At the Gates
The fight wasn't unusual, nor was it a difficult one. Both had been scratched, pulled, yanked and torn from side to side, but no real damage.
In fact the only thing unusual with this band of 6 Athenian Rebels, was a statement made by one of the 'Leaders' (I say leader, all that means in a group of Athenian Rebel's is the one with the longest hair!). At the time of attack they had shouted – quite unceremoniously I might add, "For the Goddess we attack". Having heard this a numerous amount of times, Xena wasn't fazed, it was a good technique to use on anyone naïve enough to believe that a rabble of men would do any biding for a Goddess.
Once the battle was won, and the few bloodied wounds on the pair were wrapped suitably, they continued on their journey certain in the knowledge that they would not be followed. Xena had knocked them unconscious long enough for them to get to the village, plus Gabrielle was sure that they wouldn't want to attempt another morning surprise, when she thought back they almost looked as if they didn't want to have anything to do with the female pair. Perhaps their original cry had been true, perhaps their bidding was for a Goddess.
As she pondered on this thought, the steady role of Xena's voice permeated them.
"Did you get the distinct impression they didn't want to have any part in that fight?"
Her voice was heavy, and musky.
"I was just attempting to work out who could have sent them. Do you think there was anything in the "For the Goddess" cry?" It was amazing how, after this length of time, one's thoughts would often mirror the others.
"Maybe. But it's unlikely, only one Goddess could command Athenian Rebels, and you're her chosen, so that can't be it. Unless… Ares. He could have impersonated Athena and lead the Rebel's…" Her thoughts had got the better of her, disliking verbal communication, now she only spoke in her mind.
"Xena, come on, we both know how Ares likes his ego and he thinks he has the power to command armies. I don't think he would stoop to those levels, not yet anyway." Gabrielle stifled a laugh, Xena turned to her companion "Even if the army is 6 men wide and 2 keep fumbling around their own hair." She could no longer contain it, and she found the pair of them were laughing at the comical scene.
Finding a suitable inn close to the outskirts, they tended to Argo and entered. Seating themselves towards the back of the room (so as to not shock the villager and travellers), Gabrielle attended to bartering for 2 mugs of Mead.
Xena slowly scanned those in the bar: 3 tables of men who seemed to be locals, a few travellers dotted around. The villagers were easy to spot: they were all drunk, having spent the majority of the day indulging.
Beginning to feel drowsy she started to look towards Gabrielle's direction. She couldn't see her young Bard anywhere; in fact she was finding it difficult to see anything. Something was wrong.
Xena's energy was starting to deplete – rapidly, where had Gabrielle gone? Why was everyone standing up? Where had all the lights suddenly come from?
Nothing.
Just darkness.
Quiet.
***
Awaking with a start, Xena found herself in unfamiliar territory. With a new burst of energy she jumped from the patch of ground where she had found herself laying and leapt to her feet.
Her hand moving swiftly to her hip she realized she was naked. This did not worry her, as despite her initial reaction she sensed nothing that could put her in risk.
This didn't resolve the fact that she wasn't clothed however.
Taking the time to look around her surroundings, she noticed that she was in a meadow. Only a small clearing, surrounded by foliage and dense forest, but the grass was lush underfoot.
Her initial thought was to try and find somewhere to acquire clothing; however this was fleeting, as despite being without clothing, she was missing her friend.
She called loudly, several times but to no avail.
Xena began to run away from the brush and into the forest hoping that she would find some signs of life, she was sure if Gabrielle had experienced the same thing she would undoubtedly still be asleep. Which led her to another unanswered question - what had happened? She hadn't sensed anyone who could have dumped them.
She suddenly stopped running.
She'd been in this situation before: They were back in Illusia, surely.
With this realisation, as if on cue, the forest in front of her began to thin, if only slightly, it was still noticeable. Walking towards it, it thinned to nothing, and instead of dense thick of trees there now stood a building. One Xena recognised.
Striding towards it, the door opened, and out stepped a woman Xena knew only too well.
Cyrene.
***
"Xena, my darling!" Her mother yelled, hitching up her skirt she ran towards the Warrior Princess.
