Feb-23-2002 10:58 PM Message 128 of 523

Subject: Moving On (Dusty)

From: azzizs

Reply to: Josephine_Maia [ Message 103 ]

Dusty awoke to a glaring patch of sunlight, shining directly into her eyes. Cautiously opening one eye she was chagrined to find Thomas the Tabby staring down at her. Feline disdain evident in his eyes he took another swipe at her nose with his paw. "Ow!" Dusty exclaims.

Realizing that Thomas, and not the sun, is the cause of her early awakening, Dusty sighs.

"We had a deal..." Dusty admonishes the cat, "I keep you in tuna and you don't disturb my slumber!"

Before the cat can respond, Dusty hears the front door slam. In walks her flat mate Suzie, carrying a rolled up newspaper. "Dusty, Dusty, Dusty... What do you remember from last night?" Suzie asks.

Ignoring the cat, Dusty sits up in bed to talk to her roomate. The first thing she remembers is consuming large amounts of spirits. Spirits of the liquid kind. From the size of her headache, they were large spirits indeed. "A party at the Daybreak. Too much alcohol. Carol getting mad at me and leaving. Too much alcohol. That cute girl I danced with. Way too much alcohol..." She looks expectantly at Suzie, "Did I miss something?"

Suzie sits on the edge of the bed. "You have no clue, do you?"

Dusty notices the disarray her bed is in. Given how pissed her lover Carol was when she left the club, the only other option was... "Did I bring cute girl back here?"

Suzie nods.

"Uh, Suzie?" Dusty asks, "Where is cute girl?"

"I took her home about a hour ago," Suzie explains. "Home to daddy, Mayor Thompson."

Thomas swats at Dusty's arm. Without thinking, Dusty brushes him aside. "Mayor Thompson?"

"Oh and Johns wants you to pay your bar tab today."

"Mayor Thompson?" Dusty asks again.

Suzie whacks her roomate with the newspaper. "Yes, Mayor Thompson. The cute girl you conned and then seduced last night was none other than Francine, our o' so compassionate mayors *only* daughter.

Thomas lets out a meow that get Dusty's attention. Welcoming the distraction, Dusty asks, "What is it furball?"

The front door slams again with a force that shakes the apartment. "STARDUST VALENTINE!" a female voice booms.

Thomas leaps off the bed to hide under it. Suzie gives Dusty a *you're on your own* look and departs for her room. Dusty collapses back onto the bed wondering what else could go wrong before breakfast. Thomas growls from his spot under the bed.

Carol stands in the doorway. To say she looks pissed would be a understatement. "It is bad enough you forgot our anniversary. But to make a fool of yourself at the bar with that tart." She sees the disarray of the bed, her eyes widen. "You *brought* her here?"

Dusty knew better to answer. Carols capacity for jealousy was only surpassed by her ability to make Dusty feel weak in the knees and lose all thought of reason.

"I'll kill her. THEN I'll kill YOU!" She throws a package at Dusty. Dripping sarcasm she says "Happy Anniversary Lover!" Carol then storms out of the room. Dusty winces when she hears the door slam again.

Thomas tentatively peaks out from under the bed. Suzie sticks her head in, "Johns wants his money by tonight Dusty." She pauses, "But look on the bright side, you will probably be in jail by then! I give it about a hour before Mayor Thompson has the boys in blue at the door. Too bad your powers of persuasion don't work so well on boys..."

Shell shocked Dusty doesn't respond. Suzie adds, "Oh, and rent is due on Thursday. I have to go to work. You should try it sometime..." With that final dig, Suzie leaves.

Thomas leaps up onto the bed.

Dusty wearily looks at the feline. "I believe you had something to add?"

The cat meows his message and Dusty thinks she can hear a note of sympathy in the tabby's voice.

"You know, one of these days my cousin Aradia is going to have to enter this century and learn how to use a telephone!"

"Merowwwwww."

Dusty pets the cat, "Don't worry, you will always be my familar Mr. Tom!"

The feline responds with his deep baritone purr. Dusty continues to pet the cat, then stops. "Well, I guess we should get moving. Aradia wouldn't summon me for no reason and we have a stop to make on the way to collect my other half. My guess is Selah won't look up from her books long enough to take Aradia's message. And lord knows it isn't a party without my beloved sister!"

Thomas meows.

"Oh yes, and it would be bad to still be here when Mountain View's finest show up."

Dusty quickly dresses and throws some items in a bag. Thomas drags in his favorite toy and she adds that to the bag's inventory. She looks sadly at the box on the bed. In truth she did feel like a heal for forgetting her anniversary with Carol. She quickly congurs a illusion to say goodbye to her lover, grabs the box and adds it to the bag, picks up Thomas and leaves without looking back.

***

Feb-25-2002 7:35 PM Message 133 of 523

Subject: Elusive Goal {Selah}

From: Kamala

Reply to: Iethro_Tullius [ Message 24 ]

The gentle breeze blowing through the ash trees entered the small clearing as a curious observer, swirling silently around the two inhabitants seated before a large, stone slab, then continuing its journey through the woods. Selah absently tucked a stray lock of auburn hair behind one ear, oblivious to the wind, only the rhythmic words of Cedric penetrated her mind.

"Others before have come easy to you. Because of this your mind is not prepared. One must toil in order to obtain knowledge. Gained otherwise is a journey wasted."

Careful not to let her fingers touch the primeval scroll, Selah passed her hands over the parchment in a circular pattern. Tiny silver sparks rained down upon it. As each touched the surface, the paper fluttered slightly, yet its secrets it would not disclose.

"Patience. In time, it will reveal itself to you."

