasnt working so i just stepped on it. we sat there for a while longer, and then the two of them decided ot go look for the boys. as it turns out, they were gone for about 10 minutes when jose, ryan, and david all walked up to me at the blanket. jose made me go in th freezing ocean water, but i got used to it, and it was fun. finally angie and ivy made it back, and lance showed up. so the boys are there playing in the ocean, and when i got hot enough i went back in. but i was only gonna go up to my waste, cut the waster is FREEZING, but jose made me go up to my neck. lol.
all in all it was a fun day, despite a flat tire (just a side note: sams isnt the worst place to get a flat--the kids ate chicken and jojos, and i had my vanilla coke).and i get to do it all over tomorow at mohegan park!!!

Tuesday, July 30th, 9:41pm- Today was just boring. and now i have like, the hugest of all headaches. im not quite sure why i have headaches so frequently, but its very annoying. so anyways, tonight i was watching buffy, (big surprise), but it wasnt my tapes this time,it was normal tuesday night goodness. this was the ep where shes invisible (blinvisible, as xander would say) so im thinking, what would i do if I were invisible. i mean, buffy just kind of used it to screw with people heads, and well, literally, to screw spike. very interesting though. like jeremy says hed go rob a bank. i dont think id do that, i think the fun of it would be seeing people, how they really are, without anyone around, because, you know, everyone puts on a kind of mask when theyre around people, so ithink it would be fun just to see them. then of couse, theres always the thing with spike. lol, j/k im a good little girl, right?
but really....just think about it......no one to see you, but you can see everyone else, i think, for one thing, id def go swimming, sans any outer wear, cuz well, no nes gonna see me. not that theres anything wrong with skinnydipping, its actually quite fun, but broad daylight, and no need for clothes or anything, it would be awesome. anyway, i think ive managed to make my headache even worse in the course of all this incessant rambling. time for some definite overdose proportions of aleeve. lol
night everyone.

Sunday, July 28th, 6:15pm- Im not exactly sure where i wanna go with writing tonight. i dontthink i ever mentioned how nice it was to see that people really do care and wanna help when it really counts. the people where my guelo and guela work took up a collections and so far have given them more than $2000. its so nice to see things like that. kinda restores your faith in people as a whole. then you get those people like that woman last night who are just rude and stupid. lol. i got really mad at this woman at work last night cuz she was being a real witch if you know what i mean.
anyways......"the shows already started thats not the point" yet another random buffy quote that nobody gets but me. i was thinking earlier today, how i havent really hung out with anyone too much this summer. but i havent really felt bad about it. likei think i should, but i dont. i guess im kinda used to being on my own sorta. i mean sure i have always hung out with my friends and stuff, but there hasnt ever really been one person who i always am with. and i have lots of best friends, or had, but no matter who i was best friends with, thier best friend was someone who wasnt me. im not sure if that makes sense, but i dont feel like being all specific about it and stuff. so all i mean is that im not really dependent on anyone. BUT everyone is suppsed to hang out on thursday, at mohegan park. for some reason or other but the important thing is that everyone will get to hang out. i know, i make like no sense at all but its ok. im always spouting off some random nonsense anyhow.
im in quite a weird mood right now. kind of nostalgic but not really, because i really feel as though i dont care, at all. but then theres another part that just wants to see everyone of my friends and give them a big hug. but thats all. i dont know. i should shut up.
well....ouch.....my foot and leg are alseep and are all pins and needles now......wonderful.
i guess that ill get out of this mood eventually. im just kinda not sure why i am feeling this way in the first place. im happy to be getting out of new london, and even though i know im leaving a lot of great people behind, i know i will meet new ones and it is all ok by me. oh, WHATEVER, im not gonna worry about it anymore.

Thursday, July 25th, 9:44pm- Hi everyone! today michelle took my pictures. she needs to have certain pictures taken in order to i dunno, i guess be a "real" photographer at the picture people. shes a real photographer as i see it anyhow. but so she took pics of me. i was supposed to stand in the birthday box, but we ran out of time. oh well.
i went shopping AGAIN today, but this time for clothes. i got lotsa cool stuff, westfarms mall sucks, but we found these great stores in west hartford. or actually we didnt find them but melissa had been to them before. we got lost on the way home, lol, and angie was half an hour late for work. but it was ok, and hey, we bought stuff!
so im loving having my guela and guelo live with me. yesterday my guela cooked for us, angie was VERY happy about that. like, my mom cooks and stuff, but she doesnt usually cook spanish food, but my guela does all the time.
today i put the birds downstairs and fed and gave them water, i think they like me a little better now. but shes still not sitting on the eggs, theyre never gonna hatch!
I guess thats about it from now.
SHOPPING IS FUN!!!!!!!

