~The Godly Homemaker: Qualities & Characteristics
These verses depict a woman of strong character, great wisdom, many skills and deep compassion. Read the list below which describe this noble woman. I've included definitions and commentary. How do you feel as you read this list of attributes? Which one is the most valuable quality? Which one is least important? How do they work together? What is the ratio of doing versus being?
Virtuous: honorable, high principled, noble, of good reputation This verse begins the section to remind us of the importance of developing an excellent character. It sets the foundation for the verses to follow. A ruby is a precious stone that derives its value from the depth of its color. We, as "rubies in the rough", are striving to develop spiritual depth and greatness of character. Each moment and event helps refine and shape us into the jewels Heavenly Father would have us become.
Trustworthy: to be sure, confident, reliable This refers to her husband's ability to trust her integrity. While men are the providers of the family, they trust their wives to manage the household (financially or otherwise). Do we spend prudently? Do we share responsibilities within the home? Also, do we maintain trust within the marital relationship? For example, do we maintain confidences? Are we emotionally supportive of our husbands? (Please note: men also have a responsibility to their wives but the subject of this devotional is about the FEMALE perspective.)
Friendly: affectionate, sociable, kind How do you treat your friends? Are we kind? Caring? What is a true friend like?
Willing: eager, with strong desire, enthusiastic As a homemaker, we have a choice. We decide whether or not to do any particular task (laundry, dishes, etc) and, subconsciously or not, we also choose our mood when we engage in that task. Often times, we refer to housework as our "chores" which implies drudgery. What if we looked at it from a different perspective? In the verse above, wool was a precious commodity and highly valued. It was a symbol of purity. Wool was worn only by the priests, so this woman chose fine materials that would be given to the priests for their use. Could this also be a reminder to us as wives to be willing to help our husbands serve in their callings? Perhaps it is also a reminder to us to give our best efforts as we serve in our own callings.
Educated Merchant ships often had to travel long distances to many unknown places to bring back precious finds. As they searched, they learned many things which helped them as they returned to those places. When we attend women's conferences or our monthly Enrichment meetings, we bring back knowledge and spiritual insights that can help us in our homes.
Responsible This woman wakes up at night, and is aware of her responsibility to others within the home. As wives and mothers, we know that often, we sacrifice our time and energy as we serve those within our sphere of influence.
Good Steward To consider means to value or recognize the worth of something. Look back on the previous five verses. This woman has to be an excellent manager of time, finances and resources. Consider the parable of the talents (Matthew 25:14-30). We need to learn to balance our priorities and to manage our time. What we sow, we will reap.
Capable: efficient, proficient "Girdeth" is a verb, meaning to prepare oneself for action. She is strong, which refers to both spiritual and physical strength. This verse also speaks to her willingness to do those things required of her.
Self Confident: Assured, secure This is a woman who knows the quality of her work and is confident (not smug!) that she has done a good job. We need to perform our tasks to the best of our abilities and work to improve any areas in which we are weak. We are doing more than housework - we are building a home.
Diligent: tireless, focused, persistent, whole hearted The distaff and spindle are part of the weaving process. The spindle holds the thread and the distaff winds the thread. The weaver uses raw materials and controls what will become the final product. Heavenly Father gives us raw materials (talents, gifts, ideas, etc) and asks us to use them to benefit His kingdom. As we work diligently to develop these skills, we are building up our homes and the people within their walls.
Compassionate: tender, kind, merciful, in the service of others She reaches out to others, not waiting to be asked. Notice that, with as busy as she is described as being, she actively involves herself in helping others. We bless others even as we are blessed in the process. Although our highest calling is as wife and mother, we recognize that we are part of the family of God and are asked to serve others. By doing so, we are serving Him.
Wise: intelligence + experience = wisdom Scarlet, like the rubies mention in verse 10, is a deep red color. Scarlet also refers to the royal cloth used as a symbol in the Old Testament. Rahab tied a scarlet cord in her window, so when the Israelites came against Jericho, she and her home would be protected. This woman is wise, and trusts in God. She does not fear, because she has faith in the Lord. If we read our Scriptures, pray, and live a life of faith, we develop greater trust in the Lord which, in turn, increases our wisdom and ability to have even deeper faith. How do you suppose this helps our role as a wife and mother?