Taking a deep breath, Selah exhaled loudly, the only obvious sign of her frustration. Two months she had the scroll; two months it had eluded her. Her longest wait so far was twelve days and that was a particularly nasty one, blowing out the windows of her small cottage in a spectacular display to announce its arrival. A wizard's joke, which caused no end of trouble with her landlord and more than a few strange glances from Madge. Though Madge kept her suspicions to herself.

"Our time is complete." Cedric rose and placed his aging hands atop Selah's head. Yet even the tenderness of his touch did not ease her chagrin. Sensing this, he disappeared in a golden shimmer, leaving her to ruminate.

"Patience… Patience!" Selah yelled into the wind, her voice carrying through the leaves and brush. Stretching out her legs, she fell hard against the ground then jumped in surprise as a furry, black face appeared above her.

"Keir!" The panther lowered its large head, nuzzling Selah's neck in greeting.

Patience has never been one of your virtues.

"Don't I know," She grumbled, pushing herself to a standing position. "It's good to see you, my friend. Though I wager this isn't a purely social visit."

Aradia has summoned you.

"Star as well?" Keir inclined his sleek head and Selah sighed. Aradia would only call upon them if there was something nasty brewing. It was time to leave.

"Don't be a stranger."

I am always here for you.

Selah stroked his chin, Keir's deep purr reverberating along her arm, calming and comforting her. As she watched his regal form dissolve into the forest, her sanctuary phosphoresced than faded from view.

Few had ventured into the basement of the cottage situated next to the Summerville Public Library, a fact that worked in Selah's favor. She had turned it into her private study, full of ancient scrolls, obscure texts, and various mysterious items waiting to be explored. All were enchanted, to the casual observer they were old newspapers, water and fire damaged books, and bits of junk collected at flea markets.

Securing the thin-rimmed glasses on her nose, Selah rose from the sofa, a cascade of papers falling onto the floor. "Damn," she grumbled, as she knelt down to retrieve the mess.

"Slept here again, Selah?" Jumping at the sound of the voice, the pile Selah made scattered once again along the floor.

"Good morning Madge," A blush ran over Selah's cheeks as she responded to the petite, stooped figure at the top of the stairs. She could have sworn she locked the door last night.

"Ah, to be young again and able to sleep anywhere. If I'd slept on that old, creaky couch you'd have to knock out the walls and haul in a crane to lift me up." Madge chuckled to herself and Selah couldn't help but smile.

"Star will be here shortly." Selah's announcement effectively dampened Madge's good spirits. However, it was better to let her know beforehand than spring it on her at the last minute.

"So the black sheep is coming, eh?"

"Madge!"

"Two sisters so different I've never met. And twins at that!"

"Not identical," Selah interjected but Madge wasn't listening. Madge saw only the troublemaker, not the teenager trying to find herself and her niche. Ten years and Madge still hadn't forgotten. Though she evidently forgot she was talking to Selah because she turned and left, still mumbling about too much drinking and partying.

A flash of humor crossed Selah's face as she ran up the stairs and locked the door. Madge wasn't happy unless she had someone to complain about and she thrived on gossip, the one thing Selah's family supplied plenty of. Thoughts of Star would keep Madge occupied for a while. Hopefully long enough to allow her to finish deciphering the scroll before her sister arrived.

Shuffling impatiently through the parchments on the floor, Selah retrieved the stubborn scroll and placed it on the desk. Her lids became heavy as she chanted softly, the words a mumbled blur to any outsider. The air around sparkled, the tips of her fingers tingling with the growing energy. The seconds turned to minutes, the prism of color swelling beneath her.

A brief shiver rippled through Selah as she was wrapped in an invisible warmth. Always before she made it this far. Every scroll was unique, the opening of each an experience to be savored and enjoyed. Most were quick but this one's resistance always left her longing, unfilled, exhausted to the point that several days passed before she made another attempt. Determination, not patience, would win out.

The colors began to deliquesce and Selah cried out silently at their departure, reaching out into the darkness for what she did not know. Yet it was there, lulling her on like an addict to their waiting euphoria. She could sense it, almost feel its caress on her skin, then it was gone.

Lying her head on the desk, she struggled to still the dizzying currents racing through her. Finally, feeling empty and drained, she drifted into a restless sleep.

***

Feb-25-2002 8:43 PM Message 134 of 523

Subject: Homecoming {Dusty}

From: azzizs

Reply to: Kamala [ Message 133 ]

Dusty and Thomas arrive home during the early evening hours. Tired from the trip, Dusty is still a bit anxious about her return. It has been three years since she left home. She hadn't intended to stay away for so long, but she also hadn't felt compelled to return. When she left it was with a heavy heart and as many miles as she could put between her and her memories the better. But now she was regretting that she hadn't kept in contact with Selah. Was her sister angry with her? Dusty could handle anyone's disappointment, except Selah's. While they weren't identical, there was a strong bond between the two woman. So Dusty was approaching this homecoming with mixed emotions.

Thomas on the other hand is glad to finally be at thier destination. He is happily sniffing everything in his path to determine the lay of the land.

"Hey, no acting like I have starved your sorry ass this time!" Dusty says. "I have enough of a reputation here as it is. I don't need to be adding animal neglect..."

As she enters the front door she nearly bumps into Mrs. Madge Woodbury who is busily dusting. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't see you there." Dusty pauses. "Hello, Mrs. Woodbuy."

The housekeeper puts her hands on her hips. "Hello Stardust. Will you be staying long?"

Inwardly Dusty bristles at the full use of her name, but she tries not to let it show, "Just for a little while Mrs. Woodbury." Dusty marvels at how easy it is for this woman to make her feel like she is five years old again.

