| When God Created Mothers.... |
| When the good Lord was creating mothers He was into His |
| doing a lot of fiddling around on this one." |
| sixth day of "overtime" when an angel appeared and said, "Your |
| And the Lord said, "Have you read the specs on this order?" |
| She has to be completely washable, but not plastic; |
| Have 180 moveable parts...all replaceable; |
| Run on black coffee and leftovers; |
| Have a lap that disapears when she stands up; |
| A kiss that can cure anything from a broken leg to a |
| disapointed love affair; |
| And six pairs of hands; |
| The angel shook her head and said, "Six pairs of |
| hands...no way." |
| "It's not the hands that are causing me problems," said the |
| Lord. 'It's the three pair of eyes that mothers have to have." |
| "That's on the standard model?" asked the angel. |
| The Lord nodded. one pair that sees through closed doors |
| when she asks" What are you kids doing in there?' when she already knows. Another here in the back of her head that sees what she shouldn't |
| but what she has to know, and of course the ones here in front that can |
| look at a child when he goofs up and say,"I understand and Iove You" |
| without so much as uttering a word." |
| "Lord," said the angel. touching his sleeve gently,Come to |
| bed. Tomorrow..." |
| " I Can't," said the Lord,I'm so close to creating |
| something so close to myself. Already I have one who heals herself when |
| and can get a nine-year-old to stand under a shower." |
| The angel circled the model of a mother very slowly. |
| "It's too soft," she sighed. |
| "But tough!" said the Lord excitely. "You cannot imagine |
| what this mother can do or endure." |
| "Can it think?" |
| "Not only can it think, but it can reason and compromise," |
| said the Creator. |
| Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the |
| cheek. "There's a leak," she pronounced. I told You You were trying to |
| put too much into this model." |
| "It's not a leak," said the Lord, it's a tear." |
| "What's it for?" |
| "It's for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain,loneliness |
| and pride." |
| she is sick... can feed a family of six on one pound of hamburger... |
| "You are a genius," said the angel. |
| The Lord looked somber. "I didn't put it there." |
| Erma Bombeck |
| This page is dedicated to all Mothers everywhere. A special thanks to Erma, America's funniest Mother,whose self-depreciation humor will always be fondly remembered. |
| Happy Mothers Day! |
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