| Physician, Heal Thyself |
| Jim really hadn't been expecting to hear from Skoda again. He'd really enjoyed the sex Monday night, and, surprisingly, the short conversation afterwards. It wasn't like him to talk much about himself, especially to the near-strangers he usually had sex with, then never saw again. Something had been different this time. Maybe the Doc was just one of those people who were easy to talk to?
So when Skoda had called again, confirming that Jack was interested in a threesome, he'd found that for once he really did want to see the man again. They'd made plans for Thursday night, the last night of the city boys' vacation. And now here he was, driving his pickup truck through the campground, finally spotting the small cabin with two motorcycles parked out front. He was kind of nervous as he approached the door; he'd never actually done anything like this before. But then, he seemed to be having a phase of doing new things lately. Like figuring out that his college-educated brother and sister-in-law might be a bit more accepting of his lifestyle than the guys around here. That had certainly turned out well. He really wondered now why it had taken him so long to figure that out. He pushed those thoughts aside as he knocked on the door. It opened, revealing a smiling Emil Skoda. "Jim, come on in." As he passed through the doorway, Jim could see Jack standing in the background, pouring a drink. Last time, all his attention had been on Skoda; now Jim looked at Jack with a different perspective. Tall, slender, striking iron-grey hair, dark eyes which met his and held. "Drink?" Jack offered. Jim glanced down at the bottle; scotch whiskey, a lot harder than the beer he usually drank. A lot more expensive. "Sure." Jim accepted the glass, letting his fingers overlap Jack's for a moment. He sipped the amber liquid, not sure what to expect. As he expected, it was strong, burning as it went down his throat. He liked it. "Not bad," he commented, smiling, his eyes hinting he was referring to more than just the whiskey. Jack raised his own glass in acknowledgement of the compliment. While Jim and Jack took their measure of each other, Skoda watched with a grin. Watching them react to each other was a real turn-on. He decided to just sit back for the moment and see what happened. Jack was standing just inches away from Jim. They both knew what they were there for; the sexual tension crackled between them. Jack felt himself getting hard. He'd never felt anything like this before. With a woman, you had to wine and dine her, work on a 'relationship' before there was even a chance of sex. This was so different, so direct, so immediate. He wasn't sure what to say, what to do. Almost desperate for contact, he reached out his hand, his fingertips brushing lightly over Jim's cheek, feeling the strangeness of the closely cropped beard. "Jim, I �" The blond man shook his head, cutting off whatever Jack was going to say. He closed the small space between them, silencing Jack with his own lips. Jack's heart skipped a beat as Jim kissed him. It was hard, strong, demanding. The mechanic's strong arms wrapped around him, pulling him close. He could feel Jim's desire pressing against him, could smell the mixture of shampoo and cologne and the underlying something that was purely masculine. He found himself pushing back, opening his mouth hungrily, demanding as well as giving. Skoda watched them with a satisfied smile, one hand almost absently stroking his erection. Time to join in. He quietly crept up behind Jim, placing his hands on the broad shoulders as his lips latched onto Jim's neck. Jim gasped at the unexpected touch; he'd almost forgotten the Doc was there. Not any longer, though. Skoda's body pressed tight against his back as his arms worked their way between the other two men. Jim realized he was the middle of this sandwich, and he was liking it a lot. As if with one mind, two sets of hands began to undress him, tugging at his shirt, pulling at his belt. Realizing that Emil had joined the action gave Jack a surprising thrill. As Skoda's hands tugged open Jim's belt, he started on Jim's shirt. In a matter of minutes, their guest was stripped naked. Jack knelt before him, having just pulled his pants down, and found himself eye to eye as it were with the biggest dick he'd ever seen. Not that he'd seen that many, at least in this state of arousal. But still � he reached out and pulled it into his mouth, glad that they had decided that condoms weren't necessary. Jim was glad the Doc was standing behind him, holding him up as Jack swallowed him. Skoda's hands teased mercilessly at Jim's nipples, as Jack's mouth played with his cock. "Aw, shit!" he cried out, overwhelmed by the sensations. Skoda's deep bass chuckle surrounded them. "You like that, huh?" His fingers gave those tight nipples a good hard tug. Jim grunted his agreement. "God, yes!" he finally managed to gasp out. Skoda ground his crotch against Jim's naked ass. "You want some of that, too, Jim?" The idea of being fucked and sucked at the same time was almost too much. All he could do was nod. Skoda's hands left his chest as the doctor quickly discarded his clothing. He disappeared for a moment, Jim presumed to retrieve the lube. He concentrated on enjoying the blowjob Jack was giving him, and didn't hear