From time to time I get letters from people learning more about the
band. Every letter is special and I do my best to answer them as quickly
as possible, but many folks ask similar questions. At any rate, I thought
that y'all would find these helpful. Names and addresses have been removed
to protect the innocent. If you drop
me a note and do NOT want it published here, just let me know, ok?
| Hi Layla,
I just wanted to thank you so much for your original & cleverly presented site! You offer so much extra stuff that I really needed to hear....details that are over & above the facts. What I mean is that you give alot of yourself & how the band has really effected you! For example, I am 3 weeks post band & I had researched alot prior
to my op. I also know that any weight lost in first 6 weeks is a bonus
blah blah......But, now that I am actually experiencing the band in real
life, I am upset that my progress seems stuck! You helped me alot by letting
me know what you could eat at all the stages.......now I dont feel as disappointed.
I am however looking forward to the first fill.
Anyway, you have done great...thankyou for sharing your many years of success & no doubt you will have many more to come. BTW I am 36, weigh 200 pounds & want to loose about70 pounds. I have 3 kids, 2 boys first & then a girl. Love & regards S (from Australia) |
"I also know that any
weight lost in first 6 weeks is a bonus blah blah......But, now that I
am actually experiencing the band in real life, I am upset that my progress
seems stuck! You helped me alot by letting me know what you could eat at
all the stages.......now I dont feel as disappointed.
Perhaps I told too many people. My problem is that when I try to explain the fill thing I know they think its another excuse by me. " |
| "When you have a chance,
write down a brief journal entry or take a picture or measurements with
a tape measure - I find these things really help me gain perspective on
how far I've come.
How can the alcoholic
moderate their drinking in that environment, with their physiological addiction
raging? It's similar with us. It's really hard because we can't go cold
turkey like a drinker.
Keep your chin up and
screw 'em if they don't get it. You're doing this for you, and so that
you can enjoy your life with your kids."
|
Hi S..
Thanks for the kind words. I try to give the details that I wanted when
I was starting out, and the details of daily life that matter the most
to me now. Hang in there with the long haul of losing. When you have a
chance, write down a brief journal entry or take a
Hang in there and don't let what other people think get too much in
the way. I know my father thought the band was a big cop out and that it
was an excuse. Somehow, if I put my mind to it, I could recover permanently
from my obesity. Well, 4 years later I can
I think most people who haven't been fat themselves just can't wrap their minds around what it's like for us. I try to explain it's like putting an alcoholic in a bar 24/7 and demanding that they only have 3 small drinks a day. How can the alcoholic moderate their drinking in that environment, with their physiological addiction raging? It's similar with us. It's really hard because we can't go cold turkey like a drinker. We have to eat, daily, for the rest of our lives. So, our solutions are necessarily much more complex. Keep your chin up and screw 'em if they don't get it. You're doing this for you, and so that you can enjoy your life with your kids. I'll tell you, I had a blast camping with my kids this summer, including 4 hour hikes. With 2 energetic little boys, I can't imagine what it'd be like if I was still 256 (or probably more) now. Cheers, Layla
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| Dear Layla,
I was banded on 10/13/03 at 222 pounds. It has been almost 8 weeks and I haven't lost much (maybe 8-10 pounds). I eat protein, vegetables. I exercise, I don't eat between meals and I am getting my water in. I don't eat breakfast but instead drink a protein drink because I can't seem to get anything down in the morning. So I only eat lunch and dinner. Sometimes I doubt I even have the band but know that I must because I eat only 1/4 of what I did pre-band. My first fill was on 11/24/03, my 35th birthday. I don't notice any
difference whatsoever. I am trying so hard to be positive but feel I am
failing. I am scared that I had this surgery and used money that my family
really didn't have to do so and now it won't work for me. Everyone else
I read about on the posts say how much they have lost even before their
first fill, why am I different? I was thinking all
|
"It has been almost 8
weeks and I haven't lost much (maybe 8-10 pounds)....
Sometimes I doubt I even have the band but know that I must because I eat only 1/4 of what I did pre-band. Everyone else I read about on the posts say how much they have lost even before their first fill, why am I different?" |
| "Please remember that
the averageAGBpatient loses 1-2 pounds a week.
