dec1
ths is a nifty device not nearly perfect but  isuppose it is getting there maybe i should have that shower now, i can;t imaginewhy you would to all of this effort to make such a nifty keyboard if you weren;t going to then use it to write and write and wite but then i haven't looked at anything about the palm pilot in fact really i have just invested a lot of fath in mitch and his seemng appreciation of his thining of names for the partnership and combining the inner and the outer above and below the sounds of the ground and the lights in the sky sounds like a job for the internet to look up al this stuff and i stazrted thinking that it is all about 

Monday 5th ah yes and once again this is what the humble notepad is for, always start at the humble notepad and go from there, and keep some kind of log, i wonder when the palmy will run out of memory or whether we can upgrade it with memory, and perhaps it would just be best not to try to keep everything on it anyway, i want to go to Lillian Rock for the new year period , hmm and once again Aurora had a tantrum, and "i'm never going to speak to the quakers again"

i've started taking a lot of notes down about making a new film called Antartic Medicine or rather it is a new incarnation and somewhere all of those notes are on my palm and if i have to import all of them from the thoughtmanager into the memo pad to get them off i will be very cross
maybe that's what the beaming thing does but i haven't sorted that out yet
oh but yay hey that is really annoying

so now it is time to weed, weed the palm top cause this all just looks like it is a bit too complicated already and maybe it isn't really designed to be an electronic book as such as much as i would like it to be i would like it to contain my novel so i could read it on the train, and the business plan, i wonder how big a memo can be, i've already found that out, it is in where i've got the health check list

oh aye and i don't really know how i managed that, but all the note taking thinging i was doing about nundah is gone, ah and there is the reason: not really knowing how the technology works, best to become more fluid? with it.  competent? i am hungry, it is 12pm and hunger kicks in

Lawnton
there is a camp ground just north of lawnton. I saw a tent set up in it i want to go there

so it is sort of good but maybe there is definately limits to the functionality of Palmy now i feel like i want a nap, and it is pretty warm in here even with a fan on

13th
another way of looking at it, is, if i can't watch 9 minutes of it, then i won't be about to watch two hours of it.  by it i mean my own animation on television, it gets to be really degraded by the time it makes it up to hi res
and i have seen some of it on tv before, and it wasn't very good, so, we'll see what we shall see, maybe i could squeeze that shower in or a quick potter in my room

Tuesday 20th
back in Morayfield the Field of Moray Eels and i feel like a blob. i vascillate between an angry blob and a bored stuffed up blob, and then i go to being an irritated blob on the verge of a crying fit, maybe these are all good things in there own way. the anger reminds me of when i was plotting revenge on Jason in the grape vines of Buronga, the only person that got hurt in all that me, and i look about my room. and there are lots of things that i want to move out of the room or move to another place in the room like just over there away from the window and then i can sit under the window like i am almost doing now. i chucked the big cardboard box that i wanted to do the black light photography in, but i guess i soon as i started putting stuff <props> in it, i realised that it was going to be too hard to get *me* in there as well, i do like to  lean up against the wall like i am doing now, and i can put the cushions here that i haven't yet, and maybe where the drawers are now, i can put the cushions and sit there too except the computer can't really go too far away from the power point

21st Solstice so while we are going through everything one at a time, i have just been looking at the meeting list of al-anon and aa and it makes me cross that there are not more to choose from, makes me cross that i have to go so far to get to a meeting, cross that it is so hard to get to them from here, and then i get discouraged cause i don't know what is going to be best for me, routines help, i know that they work to routinely think that my HP is looking after me, and you will help me to work out what is the best thing for me to do, and maybe there isn't a "best" routine for every permutation and combination has advantages and disadvantages, so far the simplest thing to do would be to go to Morningside tomorrow, and to lodge a form in Fort.Valley and to go to the AA meeting in Biala, there is a women's meeting at biala, and there is an aa meeting at redcliffe in the daytime, and then to go shopping tonight at morayfield, sometimes i find myself thinking what i am doing out here? and the whole land thing is a bit of a disappointment because we haven't put anything in the ground, and we can't seem to agree about doing anything, well, seems like, i think we could agree on keeping that patch of dug ground free of weeds.  right now, it is full of weeds. and i think i would like to go to the aa meeting in landsborough, it is at 12:30pm and i suppose that is another, i do know which meetings "seem" like they would be good to go to them, but i am already afraid that i just won't go there, i suppose something about going to Brackenridge, it would make it easier to get out there if i go out there before hand, at least to Bald Hills there is the train station there, and then getting a bike would make it easier to get around, and then there is the meeting at Kallangur, ah, yes, i could ring the Al-Anon office and find out if there is an Al-Anon bus, that is a car that can pick me up from a train or a bus stop, or i could ring up translink and find out there as well, and so what if this isn't going to be easy, but a little challenging, i've been challenged before

27th it is the Boxing Day holiday which is supposed to not mean anything to people who are unemployed, there was a dole diary, brad wrote that, maybe it is time for another one that is like oh i don't know just another one, i feel better than i did before now that i know what i am doing, i am going to the AA meeting at Biala cause i know it will be on, and then i am going to the sandgate al-anon meeting, or at least where it is supposed to be and then i will go to CoDA if i make it that far, i might just want to come home again, it is a big mission, but i did have a big sleep and a sleep in this morning, but i feel much better since i decided what meeting to go to first or maybe it was because i read the pathfinder, that did make me feel better not so isolated. i still don't know how to explain to M what is going on in my head but maybe what i am afraid of is that he won't understand and won't validate me, and my validation can come from myself. in fact it is really what is the thing that is going to help me to get better is to validate myself. and to do all those daily things everyday. when i read the part about only a higher power greater than and a part of me that i am a part of can restore me to sanity, only that can truly restore me to sanity, and that grow meeting is on in Nundah, must find out if that is still going. i feel sorry for michael at home all by himself, but i can't let that rule my life, it is just as hard for him as for me to get him some other job, i still think that if he really had to he could take a day off work and go and get himself another job, or job lead, the heat so perishing but you can get me a job, or sanity, sanity is probably a little more important, and i can't go into the analysis paralysis, i could do that what i see in my room like what i was doing on the train, and i see boxes of stuff that need attention, stuff that needs proper homes a dress that needs finishing a mattress that i could put things on and a hanging thing that i could put things in, it is empty, a box that doesn't have a lot in it either just sitting there, and books and folders that could go on the rack with the clothes on and then the box could go out and the clothes in the hanging thing maybe the bike basket and the blue plastic basket.. i can't actually see them, they are outide, they could go outside into the box where the plastic flowers and wood are the balls of yarn could go in the pink hanger or the blue hanger in M's room