physician1

Physician, Heal Thyself

Dr. Emil Skoda woke up and glanced at the alarm clock. 9AM? What the hell? Hadn't he set the alarm for 8? Shit, he was late for an appointment with Jack McCoy.

Groaning, he rolled out of bed and fumbled to find his cell phone.

"Jack? It's Emil."

"There you are! Got hung up?"

"Um, you could say that. I'm running a bit late today � could we reschedule?"

"Yeah, sure. How about lunch?"

"Great. Dmitri's?"

"Sounds good. See you there at noon."

He snapped the phone shut, then turned to look at the alarm clock. It was a typical hotel room clock radio. He grabbed his wristwatch and checked; the time was correct. So why hadn't the damned alarm gone off?

There. That little light in the lower left corner. It thought it was 9:07 PM, not AM. The clock was set 12 hours off. // For $200 a night, you'd think they could get the clocks set correctly! // he thought sourly. Sighing heavily, he reset the damned thing, then headed into the bathroom for a shower.

Half an hour later, he emerged, once again the polished professional. He thought about going in to his office, but as far as everybody was concerned he was at the DA's office all morning. At the moment he felt no great need to change that. It had been a long time since he'd 'played hookey.'

He went down to the hotel coffee shop for the morning's caffeine infusion and a copy of the newspaper. He skipped over the 'important' stuff, going straight to the automotive section of the classifieds. His eyes skimmed over the private sales, but mostly focused on the dealer ads. He'd almost talked himself into it �

Eventually, it was time to head out. He walked outside, realizing that it was one of those rare, absolutely perfect fall days. There was just a hint of crispness in the air, and the sky was actually blue instead of hazy. Too bad he really wasn't in the mood to enjoy it.

Jack was already there when he got to the restaurant. As he sat down, the attorney grinned at him. "Rough morning?"

Skoda growled. "Damned alarm clock was off by 12 hours."

Jack looked at him, confused. "Somebody messed with your alarm? Or did you just get a new one and screw it up yourself?"

Emil realized he'd slipped. Of course, HIS alarm would have been fine. He thought for a minute about how much he should say. He'd only been working with McCoy and the D.A.'s office for a few months now. So far he had a very cordial working relationship with McCoy, but it hadn't had a chance to become what you'd call personal. // So maybe it's time to change that! And besides, who else can you ask about the bike? //

He shrugged. "It's a hotel alarm clock. You'd think for what they charge for a night they could have them set right!"

Jack frowned. "What on earth are you doing in a hotel room?"

Skoda sighed. "Suzanne threw me out. It's over."

Eyes wide with surprise, Jack was a bit taken aback. "Emil, I�m sorry � I didn't know you were having problems?"

Skoda shook his head. He didn't want to get into the details. "I'm not sure I was aware of it either, Jack. But what's done is done. I really don't want to think about it."

McCoy nodded. "I hear you. I've been there, Emil. If you want to talk later �" he just let the offer hang out there.

"Well, there is one thing �"

Jack looked up curiously; he hadn't really expected Skoda to take the offer. And he was doubly surprised when the shrink grinned.

"I've decided that if I'm going to have a mid-life crisis, I might as well do it right. I'm thinking of buying a motorcycle."

Jack laughed. "Well, that I can certainly help with! What did you have in mind?"

"Well, back in my bohemian youth, I had an Indian. That was one sweet bike. But I have no idea what the market looks like now."

"You? Rode an Indian?"

"That so hard to believe? Come on, Jack! You know what the 60's were like!"

Jack had to laugh. He never would have pegged Skoda as a bike enthusiast. It was kind of nice to find some common ground outside of work. He'd come to enjoy Skoda's dry sense of humor. Maybe this would give them a chance to get to know each other better.

"OK, I guess I can see it. When was the last time you were on one?"

"Let's say it's been a while; I could probably use a refresher."

"Well, I'm not doing anything this weekend; you want to get together Saturday? You could take my bike out for a spin and see if you've still got your legs, then we could go shopping."

The shrink grinned. "That's perfect. Thanks, Jack, I really appreciate this."

"Hey, no problem."

For the next hour they discussed the case at hand; the murder of a young boy, it appeared at the hands of two little girls. It was really beginning to seem that one of those sweet little girls was almost evil incarnate. Not a pleasant case. But Skoda found it refreshing to think about something, anything, but his problems for a little while.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As the week wore on, the case wore more and more heavily on Jack McCoy. This child, this 10-year-old, seemed to know instinctively just how to play the system. On the stand, she was all sweetness. You simply couldn't believe the things she was accused of were true. And yet, at other times, you could see it in her eyes. It hadn't been an accident. She had known exactly what she was doing. There was a true monster in there, one that hated boys, and would grow up to hate men. Even now, she used her charms to approach them, smiling sweetly before closing in for the kill. Jack had seen it; after her acquittal, in the hallway. There had been a little boy walking with his mother. The look in her eyes sent a chill through Jack's body, leaving him suddenly uninterested in lunch.