"Thomas, look at you, you poor thing! We will have to get you some of that turkey I have saved in the fridge."

"Mrs. Woodbury..." Dusty starts to say, when the older woman cuts her off.

"Selah's studying. She's been doing good with you gone, you know." Madge digs at Stardust in her own special way. "She's had time to grow and blossum without having to clean up your messes."

The words cut deep, but Dusty would be damned before she would give this old bat the satisfaction of hurting her. "I didn't come here to see her," Dusty easily lies. "I came here to see you!" She takes Mrs. Woodbury in her arms and gives her a sloppy kiss on the cheek.

Taken aback, Madge quickly exits. Thomas gives his owner a fleeting look and travels after the housekeeper for his reward.

"Traitor," Dusty mutters and decides to go thru her mail. The pile is quite large, in it's usual spot, but most of it is junk mail. One letter catches her eye and Dusty holds it in her hand. It has a familar feel, Dusty holds it up to her nose. She breathes in the fragrence and instantly recognizes it. Lost in her discovery she doesn't notice Selah leaning against the door jam thoughtfully watching her.

***

Feb-25-2002 11:34 PM Message 135 of 523

Subject: Fraternal Bonds {Selah & Dusty}

From: Kamala

Reply to: azzizs [ Message 134 ]

Selah quietly studied her sister, a low sigh escaping from her lips. She looked so tired, not just physically but emotionally. The three years since Jenny's death had not been easy ones, for either of them. Three years Star had been gone with no word. If Thomas had not kept Selah informed of her sisters whereabouts on a regular basis she would have tracked her down and dragged her home kicking and screaming if necessary. Yet Selah had known, and left Star alone.

It hurt that only a message from Aradia would bring her around. How many nights had Selah sat alone, trying desperately to hold back her tears? It was those evenings when Thomas came. His connection to Star was strong, and as such with Selah as well.

As if on cue the object of Selah's thoughts appeared in the doorframe, looking quite sated and purring loudly. "Hello Thomas."

So absorbed in the discovery of the letter and memories Dusty was truly startled. "Selah! How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough. You're losing your touch." Selah smiled as she spoke then quickly spanned the distance between them, enveloping her sister in a long hug.

Stardust returned the hug tightly. It had taken three years away to realize how much she missed her sister. Dusty for the first time understood that in addition to running away from herself that she had run away from Selah as well.

As the two embrace she whispered, "I'm sorry." Then adding, "I've missed you."

"I've missed you so much," Selah began then pulled away slightly, staring long and hard into Star's eyes. "But don't think you're gonna get off easy, Miss Stardust Harley Valentine. It will require extensive groveling, some banana pancakes, and you have to be nice to Madge."

"Nice to Madge," Dusty's cheeks puckered as if she had just eaten a dozen lemons. "Do I hafta?"

"Well…"

"I can grovel..." Dusty added quickly, "but I was informed quite explicitly that you thrived in my absence and the best thing to happen to you was your low life sister leaving town..."

"Oh Star, I'm sorry. She's still upset over the apple pie incident. And I know that was ten years ago, but she's old and has little to keep her going these days. She won't be around much longer. Please, for me, try and be patient with her."

"For you Lizzie, anything. I can even be nice to Madge, " Stardust looked in her sister's eyes, a pained smile marring her features. "But...well...we met up earlier tonight. My guess is she will give me a clear path for a day or two..." She finished trying hard to hide a mischievous grin.

"In that case it shouldn't be too difficult. We'll be gone by then." A heavy silence fell between them. Thomas, sensing their unease, joined the sisters, rubbing his face along their legs in quiet support. "Do you have any idea why Aradia has summoned us?"

"No, I don't." Dusty paused. "It's not like I had anything holding me in Mountain View. Lizzie, I'm sorry I didn't come back sooner or call. I just..."

"You don't need to explain Star. We all deal differently with pain. You needed, no had to leave. I understand, more then you probably think."

Stardust brushed back a tear and hugged her sister again. "I may forget to tell you sometimes, but I love you Selah Elizabeth Valentine. I'm... I'm glad to be home." Letting her sister go she added, "So is only the cat allowed to be fed in this house or could I get something to eat? Without Madge poisoning it beforehand?" Selah's laughter echoed through the hall as Star winked at her.

"Come on." Selah wrapped her arm around Star's waist and led her towards the kitchen. "I think I can rustle something up for you."

***

Feb-28-2002 10:38 PM Message 141 of 523

Subject: Restless Night {Dusty}

From: azzizs

Reply to: Kamala [ Message 135 ]

Dusty awakes with a start! "JENNY!" She sits upright in bed and her breathing comes in great gulps as she takes in her surroundings. "Jenny..." she says softly.

She listens for sounds of others stirring, but is relieved to only hear Thomas stir as he rises to nuzzle her. She absently pets the feline for a few moments and then rises to go to the kitchen for something to drink. Finding nothing strong enough to lull her back to sleep she settles for a glass of water. That old biddy probably hid all of the booze before I arrived. she thinks to herself.

Sighing she returns to her room and dresses. Feeling too restless to go back to sleep she decides to take a walk. She is halfway there, before she realizes her path takes her directly to the graveyard. But in reality, there was really no place else for her to go.

As she stands over the grave of her lover, her partner, her friend...all of the hurt, anger and helplessness return and Stardust cannot deny her tears. She realizes that Thomas has followed her to the gravesite. "Return to the house." she tells her familar. Thomas stands his ground. "Thomas! Return to the house!"

Deciding to follow her instructions the tabby relucktantly leaves.

