Teshi’s Thoughts

 

 

Today is a very sad day for us six turtles, for our sensei and father, has just passed on to the next life.  Leonardo and Venus are comforting Michaelangelo as well as each other, in their own silent, yet mysterious way in which we all hope to learn someday.  Donatello and I are trying our hardest to comfort Raphael, but he won’t cooperate properly. Poor Donni wants so much to connect with his brother, but Raph has closed himself off from everyone and everything. 

            “Just leave me ALONE!!” he screamed when the other three joined us. The next moment the slamming of the door, made us all jump.  Would he be back? Tears began to tease my eyes, but I wouldn’t allow them to fall, for I had to be strong for Donni, as well as the others. I heard Venus sniffle from beside me, and I went to embrace her.

            “Everything will be alright,” I said, as I patted her shell.  She looked me in the face and nodded, as her bottom lip trembled.  Tears shone bright in her dark green eyes, which hid so well behind her baby blue mask.  Once again, the tears in my own eyes threatened to spill down my cheeks, but I swallowed them down. This was going to be harder than I thought.  Venus ran her hand across her nose to wipe away the tears that succeeded to fall, I gave her another quick hug to reassure her, that things will be ok.  After we separated from our embrace a thick silence hung in the air, for none of us five wanted to think about what had to come next.  Splinter lay peacefully in his bed, but he couldn’t stay there forever, and we knew that we had to prepare a funeral for him.  I had to say something, break this awful silence of non-acceptance of what had occurred.

            “So, what are we going to do about a funeral?” Huh? That didn’t come from me.  I looked to my left to see Leo biting back his emotion.  The leader to the end.  Mikey began to cry again at the question. Now it was final. Splinter was dead, and he wasn’t coming back. Donnie placed a hand on Mike’s shoulder, waiting for someone else to answer Leo’s question other than himself.  Ok, I guess it’s my turn now. I take a deep breath,

            “Well, we all have accepted Christ into our life, so why not get April’s pastor to come out here, and lay Splinter to rest the proper way?” Leonardo looked down to the ground, and I notice a tear hit his foot.  This is so hard on him, and Raph isn’t making it any easier for him. Running off like that! He should be ashamed of himself.

            “Alright Teshi, you and Venus talk with April when she gets back.  Don, Mike and I will tend to Splinter.” That was that.  Goodness, April is going to be so upset when she returns.  It is my turn to sniffle as I nod to Leonardo.  Why had I volunteered to do this? Why must I always be the strong one? “Come on Don, Mike let’s go.”  I notice Mikey wipe away some more tears, then follow Don and Leo to Master Splinter’s room.  As I watch them go, I feel this tugging on my heart as well as my mind.  ‘Is Splinter’s death going to pull us together and make us stronger, or is it going to shatter us completely?’ I shudder, as Venus slips her hand into mine.  She may be older than me, but at this moment she has every right to be scared.  I am too.

 

            “Guys, I’m home!” April’s soft voice trails to where Venus and I are praying.  We both sigh in unison, and open our eyes. It was time to let her know what happened.  Getting up, we stretch out our cramped legs, and prepare ourselves the best we can to face her. Death was one of the enemies we ninjas hadn’t defeated yet.

 

            “WHAT?!!” April shrieked as her golden brown eyes crystallized with emotion.  I nodded my head slowly, and took her hands in my own.  Venus hugged her shoulders.  “I-I…….I,” she tried, “I-I knew he w-w-was getting old, but I…..I didn’t know he was th-that bad off.”

            “I know,” Venus said softly, “Neither did we.”  April drew in a long breath and let it out slowly, calming herself.  She broke her hands from mine and brushed away her tears.

            “Well, he’s in a better place now,” she said more to herself than to us.  I gave her a weak smile,

            “Yeah.”

            “Leo, Donnie, and Mike are tending to his body,” Venus informed our friend.

            “We just finished,” Donatello said coming from our master’s old room. He looked so exhausted, but I know he hasn’t cried yet, just like me. We both think we have to be the strength for everyone else, until they can handle the problem on their own.  I walk over to him, and give him a big hug.  He’s shaking badly, like a tender leaf on a tree in the middle of a raging storm.

            “Hey, it’s going to be just fine; you’ll see.”  He lets out a shuddering breath and looks down to me, with such pain filled eyes, I think I’m going to start crying.  Nodding slowly, he hugs me tighter and kisses the top of my head. 

            “Where’s Raphael?” Uh oh. The dreaded question.  Who will be the one to answer it?  Everyone looks to everyone else. Great, looks like I’m the one to supply the answer again,

            “He’s uh,” I pause to think of the right words to say, when his voice behind me, nearly makes me jump through the roof,

            “Right behind you.”  His voice was hoarse and cracked.  All I can do is stare blankly at him, as April goes to him.  I didn’t expect him to ever come back.  Leonardo looks to his returned brother, and narrows his eyes in anger.

