| Touching a Dream |
| As it turned out, shopping with Bob wasn't quite the chore clothes shopping usually was. Bob's fascination with the very idea of a shopping mall kept them entertained on the ride over. When they got out of the car, Bob just stood there taking it all in. "My god, Harry, it's huge! All these cars ... people came in every one of them? How many people are in there?"
Harry's mental laughter tickled at his mind. It was a uniquely pleasant feeling. // Thousands, probably. Some of them work in the stores, but most are probably here for the same general reason we are. // Bob shook his head. // Harry, I'm not sure about this ... I ... haven't had a lot of experience lately with crowds ... sorcerers tend to be a solitary lot. // Harry could feel Bob's fear. He'd crossed his arms over his midsection, hugging himself. Harry took control over his left arm, his fingers gently roaming over Bob's right. // Take it easy, Bob, // he soothed. // I�m right here. If you lose it, I'll take over. It'll be ok. // The words were almost lost in the warm protectiveness of Harry's presence surrounding him. Bob had never felt so ... cared for. It was immensely reassuring. He squeezed Harry's arm in acknowledgement, then took a deep breath and settled himself. // Into the breach, then ...! // Harry steered them to the nearest entrance, through the doors, and set a leisurely pace down the hallway. He'd intended to let Bob take over, but the ghost was so busy staring around he'd forget to walk. So Harry kept them going, slowly, trying not to walk into anyone or anything when Bob had his eyes pointed somewhere other than directly ahead. They passed a number of shops; most of them featuring women's clothing, but also a shoe store, jewelry store, music shop, drug store. Bob actually found himself confounded by much of what he saw. What most interested him was the people. Women pushing babies in strollers. Teenaged kids 'hanging around.' Couples walking together, holding hands. It very quickly became apparent to him that Harry's appallingly casual wardrobe truly was the norm these days. Some of the women were dressed nicely, if not formally. But the men were pretty universally a sorry lot. "Woah, Harry! Was that ... ?" Bob suddenly took over their legs and rooted into place in front of a storefront. The mannequins in the window were wearing nothing bras and panties. Once again, Harry's chuckle tickled at him. // Close your mouth, Bob. It's a Victoria's Secret store. You've seen the catalogs ... // He felt his body reacting as Bob oogled the nearly naked female forms of the mannequins. Somehow Bob remembered to keep his reply silent. // You mean they actually have stores? Women buy these things in public? // // Yes, Bob, they have stores. Now come on, before somebody has us arrested for being a perv. // Harry took over again, noticing that his jeans were feeling a bit uncomfortably tight. He needed to distract Bob. Luckily, just up ahead was the food court. // So Bob, what do you want for lunch? // Bob's focus finally shifted from the lingerie store to what was in front of them. A dozen or so storefronts offered more different kinds of food than he'd seen in his entire life. His eyes got wide as he gazed around at the options. "My god, Harry!" was all he got as an answer. Harry gave him a few minutes to take it all in, then prodded again. // Are you going to choose, or do I? // // Perhaps you should, Harry. I really have no idea. Just the smells are overwhelming! // // Feeling adventurous? // // Perhaps. As long as it's something you enjoy, I should too ... // Harry headed over to the Chinese place and got an order of General Cho's chicken. The nuggets of meat were breaded and tossed with a spicy red sauce and a smattering of vegetables, served over rice. A coke completed the meal. He took it over to a table, and settled in. Bob looked at the food, sniffing cautiously. It did smell good. Harry started him off, cutting the largish nuggets of chicken into manageable chunks, then shoving a forkful of assorted chicken, rice and veggies into his mouth. The spicy sauce caught Bob completely by surprise; it was a good thing Harry was taking care of the chewing and swallowing at that point. The cold sweetness of the soda came as an unexpected contrast, cleansing his palate and washing everything down. // Oh, Harry! That's wonderful! // He could almost feel Harry grinning in the background. // Bit different? // // Completely! // Harry waited, letting Bob take over the eating now that he knew what to do. It was a tremendous kick, 'watching' Bob enjoy a meal like this. Knowing he was able to give this gift to someone he loved so dearly ... funny, it was getting easier and easier to think about Bob and the l-word in the same sentence. // Guess I'm getting used to it ... // "Used to what, Harry?" Bob replied between bites. // Huh? Nothing ... sorry about that, didn't realize I was verbalizing ... // He noticed a guy at the next table looking at him weird for talking to himself. They really did have to be careful about that. Besides, it still unnerved Harry a bit to hear his own voice colored by Bob's accent and phrasing. As Bob finished the meal, Harry noticed a cute girl sitting at a table by herself. And saw the answer to their problem. As soon