Returning her attention to the gravesite Dusty speaks, "I'm sorry...I...I miss you." She sits in silence, her anger at what happened welling up inside her. "It's not fair!" she calls out. She tries to focus the power within her to breathe life back into the one she loved. Energy crackles around her in a spectacular light show. But in the end it is only a light show and she collapses on the gravesite. "I'm sorry." she whispers to ears that can no longer hear her. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." she chants as exhaustion overcomes her.

She is still half awake when she feels a blanket covering her. "Come child...It is too cold for you to stay out here. My niece would not want you to catch your death out here and neither would I."

"Mrs. Woodbury?" a confused Stardust responds.

"I was never thrilled with your relationship with my niece Stardust. But she is gone and now you have to live on. It is time to put her to rest child." The old woman says kindly.

"It's my fault!" Dusty blurts out. Then softer, "It's all my fault."

Madge sits down next to Stardust, "How is your fault? She was killed in a random act of violence. How could you possibly be responsible?"

"She came back from Europe early because of me." Stardust replies miserably. "And if I hadn't finished off the milk she wouldn't have gone to the mini-mart."

Mrs. Woodbury takes Dusty's hand in her own and looks Dusty in the eyes, "I advised her to return Star. You both were miserable without each other. And I loved my Jenny...and I love you. You were both like children to me. I never had my own. So you and your sister are my family now. It would distress your sister a great deal not to find you there in the morning. Will you return home with me?"

Numbly Star nods. Unable to process the conflicting emotions, she stands as the housekeeper wraps the blanket tighter around her, and leads her home.

Thomas is waiting on the porch and follows them inside. Mrs. Woodbury leads Star to the bed and helps her change. Star starts to protest when Madge says, "Oh, hush. I have put you to bed plenty of times and have seen everything you have more times than I can count." Stardust stops her resistance. In a odd way the maternal attention is comforting. "I'll stay with you until you fall back asleep. I'm old. So don't keep me up all night." The housekeeper interjects with a hint of humor. Thomas takes his place at the foot of the bed and curls into a ball.

The next morning Stardust awakes to wonderful smells wafting from the kitchen. Coffee, bacon, banana pancakes... She rises sleepily, throws on her robe and heads to the kitchen.

***

Mar-10-2002 12:35 AM Message 154 of 523

Subject: Disturbing Dreams {Selah}

From: Kamala

Reply to: azzizs [ Message 141 ]

No!!! Pain… intense pain… screams… acrid smoke… No!!!…Don't leave… Don't take me… torment… death… tears… I'm still here. You're gone.

Dark… cold…where am I? Come. Where are you? I can't see. Open your heart… Warm… soothing… unbearable tenderness…whispers. Touch me. Persuasion… embrace… passion… hunger… spiraling ecstasy. Open for me. Quivering…

Selah shot out of her bed, struggling against the mix of bedding entangled around her shaking body. Her lips still burned from his searing kisses and she slowly raised her fingers to trace their raw outline. It was so real, his hands exploring the hollows of her back, her complete surrender to his masterful seduction.

Then she smelled it; the pungent scent of wood and recently burned flesh. It was on her skin, in her hair. It surrounded her, suffocating in its intensity. She could still hear their screams, their cries for help, pleading for release from the constant pain and suffering.

Running for the bathroom, she stripped out of her night shirt before reaching the door. A raw and primitive grief overwhelmed her and she labored to turn on the shower, her only escape from the redolence of death.

*****

"You're up early." Madge's cheerful voice grated on Selah as she entered the kitchen. "I didn't expect to see you down here yet. That was a pretty late shower."

Selah turned from her position in front of the stove, handing Madge a piece of bacon. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

"I was already awake," Madge said brushing off the apology. "Bad dreams?"

"Um, disturbing dreams." Selah had been up for several hours, the horrible scenes of her nightmare finally subsiding to be replaced in her mind by the more sensuous aspect of it. Neither of which made sense to her.

Peering around Selah's shoulder, Madge looked long into her eyes. "Uh huh."

"What?"

"Flushed cheeks," Madge began, giving her a quick pinch.

"It's warm in here," Selah swatted at Madge's hand like a pesky fly.

"Averted gaze…"

Selah positioned herself over the stove, blocking Madge's view. "I'll burn the pancakes if I don't watch them."

"Anyone I know, Selah?"

His name lingered around the edges of her conscience. Just beyond her fingertips, but it might as well have been across the ocean, for she could not cross the distance to find it.

"Who was the man in your dreams?" Madge was more insistent, poking Selah in the side as she stole a piece of bacon.

Selah feigned a slap on Madge's wrist, but not before the booty was safely installed in her mouth. "It was just a dream."

"Jake?"

"Jake?" A soft gasp escaped Selah before she started laughing. "The delivery guy? I think not."

"He is cute…"

"Do you want your eggs scrambled or over easy?" What Selah didn't need was Mrs. Woodbury trying to arrange her love life… again.

"And single…"

"Scrambled it is." Why wasn't she able to hide her feelings from Madge?

"Cullen has been gone almost five months. It's time to move on Selah."

Oh yes, here it was again. 'Get on with your life, Selah.' or 'Cullen is not worth the effort of your tears, Selah.' Selah would decide what was or was not worth her effort and anyone Madge recommended was definitely a 'was not'. "With Jake?"

"Yes, or no. I just want to see you happy." Madge replied, wrapping her arms around Selah

"I know, I know," Selah repeated, returning the hug. "You have to admit your track record at matchmaking is not impressive. Let's see… Cullen, of course, then Mark, and let's not forget the plumber."

"He was nice," Madge added firmly. "Besides, the fourth time's a charm."

"No thank you. I'm quite content to be single for a bit longer." Luckily for Selah, Star chose that moment to enter the kitchen, her presence a welcome to relief from Madge's scheming. "Morning, sleep good?"