Xena smiled. A friendly face in Allusia - that was a good thing, no Callisto in sight.
After the initial hugs and kisses and "My, you seem to get stronger every time I see you." Also the obligatory, "Both Meg and Diane came to see me more than you, and neither are my children! Maybe we outta get you dressed!" Cyrene dragged her daughter inside to dress and feed her well.
"I have to find Gabrielle; I think that’s why I'm here... again." Xena was now fully dressed and becoming distressed at the loss of her companion.
"Where exactly do you think you are, sweetheart?" Came the soft reply. They were seated at one of the many free tables in Cyrene's tavern.
"I know where I am, but I don't understand why I'm back in Illusia. Gabrielle and I hold nothing from one another now." Xena claimed hopefully.
Cyrene snorted slightly. "Oh my sweet, strong angel. You really think you're in Illusia? Oh dear. Well, I can tell you now: You aren't in Illusia." At this she paused, her daughters piercing glare was too much. She looked into the blue eyes, so like her own. "You’re in Elysia Xena, which means..." Cyrene softened her voice, "You died, Xena, you died in that Tavern."
Xena couldn't comprehend the thought. She couldn't have died, not just like that. Not just dropped stone dead. "No." She said strongly. She stood up offensively. "No, that isn't true, I felt nothing to indicate illness and we both got through the fight no problem."
"Xena, sit down, I have to show you something. Trust me, sit down."
***
"Look at your arm; didn't you notice it as you dressed? The wound on your arm." She looked to both arms. On her right forearm were the remnants of an arrow wound, from the fight earlier in the day.
"You know what 'm saying is true, Xena. When someone dies from a wound, when they cross to the Elysian Fields, the wound that killed them remains for a short while; it has a stronger power than any others they may have received. I'm sorry my angel, but you know I'm telling you the truth. The same is true for Gabrielle. As far as I've been told it was a poisoned arrow that hit you both. The effects are quick, and even you wouldn't have known about it."
Xena was finding it all too hard to comprehend. She had died. Both she and Gabrielle.
"You knew I was going to die? Then where is Gabrielle? Why isn't she here with me?" Her thoughts were starting clarify.
"Yes, we're all told when our closest are about to cross. Basically so that we can prepare for their arrival. I know it's hard. Maybe you want to lie down, or would you prefer a drink? Xena, please, come on, how about a good mug of ale?" Xena nodded slowly. She needed something, definitely.
"Mom, where is Gabrielle, you knew she was coming. Where is she?" Xena looked towards her mother.
"Let me get a few drinks, we'll discuss Gabrielle when I get back." Xena became worried by her mothers change in tone. She drummed her fingers on the table, something she often did when agitated.
On her return, Cyrene placed a large mug of what smelled like strong ale in front of her, and another across the table for herself.
Cyrene took a deep breathe and sighed.
"Xena, me darling," She sighed again, "there was a complication when Gabrielle crossed." Xena took a large gulp of her ale.
"What kind of complications?" She said slowly and angrily.
"You know the rules of Elysia; it is a haven for the Heroes." She laughed lightly, "Only Zeus knows why I ended up here." Xena's face didn't move. "Well the problem is that the Gabrielle isn't really classed as a hero here. Not fully, from what I've been told, you weren't supposed to cross yet. However the Fate's couldn't intervene this time - much to their disgust. You are an obvious hero so you it was inevitable you would come here, but Gabrielle was fated to do something, something that would have given her passage." Cyrene stopped.
"Where is she?" Xena's face showed her anger, however her voice was smooth, containing her ferocity.
Cyrene began, speaking slowly. "This doesn't happen often Xena, and it wasn't counted upon. Because she was supposed to be given passage, but didn't fulfil her fate she has to sit at the gates." With this Xena stood and headed to the door. Cyrene stood about to follow when her daughter turned back to her.
"Who told you all this? Who told you where she is?" Xena stood rock still awaiting her answer.
"Cronos created a guide... Medisian." Cyrene realised what she was about to do.
"Where will I find Medisian?" Still Xena showed no emotion except anger in her face.
"He'll be at the river Lethe... But Xena, you know he cannot change what has happened." Cyrene implored.