Knows her Self Worth Purple is the color of royalty. As daughters of a royal Heavenly Father, we too need to be reminded of our noble heritage. How we approach life is often based on what we think of ourselves. There is a difference between self esteem (based on what we DO) and self worth (based on who we ARE). Do you know who you are? Do your children know who they are? How do you help them realize their nobility? How do you remind yourself of your own royal heritage?
Submissive (the GODLY perspective, not the wordly one) Both men and women must first be submitted to God's authority. Submission, from a Heavenly perspective, isn't the same as obedience. To obey is to carry out an order without question. Submission, on the other hand, is a CHOICE to defer to another person. The dictionary defines submission as "to give up in favor of another. The decision to relinquish control, to yield to the authority of another." Christ submitted himself to Heavenly Father. The husband is the head of the home, and is responsible to God for the way that he uses that position. The Scriptures teach that the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the Church. A man should love his wife and model himself after Christ. A woman should love her husband and submit to his RIGHTEOUS Priesthood authority. Abuse is never to be tolerated. There are volumes more which could be added to this subject. What would you include?
Industrious: hardworking She maintains a high standard...good quality and workmanship. Do you remember what the book of Genesis said when the Creation was complete? The Lord said it was good. He was proud of his work. We should also be pleased with our efforts and should strive to do the best we can.
Faithful This verse refers to moral integrity and uprightness. This woman is living a life of quiet dignity and moral courage. She has faith that the future holds good things for her and her family. She has faith in her God.
Kind What is the law of kindness? How do we speak about our husband and children publicly? How do we speak to them privately? It is more than the words we use; it is the tone in which we say it. Our body language can speak volumes. "Your actions speak so loudly I can't hear what you're saying." Ever heard that? What does it mean to you? The woman in this verse knows when to speak, when not to speak, and what to say.
Productive This woman might seem to be a workaholic! She is always looking after her household...never being lazy or sluggish. Does she ever take a break? I'm sure she does. But she also does purposeful activity. When you clean, do you have a clear attack plan or do you just "do whatever" until it all gets done? When you cook, are the meals already pre-planned or do you wait until dinnertime and poke around for "what looks good"? Does laundry get done when someone needs a shirt or pair of pants? Maintaining a household takes time and energy, but also requires good time management and planning.
Honorable "Arise up" in this verse refers to her children growing up. All women want their children to think favorably of them. This woman is beloved because she lives righteously, strives to be a blessing to her family and is esteemed for WHO she is and not merely for WHAT she does.
Reverent Lemuel's mother, the Queen, is reminding her son that the woman he should marry must live righteously, putting the Lord first. If we put the things of God first, everything else falls into place.
Inner Beauty A baby doesn't know whether his mother is beautiful or homely; it only knows how she makes him feel. Have you met people that seemed very good looking, but when you got to know them, there was a dullness there? Or the opposite effect: someone not very striking becomes very pleasing to the eye because they have an inner sparkle? Jesus himself was a plain man, not very handsome Did you notice that NOT ONE verse refers to her outward appearance? Inner beauty should be valued much more highly than physical beauty. Ask any model--outer beauty is fleeting.
Yielding the reward of a life well lived, verse 31 states, Give her the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
This site updated 17 NOVEMBER 2001
Verse 10: Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies?
Verse 11: The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her;so that he shall have no need of spoil.
Verse 12: She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
Verse 13: She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
Verse 14: She is like the merchant's ships; she bringeth her food from afar.
Verse 15: She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.
Verse 16: She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.
Verse 17: She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.
Verse 18: She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.
Verse 19: She layeth her hand to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.
Verse 20: She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hand to the needy.
Verse 21: She is not afraid of the snow for her household; for all her household are clothed with scarlet.
Verse 22: She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.
Verse 23: Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.
Verse 24: She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and deliverth girdles unto the merchant.
Verse 25: Strength and honor are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
Verse 26: She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
Verse 27: She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
Verse 28: Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
Verse 29: Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
Verse 30: Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.