***

Mar-10-2002 1:20 AM Message 155 of 523

Subject: Breakfast Anyone? {Dusty & Selah}

From: Kamala

Reply to: Kamala [ Message 154 ]

Dusty enters the kitchen still tired from last evening's events and is immediately greeted by her sister, "Morning, sleep good?"

She casts a quick glace at Mrs. Woodbury and responds ducking her sister's glance. "Yeah sure, how about you?" She asks as she moves to get herself some much needed coffee.

"It was a restless night... strange dreams."

"Uh-huh," Madge inserts as she eyes Selah over the top of the newspaper.

Selah turns hastily, spatula in hand, bits of scrambled egg flying from the tip. "Madge, maybe you should take up a different profession, psychic dream interpreter, 976-MADGE."

Quickly changing the subject, Stardust questions, "I thought I was supposed to make the banana pancakes today?" She takes a seat at the table. "Something about groveling?" she teases.

Selah laughs gently as she places a large plate piled high with banana pancakes, scrambled eggs, bacon, and cinnamon toast in front of Star. "You have to be quicker than that around here, Star."

"You always were a better cook than me..." Stardust mutters as she digs into the pile of food. She feels the presence of a very spoiled feline below the table. "None of this for you, my furry friend. But I bet if you are nice to the cook she will give you some milk."

Mrs. Woodbury helps herself to some toast and rises to pour Thomas some Milk from the fridge. "Come Thomas, we'll fix you up." Thomas hurries to her side as she places the bowl on the floor. She also takes the time to get some orange juice from the fridge, she pours three glasses and returns to the table. She places one glass in the place where Selah will sit and another in front of Dusty and the last at her space. She then sits down to eat her toast.

Stardust pauses, stuffing banana pancake into her mouth, she wrinkles her nose at the orange juice, "Don't suppose you have any Vodka to go in that?"

At Mrs. Woodbury's glance Stardust changes the subject, "I'm sorry about your apple pie Mrs. Woodbury!" she blurts out.

Madge laughs, "Oh child, that was years ago, you have far outdone yourself since that time."

"Oh please, Madge. Every time you bake a pie you're grumbling about the one that got away," Selah interjects in a somewhat joking manner.

"Miss Selah, even though you are in a surly mood this morning, no doubt due to lack of sex, you will not be able to ruin my good mood at having both my girls sitting around the breakfast table."

Selah's mouth drops opens, her bite of pancake, dripping with syrup, forgotten on her half raised fork.

"Selah, it's not proper to eat with your mouth open," Madge admonishes.

Dusty for her part, has to muster all her concentration not to spit out her wretched orange juice thru her nose. Coughing she regains her composure, "Uhm, please pass the scrambled eggs," she asks Selah sweetly, making sure to make eye contact this time. The laughter in her eyes is evident. "Thanks for the attempt at a rescue," she whispers to her sister.

"And your attempt was any better?" Selah whispers back, amusement flickering in her eyes.

"At least I know how to get laid and don't eat food with my mouth open," Stardust sticks out her tongue at her sister.

"Hey, just because I've chosen to delve into the wonderful depths of the toy chest for the last four months doesn't mean I don't know how to get laid. At least I don’t have to coach the..."

"Enough!" Madge interrupts abruptly, clearly flustered about the tone the conversation has taken. "I don't need to hear about those things."

"What things Madge?" Selah asks innocently, winking at Star.

"You know perfectly well what I am referring to." The older woman responds.

"Ah, come on Madge, say it," Selah pauses briefly, leaning across the table. "Di..il..do..." Selah pronounces slowly as stains of scarlet appear on Madge's cheeks.

Having finished her breakfast, Stardust leans back in her chair. "Oh, my! I don't think I have seen that before..." She winks at her sister. She whispers, "OK, you do get extra points for making her blush..."

Stardust then stands up and says, "Well, I should probably finish going thru my mail and get my stuff together..."

"Yeah, me too," Selah begins, "We have a long trip..."

"What? Where are you two going? Stardust, you just got here. You can't leave yet."

Dusty slowly starts backing towards the door, leaving Selah stammering, "Well...Aradia has asked us to...visit for a while..."

"And you didn't feel it was necessary to tell me about this! How long have you known?" Madge's angry voice lashes at Selah, though her eyes are directed at Dusty.

"Mrs. Woodbury...Madge..." Dusty looks distraught. "I just found out yesterday, I just stopped by here so Selah wouldn't have to go alone...I didn't mean to..." The young woman looks unsure of what to do or say next, her feelings regarding Mrs. Madge Woodbury had grown more complex over the 18 hours she had been home. "I...I'm sorry...I...we have to go..." the words stumble out and she leaves the room.

"Have you known since yesterday as well?" Madge grits her teeth, turning to Selah.

"Yes."

"Well," Madge hesitates, conflicting emotions evident on her face. "I see." Her voice is low and Selah catches the briefest glance of despair before Mrs. Woodbury lowers her head and begins to clear the table.

Selah takes a step towards her, feeling guilty and selfish for not mentioning the trip beforehand. She just hadn't wanted to deal with the inevitable questions it would have produced. "Madge..."

"Move along. You need to finish your packing." At the coldness in Madge's voice, Selah sighs and joins Star.

***

Mar-10-2002 3:06 AM Message 156 of 523

Subject: Mail Call {Dusty & Selah}

From: azzizs

Reply to: Kamala [ Message 155 ]

Dusty enters the dining room to finish sorting her mail. She throws the junk mail away without reading it. Next she puts aside the cards from well wishers. They have kept for three years, they will keep for a bit longer. Near the bottom of the pile she finds a telegram from her parents. She stands and stares at it for a moment. Thomas brushes against her leg and meows.