"I have to try." With that Xena left her mothers tavern.
***
Xena knew the rules of Elysia. She willed herself to the River Lethe, and there it flowed, right before her feet.
"Xena! So you wish to visit Oblivion? I'm surprised; I thought you were stronger than that." The voice was unfamiliar, yet she knew it must belong to only one person.
"Medisian, I presume?"
"You may presume. Because I am." He laughed gently. Medisian was a friendly looking gentleman. Garbed in a long grey cloak, very much like the ones of worshipping Priests. His hair was grey and fell below on his shoulders in a ragged, unkempt manner, but his face was full of joy and laughter.
"I don't need to introduce myself then. You obviously know me, and the fate of my companion." She said sternly.
"Ah. Gabrielle. Yes, I know. She was an unexpected. I know what you're going to ask for, and Xena the decision cannot be changed." Medisian lowered his hood. "The decision came from a higher power. Even I questioned the decision, but it's no good. Gabrielle didn't fulfil her potential as a hero. Only she could change that."
"I don't believe that is the only way. I will go to the fates; they will decide who is right here." Xena was filled with determination. Medisian lilted a chuckle.
"Xena, even with your determination - this cannot be changed. Gabrielle will remain there. She did not fulfil her fate. Unless she does she will not enter Elysia." Medisian sighed. "I feel her you know. She hasn't been awake too long. Why don't you go and speak with her. She's afraid and confused. You must calm her. I ask that you explain the situation to her. It would be better to come from you. Go Xena, please. Theirs nothing I can do now. It's down to you." Medisian lifted his hood again and turned back to the waters.
***
Without really even thinking Xena found herself at the Gates. The gates were not pearly as you may assume, but made of stone and steel - a true Hero’s welcome.
Sat just at the other side, with her back towards her, was Gabrielle.
"Gabrielle." Xena cried. The blonde woman turned to face her companion, however did not stand. Despite being naked, Gabrielle simply didn't have the energy to stand.
She had, evidently been crying.
Crashing to her knees as close to the gates as possible, Xena wept quietly.
She managed through the tears "I missed you." Gabrielle chuckled,
"I can tell." She strained. "Xena why am I here? If I cannot enter Elysia, surely I should be with Hades?" This time Xena chuckled. Wiping away the tears she drew in a deep breathe. "Gabrielle do you really think you'd be sent to the Underworld? Even you know better than that." Gabrielle clutched at the Gate's bars,
"Then why am I here? Am I in torment? You know when I first awoke I thought we were back in Allusia, then I saw the Gate's and I knew. This is worse.... I don't understand." She began to weep again.
"Gabrielle," Xena reached through the bars and wiped her companions cheek. "I know what's happened. I went to see Medisian who guides those in Elysia in place of his father Cronos. Apparently, we weren't supposed to die yet. Because you hadn't done something, it meant that you weren't classed as a Hero, and cannot enter Elysia. However," Xena sighed, "because you were meant to be here, you have to stay here at the Gates." Both Xena and Gabrielle's tears flowed heavily.
Stuttering, Gabrielle asked "So that's it, I have to stay here for eternity?"
Xena came to her senses somewhat, smearing the tears across her cheek, she paused for a second, and then said, "Maybe not." Her voice suddenly became stronger, full of hope. "Gabrielle, Medisian said 'Only you can change your fate'. Whatever you were supposed to do, maybe you still can." Gabrielle snorted loudly, sniffing. She looked rejected,
"How Xena, I'm stuck here. I can't go anywhere past this line of trees."
"There must be some way." It was beginning to get dark and Xena noticed Gabrielle was shivering. "Listen, I'm going to get some blankets, at least you’ll be warm then. I won't be gone long."
***
"Mom, she's stuck their and I don't know how to help her. There must be something she can do, Medisian wouldn't have said that unless their was a way." Xena was trying to find as many blankets as possibly, and was currently emptying a wooden box in her mother's store cupboard.
"But Xena, you said it yourself: She can't get away from the Gates." Xena stood suddenly.
"Maybe that's it; perhaps it's something that has to go to her." Xena smiled, and then a pain struck her, "Perdicus. It must be something to do with him. He's the most important thing to have crossed, for her. Mom is Perdicus here?" She dropped the blankets and grasped her mother.