Wednesday, July 24th, 8:48pm- "Fire bad, tree pretty", has never meant more to me than right now. its a buffy quote from when she was standing in front of her school as it burned to the ground. well i can kinda relate to that. yesterday, my guela and guelo's house caught fire. angie and i were out, and when we came home (around 2pm) our street was blocked off. so i parked around the corner and as i got closer, realized, horrified, that all the fire engines and police cars were there because my grandparents home was the one on fire. first thing, i saw my guelo, so i knew he was ok. i asked if everyone else was alright and he said yes. it turns out, my little cousin and guela were the only ones in the house besides him, and he had been taking a nap. well, its a pretty old house, as is ours (they were both built sometime around 1890) and the wiring is all pretty old. so and electrical fire started in the bathroom, and thank god that my guela noticed and woke my guelo up. she told my cousin angel to dial 911, so he dialed, and gave her the phone. so the fire trucks got there, and sometime after, so did angie and I. i was completely in shock, but once i realized that they were all ok, it was a bit better. long story short, my grandparents are staying with us now, good thing we have an extra room in the house, and were working with the insurance guys to fix the water and fire damage done to the upstairs bedrooms, bathroom, and roof (extensive damage according to the fire marshall). so yesterday was a very long day.
on another note, my guelo has these pet birds, so they are here now too. sometimes i see spike looking at them and hope he isnt wanting to like, eat them or something. these are some wierd birds though. one is really mean and doesnt like me very much. and they have eggs, bbut the mother bird doesnt care very much, so she doesnt sit on them so i dont think theyre gonn hatch. talk about bad parenting. oh well whatever. Night everyone.

Monday, July 22nd, 5:48pm- I went to BU last week. it was a fun experience. i didnt get lost on the subway, and i met a lot of cool people, and i picked out all my fall classes. There were a lot of kids there who seemed very waterford or east lyme ish, if you get what im trying to say. This one girl i met, Megan, she was from manhattan, and went to one of those posh NY private, all girls, catholic schools, and she went there with guilianis daughter, dan akroyds kids, and nikki hilton. im just like, yeah ok, i went to NLHS, lol. but she was a very nice girl and didnt seem at all stuck up or snobbish. i met one of the like 10 black kids there (blacks and hispanics actually ARE minorities here---not at all used to that), this guy jason, from DC. he was cool, i talked to him for a while, and it turns out that his top choices were both BU and NYU, but BU gave him lots more moolah. sounds familiar. oh and did i mention he was really cute, not that it matters, but just a noteworthy mention. :) also i met this guy ryan, from long island. i ended up talking to him pretty extensively on thursday night at the GSU open house. probably the complete opposite of me, comes from a small mostly white town (not one black kid attended his school), and where i was in yearbook, drama, the list goes on, he was in "mathletes" and the like. it was nice to really get to know at least one person, and to add to that, one person who will most likely be in the same dorm as me. hehe, im taking 1st semester spanish, because you know, i dont really know how to conjugate verbs very well....hola, gato, chancla, i can say, but if you ask me whats the correct form of jugar, 3rd person, present tense, im stumped. but i dont really mind, because itshould be a bit easier for me, and that definitly a good, because if i dont keep a 3.2 gpa my scholarships, all $26,000 of them from BU are history.
i went shopping (again!) yesterday, this time i came back with a "bed in a bag", a cool new cd player/alarm clock, a lamp, a gabage can, some towels, one of those foam egg crate matress pads, some pillows anda few other various items. im doing good with this dorm shopping thing. ive got all the basic stuff you need, and nowi just get to pick out cool accesory items! i guess thats about it for now, im kinda tired after work, and i think im gonna watch simpsons for a bit.....and then up to my room to continue t he endless task of getting rid of all the shit i dont need. au revoir!

Wednesday, July 16th, 6:36pm- Hey! im happy, im am outta this place in less that 12 hours. new london, while being fine for just being lazy and stuff, is not really the center of all things fun and exciting. angie braided my hair today....2 1/2 hours total, i know, thats absolutely ridiculous, and on top of how long it took, it hurt like a bitch for her to braid it. so anyhow........hmmmmm. not really much to write about. like i said, NL isnt really a happening place. so aside from packing and doing my laundry tonight, i dont really have a story to tell. however im sure that when i come back ill have lots to say and talk about....so....later!