"Easy for you to say..." Dusty says to the cat. "Eat, sleep, sun...yeah, you have it rough."

Stardust takes the telegram and places it with the unopened letter from last night. She takes the remaining mail and dumps it in a bag. She then picks up the telegram again.

Selah comes up behind Stardust and hugs her, "That came a few days after you left."

Dusty tentatively opens it.

Our dearest Star,

Your father and I wish we could be there with you in your time of pain. Jenny was a lovely girl and will be missed by us all. You know we wish we could return home to be with you, but they need us here and we can't get away. We'll see you soon, Stardust, maybe you can come here and visit...

Love,

Emily and Jacob

Anger builds up in Stardust and she crumples the telegram and throws it as hard as she can. Selah takes a step back as Dusty vents her anger. "THEY need you! Oh, by all means, stay where ever the hell you are because THEY need you! After all anyone is more important than ME, your own child!"

"Star..."

"I AM their child! I'm not some waif they picked up on the street. Why do I always feel that way Lizzie? They would have..." she breaks off her sentance realizing the harm it would do. She hopes that her sister can't read her thoughts, but the hurt in Selah's eyes is a familar one. One that has been haunting the twins since they were born.

Stardust Harely Valentine arrived in the world, kicking and screaming. Her parents rejoiced at having a healthy baby girl. After a pause in the birthing process Jacob and Emily were surprised to find that they were bringing another child into the world. Selah Elizabeth Valentine was in no hurry to leave the comfort and security of the womb it seemed. But when Selah emerged there was no kicking and screaming. Doctors rushed the baby away and for a short while the outcome was uncertain. The Valentines spent all their time hovering over their second child and rejoiced when she got a clean bill of health. Selah was always a special child in their eyes. A miracle! They hadn't been expecting twins and Selah's birth had been far from easy.

Stardust for her part, only knew that when it came to her, her mother had been absent. A bond that most children experience wasn't there. As a young child she strived to establish to please her parents. And while they congradulated and celebrated her achievements, there was always room for improvement. Goals she had not achieved. So as time dragged on, she stopped trying. Not completely, but in little ways. She no longer strove for excellance, she took the easy paths whenever possible. She adopted a attitude of not caring. But in truth that couldn't have been farther from the truth. It was easier to delude herself into thinking she didn't care, but it didn't really block the hurt. It didn't stop the desire to fit in. The only one who had ever really understood Stardust was Selah. Thier bond was real and true. And one that Stardust Harley Valentine cherishes.

"What don't I matter to them?" Dusty asks plaintively.

Selah, having no words for her sister simply wraps her arms around her twin.

After a time they break apart. Selah sees the other letter in Dusty's hand. Softly she asks, "Are you going to read that one? I would have sent it to you, but..."

"I'm sorry, Lizzie. I should have contacted you. I shouldn't have..."

"Shhhh, she loved you very much Star. I love you too. You do know that?" Selah asks.

Stardust nods her head. "She sent this before she left Europe." Dusty begins. With shaking hands she carefully opens the envelope. Jenny's favorite perfume escapes the envelope and fills Stardust's senses, even after all this time.

Starlight, Starbright, first Star I see tonight...

My dearest Star,

I miss you so much! Europe seems to lose it's luster without someone special to share it with. The people here are nice and my classmates invite me to things, but they can tell I am miserable without you. Each night I sit at my window and look up into the stars and make my wish. I wish I may, I wish I might...and guess what!!! Aunt Madge called tonight. I'll probably be home before you get this my love. I can't wait to see you, touch you, hold you and...you will just have to wait! *grin* I hope you don't have any plans for a few days... Don't tell my aunt, but I think she has a soft spot for you that she refuses to show. She said she is going to drag you to the airport with her to meet my plane. Something about your pitiful whining...*laugh* If your whining is half as pitiful as mine you must have driven my poor Aunt Madge to distraction! I can't wait to see you!!

All my love,

Jenny

"I lied about last night, Selah." Star says softly. "I couldn't sleep, so I went to see her. I tried to..." Dusty starts to reveal her magical attempts the night before and stops herself. She chooses her words carefully, "I...I wanted to bring her back..." Tears stream down Stardust's face, "I miss her Lizzie. I still miss her..."

***

Mar-10-2002 5:24 PM Message 157 of 523

Subject: Saying Goodbye {Dusty, Madge, Selah}

From: azzizs

Reply to: azzizs [ Message 156 ]

Stardust finishes her packing by throwing the unopened package Carol gave her in her duffle bag. She then takes her bag out the car, as she passes the kitchen she sees Mrs. Woodbury sitting at the table alone, drinking a cup of coffee.

Throwning her bag in the car she notices that Selah looks miserable. Her sister doesn't handle confrontation well, Star remembers, but then again, neither does she. She gives her sister a hug. "I'm going to go back inside for a minute."

Selah nods.

Re-entering the house, Dusty stands in the kitchen doorway a few moments before she speaks. "Mrs. Woodbuy...Madge...I know you are mad at me and you have every right to be. I...I'm sorry I hurt you. I didn't mean to."

The older woman motions for Stardust to sit next to her. So Star takes a seat and takes one of Madge's hands in her own. "I didn't come home to see you...But I'm glad I did..." Stardust begins. "I think I have taken you for granted all these years and I'm sorry. I always thought I disappointed you and...and that you didn't like me. I learned this trip that I was wrong. Thank...Thank you for last night. I...I...love you and Jenny loved you. Thank you for letting her come home." She leans over and gives the woman a awkward hug.