"Xena, both you and I know, Perdicus was no warrior. He wasn't a hero. He isn't here." Xena felt rejected yet her heart felt slightly better. Then her mother said, whilst collecting the blankets from the ground,
"Anyway you're more important to Gabrielle than Perdicus ever was. Surely you know that." She stood, and threw the blankets at her daughter, who looked puzzled.
"Oh Xena, don't think I'm stupid." The puzzled expression only broadened.
"What do you mean?" Cyrene's face split, between realisation and almost humour.
There was a long pause. "You never told her." Cyrene laughed. Xena was disgusted by her mother’s amusement.
"Why are you laughing? My best friend is stuck outside the Gates of Elysia for eternity, I have no idea what you're talking about and yet you're laughing!"
Cyrene stopped laughing and beamed. “You know, for an Amazon Princess and a Warrior Princess, you ain't got too many brain cells between you."
"Mom this isn't helping us." Cyrene smiled.
"Girly, you just got it. Don't be an idiot. Everyone knows how you feel about each other, and by that look of denial on your face I gather you never told her. There's no wonder she's stuck outside those Gates," Cyrene was nearly yelling now, "Because you were too stubborn to admit you love her..."
Xena choked back a laugh and spat in the process, “I tell her all the time I love her."
"Yes, as a best friend, as a sister even. But it's more than evident to anyone who meets you it goes deeper than that. You two are the epitome of love. You desire her more than anyone, and the adoration she hold's for you is unmistakable. Geez' girly I thought you had instincts." Her mother sat back onto the closed chest. She tugged at her daughter's arm who sat beside her. "You have to tell her Xena. You don't have to protect yourself against her."
"It's her I'm trying to protect, not me. I don't want her to get hurt." Cyrene sighed,
"Who's going to hurt her here? Not you. Even when you were alive, you would have sacrificed your life before allowing harm to come to her." She sat back. "You know, on the rare occasions you did visit..." She raised her eyebrow knowingly, "I simply assumed that you were together. I wasn't bothered by it. Zeus knows, I was ecstatic that you'd find someone to share your heart with. And I love her Xena, I truly do. She has a light that no-one and nothing can extinguish. That light was partly due to you."
"So what are you saying? That because I didn't tell her how I feel about her, she can't cross? That's stupid, that’s not the act of a warrior. No. It has to be something else." Xena sat back and tried to think.
"No, you're wrong; she didn't cross because you didn't give her chance to tell you how she feels about you. That is the act of a warrior. In the eyes of the Gods she would have to be a hero to tame your heart. Think about it. It makes sense Xena. You know it does. You're just afraid to let her open her heart to you."
Xena cried. She wasn't sure why, release she imagined. Finally she was being told that the feelings she had taken so long to bury and ignore were being worn on her sleeves for everyone to see. The thought that Gabrielle might share her feelings was too much to contain. She wept hard, her head against her mother's shoulder. Cyrene shed a tear also.
"Go to her Xena, make her open her heart. Otherwise she'll be alone out there." Xena stood, picking up the blankets and headed out towards the Gates, without saying anything to her mother as she left.
***
"Here, they were all I could find. You have those and I'll have these." She said, passing several blankets through the bars.
"You were gone a while, I thought you weren't coming back." Gabrielle had obviously cried during their time apart, and her eyes were red from her rubbing them.
"Well, I'll be honest for a moment, I was thinking about it." She laughed, "Of course I wouldn't leave you. You know I wouldn't. We'll both stay right here until we figure out how to get these things to open." Xena lay on the lush grass, and placed the majority of blankets under her head for support.
"So you haven't thought of anything then? I was kinda hoping you would have a plan." Gabrielle decided to sit up, with the blankets covering her.
"Cyrene had a few ideas, but you know my mother, she's always full of ideas." Gabrielle's attention was piqued at this,
"What kind of idea's? Come on Xena, anything's worth a try at this point. Tell me, please." Xena sighed; she had considered what to say if this did come up.
