| The Legend of Bob |
| Written By Lavender Poodle |
| Also known as: |
| Time Changes |
| Think Pink |
| The Completely Pointless Story |
| and |
| Black With White Ruffles |
| Once on top of a time (A tall, huge, wooden bloack that counts to 60 over and over again... forever) stood a dude named Greg. He looked down from the top of his Time to the valley of smaller Times below him. Every family in the huge town of tiny Town had their own Time. Greg's Time was the biggest. |
| Greg had three sons, Fred, Garry and Bob. Bob was the youngest and his brothers liked to call him Boberoo. Bob liked this name but pretended to hate it so that they would kepp calling him it. But one day Fred walked into the Tee-pee where they lived and said: "Family, I have decided that I will never die!" and right when he finished saying that he fell over. "I was wrong," he said, and died. There was a great celebration rthat day like there always was when some one died. |
| The next day Garry said, "Golly Gee whiz I wish we could have another party like the one we had when Fred died!" But no one died for weeks and weeks and every day Garry wanted some one to die more and more. "I know!" he cried one day, "I'll die!!" so he tried really really hard to die but when he was dieing he said: "Now we can have another great party again." "Yah!" said Bob, "Too bad you won't be there for it!" "Oops," said Garry and died. There was much rejoicing. |
| The next day Bob's father, Greg, took Bob to the top of their Time and said: "Son, one day all this will be your!" "What? the cutains?" said Bob. "No! The Time!" "What Time is it anyway?" "The one your standing on!" "No, I mean shouldn't we be getting back to dinner?" "Never mind son." |
| But eventually when his parents laid down to rest for a LONG time ( They didn't DIE stup' they just went to sleep for like a hundred years) Bob got the Time. |
| "Cool!" he said without excitement so it came out moer like "cool." Speaking of cool, Bob had decided to get cool and got a wig that made it look like he had a Fro and bought Platform shoes and Disco clothes. He changed his name to Stu and was known and Disco Stu (formally reffered to as bob) |
| Then Stu (formally reffered to as Bob) built a huge Disco shack on top of his time. Then he painted his time trippy colors and programmed it so when it counted it sang, "Yo! disco 1 disco 2 disco 3 I said Yo! disco 4 disco 5..." He played disco music in his disco shack on top of his disco Time all night long. He closed it in the day and slept or shopped. Stu (formally reffered to as Bob) charged people to get in and sold suvinours and drinks and snacks to make money. With the money he sold Purple Gold necklaces and took lessons on talking like a disco person. Unfortunately he got his "Disco Speech" book mixed up with his "Disco Song Book" and it ended up that when he talked he sang "Burn Baby burn, Get me a drink now! Burn Baby burn, do you wanna dance now? I just can't stop." It took him a long time to get sorted out again. |
| But when Stu (formally reffered to as Bob) got older, like in his 30's, he decided that this hot, lively disco life was just a bit too much for him. So Stu (formally reffered to as Bob) completely changed his life... again. He painted his time black with white ruffles, turned his disco shack into a very old-fashioned house and painted it black with white ruffles and every thing inside was black with white ruffles. He sold all his clothes and bought new ones which were black suits with white ruffles. He changed his name back to Bo and married a woman named Martha who wore black dresses with white ruffles. |
| Bob (formally reffered to as Stu formally reffered to as Bob) and Martha had a daughter who dressed in black dresses with white ruffles and all her toys were black with white ruffles, just like ervery thing else. The named her Bertha Witting Wammer Roedona, so her initials were BWWR, which also stands for Black with White Ruffles. Bob (foramlly reffered to as Stu formally reffered to as Bob) refused to be reffered to as Disco Stu and wouldn't even admit that that part of his life exsisted. If anyone called him Stu, or Disco Stu, or even asked him to party or to dance he would point a huge, fake gun at them and yell "I don't know you!!!" at the top of his loungs. |
| Bob (formally reffered to as Stu formally reffered to as Bob) took up yodeling, and every day from 5am-8am and from 7pm-9pm he yodeled. You could listen to him close for a dollar but no one ever came close because he was so loud you could hear him from the valley. He was so loud that he and his wife and kid all went deaf and spent the rest of their lifes saying "Eh? eh? whats that?" So they moved far away to a huge city were every thing was overyl loud so they could hear. But their plan back fired and they just got MORE deaf if that is possible. |
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