Mrs. Woodbury pulls Stardust deeper into the hug. "I really had no choice but to let her come home. She loved you very much Star. She would want you to be happy. I wish you would stay longer, there is so much..."

"Hey, I'm sure Aradia will only need us for a few days, then we will be back and I will stay for a long time." Dusty smiles.

Madge nods, not really believing the statement. "Be good to your sister, in spite of your differences she adores you. I want you both to come back safe, Stardust."

Solemnly Star nods, "I promise we will Mrs. Woodbuy."

"You two are all I have now, Star." Madge states.

Having delved too deeply into emotions that are hard for her, Dusty seeks to change the subject however she can and remembers Jenny's letter. Taking the letter from her pocket, she hands it to Mrs. Woodbury to read. "I...I just opened this today. I thought you might like to read it. She sent it to me after she talked to you..."

Madge reads the letter and does not hide the tears it produces. Stardust feels compelled to give her another awkward hug. They hug for a few minutes.

"Stardust, I'm sorry your parents didn't come home for Jenny's funeral. I know that is one of the reasons that you left town. I don't know that I will ever forgive them for not returning myself." There is a hint of anger in Mrs. Woodbury's voice.

Star tries to shrug it off like it is not important, but fails. "I didn't really expect them. It is not like they really ever paid attention to me before. It was probably for the best. At least they come and visit Selah."

Mrs. Woodbury looks surprised, "They haven't been home since the last time you saw them. Did Selah not tell you? Each year they have sent you both checks to assuage their feelings of guilt. My poor troubled Star. You always were too hard on yourself. I love you child, I always have."

The two hug again. Mrs. Woodbury breaks the hug and both see Selah in the doorway. So they move the hug to include her. After all three hug for a few moments, Mrs. Woodbury again breaks the hug, becoming very business like. "Well, you girls should get going, I don't want you to be driving after dark!" She goes to the fridge and takes out two packages. "I hope you will indulge a old woman, I packed you both some snacks to take on the trip." She hands them both a package and ushers them out to the car, "Selah, I have told your sister to take care of you and I want you to take care of her as well. I want you both to return home safe and soon."

***

Mar-10-2002 9:11 PM Message 159 of 523

Subject: Road Trip, part I {Dusty & Selah}

From: Kamala

Reply to: azzizs [ Message 157 ]

As they went out to the car, Dusty tossed her car keys to Selah, "Can you take the first shift driving? I am wiped..."

"Sure thing." Selah's eyes lit up as she caught the keys to the aquamarine Camaro. She had never been able to justify purchasing a sports car, let alone a convertible when her white Neon got the job done and better gas mileage.

She glanced upwards, the clear blue sky and warm breeze promising an enjoyable ride. "Can we put the top down?"

Star chuckled at her sister's excitement as she climbed in, settling the various wares from Mrs. Woodbury into the backseat. "No sneaking food," She ordered Thomas as he curled up on the floor behind the passenger seat, his brows drawn together in an affronted frown.

"Where to first?" Selah asked, the hum of the opening hood bringing a huge grin to her face.

"Well, we have to stop by the bank for money. Since we are going to the boonies, I think a trip to the liquor store is in order. I love Aradia, but this witch stuff makes me want to drink!" She grinned at her sister, "And we should stop by Circle K for some gas and damn, I could use a Pepsi!"

An hour and half later, the backseat crammed full of tasty treats and various liquids, the sisters finally turned onto the highway and left Springfield behind.

"Do you think you got enough?" Selah questioned as a Whopper wrapper danced in front of her then sailed out of the car before she could catch it.

"Well...let's see...chips, soda, candy, soda, some of that weird stuff you wanted, soda..." Star ticks off the items, "Uh, yeah. Oh! And we have that healthy stuff like carrots and crap that Mrs. Woodbury packed for us." She grinned at her sister. "We haven't gone on a road trip in awhile!"

Dusty leans her seat back and closes her eyes. "Ah, this is the life."

"Pure freedom," Selah added as she rumbled through the collection of CDs in the center console. "Oh, now this one brings back some memories."

Sittin' in the morning sun,

I`ll be sittin' when the evening come,

Watching the ships roll in,

And I'll watch 'em roll away again, yeah,

I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay,

Watching the tide roll away, ouh,

I'm just sittin' on the dock of the bay,

Wasting time.

As Selah continued to sing, she studied Star's face. The beginning of a smile tipped the corners of Star's mouth and Selah wondered how long it had been since she had a true reason to smile.

"What have you been up to lately?" Selah asked between versus. "Thomas does give me updates, but they are sketchy at best."

"Mostly bumming around," Stardust responded laconically. "Nothing really to write home about," She started then winced at her choice of words. "I traveled around for a bit, some fortune telling here, some parlor games there. Being able to create illusions came in handy for earning a quick buck. Settled in Mountain View for a time. Had a roommate, a regular place to hang, that kind of stuff..."

Deliberately omitting her relationships, Star took a sip of her soda and changed the subject to her sister, "How about you? Keir never liked me so keeping tabs on you, young lady, wasn't as easy."

A flash of amusement crossed Selah's face at the mention of Keir. "Yeah, he can be a bit ornery at times. About two years ago he left me because he didn't agree with the amount of time I was spending with my scrolls. He didn't let me off as easily as I let you off though. I had to grovel a full three months before he'd talk to me again." Her smile deepened into laughter before she continued. "Not a whole lot has changed since you left. Still working at the library, still working with scrolls, only the bedmates have changed."

Star raised her eyebrow, "How many bedmates have there been since I have been gone? And here I thought you'd spent this entire time with your nose firmly stuck between your books and scrolls."