Skoda's return. The next thing he knew, Skoda's hands parted his ass cheeks and one finger began probing his entrance. Being pleasured both front and back at the same time was exhilarating. He knew he wasn't going to last much longer. As the finger withdrew and he felt the Doc moving in to position behind him, he realized he was going to need some support. Leaning over Jack, he balanced against the small end table, spreading his legs to give the Doc better access. A moment later, Skoda was inside him, filling him up, while Jack resumed sucking his cock. It was unbelievable. He held back as long as he could, but it was just too much. "Coming!" he cried out just seconds before he did. Jack gasped as he tried to swallow the torrent of Jim's cum. Finally, he felt the big man slump over him, his passion spent. Shakily, Jack got to his feet, crawling out from underneath Jim. Skoda had pulled out and was watching them with a satisfied smile on his face. He nodded toward Jim. Jack took the hint and joined him, helping the wiped out mechanic to stand upright, leading him over to the couch. They sat down on either side of him, still basically holding him up. All three of them were more than a little breathless, so they just sat there for a while, leaning against each other. After a while, Jim realized that Jack was still dressed. Something seemed wrong about that. Oh, yeah. It was weird; he hadn't even finished his drink, but he felt almost drunk. Drunk on a sexual high? Why the hell not? He turned toward Jack, one hand reaching for the buttons of his shirt. "So, you planning on getting undressed?" he asked, almost giggling. Jack grinned. "Eventually." Jim's hand slid down his chest into his lap, checking out the lay of the land. Not surprisingly, he found Jack hard and ready. He tugged at Jack's belt. "OK, now, if you insist." Jack finished unbuttoning his shirt while Jim worked at opening his fly. He stood up and threw his clothes off, but before he could sit back down, Emil was standing beside him. "Come on; let's get more comfortable." He reached down, offering Jim a hand up from the couch. Jack mirrored the gesture, and Jim grabbed their hands, letting them pull him up off the couch. They led him back to the bedroom, where earlier they had pushed the two double beds together to make one big playground. Skoda dove onto the far side, stretching out on his side, propped up on one elbow. Jim paused to set his glasses on the bedside table, which gave Jack time to jump into the middle. Jim squinted down at them, watching as Emil's hand wrapped around Jack's dick. Jack's eyes squeezed shut as the pleasure washed over him. Jim hesitated; the Doc had said Jack was new to the game. He wasn't sure how far he'd gone, what sort of play he'd accept. He remembered his own first, frightened ventures. But then, he hadn't had an experienced friend to guide him. Hell, he hadn't even had a friend he could talk to about the feelings that were driving him off the beaten path. He felt envious of Jack, but it was more of a wistful sadness than the green-eyed monster. Skoda looked up at Jim when he realized the mechanic hadn't yet joined them. "Come on, Jim. Don't be shy!" That triggered a rush of heat up Jim's neck. His sister-in-law had confided in him that they had often wondered if Jim was gay, or if he was just painfully shy around women. In fact, both were true. His brother's wife was the first woman who had ever cracked the wall he'd built up around himself, and that only after their mother had died last year. For the first time in his life, he'd truly needed somebody to lean on, and she'd been there. She'd been the one to pry the secret out of him. And the first to ever completely accept him and love him even knowing he was gay. He could almost hear her voice urging him on. Shaking himself out of his thoughts, he sank down onto the bed beside Jack, who was lying on his back while the Doc jerked him off. Jim reached out and ran his hand over Jack's chest, letting his fingers brush over the nipples. Jack's hand came up to gently cup Jim's cheek. He seemed almost entranced by the feel of Jim's beard. Jim smiled and let his hand slide lower, over Jack's stomach, toward his cock. As it approached, Skoda moved lower, now playing with Jack's balls, letting Jim take over above. Jack gave an appreciative groan as two hands stroked him. Turning his head just a bit, Jim captured one of Jack's fingers, sucking it into his mouth suggestively while his hand worked Jack's cock. Jack was surprised by how turned on that little trick got him. It seemed strangely kinky, he didn't quite know why, but it seemed to fit right in. As if having two men playing with his cock and balls wasn't kinky enough. And then Emil's finger started teasing behind his balls, edging toward his ass. He wondered if it would happen today, or not? At the moment he really didn't care, as long as he felt this good. Jim let go of Jack's finger and bent down to suck on a nipple briefly before moving on to his cock. Jack had propped his legs up, spreading them, letting Skoda get to his back door. Jim shifted around to get a better angle, slowly swallowing Jack's cock. Emil got up to retrieve the bottle of lube. Greasing up two fingers, he cautiously slipped first one, then the other, inside Jack. "Unhhh �," Jack groaned at the second