...you're starting at a much lower weight than many AGB patients, and yes this can mean the weight loss is a bit slower. It's not necessarily fair, but there it is. ...many people need 2-4
fills before hitting that 'sweet spot' where they are not very hungry and
don't eat very much. I needed 3 for that first feeling of true relief from
hunger....It has to do with the size of the band in relation to the size
of your stomach and how much fat surrounds it. Every person's anatomy is
different
I lost 20 pounds my first
3 months before I got a fill (had to wait because of FDA trial protocol).
It was slow going, but after a year, I had lost 95 pounds..."
|
A....
I hope you are feeling more positive now than you were a few days ago. While life has been busy for me, I waited a bit in replying to see if time might help give you some perspective. Relax, we didn't gain the weight overnight and we can't lose it overnight either! *grin* Please remember that the average AGB patient loses 1-2 pounds a week. By my calculations, you should have lost 8-16 pounds, so you seem to be ahead of the curve. I know it seems like we should lose more after doing something as drastic as surgery. But in all reality, it's not terribly safe to more quickly than that on a regular basis. Also, you're starting at a much lower weight than many AGB patients, and yes this can mean the weight loss is a bit slower. It's not necessarily fair, but there it is. I was a relative lightweight at 256 pounds and a BMI of 37.5. I had friends who started at 350+ and dropped weight twice as I was. It was hard to watch, for sure. I'm not sure how much research you've done pre-op, many people need 2-4 fills before hitting that 'sweet spot' where they are not very hungry and don't eat very much. I needed 3 for that first feeling of true relief from hunger. One fill can do the trick for some people, but others it takes a few rounds. It has to do with the size of the band in relation to the size of your stomach and how much fat surrounds it. Every person's anatomy is different - the more fat around the stomach, the easier it is to feel restricted. This is also part of the reason why we need adjustments as we lose weight -- cinching the belt so to speak. You are doing the right things. Just keep on keepin' on. I lost 20 pounds my first 3 months before I got a fill (had to wait because of FDA trial protocol). It was slow going, but after a year, I had lost 95 pounds and was happy. It will pick up and drop off, like an ebb and flow of the tide. Just do the best you can each day, get another fill and try to release as much anxiety as possible. Let me know how you are doing in a few months, ok? Layla |
| Layla,
Thank you for your web site and personal views on your experience. I am thinking about having the surgery but am a little apprehensive about it. Elective surgery is an important decision to make, but, I can't kid myself into thinking that not doing something is an option. I have always had a weight problem, however, never to the morbidly obese state that I am at now. Never in my wildest thoughts did I ever see myself getting to this state. I am scared. I am disappointed in myself. I am a mad at myself. I didn't even know my weight until I accidentally saw it on my chart at the doctor's office last week. Who am I kidding? I have to do something. I remember always needing to be thinner. Being overweight has always been a factor in my life. I was thin at one time, but it didn't last long. I calculated my BMI (yesterday) to be 49. Whoa! I am scared. I don't want to be this person physically. Things are difficult for me and my husband and I are unable to conceive a baby. My insides are not healthy and my OB/GYN thinks I should go for the surgery. I am trying to educate myself on everything about it. Can you help me? I really want to hear from you. Thank you. -- MJ 5'4.5" 296 lbs BMI 49 10/10/2002 |
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Hi MJ..
You are on the right track and are clearly thinking alot about the choices you have to make. Keep doing research and keep talking to people who have had WLS. I can direct you to the Bandsters, where you can chat with and read stories of hundreds of people who have been banded.http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Bandsters/ I know that my periods became more regular once I started losing weight -- and that weight is related to PCOS which can be a fertility factor. I know several people who have had healthy babies after banding. Because it's adjustable, it can be a really good choice for those wanting to have babies -- they'd just open up the band to allow you to eat while pregnant. Cheers,
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| Hello Layla,
My mom recently had her first fill. Shortly after she repeatedly has
chest pains after eating. It started as a few times a day and now every
time she eats she has pain. She was admitted to the hospital last night
because she no longer could stand the pain. I am going to see her and the
doctor today. I read your entire website and found your information useful
and by the way you look great in your latest pictures. Is my mom's problem
a common thing or is there something wrong? Could her fill have been too
much? She does have a Hiatal Hernia.