Heavy hearted, he went back to One Hogan Place and poured his lunch from a bottle of scotch. He was already on the second one when he realized there was a presence in the doorframe of his office. He raised the glass in a toast. "Adam."

The D.A. grunted. "I take it that's not a celebratory drink in your hand?"

Jack shook his head. "Adam, what I just can't figure out is why Liz Olivet was so determined to 'save' this child. How can she have worked with her and not known? There's nothing there to save. Men have called their ex-wives black widows since time began, but this girl's the real thing."

Adam finally moved from his vantage point leaning on the door frame, coming to stand right over Jack's desk. "This one really got to you, Jack. When was the last time you took a vacation?"

Jack's face twisted in a grimace. "I'm fine, Adam."

The D.A. just snorted. "Yeah, right."

Jack just glared silently at him. But in this contest of wills, he didn't have a chance. Finally, he answered the question.

"I took a week last year when you ordered me to �"

Adam shook his head. "That was two and a half years ago, Jack."

Jack was actually surprised; he really had no idea it has been that long. He was beginning to realize he wasn't going to win this one. But he tried one more time.

"Adam, really, I'm fine. If you want, I'll take the afternoon off."

Schifif just glared at him. "Did I say this is optional?" He pointed to the window. "It's a perfectly glorious fall, Jack. Why don't you take that suicide machine of yours out, get out of the city for a while? Clear your head."

Jack sighed and leaned back in his chair, looking out the window. Fall was the perfect time for riding. And he had to admit, he really wasn't in the mood to jump back into the ring right now. And now that he thought about it, there was somebody else who might just welcome a bit of a get-away right about now. Yeah, that could be good �

"All right, Adam, you win. I'm out of here. See you a week from Monday."

Schiff gave a satisfied grunt and left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Emil Skoda was no more satisfied with the outcome of this case than McCoy was. He knew Liz Olivett professionally, but this was the first time they'd ever stood on opposite sides. The woman was maddening in her true belief that no child was beyond saving. He wondered how she had ever handled the consulting work he was now doing for the D.A.'s office. From what he knew of Jack McCoy, she must have driven the man nuts.

In some corner of his brain, Skoda the psychologist knew that part of his anger was just redirecting the anger he felt at Suzanne. But Skoda the man didn't care; right now all he saw was another soft-hearted woman who had walked all over him, dismissing his valid concerns.

With the case before the judge today, he hadn't had any clients scheduled. After the Judge's decision, he went back to his office and sulked around a bit, then decided that maybe he'd better leave before he scared Angela away. It was damned hard these days to find a good secretary, and at the moment he wasn't feeling particularly charitable to women.

He didn't want to go home to the hotel room, though, so instead he headed over to the bar frequented by most of the D.A.'s office. Maybe Jack would stop in for a drink to decompress. // Or somebody else I know // he amended quickly. He was kind of surprised by how much he was hoping Jack would stop by. There was something comfortable about the attorney; from the first day they'd met, he'd felt a connection. And after their lunch Monday, it looked like maybe a personal friendship might have a chance.

He wasn't disappointed. About 2PM, McCoy walked through the door, his suit traded for jeans. The sour look on his face vanished when he noticed Skoda sitting at the bar.

"Emil! Come to nurse your wounds too?"

Skoda raised his glass in greeting. "Thought I'd better get out of the office before I bit my secretary's head off one too many times."

Jack chuckled. "Know what you mean. I never like to lose, but this one � that child scares me, Emil." The laughter vanished from his voice.

Skoda just shook his head. "She's a full-blown psychopath, Jack, she should scare you. She's going to hurt a lot of people before she's eventually put away. And despite what Liz thinks, I doubt there's anything that can be done to prevent it." He downed the last of his drink and waved the bartender for another one, and whatever Jack wanted.

"Was she like this when working your side of the street?"

Jack sighed. "Sometimes. It's gotten worse recently, I'm really not sure why. I have to say I'm glad you're on the team now instead of her."

The bartender delivered their drinks, and Jack raised his in a toast. Emil grinned, accepting the compliment, and clinked his glass against Jack's.

As Jack drank, an idea popped into his head. He glanced at his wristwatch. "You know, bike dealers are a lot less crowded on a weekday afternoon than they are on Saturdays. And I'd sure as hell like to forget about this damned case for a while."

Skoda's face lit up. "Now that sounds like a damned good idea! But don't you have to get back to work?"

