Have you ever really asked yourself, "Who am I?"? I have many times, and the answer was always the same, "I don't really know!". Until recently, that is.
I have been fascinated with the Wiccan faith for as long as I can remember, of course the way I came to call upon this faith as my own is quite interesting.
When I was a young teenager, I had a Ouija board. They were all the rage back then, of course! I was fascinated by the thought of communicating with the spirits. I never went anywhere without it. Although, when I began to learn there was alot more to the possibility than I had thought, there was an entire faith around the idea that I had never even heard of. So, I began to read about it. I had accumulated quite a large selection as a matter of fact, and they have always been kept out of sight. I was content reading by myself about the fascinating faith called Wicca, until recently.
Not too long ago, my family and I had moved into a new house. About a week after, there seemed to be a "peeper" in our midst. When the sun would go down and the moon would come out, there seemed to be someone with a great interest in my house! At first, there seemed to be someone that would come to the back door and try to turn the knob and shake the door, as if the door was simply stuck and they couldn't get in. I would call the local police and they would come out and no one could be found. As the weeks went on, it eventually stopped (after many visits late at night resulting in a police visit to reassure me). A month went by, and nothing. Then it started to happen again, only this time it seemed as if this person was taunting me! I would hear someone tapping on the door or the window, and my dog would start to bark visciously. One night while at home alone with just my 2 children, my dog started to go crazy at my front door. I ignored him at first, told him to shush and go lay down, but he kept barking and jumping at the door so I went over to look. I approached the door and put my hands around my eyes and looked out one of the small window panes in the door, the porch light was not working so I couldn't see otherwise, and the only thing I could see were another set of eyes glazing right back at mine! I was petrified, I hid in the kitchen and called 9-1-1. Hysterical and frantic, I didn't know what to do to protect myself and felt the most awful feeling in the world, helplessness! Not just for myself, but for my children. If I could not keep them safe in my own home, just think of what could happen, I thought. The next day I was talking to my best friend, who is also my sister-in-law, and began discussing my options for protection. I dug out a Blue Topaz stone, that had fallen out of a ring my mother-in-law had given me on my wedding day, and decided to cast a spell of protection upon it. I was telling my friend this, and asking her some questions about turning this stone into a protection amulet, when I started thinking about who I am and what I am! I have no religion, and I believe some parts of many faiths, especially Wicca. My friend gave me some very good advice, along with the ideas of an alarm and outside lighting, she told me to think about calling upon the Celtic Goddess, Brighid, for Protection, and offered to make a protection amulet. I had some doubts about calling upon the Goddess Brighid, because after all I wasn't of the Wiccan faith, or any faith for that matter, but she helped me see that the Gods and Goddess' didn't care what faith I was from, only that I was genuine in my request. I started thinking that night, I have no faith to call upon, no religion to rely on, so who was I?
My friend and I talked quite a bit about faiths, paths, and spirituality after that. During these conversations I began to realize that the only path that I felt completely comfortable with was Wicca. The only question that was left was, which path of Wicca I would choose to follow. I still do not have a sole Wiccan path, for I believe several things from many paths of Wiccan faith, but the generality is there. To be of the Wiccan faith means to be attune with your path, to know yourself, know your Craft, and achieve your balance with nature and the cycles of the Earth. For that, I know, I am now on the path for me. |