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Hi --
What is she eating? How long is she chewing each bite? Is she vomitting
food? Can she keep down liquids? How much of a fill did she get? Did s/he
do it under xray? Some pain is normal in the learning process. That shouldn't
be a surprise -- if it is, she wasn't properly educated by her surgeon.
Cheers,
Layla |
| Hi Layla...
I had my banding surgery on October 1st.It has not been 2 weeks yet ,but I feel very discouraged cause I feel the urge to eat the same and when I do eat I feel like I could splurge.Of course I cannot without that vomitting feeling, but 2 hours later I am hungry again.I try to drink lots of water,but does not work.And I feel like I am eating too much before feeling full.Does that make sense?I was the 5th one that it has been performed on by the doctor.From my understanding he is the only one who does it in Tennessee.I had alot of pain in my left shoulder and neck afterwards, I guess I get discouraged cause I have had more problems than normal.Was yours easy?You don't have to respond but it is good to be able to talk to someone that has the samething as me.And by the way you look wonderful,I hope I have those kind of results!!!! |
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This is completely normal! You are not having more problems
than normal -- you're just learning how to eat again. The pain should pass
within the next few weeks, and you will feel more restricted with fills.
It does take some time to get used to that about-to-vomit feeling. It's
the band telling you to stop! It's OK if you are hungry 2 hours later --
just eat a small snack. The hungry feels don't usually go away for a few
months -- until you've had a few decent fills and your body and mind are
used to you eating less. You're only 2 weeks out. You didn't get fat in
one day, and you won't learn how to eat differently overnight either. Just
stick to the basics -- have 1 liter of water 40 minutes before your meal.
Stick to healthy solid foods -- fresh veggies and chicken/fish are a good
place to start. Walk 20 minutes a day. Don't expect more than 1-2 pounds
off a week. Hang in there and consider joining an online support group
so you can talk with others going through the same process.
Cheers, Layla |
| <<Dear Layla:
First, thank you for your website and especially the pictures. I'm thinking of having the surgery at the beginning of the year when I'll have enough paid leave accrued. >> Thanks! I would start investigating
surgeons and whatnot now. It can take some practices up to 6 months to
schedule people, particularly if there are insurance issues. They can always
set your surgery date in advance. Have
<< My questions are:
1. Do you think a week off work is enough time to plan on being out?>>
Plenty. I had surgery on Wednesday, released on Friday and back to light duty on Monday. I assume you are an office worker, yes? Lifting is not good, or standing for a long period of time, but otherwise you should be fine. I have a low pain tolerance, so it's not like I'm unusual. :-) |
<< 2. My major concern is self-control. My fear is
that if I don't have enough self-control now to eat right, then I might
not be a good candidate for the surgery. My weakness is sweets. And, I'm
diabetic no less!>>
*lol* There are two reasons we lack control. One is mental -- and I do suggest that you start ADDING behaviors that give you more control now. It's not about deprivation, but perhaps getting a pedometer and increasing how much you walk per day. Or getting you 5 fruit/veg in a day, or taking a yoga class. Start getting active and *do* things to give you confidence and health. The worst part about dieting is deprivation. We're set up to fail if we *can't* have something. Think instead about *adding* good behaviors --with time you will feel more confident and in control. The second part is physiological. Don't underestimate how much of our obesity is related to signals that encourage us to eat. We are programmed to eat alot and often. This (along with deprivation) is why dieting doesn't work. The band helps this by resting on your vagus nerve which sends fullness signals to your brain. When properly adjusted it constantly send low-grade "I'm full" signals to the brain, making it easier to control hunger. |
<<3. I drink a lot of water throughout the day. Are
there any consequences to drinking to maintain that or do you think I'll
just naturally drink less because I'm full?>>
You are encouraged to drink 1-2L (or quarts) of water day. Before you are properly adjusted, drinking *during* meals will wash food through your pouch, allowing you to eat more. Once you are fairly tight, water will clog your stoma, like a hairball in a sink, and cause you to bring back the food (like a hairball!). Drinking water will HELP you
lose weight, so this is good.
Cheers,
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