as Bob was done, he took over, bussed the tray, and headed across the way. // Hang on, Bob, let's stop in here. // Harry ducked into an electronics store. He could feel Bob's confusion when he made a beeline for the wall of cell phone accessories. // Harry? You've always complained that the first time you use magic around this technological stuff, it stops working. // Harry ignored him and took his selection to the cash register and paid for it. Once outside the store, he tore open the packaging, tossed it away, and fitted the gadget to his right ear. "Testing 1-2-3. OK, great, thanks. You see, Bob, this is a wireless earpiece for a cell phone." // But you don't have a cell phone, Harry ... // came the confused reply. �Doesn't matter, Bob. The phone could be in my pocket. Doesn't have to be visible. When you walk around apparently talking to yourself and you're wearing one of these, people just figure there's somebody else on the other end of the call. Nobody thinks twice about it anymore." // Ah. Remarkable! // Bob remembered when he'd first encountered a telephone. Even to him it had seemed like magic. He'd seen many changes in his long life, and it certainly seemed that things were changing faster and faster the longer he 'lived.' Harry could feel Bob's discomfiture. He spotted a bench. Taking a seat, he asked "Bob? You ok?" // I ... it's all so overwhelming, Harry. // He glanced around at their surroundings. On a weekday afternoon, it wasn't very crowded by modern standards. Even so, there were a good number of people milling around, some focused on their business, others laughing and talking with friends. Harry didn't know what to say, so instead he reached out, his left hand gently touching Bob's arm, reassuring. Bob sighed softly, accepting the comforting gesture. // I'll be all right, Harry. Sometimes it just hits me how distanced I've become from everything I knew. // "I can't even imagine what this is like for you, Bob," Harry said softly, his thumb brushing gently back and forth over Bob's arm. Bob turned his wrist, catching Harry's hand in his. // Just being here with you makes it better, Harry. Having a friend, a ... // dare he say it? // a lover, to share it with makes it much easier. // Harry felt the heat rising up his neck at Bob's words. But he kinda liked how it made him feel. // Bob! We're in public, here! // Suddenly coming back to the 'real world,' Bob let go of Harry's hand. // Erm. Sorry about that ...! // He had to chuckle at Harry's reaction; luckily it wasn't audible to the rest of the world. Now that they were back on more solid emotional ground, Harry got up and resumed their journey, heading into one of the more upscale men's stores. The trick was going to be avoiding a well-meaning but destined-to-be disappointed sales clerk. Bob looked around, pleased that this shop seemed to be a bit more upscale than what he'd seen outside so far. It seemed there might be something in between full formal and full casual after all. Harry let Bob take over again, wandering through the shop, reaching out to touch various fabrics. "My word, Harry," Bob murmured as he sampled a cashmere sweater. "So soft!" He could feel as well as hear Harry's mental chuckle. // Expensive, too. Should have known you'd go for the good stuff! // Smiling, Bob turned to another rack and let out a soft gasp as he touched the fabric. "Oh, perfect!" Harry was a bit confused. It was a shirt made of chamois, buttery soft to the touch, but rather casual in design. The color also confused him � it was a rich golden color, almost like burnished bronze. He rather liked it himself, but it didn't strike him as Bob's style. // Come on, Harry, you've got to try that on. // Bob's mental voice nagged. // Huh? I thought we were shopping for you? // // I've seen what I need to see, Harry. I can come up with something suitable now. But you promised ... // // Oh. // He had promised. Harry glanced at the price tag; easily twice what he'd usually pay for a shirt. But it did feel wonderfully soft in his hands. And if Bob was going to be feeling him up ... it seemed the least he could do. // OK. // He fished around in the rack to find one the right size, then glanced around to find the fitting room. Usually, he wouldn't bother, but with that price tag, he might as well make sure. And besides, Bob seemed eager to see him in it. Stepping into the booth, Harry shrugged off the backpack with Bob's skull in it, placing it carefully on the floor in the corner. He pulled off the shirt he was wearing, draping it over the door. As he turned, he happened to glance in the mirror, and immediately felt Bob looking hard, enjoying the view. Harry shrugged into the shirt, kind of surprised himself how soft it felt even from the inside. He buttoned it up, leaving the collar open, and tucked the tails into his jeans. It fit snug to his body, but not tight. Even the sleeves were long enough for his long arms, a problem he often had with cheaper shirts. He faced the mirror, letting Bob get a good look. He had to admit, the color really worked. He wouldn't have thought of it, but Bob did have rather good taste. // Oh, Harry! // The ghost's deep voice practically purred. // Magnificent! // Harry could feel Bob's appreciation growing inside his pants. Then Bob took over, his arms coming up to caress Harry through the shirt, feeling the hard muscles beneath the soft fabric. "Yes ..." // Whoa! Easy there, Bob! Public, remember? // Harry's mind cried out. He suddenly felt dizzy, shaky. And then the world went black. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The first thing he was aware of was that his stomach felt queasy. The second thing was that Bob was gone. // Bob? // his mind cried out, looking for his friend. When there was no answer, Harry carefully opened his eyes. At first things were a bit fuzzy, but they quickly started to come into focus. A young woman bent over him, an EMT badge on the shoulder of the jacket she was wearing. Seeing he was awake, she quickly shone a bright light into his eyes, then away. "Take it easy, Mr. ...?" Harry lay there blinking, temporarily blinded by that light. "Dresden. Harry Dresden." She nodded. "Mr. Dresden, do you remember what happened?" Harry tried to sit up. His stomach thought about protesting, but let it go. "I was trying on a shirt ..." He noticed he was still wearing it, but the cuffs had been unbuttoned and the sleeves pushed up over his elbows. Frowning, he tried to remember. "I just suddenly felt dizzy ..." He looked up at her, hoping she had the rest of the story. The tech steadied him and nodded. "You passed out, Mr. Dresden. Have you been taking any medication?" He could see the look in her eyes. Read: any illegal drugs? "No ... nothing. Not even aspirin." She looked at him like she didn't quite believe him. But there were no tracks on his arms, and they hadn't found anything � pharmaceutical - in his backpack, so ... she checked his pulse and blood pressure one more time. "Well, you seem fine now. But I would suggest you come to the hospital for a checkup. People don't faint with no good reason." Hospital. No. He had to find Bob. He couldn't lose him again. Not now. And he couldn't waste time being dragged to a hospital. He felt panic rising. "Uh, I'd rather not." The tech shook her head. Another druggie wanting to avoid being caught. But she couldn't force him. "All right then. But please see your own doctor as soon as you can." "Yeah, sure, I will." While she gathered up her equipment, Harry clambered to his feet, only to find a pale, sweaty looking store manager waiting for him. "Um, Mr., ah Dresden, is it?" Harry nodded. "You're sure you're all right?" Harry took a deep breath and a couple of steps. He felt fine. "Yeah, sure." The manager was clearly afraid of a lawsuit. "It's probably just something I ate ... been feeling a little off all day." "Oh. All right then." The manager looked visibly relieved. Harry glanced around. Where was Bob? "Hey, where's my backpack?" "Oh! The EMT had it ... she was checking to see if you were taking any medication ..." // Shit! // No wonder she thought he was a drugged-out weirdo. Who else would carry around a carved human skull ... Harry found it and his old shirt on the floor near where he'd been laying, apparently dragged out of the fitting room when he collapsed. He reached in, his fingers wrapping reflexively around the skull. // Bob? // he asked, his heart pounding. // I'm here, Harry. // Bob's voice came very faintly into his mind. They'd never communicated this way before, but it was the only thing he could think of at the moment, and thankfully it worked. // Are you all right? // Bob's voice was full of worry. // Yeah, I think so. Give me a couple of minutes to get out of here. I'll let you know when it's safe to come out. // // All right. // Harry almost thought he was going to say more, but that was it. Turning back to the manager, all Harry could think about was getting out of there. "Um, I'll take the shirt ... mind if I wear it?" "OH! Oh, yes, that's fine!" The manager reached for a pair of scissors and cut the sales tag from the cuff. Once it was gone, Harry rolled down the sleeves then reached into his back pocket for his wallet. He paid for the shirt, pleasantly surprised that the manager had given him a 10% discount for his troubles ... a blatant bribe to avoid a lawsuit, Harry thought. He'd take it. As soon as he had his change and receipt, Harry made a beeline for the door, out into the mall, and straight out to his Jeep. Even though the car was partly open, it was private enough for Bob to be able to come out of the skull. Nobody would be paying that close attention to them. "Bob? Come on out." The ghostly mist emerged from the skull, flowing out of the opening at the top of the backpack. Bob hesitated a moment before materializing seated in the passenger seat next to Harry. "Harry?" His voice nearly cracked with concern, those ice blue eyes filled with fear. Seeing Bob actually slowed Harry's frantically beating heart. "It's ok, Bob. It's ok. I�m fine." Bob closed his eyes and gave a deep sigh. "Harry, I've been so worried." Harry smiled softly, touched by Bob's concern. He wanted to reach out, offering comfort in return. "Come on back in, Bob. It's ok." Much to his surprise, Bob just shook his head. "I don't think so, Harry. I think I may be what caused you to collapse back there." "What do you mean?" Bob looked quite distraught. "I overloaded your body's nervous system, Harry. Two conscious minds sharing one body can be dangerous. I have heard of this happening