intrusion. By now, he was breathing quite heavily as Jim sucked him and Emil finger-fucked him. He couldn't stay still, alternately thrusting into Jim's mouth, and pushing back against Emil's hand. Grunting and groaning, his pleasure grew until he couldn't contain it any more and his cum exploded into Jim's hungry mouth. Once again, Emil crawled out of the bed, ducking into the bathroom to wash off his hand. When he returned, Jim had turned around and was trying to get up, but Jack had other ideas. "You don't have to go rushing off, you know," Jack commented as he pulled gently at Jim's arm. Jim looked down at him, kind of surprised. He wasn't used to sticking around, but as Jack's hand gently rubbed over his arm a small smile quirked the corner of his mouth. // Why not? // he asked himself, and when he couldn't come up with an answer, he gave in, laying back down beside Jack, not quite sure what to expect. Jack smiled as Jim rolled onto his side, facing Jack, hesitating before accepting the obvious offer to pillow his head on Jack's shoulder. He seemed entirely unfamiliar with the idea of cuddling, enjoying the afterglow. "Can I ask you something, Jim?" he asked as his hand gently caressed the darkly-tanned forearm which rested almost nervously on his chest. "Yeah, I guess," came the hesitant reply. "You've never been with a woman, have you?" While his forearms were tanned almost Hispanic-dark, the rest of Jim's body was about as pale as you could get, which showed his embarrassment quite vividly. "No �" Jack realized that for some reason this bothered Jim. "Hey, it's ok. I'm not saying you should. It's just � the way you were rushing off there. I noticed how early Emil came back on Monday, too. It seems to me that maybe one of the things about the gay scene that I don't like is this 'wham, bam, thanks, man' attitude. I suppose there's a time and a place for anonymous sex, but I didn't think it always had to be that way �" "It doesn't." Skoda's deep bass voice joined the conversation as he climbed back onto the bed, spooning in behind Jim. "But I get the feeling that's all Jim has ever known." The Doc's arm wrapped around him from behind, his hand gently stroking Jim's chest and stomach. It wasn't overtly sexual, but it felt nice. He felt himself relaxing under their touches. His own hand began tracing random patterns on Jack's chest. They were right; this was so different from anything he'd ever known. It was kind of like the warm, fuzzy feeling he got when his sister-in-law hugged him, but with just a hint of a sexual undertone. He felt safe here, surrounded by these two. Both of them just held him, gently stroking his skin, letting him think. Finally he answered. "You're right, Doc. I � I've never been one to open up real easy, you know? I guess I prefer to keep people at a distance. I know there's guys who find somebody special, almost like a normal couple, but that's not something I can have, not here. So I guess I just keep my distance so I don't want what I can't have. I mean, hell, this is the first time I've ever been with somebody twice �" He sounded so utterly convinced that any sort of real relationship was beyond him that it got to both of them. Skoda ran his fingers through the baby-fine blond hair. It was even softer than it looked. "You so sure of that, Jim?" Jim pulled away from Jack just enough to be able to roll over onto his back so that he could look up into Skoda's eyes. "Believe me, Doc. It ain't gonna happen here. Besides, I'm not sure that I even could � I've been a loner for so long now �" // So have I, // Skoda thought. And there lies the rub. Jack watched them, not saying anything. Rolling onto his side, he could see the wheels turning in Emil's brain, connections being made. Sometimes the hardest thing about ending a relationship was admitting how long it had really been dead. And how much you needed that human contact you hadn't even realized you'd been missing. Memories of Claire suddenly washed over him, and he realized he'd been doing the same thing. Keeping people at a distance to avoid the possibility of hurting that badly again. Before he knew it, he was talking. "I did the same thing, Jim. The woman I loved was killed by a drunk driver a couple of years ago. I didn't ever want to hurt that bad again, so I kept everybody away and crawled into a bottle of scotch. I don't think I realized until this week how lonely I'd been. You can live your life afraid of love, and live alone. Or you can risk getting hurt, and maybe find something special in the process. I've tried it both ways, and there's no comparison. It's worth the risk �" Even though he was speaking to Jim, his eyes had locked with Emil's. All week they'd been dancing around the issue. Was this just a vacation fling, or was it something real? Simple experimentation, exploring the distaff side of his sexuality, or making a real connection with another human being? Emil gazed back into Jack's dark eyes, realizing what his friend was saying. He knew he was still grieving for the end of his marriage. Most times he counseled people in this situation to avoid entering into a new relationship while they were confused. But he began to understand why they so often ignored his advice. The relationship he was grieving for had really ended quite a few years ago. It had just taken