Jack shook his head. "Adam kicked me out." For the moment he held back about the vacation; he wanted to see how this went first. "So, have you started looking yet?"

Skoda grinned. "Well, a little. I guess the classic mid-life crisis bike is a Harley � they've got this sweet little number called the Softail."

Jack groaned. "Yeah, that's what every 50-something biker wannabe gets. OK, first � how are you planning on using it? Just to get around the city? Or do you want more of a road cruiser, something to escape with on the weekends?"

"Oh! Hey, I hadn't thought of that." Images of taking off alone � or better yet, with somebody interesting � into the countryside flashed through his mind. A dreamy smile crossed his face. "Yeah, I like that idea."

"OK, next question. There are really BIG road cruisers, like the big Harleys and the Honda Gold Wing. With a Gold Wing, you can take everything except the kitchen sink. Lots of cargo area. But I think you lose a lot of the feel of the ride; it's almost like riding in a small car."

Skoda shook his head. "No, not one of the real big ones. I want to feel the road, the freedom. That's why I kind of liked the Softail."

Jack had to admit that the Harley wouldn't be a bad choice. There was just something in him that didn't like following the well-beaten path. But if it was what Emil wanted, well, it was his bike, after all.

"OK, you're right, that's not a bad choice. Tell you what; let's go over to the Hogan Place garage. You can take a spin on my Yamaha to see if you've still got your legs, and then we'll go test-drive a Softail."

They spent the rest of the afternoon playing with their big boys' toys. The phrase 'it's like riding a bike' turned out to be true; Emil was a little rusty on shifting, but on the whole his body remembered how to ride a motorcycle, even taking curves. At 7:30, they drove away from the Harley Dealership side by side, Jack on his Yamaha (despite the sales guy's best efforts to get him off that 'rice burner' and onto a REAL bike), and Emil on his new Softail, complete with a shiny new helmet which matched the deep red paint job of the gas tank and a good leather riding jacket.

They chased each other around the city for about an hour, Jack making sure not to let things get out of hand, until finally he pulled into a parking lot. Emil followed and pulled up beside him. As he took off his helmet, Jack could see his face was flushed with the excitement and pure joy of riding. He couldn't help grinning in return.

"I don't know about you, but I'm starved. There's a great Greek place right around the corner from here."

"Sounds great! Lead on!"

They secured their helmets to the bikes and locked the wheels, then walked the short distance to the restaurant.

When the waiter brought their drinks, Skoda raised his glass to his companion. "Thanks, Jack, I haven't had this much fun in a very long time."

Jack nodded. "Me too, Emil." Their glasses clinked, and they drank. Jack looked at Skoda over the rim of his glass. You found friendships in the most unexpected places. He realized he'd made up his mind hours ago, just hadn't had a chance to bring it up.

"What's your schedule look like next week?"

Skoda seemed surprised by the change of subject. "Uh, not too much. A couple of regular clients. We weren't sure how long this case was going to take, so I kept things to a minimum."

Jack grinned. "Adam didn't just throw me out for the day. He reminded me I haven�t taken a vacation in two and a half years. I'm thinking of hitting the road, driving out to the Pocono mountains in Pennsylvania. There's this place I've heard about, Bushkill Falls, that supposed to be absolutely gorgeous. I was wondering if you might want to come along? Break in that new bike?"

Skoda hesitated. The psychologist in him warned him not to run away from his problems. But then, sometimes a change of scenery could give you some distance, help put things into perspective. And after today, the idea of spending a week in Jack's company seemed like a good idea. He smiled.

"That sounds great, Jack! I'd love to!"

They spent the rest of dinner making plans. Tomorrow, Thursday, Skoda would contact his clients with appointments next week to reschedule, and they'd leave Friday morning.

After dinner, they walked back to the parking lot, and headed their separate ways.

As Emil drove towards his hotel, he got to thinking. For the past 20-odd years with Suzanne, most of 'their' friends had actually been HER friends. This was the first time in a long time he'd really connected with someone on a personal level. It felt good. Despite the stinging loss in the courtroom this morning, he felt better now than he had in a long time. As he parked the bike in the hotel's garage, he realized that he'd even relaxed enough to savor one of the pleasures of riding he'd forgotten about � having that big engine rumbling between his legs had left him with an erection. He wore a satisfied smile as he headed toward the elevator.

Continut on to Chapter 2

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Disclaimer: These characters belong to Dick Wolf and NBC. I'm just borrowing them for fun, not profit.

Chapter 1

After watching J.K. Simmons in 'The Closer', Stef and I were lamenting his absence from L&O. The good Dr. Skoda was such an interesting character, and he and Jack had such interesting chemistry ...