"She thinks..." She sighed again, "She seems to that it might be like when we were Illusia. It was something we had to get out, something that was ripping us apart. But, I mean, we don't hate one another, we don't have anything to say to one another like we experienced in Illusia." She couldn't continue.
"But Xena we worked all that out. It took a while, but we settled our differences. You know I don't hate you, there's no anger in me towards you, and you know that. You're my best friend. If I thought for a moment we would end up how we were over anger, I would simply tell you. It can't be that." Gabrielle lowered her head, she was trying to concentrate but couldn't.
"Gabrielle..." It was time for her to be brave. "How do you feel about me, I mean really?" Gabrielle didn't lift her head; she didn't want her eyes to give her away.
"What do you mean?" Xena couldn't comprehend how to pose the question to her, 'Do you love me, as more than a friend?' was all she had to say, but she knew she couldn't, she had to ease this out of her friend.
"If this is similar to Illusia, then I need you to tell me exactly what you feel." She shifted on the ground made herself comfortable staring up into the moon filled sky.
"Well, why don't you talk for a change Xena? Tell me what you're feeling." Gabrielle was almost amused by the thought of the Warrior Princess revealing herself
"This isn't about me Gabrielle; this is about you and needing to get you through these gates." Gabrielle laughed at this response.
"Why did I expect anything less? It's never about you. Why won't you just let your guard drop? Nothing can get you here. It can't crawl up and bite you here like it could before. Just talk, as if I'm not even here." Gabrielle settled herself into the same position as her companion, laying down, a few blankets under her head, looking up at the sky.
"What do you want me to say?" She didn't raise her head, to anyone who was looking on, she looked as if she was talking to an invisible Goddess.
"Just say what you feel. Right now."
"I feel tired." They both laughed.
"That's usually my line! Anyway, carry on."
"I don't know what to tell you. I'm angry that you're over there and I'm here, all on your own. I don't want you to be stuck there. I was racking my brain back at the Tavern; I thought maybe it was something I had to bring to you. Or someone." Gabrielle sat up, forgetting her promise to stay quiet,
"Perdicus." She said, leaning towards the bars. "How did you feel about bringing Perdicus here to me?"
"I was happy at first, I thought it would help, but of course, it wouldn't help, he isn't here. I'm sorry Gabrielle, but he didn't come here." Xena sat up also now, her hands clasped around the bars. Gabrielle shifted her gaze, she could get lost in those blue eyes.
"I knew he wouldn't be here Xena, he wasn't a hero. He wasn't a Warrior. He got lost every time he left Potideia!" She chuckled, "I knew he wouldn't be here. I don't think I'd really want to see him anyway." Xena was surprised.
"Gabrielle, he was your husband, I though he would have been the first person you would have wanted to see." Gabrielle couldn't look at her.
"I betrayed him Xena, how could I see him now? He'd know I betrayed him." Not for the first time that evening, Xena was shocked.
"How did you betray him? You loved him. It wasn't your fault Callisto found him." Gabrielle shook her head.
"No, I know that, but I didn't love him. I just wanted to make him and my family happy. I thought if I married, my family would be pleased, and I knew he still had feelings for me. But I didn't love him, my affections lay elsewhere, and I can't think of a bigger betrayal." Gabrielle began to cry quietly.
"Oh Gabrielle, that's not wrong wanting to please people. That's not betrayal. The betrayal, if anything was that you weren't true to yourself. That's something you taught me. Be true to yourself." Gabrielle cried loudly know. "Gabrielle, listen to me, you have to do what you think is right, and let your heart lead. It always goes in the right direction. Perhaps I should have listened to that advice."
"Xena, I betrayed you too with this. There's something I should tell you." Gabrielle stood up, wrapping a blanket around her and began to walk towards her imprisoning trees. Xena stood, following suit. Her heart was leading, and if Gabrielle didn't say it, she would. She wouldn't stand to see her love in any more pain.