Monday, July 14th, 7:20pm- Well! i went shopping today. i was supposed to work but rosa read the sched wrong and thought she was coming in, and since i worked friday, and yesterday, and tomorow, i said it was fine for her to work my shift. it was a nice break actually. so my mom, angie and i went up to lisbon (i know, lisbon? wtf is that? who the hell goes to lisbon) but any ways, we went up to some stores there, i got a new quilt, some "storage cubes", towels, a butterfly chair, matress pad, etc. all in all not a bad day. so im going up to boston on wed for orientation. im taking the train there and get this: i hafta leave here at 4:20 in the morning. talk about ungodly hours. so anyway, i get to boston at like 6:30 am, so im gonna have some time to kill before my 11:30 registration. five hours to be exact. i figure that once i navigate bostons lovely underground transportation system, otherwise known at the "T", ill just head the gsu, get some coffee, and chill for a while, till i head to the financial office to take care of some of the minutiae of getting free money (score!- i just got another scholarship, so no work study for this chica! maybe ill do some waitressing somewhere in the city). so now im wondering if maybe i should go get some kind of book to bring along with me....just in case i get bored on the ride up there....but im thinking, theyre gonna give me some kind of summer reading list, so maybe i should just calm down before im in over my head. i didnt have to go on wednesday, i could have gone for just thursday and friday, but i signed up for this whole "common ground" diversity workshop thing. i know i know, im from New london, not just puerto rican but also filipino, so why would i of all people, need to go to yet another diversity oriented thing. i figure, if nothing else, ill get to meet some of the other kids and know them a little better, and hey, and can always do my whole, arroz con gandules and pansit spiel. either way, im looking forward to meeting some new people, in a new, kick ass city. ok, moving on. i think i almost broke my toe the other day, because im a genuine klutz and stubbed my baby toe, very HARD on the vaccuum cleaner. it turned kind purple and swollen for a couple days, but its almost back to normal now and doesnt really hurt all that much. see, never a dull moment. so im sure im gonna just break everyones hearts by doing this, but i hafta go now.....hehe.....adios mis amigos!

Wednesday, July 10th, 10:12pm- ok i have stuff to write about today. mostly about friends. "friends" FRIENDS? anyway......so we hang out and drive around aimlessly......gets alittle old. or you know. i get pissed and tell him to bring me home.....then to not call me til tomorow. i really cannot wait to go to boston. i mean, i know that i love all you guys so much.....but its like...whats the point of lingering here all summer. ive already lost touch with some people....ones that i really care about.....and others......i dont know. just disreguard everything i just said. ive tried to go shopping for dorm stuff....but havent really found much yet, besides a few sets of sheets.SIGH. whatever.but yeah so back to my friends. i guess i was just really irritated today....it makes me glad to have a sister here who i can hang out with and stuff. moving on, i spent all day just kinda lying around my house enjoying time by myself....and was even gonna watch dawsons.....but wb was having movie night so i ended up on the phone instead. jon still trying to win his bet....hes not gonna, michelle will win first :)
yeah..blahblahblah. how am i at a loss for words? oh well. whatever. night everyone.

Wednesday, June 26th, 8:19 pm- ok so its been like a month since ive actually written anything in here. um. well we graduated, i was the class speaker and of course i think i did an inadequate job, but its ok cuz its over now and we have summer vacation! i wasnt really sad actually, until after we all went outside and i went hug melissa, who had been crying throughout the ceremony, and i really started when i saw michelle. after that we all went down to the cefeteria to sign in for the all night hthing, i saw doug, and his "we graduated" hug made me feel better. i was fine at the all night thing, the entire time actually, it was a llot of fun. lol, we gotkicked out the guys sauna, and i almost killed myself playing on the velcro wall. i went and watched the "psychic"for a bit, laughed at all the complete bullshit she was telling everyone, and eventually was juist bored by it. the hypnotist came, which was really funny, seeing everyone do such silly things. when we realized how completely upset doug was at it, well, that just made me upset, cuz doug has gotten to be one of my bestest friends, and the last thing i want is for any of my friends to be sad/mad/or any other bad emotions. and i know that because doug believes so strongly in all of his ideals (one of the qualities i respect most in him) that things like this will happen, but it hurts when you see a friend upset. so after that i really started realizing, wow, this is it, and there are alot of people here, who i care about so much, and that i would never be in school with them again. i wont see their faces everyday in the career center, in the auditorium, art room, where ever else, wont explore dark basements, go on overseas flights to italy or spain, or anything even remotely like that with them all. so basically i was just hit by that all at once, and it got me very sad. i cried on the bus ride home. but i know that the ones that really matter, and care, ill see them in the future, and well have lots more amazing times together....and the ones who dont really care....theyll just fade into memories.