"Well, yeah, I have. That's the reason for no lasting relationships," Selah muttered. "I definitely do not have your ability to build a relationship and keep it."

Stardust winced, "Well, that was a one time deal I think. Truth is that the relationships I have had since have been rather shallow. I've been using people Lizzie, and I have gotten good at it. So good sometimes I forget I am doing it," Her voice taking on a far away quality.

"But," Selah hesitated, "I don't understand, Star. Well, I mean I do understand, but are you sure you're not reading it wrong. Someone has to want to be used to actually be used. I think you're being too hard on yourself."

"You've lived too long with Madge, you both are starting to sound alike." Dusty teased her sister.

"Oh!" Selah raised her elbow, jabbing her sister in the arm. "I do NOT sound like Madge…Do I?"

"Only around the edges," Stardust laughed before taking a more somber tone, "Selah, why didn't you tell me that Jacob and Emily haven't been home since I have been gone? That's a record, even for them. I'm sorry sis."

"Exactly when was I supposed to tell you? When you came home for Christmas or when you called to wish me a happy birthday?" Selah knew her tone was curt, but the growing frustration over the three years they had been separated would not be held back. "You chose to push me out of your life. I didn't like it, but I accepted it."

Selah swerved quickly to pass the car that suddenly appeared in front of her, the near miss bringing her emotions back down a level. "Besides, it's old news. You're more like them than you think."

"I didn't know..." Dusty started to say in her defense then added quietly, "I deserved that."

***

Mar-11-2002 12:21 AM Message 160 of 523

Subject: Road Trip, part II {Selah & Dusty }

From: azzizs

Reply to: Kamala [ Message 159 ]

They drive for a few hours without speaking, the years apart finally driving a rift between them. A familar tune fills the speakers and Dusty sings along softly, staring out at the trees.

When this old world starts getting me down

And people are just too much for me to take

I climb right up to the top of the stairs

And all my cares just drift right into space

On the roof's the only place I know

Where you just have to wish to make it so

Up on the roof

When I get home feeling tired and beat

I go up where the air is fresh and sweet

I get away from that hustling crowd

And all that ratrace noise down in the street

At night the stars put on a show for free

And darling you can share it all with me

I keep tellin' you that right smack dab in the middle of town

I found a paradise that's trouble-proof

And if this old world starts getting you down

There's room enough for two up on the roof

Up on the roof

"I'm sorry I hurt you Selah. You don't know how much I wish I could take these three years back. I ran away from everything and everyone. I think I'm still running away. I...I don't know how to explain it. You are a part of me Selah, without you around something was missing. But when Jenny died, it...it left this big hole in me. And I couldn't stay. I've spent the last three years trying to fill the hole with anything. Even misery. And I couldn't take you with me on that. I couldn't...Don't be mad at me Lizzie, I'm sorry I left, but there's room enough for two up on the roof. I won't disappear again."

Though she struggles against it, a single tear rolls down Selah's cheek. She hastily brushes it away as she pulls off the road.

"Star… I was hurt by so many things. You leaving. Mom and Dad leaving. Jenny's death." Selah gulps hard, her tears falling more quickly. "I shouldn't…. I shouldn't have said those things. You were hurt as much, if not more, than I was. There has been so much pain… and… I don't want this to continue. It can't continue… I love you Stardust," Selah reaches out, Star meeting her halfway.

Stardust's tears match her sisters, "I love you Selah. More than I can really say."

After a period of time passes, the twins regain their composure. "Want me to take over driving?" Dusty asks.

"Yeah," Selah replies wiping away the last of the tears. "But since we're already stopped, I say we eat. I'm starving."

"Mrs. Woodbury packed us some turkey sandwiches. I'll get them out of the back. What do you want to drink?" Dusty asks.

"I'll have the grape soda, oh and the salt and vinegar chips and... give me some of those Whoppers as well." Thomas chooses that moment to jump on Selah's lap, purring loud enough to be heard miles away. "And Thomas would like some turkey and milk."

"Ok, but you start eating kibble again when we get there again, ya furball." Stardust grabs a Turkey Sandwich, Diet Pepsi, and corn chips for herself. "Here's your food Selah."

After the trio finishes eating, Selah and Star swap seats. Thomas goes back to his napping spot. With Stardust at the wheel, they continue on thier trip.

About a hours later, they enter a woodsy area that Aradia had told them about. They find a spot to hide the car among the woods and set off for the area where the coven is gathering.

"Do you think my car will be safe here?" Dusty asks as her brow furrows in concern.

Selah laughs, "Who out here are you worried about? That squirrel over there?"

"Ok, ok..." Dusty reaches into the car and grabs Selah's bag and hands it to her. Then she takes out her own, locks up the car. "Thomas, get your butt back here! Don't you know that the squirrels out here are bigger than you? And the blackbirds, hell, they can probably carry your scrawny ass off."

Selah laughs at the expression on Thomas's face, she hooks her arm in her twins and says, "Lead on McDuff!"

"You sure my car will be ok?" Dusty asks.

Selah playfully hits her sister, "Yes, the car will be fine!"

Dusty pulls her attention away from her beloved car, "I think I see a path over here. Stay close Thomas. You never know what lurks in these woods..."

Shortly they reach a large wooden door set into a mountain, "Wow! I, uh...guess we're here." Dusty announces as she uses the knocker to announce thier arrival.

They are all relieved when cousin Aradia opens the door and ushers them inside. "It is good to see you cousin." Selah says.

"Thomas, stay close even in the house." Stardust says to her familar. Without using words she lets him know that she doesn't want to see him a Vampire snack.

Once inside the twins take turns giving thier cousin a hug. Selah asks, "Is there a place we can put our things before you fill us in?"

***