before. I just didn't want to think about it. I didn't want to lose you, to lose what we've shared ..." Bob's words hit Harry in the gut. He didn't want to lose it either. There had to be a way ... He took a deep breath, trying to calm down. "OK. It's gonna be ok, Bob. We'll sort it out. Together. Right?" He caught Bob's gaze, held it, the contact almost physical. After what felt like an eternity, Bob's eyes closed and he nodded. "Together. Yes." His usually rich, deep voice was barely a whisper. "Harry, if I've hurt you ..." "Drop it, Bob. I told you I'm fine. Just chill out for now, ok? At least till we get home." Bob finally gave up, dissolving into mist and retreating into his skull. He'd tried once, long ago, to ride in a car. Being non-corporeal, his 'body' didn't pick up momentum from the vehicle around him. He couldn't 'keep up' with the car under his own power. The ride over here earlier today while sharing Harry's body had been a revelation. Seeing the countryside go past at such velocity had been a bit frightening. But it had been such a non-concern to Harry that Bob found he got used to it quite quickly. Would he ever have that joy again? And it was a joy, in so many different ways. Just the purely physical was enough; to be able to touch and taste again, to feel the warmth of the sun on his skin. But even greater was the joy in being able to touch Harry, to feel his love given physical form. Of course, that's what his curse, his punishment, had been intended to deprive him of. He hadn't realized just how lonely he'd been until he'd felt love again. And to have it snatched away from him like this ... it was almost too much to bear. He knew when they had arrived home; he felt his skull being lifted, carried in the backpack. Then Harry's hands reaching in, picking it up, gently placing it on the desk. A gentle caress before he heard that beloved voice. "Come on out, Bob." Not only was he compelled by his curse to obey his 'owner,' his heart compelled him to obey Harry's request. But his body formed slowly, a sign perhaps of his reluctance to face the situation. The look on Bob's face all but broke Harry's heart, redoubling his determination to find a way to make this work. "Listen, Bob, I've been thinking ... are you sure you caused this? I mean, maybe I should go see a doctor ..." Bob shook his head sadly. "I suppose it's remotely possible, Harry. But you've always been rather reliable, medically speaking. Your family doesn't have any of THOSE skeletons in its closet. And I'd know." Harry nodded, accepting Bob's analysis. He really hated doctors, anyway. "OK. Then why didn't this happen yesterday? Or the night before?" "I suppose it took a while to reach a level which overloaded you." Harry nodded. "Just what I was thinking. We were together a lot longer today. Maybe there's just a time limit?" Bob nodded. He longed for the comfort of Harry's arms, but he couldn't dare risk hurting Harry. "And we've run it out." The pain was evident on his craggy face. "Maybe. But is it per session, or cumulative? It's probably just today's time we ran out of," Harry offered. "But what if it's not? If we try again, you could be seriously harmed!" Bob looked practically panicked. Harry reached out as if to take Bob's hands in his, remembering at the last minute that he couldn't. But the gesture was enough. "Bob, it's worth it to me to be able to touch you ... to love you. We'll be careful. Start slow, build up slowly this time." Harry's futile attempt to touch him stabbed Bob in the heart. It was too much. "I can't take that risk! Besides, don't you get it? My curse, my eternal 'life' is a punishment! I'm not SUPPOSED to be happy! Things had gotten too easy, too painless. I wouldn't be surprised if the Council set this all up just to remind me in the most painful way possible!" That was sounding awfully paranoid, especially coming from Bob. He was usually the level-headed one, urging caution. Seeing him like this tore at Harry's heart. "Bob, come on, you're over-reacting. Calm down. Everything's going to be all right." Harry tried to keep his voice soothing, but Bob was having none of it. "Over-reacting? I brought Justin back to life with black magic, then killed him with the same. Where is Morgan? Shouldn't the council's avenging angel have come down on us like the night YOU killed Justin? Why isn't he here? Why haven't we been hauled before them? Because they wanted this to happen! They wanted me to let myself love you ... then lose you ..." Bob's face was contorted with pain. Harry realized that had they been joined, his tears would be flowing freely. He desperately wanted to comfort his friend, his lover. But he couldn't. Couldn't touch, and right now words just weren't getting through. Frustration got the better of him. "Dammit, Bob! Stop it! Just stop it!" He hadn't realized he was shouting. Or that the tears were falling down his cheeks. Bob looked at him, such sadness in those icy blue depths. He couldn't take it, couldn't stand knowing he was hurting Harry. And so he vanished, retreated into his skull, where he could be miserable alone. continue to Chapter 5 Send me some Feedback Back to my Dresden Home page Back to the Jade Palace Home Disclaimer: I don't own them, just borrowing them for fun, not profit. |
| Chapter 4 |