            “Leo, don’t,” I hear Mikey say gently.  They are the first words I heard him speak since Splinter’s death. 

            “Yeah, I’m back!” Raph snarls to Leo.  “Sorry to spoil your party, but he was my father too you know!”  April places her hand on the red masked turtle’s chest, to keep him from advancing Leo.  I feel a shiver run up my spine.  This isn’t good.  Venus takes her mate’s hand, and leads him to their bedroom, all the while I can hear her whispering to him.  I can’t make out what she’s saying, but I know that it’s soothing words.  Raphael seems to have calmed a bit, and Donni has stopped shaking.  Ok, this is a bit better.  Don tugs my arm in the direction of our bedroom.  So, he needs to release his tears. That’s great, because so do I!

            “Um, April?  Would you excuse us, please?” I ask quietly.  She nods, as she leads Raph and Mikey to the couch.  “Thanks,” I say and Donni and I quickly head to our room.

 

            As soon as the door was closed, I let my tears cascade down my green cheeks.  They soak my light purple mask and sting my black eyes, but does it feel good to get them out.  Don silently heads to our bed.  Still holding it in, better go talk to him.  I push away from the door, on which I had been leaning, and walk slowly over to him.  He sits on the bed, staring out the window.  I sit down next to him, take his hand, and rest my chin on his shoulder.

            “You can let it out now.  It’s just us,” I coax, as I rub his fingers with my thumb.  He closes his eyes, as if to block out painful memories.

“WHY?!!!” he half yelled, half croaked.  His grip tightened on my hand, and I have to press my lips together to keep from crying out.  A choking sound escapes his throat, as he begins to weep like a child.  That’s right, just let it all out.  I pull him to me, and let him cry into my shoulder as I begin to cry harder myself.  This is going to be one sore spot in all our lives for a long time.

 

            Don and I stop sobbing after a while, and just let ourselves stay in the protection of our embraces.  His breath is hot on my neck, and somewhat caressing at the same time.  It lets me know, that I have someone here who will protect me from all harm, just like I am there to protect him.  I tilt my head back to look into his dark brown eyes.  They are still pain filled, but the old smile is back.  Ohh Donni, I love you so much!  As if he heard my thought, he cupped his hands around my face and gave me a light kiss. I let out a small sigh and place my head on his plastron.  He wraps his strong arms around me, and I can’t help but grin.  Everything will be fine now, won’t it?

 

            The next couple of days passed quickly, without a lot of words spoken.  Leo and Raph still weren’t speaking to each other, but it seemed Mikey was doing a lot better.  He actually tried to pull on of his pranks on Donni and I.  He failed though, but we all got a good laugh out of it.  It was now the day of the funeral.  It took Bro. Collins, April’s pastor, a few moments to get over the shock that we were 6 giant turtles, and that he would be laying a mutant rat to rest.  The sermon was beautiful, and a real tear jerker as we each got up to say something about our beloved sensei and father.  Even Casey, who had showed up, was crying.  I had never realized how close he actually was to Master Splinter.  After the closing prayer, Leo and Donni dug Splinter’s grave, and he was finally at rest. Goodbye daddy. 

 

            “You know what?! I have always hated you! With your smug and superior attitude! Like, ‘Look at me! I’m a big bad leader! I kiss Splinter’s feet, because I’m better than you!’ Well, let me tell you something Leonardo! You aren’t better than anyone! In fact, I am the one who should have been leader. Forgive me for saying this, but I don’t know what Splinter saw in you!”  Raphael and Leonardo were really going at it this time.  This is not good!  Don tried to break them up, but all he got was a slug in the jaw from Raph. As he hit the ground, Leo turned on Raph, and sent him sprawling. I ran to Don, as Mikey, Venus, April and Casey all rushed toward Leo and Raph. 

            “Man, get off me!” Raphael spat at Mikey, who had pulled him off of Leo. Mike let go of his hostile brother, and went to stand with Leo and the others.  I had pulled Donni up, and we all stared at the fiery turtle.  He tossed out a line of curses, to us, grabbed his things, and walked out of the door for the last time.  Leo growled a ‘Good riddance,’ and headed to the bathroom to get cleaned up.  I started shaking.  Raphael wasn’t coming back.  He and Leo had actually become rivals, enemies instead of brothers.  I shrugged off the thought that this was the end of the family as I knew it, and went to get Don an ice pack for his jaw. 

 

 

                                      The End

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The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are the intellectual property of Kevin Eastman, Peter Laird and Mirage Studios. Teshi is the intellectual property of Renee`. If you want to use Teshi for something, ask Renee`. Just so we're absolutely clear: I'm making no money off this. I have no money.  If I had money, I could probably afford a string of rare black pearls and a lawyer, who could tell me what kind of legalese to put in here. As it stands, I can only beg shamefully not to be sued.  Please don't sue me!!!!

 

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