them this long to notice. What had pushed him into ending it was the realization that he WAS ready to move on. When his patient had propositioned him, he had thought he just wanted sex. But he knew now it was more than that. He wanted this connection, the feeling of being valued by another human being. He certainly wasn't ready for another 'till death do us part' sort of commitment, but then neither was Jack. But something in between, something friendly and comfortable, and yet still allowing them to live their own lives, that sounded pretty good. Suddenly he realized there was another person present. Somebody who needed his help, who could use a good example. He looked down at Jim. "He's right, Jim. If you can't have the kind of relationship you need here, why stick around? There's a big wide world out there. New York is just a couple of hours away; you'd still be close to your father �" Jim realized that something had passed between them. He couldn't quite understand it, but he had a feeling it was that something special he'd been avoiding all his life. Suddenly he was reminded of the way his brother and sister-in-law looked at each other. Like the world was somehow complete just because the other person was there beside you. His parents had had it too, although in a quieter sort of way than his brother. He realized that in some corner of his mind, he hadn't really believed that two men could share that same kind of connection. But seeing Jack and the Doc look at each other like that, he began to change his mind. "Doc, I'm just a country boy mechanic; I'd be lost in the big city. But � ever since Mom died, my brother has been after our dad to sell the garage and retire. Move down there with them. Lori keeps saying she has a gay friend she wants to fix me up with �" Skoda could see the wheels turning in the young man's mind. He smiled. "Sounds like they've got it all figured out." Jim laughed. "Yeah, well, Bobby always was the smart brother. We've just got to talk Dad into it. And now that I'm on their side, he hasn't got a chance!" Jack grinned, realizing they had gotten through to this lonely young man. He began to see the rewards of Emil's profession. It was very satisfying to know it had helped. He looked into Emil's eyes and saw a similar satisfaction. Jim watched them looking at each other and realized he had become something of a third wheel. Part of him felt bad; left out, discarded. The Doc was the first person outside his family who he'd opened up to like this, and it hadn't worked. But he realized that if he hadn't seen the way they looked at each other, he never would have truly believed it could happen. They had given him a gift, the gift of hope. The least he could do was to make his exit gracefully, leaving them alone to plan their future together. With a sigh, he reached out and gently touched both of them. "Listen, guys � I think it's time I headed home." His eyes locked for a moment with Skoda's, speaking silent words of thanks. Skoda nodded and sat up, making room for Jim to get out from between them. He looked at Jack, and they followed the young man out to the living area where his clothes had been abandoned, watching appreciatively as he got dressed. Jack's arm slipped around Emil's back as if it belonged there. After perching on the couch to step back into his western-style boots, Jim stood up and smiled as he realized they had been watching him. It WAS nice to be appreciated. Hesitating now, he wasn't quite sure what to do. Normally he'd just leave. But this time that didn't feel right. Emil realized his quandary, and stepped away from Jack for a moment to take Jim into his arms. "You take care of yourself, ok?" he whispered, his voice a bit rough with emotion. He was surprised by how much he'd come to care for this young man. Jim returned the hug, nearly overwhelmed by his emotions. Even though it wasn't the kind of love he'd hoped to find, he realized he'd found something special after all. // It IS worth it � // Neither of them noticed when Jack disappeared for a moment. He came back just as they reluctantly pulled apart. "Jim, if you ever get to New York, look us up, ok? We'd love to hear how it all turns out." He handed Jim a business card. Jim's eyes widened as he read the card: Executive Assistant District Attorney for Manhattan. Sounded important. He looked up at Jack. Fancy title or not, he realized it didn't matter. Jack was a good man, someone he was glad to be able to call a friend. He smiled. "I will, Jack. And � thanks." Jack nodded, then surprised Jim by pulling him into a quick hug. Blushing furiously, again nearly overwhelmed by his emotions, Jim gave them one last nod before ducking out the door. Emil sighed as he felt Jack once again wrap an arm around him. "I think we did something very good here tonight, Emil." Skoda smiled. "I know we did, Jack." He turned toward his companion, moving close, his eyes searching. Jack nodded, accepting the closeness, knowing that more than one special thing had happened here tonight. Almost as one, they leaned into the kiss. This time it wasn't about passion, or power. It was about surrender, and tenderness. Need, and want, not of sexuality, but of affection, closeness of the heart as much as of the body. Emil led Jack back to the bedroom, pulling him down onto the oversized bed. They