"Xena, since we've met... I... When I first met you, you were this tower of strength, one I wanted to be just like. I wanted to go with you, learn your ways. Be good. Then I realised that good is inside you, it isn't something that you can emulate and hope for the best. When I realised this, I stopped idolising you, and grew to know you, without that glaze of worship. You inspired me, like no-one else. You’re my soul mate Xena, and I love you more than I could ever tell you." The Warrior Princess dropped her head and fell to her knees, still clinging to the bars. "I'm sorry; I shouldn't be telling you any of this. I'm so sorry for hurting you." Gabrielle rushed to the bars to her friend, she placed her hands around Gabrielle's. Xena looked up into those green eyes.
"You haven't hurt me Gabrielle." She lifted her hand and stroked her soft cheek. "You’re stronger than I ever could be. I couldn't have said that. You’re my hero Gabrielle, and I love you."
There was a blinding light.
***
"Well, that took long enough. It only took you being dead to finally say it."
"It's taken a lot of owed favours for this my little one. I hope you're happy."
"Zeus knows, you should have seen the Fate's when I told them what we were doing. Wow, I mean, talk about angry. Geez!" The pink Goddess of love couldn't contain her excitement "Oh you two... This is wonderful." She clapped gleefully.
Gabrielle turned, she was embracing her Warrior Princess, but on hearing the voices, she pulled away slightly to see who they belonged to.
Realising who it was she fell to her knees. Athena and Aphrodite stood in front of them, in a blaze of light.
"Stand up my little one. Your my chosen, you don't need to kneel before me, and you certainly don't need to need to kneel before this one." Athena, stood smiling, her thumb jerked towards Aphrodite who looked aghast.
Gabrielle realised that both she and Xena were now fully dressed.
Xena, bowed slightly and, gently releasing Gabrielle, stepped forward.
"Mighty Athena..." She began, "Aphrodite." She said in an almost resentful voice. "What happened here? Are we dead?"
Aphrodite laughed. "You wish! No, well... Not really anyway. You were in Illusia. When the gang of retards attacked you, we had them tipped with a serum, made you lucid enough to enter Illusia. I made it look like the Elysian Fields, with the help of Athena here. Then we asked Medisian to step in for a while, he controlled what you both saw. Xena, when you willed something he made it all fancy and that. Cronos is keeping an eye on Elysia while he's away."
"Like I said little one, there has been some mighty strings pulled to bring you two together." The mighty Goddess smiled.
"Yeah, like, truly! This has taken ages, and all cos Warrior babe here wouldn't let go, and the Shy blonde bit wouldn't open her trap about something important for once!" Gabrielle opened her mouth to protest, but Xena had another burning question.
"My mother. She was there. Why was she there if we were in Illusia?"
"I'll answer that question for you Xena." The mighty Warrior Goddess stepped forward. "I brought her from Elysia, I asked Zeus and explained the situation, He agreed (and told me to tell you both: it's about time!) And said that as long as Cyrene acted as a guide, she was welcome to join you for a day."
"I spoke to your ma, warrior dudess. She's pleased as punch - she was only too happy to help, in fact she was more than happy. She was ecstatic to find out something was finally being done about the two of you." Xena turned to Gabrielle and beamed.
"So where does this leave us?" Gabrielle asked, looking to her Patron for answers. Aphrodite intervened,
"Together! That’s it where leaves you. You're both on this plain of existence you seem to like so much; you’re together after finally admitting your true feelings for one another."
"It leaves you in the best position. Your love will protect you both, and that can only get stronger." Added Athena. Striding towards Gabrielle, she held her hand. It was warm and welcoming. "I hope you do not mind me deceiving you both. You are my chosen and it was time you were happy. I know she will make you happy. I have seen it. It is fate.
"I am sorry to leave you know little one, but the Highest powers are calling, and we, like all, must obey. She stepped back towards her sister. "Come on then Miss Mischief, let's go, and leave these two to it." With this Aphrodite winked to Xena, looking towards Gabrielle, she said,
"Take care of that one, Amazon Babe - she's a softy really."
With that the light was gone, along with the two larger than life Goddesses.
***
"Xena, do you think they were right? Are we destined to be together? I mean, us meeting was..." Gabrielle was silenced by the Warrior Princess taking her hands in her own. She lowered her gaze towards her companion, and showed the same strength she had shown her.
She leaned towards Gabrielle, and closing her eyes, allowed their lips to meet.