Monday, May 27th, 12:59 pm- I got some of my pictures developed, finally. i put like 11 rolls in next day service even though im not gonna pick them up til like friday, cuz, well, im broke. as always. so these pictures are from the beach last thursday. the kids (ryan, randy lance,

david, and jose) all had to tear off their clothes and run in the water at the same time, lol. so i ran down to take pictures of them, and theyre like, why dont you go in the water? so i figured why the hell not, stripped down to my

bikini, and ran in. IT WAS FREEZING!!!!! anyway, i didnt really wanna put my head under the water, cuz my hair would get all salty and stuff, but the boys said i had to, and they all picked me up and just threw me in the water, lol. then they decided it would be funny to throw jeremy in in his clothes....you can see him behind jose in that picture.
So anyway. i have to work today.....boring. i think im gonna bring my alarm clock cd player so i can at least listen to some music instead of just having to sit there singing to myself. and also i need the money, so it isnt really all that bad. im not looking forward to school tomorow, but its only 9 days left which seems like a REALLY, REALLY short time. i went shopping yesterday! i bought this picture frame thingy that im gonna put a photo collage in, and i bought a string of red lights which i put up around my bed, lol. has anybody else read that thing on red lighting???? anyhow.....EVERONE HAVE A GOOD MONDAY OFF!!!!!!!! see you all in school tomorow. ;o)

Tuesday, May 21st, 8:55 pm- heres a picture of me and ramel at prom. I LOVE RAMEL!!!! he's like my stupidest (in a good way!) bestest friend. im probably the most comfortable around him, plus we have lots of silly memories, like the toilet incident, mitchell beach, and that time he thought it would be a great idea if we took a shower with each other...and greg! (dont worry we didnt!) hopefully we'll actually visit each other when we go to school. he'll be one of the closest people to me anyways, so we probably will.
anyway, tonight was the national honor society induction. it was silly, and i actually got home in time to see buffy (season finale night, yay!!!) unfortunatly, i decided i would watch my tape of it

after it finished so i could do some other stuff, but i set my vcr wrong!!!!!! i actually only didnt tape like 3 minutes of it, but still, its BUFFY i have to see everything or else i get very upset. i know, its sad, really. i have a problem and i need help.
tomorow is skip day, but i have an interview for a scholarship, which kinda makes me mad. but the fact that im gonna hafta miss the senior trip for ANOTHER interview makes me even more mad. GRRRRRRRRR. college should be free.
on thursday were having a beach party. did i mention jose is absolutely adorable?
ummmm yeah so anyhow ive decided that im just not going to school next year. im gonna end up with some weird dippy chic for a roomate, and i'll have to wear pajamas, its just not gonna be good. lol. well, here are some more pictures, just cuz i have nothing better to do:

Me and Mely Me and Angie

Monday, May 20th, 2002 8:44pm- Well.....Prom was last friday night. it was fun, i think. of course that doesnt stop everybody else from bitching about how much it "sucked". i went into it knowing that it wasnt gonna be some incredible magical evening, but looking forward to seeing all my friends dressed up for a change, and i wasnt dissappointed. i enjoyed myself and i think all the girls looked gorgeous and all the guys looked great in their tuxes. i was really happy with my dress, i thought it was cool that nobody else really had the same style as mine.....in particular i liked amandas and megans dresses, amandas was really cool stylish looking, and megans was kind of like the style i originally wanted, and it looked really good on her. so theres my fashion analyisis for prom. as though anybody cares. :o)
sigh.....its the end of the school year, i figured i would be loving this....but i can not wait for the year just to be over with, so i can just enjoy my free time.....and not have to hear people complaining about all the random completely superfluous shit that they seem to find SOOOOOO important and way more important than things like, oh, say, the people were going to be leaving in less than 3 months after being together for so many years out of our lives. it just kinda makes me mad that people, at our age, and supposed maturity level can act so completly self indulgent and not think for a minute about other people.
i personally have been enjoying my time recently, and i dont see why everyone else isnt doing the same, which is probably the only thing that has been bothering me at all lately.
um yeah so anyway im bored of typing so im gonna go.....and im gonna add some of the rpom pictures onto here, when i get the time. (and no that that does not mean never!!!!)

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