lay there, kissing, touching gently, happy to be together, to have someone to hold on to. As their kisses lingered, their bodies began responding after all. As their arousal grew, Jack turned to his partner. "Emil? Will you � will you make love to me tonight? No games, just us." Pale eyes looked into dark ones. He realized Jack was right. There would be other times for games, but here, now, wasn't it. A soft smile on his lips, he nodded. Another kiss, then his lips began trailing a tender path down the length of Jack's body. Jack sighed with pleasure as Emil's hands and mouth caressed his skin. It was somehow more intimate, more personal now. He let his hands caress Emil's head, the smooth skin, the short prickly hairs surrounding it. It seemed a most intimate sort of touch. Then Emil pulled away, moving further down, beyond the reach of his arms. Spreading Jack's legs, he kissed and licked at the tender skin at the point where leg joins body. His fingers rubbed the perineum before gently cradling the heavy ball sac. Knowing that because Jack had already come once tonight, he'd last longer this time, Emil moved up just a bit to suck Jack's dick. Jack's entrance was still fairly well lubed from last time, so he was easily able to slip in a finger. Jack moaned with pleasure as Emil probed for his prostate, still sucking gently. He took his time opening Jack up, wanting very much to minimize the discomfort of this first time. Finally satisfied, he let go and sat up, reaching again for the lube. When Jack moved to roll over, he gently stilled his friend. "No, Jack. Stay there." Moving into position between Jack's legs, he lifted one long leg up to his shoulder. He positioned his cock, then looked up into Jack's eyes. "You ready?" They hung there in the moment, seemingly frozen in time. Jack felt nervous, and excited, but most of all he felt safe. He trusted Emil completely. With a soft smile, he nodded. Nodding back, Emil pressed in. Jack gasped; Emil's cockhead was a lot bigger than the toy he'd used the other day. It stung but just for a little while. As if to counteract the pain, Emil's hand gently stroked his cock. After a bit, his breathing calmed and once again he met Emil's pale blue eyes. "OK," he gasped, not quite sure if he believed it himself. Emil continued stroking him as he slowly worked his way inside. Jack closed his eyes and focused on the strange sensation. Pleasure and pain mingled, but pleasure was definitely winning out. When Emil's cock nudged his prostate, it was like a spark of electricity flowed through his body. Emil loved how Jack's body gripped him, but even more, he loved the expression on Jack's face. It was an inspiration; a look of total abandonment. Unable to restrain himself, he leaned over Jack, risking losing their connection, to claim those sensual lips. This kiss was unrestrained passion, but it was also something more. It held a promise, a hope for the future. Jack's arms came up, holding him in place as his hips began thrusting. Jack pushed back against him, his cock trapped between their tightly pressed bodies. They kissed again as they found each other's rhythms, clinging to each other, wanting this closeness. When the explosion came, Jack couldn't figure out who had come first; it had seemed simultaneous. All he knew afterwards was the comfortable weight of Emil's body lying over his. Somehow they disentangled, and Jack found himself with his head pillowed on Emil's shoulder. The doctor's hands gently caressed his skin as he watched Jack come back to reality. "You ok?" he asked, solicitously. Jack smiled up at him. "Yeah. Better than good. Great, at least. Maybe even marvelous." Skoda laughed at the way he was rambling on. "Glad to hear it." They lay together, enjoying the afterglow. Emil's hand wound into Jack's hair. Finally, he sighed. "Guess that's the end of our vacation. Back to the real world tomorrow �" Jack hugged him. "You ready to face it?" Emil shrugged. "I think I've got a better handle on it now than I did a week ago �" "So what are you going to do?" "Well, first thing on my list is finding an apartment. That hotel is bleeding me dry." Jack chuckled, but then got suddenly quiet. "I've got a guest room, Emil. You're welcome to it while you look ..." Skoda thought about it. It would save him a boatload of money. But ... "I appreciate it, Jack, but I don't think so. It would be too easy to slip into something beyond that, something I'm not ready for yet. I need some time to remember what it is to be ME." Jack nodded, more than a little relieved. He'd felt he had to make the offer, but he knew he wasn't ready for that yet either. But this way left the question still open � "Emil? Does that mean �? Skoda hugged him. "It just means I want my own place, Jack. Nothing more. I still want to see you. After being alone for so long, it's good to have somebody to hold on to." Jack smiled and hugged back. "I know what you mean. I don't think I'm ready for more just yet either. But this is nice, just having someone." "Exactly." They lay there quietly, each lost in his own thoughts, unsure of what the future would bring, but ready to embrace it, whatever it was. Back to the Story Index Send me some feedback Disclaimer: These characters belong to Dick Wolf and NBC. I'm just borrowing them for fun, not profit. |
| Chapter 9 |